Anchor (lxngdon and MaryGoldRound)

L U C A S
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The fact that she even thought to mention Ryan and in slight comparison hurt far more than he'd ever show. He knew he had done something awful, and that he'd have to pay for it. But that ... Ryan was far worst than he and it didn't matter what things he did that may have been good because there was so much bad it didn't matter.

Lucas gagged.

It wasn't even that he didn't trust her. No, he did trust Claudia. How could he not? The problem lied within himself. Anders was right, he did lack self-confidence. He lacked a lot of it, and Anders had so much. And despite being who he was, Anders was an amazing person to depend on.

"I can be a better boyfriend than you ..."

Those echoing words felt just as true now as they did then.

"Claudia, wait!" He moved to follow after her, to talk with her. But Eden grabbed him by the shirt before he could get far. "God damn it, Eden! Let me go!"

"I don't care what you do with him. I don't want to even look at this asshole," Anders seethed, scowling at Lucas with a mix of anger and disgust. But he didn't stay long, he quickly trailed after Claudia.
 
c l a u d i a
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Claudia's eyes were bleary and she hugged herself tightly as she made her way through the forest, back in the direction of the school. Though, she knew she'd just be going straight home. She couldn't handle this.

It was more than being lied to. No, Lucas had deliberately slandered one of his only friends, manipulated Claudia and proven that he didn't trust her. Even if Claudia had have known about Anderson's crush on her, she wouldn't have acted on it, because she loved Lucas more than anything.

But she was hurting badly.

She heard Anderson come up behind her and she turned around, arching her neck back to look up at the tall Hickory twin. "I'm so sorry he did that to you," she croaked, her hands shaking as she closed her eyes. "And I'm so fucking sorry I believed him. I'm sorry."
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e d e n
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Eden reached out and grabbed Lucas before he could leave. No, Lucas wasn't getting away from this with nothing but a slap on the wrist. He had to suffer, at least a little.

"Jen, do you think we should kill him?" Eden asked casually, still holding onto the back of Lucas's shirt as he assessed the boy, as if he was finding a good place to stab the Remington-Brooks. "I mean, he clearly deserves it and so much more, but I don't particularly fancy going back to prison."

Eden had been hospitalised for beating up a man so badly that he had almost died. He suffered from bipolar disorder and intermittent explosive disorder, and it didn't take Eden much to lose control.

But he was completely in control now.

Eden tossed Lucas against the tree like a ragdoll and picked up the darker blond's camera by the strap it hung from. "Hm, this looks valuable," he remarked, swinging the device around like a yo-yo before he swung it around and smashed it into the tree above Lucas's head. It shattered into several pieces that clunked to the ground.

"More valuable than your girlfriend and your friend, though, apparently."​
 
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A N D E R S
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"It's not your fault," Anders began, his expression softening immensely once seeing Claudia. He couldn't even think about Lucas and his lies anymore. It had hurt and angered him to think - to know that his friend, whom he trusted would stab in the back like that. He hadn't even known or that he was capable of it.

Then again, he also didn't think Bridget, his ex, was capable of stabbing him in the back by basically killing his sister either. It made it so hard for him to trust people, he only had a small circle of those he could trust. And Lucas had been part of that circle.

But despite feeling all of that anger and pain and betrayal and sadness, it was gone in an instant once he was standing in front of Claudia. The only pain he felt now was from seeing how broken she was after all of the bullshit. All he cared to think about now was her and her well-being, her happiness, her safeness.

Because that was the only thing that mattered to him in all of it

"Even if it was your fault, I wouldn't care," And he meant that. He had never meant anything more as he stared into her blue eyes with his own.

"A while back ago, I told you I could be a better boyfriend," His voice was soft, so soft it could hardly be heard by even himself. But he didn't care, his eyed conveyed the message perfectly. "And I can, if you just give me the chance." He licked his lips lightly.

"I really like you." He murmured, leaning over and pressing his lips against hers, closing his eyed and finally tasting the lips he longed for a long time now.

L U C A S
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Lucas had been started and closed his eyes tight when Eden swung the camera above his head. He was waiting for the impact, but it never came. He was sure that the boy would aim for his face. Strangely and luckily, he did not. Instead, he simply broke his camera. Simply.

The dark blonde stated the broken pieces on the floor of the forest. He wanted to believe Eden did not do what his eyes where perceiving, that it was only a hallucination. He had those often, it was part of his illness after. It could all be one big illusion. Everything a big hallucination.

That was he truly wanted to believe. But he knew better than that. He lied about his friend, one if the only people who accepted him ad he was. And he lied to his girlfriend and broke her trust. And though it had took him forever to save up and buy that camera, his comfort, his
self therapy, his passion, he knew he deserved it as much as it hurt.

But the others must be hurting more than him, so he tried his very best to brush it off in a miserable attempt. "So, are you done?" He swallowed.


"Or do you need to rough me up too. Because if not, I need to speak with my girlfriend." He said bitterly and didn't bother waiting for a response before whisking pass him swiftly.

"Lucas, wait ..." Jenna began, her voice cracked, but she had yet to let any tears fall.

But, Lucas didn't wait and sped ahead. He slowed down when seeing Anders back. He had thought the the teen boy would be with Claudia by now.

But when closed in, he came to realize that he was with Claudia. Kissing Claudia. Cupping her face in his hands. And, and, and ...

It was a blow to his chest and in that moment, he forgotten how to breath or move or speak or make himself present. How was he supposed to feel? Because he felt hollow. And somehow that felt more agonizing than anything else.
 
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Claudia stood there, trembling slightly, processed Anderson's words. She listened, she could hear what he was saying, but she was so distraught and confused and upset that she didn't register anything he was saying or doing until he was leaning in and his lips were pressed to hers.

Claudia's eyes widened in alarm. What the hell was he doing? This was why Lucas had lied in the first place! And now, they were all broken and morose and no one knew what to do.

No one but Anders, apparently.

She wanted to push him away, to jump back and to yell and scream and berate him for kissing her when he knew she belonged to Lucas. But for some reason, she couldn't. She couldn't move at all, Claudia Lightwood was frozen in place as her eyelids slid down.

He was a good kisser. And his lips, they were smooth, and warm, and they tasted nice ...

... but not as nice as Lucas's.

Claudia put her hands on Anderson's chest and pushed him away -- not hard, but enough to get her point across. She looked up at him with sad eyes and shook her head. "No. No, I'm sorry, I can't."

Then, Claudia noticed Lucas standing a little way away out of the corner of her eye. She looked at him, and her stomach sank and her lip trembled because even though he had hurt her, she loved him so fucking much and she never wanted to see him in pain. But he had caught her being kissed by another guy. This wasn't going to end well.​
 
L U C A S
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Lucas swallowed the lump in his throat and slowly approached the two, his face devoid of any emotion, empty. Empty like he felt inside, but with each step her go closer, the tighter his chest felt, constricting and squeezing the air out if his lungs. Be was sure he'd topple over at any moment. And if he did, he wasn't sure he'd pick himself back up.

But by some miracle, he didn't. He was standing on front of the too, breathing on deeply from the pit of his stomach and breathing out shakily. He didn't bother himself by looking at Claudia, his eyes were on Anders. And though he wasn't glaring, scowling or snarling at him, his piercing haze could have been ad nasty and mean as all three of those expressions.

"I was going to punch you, but then, I realized how stupid that would have been. You would of had me laying flat on my ass in two seconds flat." He sighed deeply, closing his eyes briefly with a shake of his head. "So, I'll just leave you be for today."

He turned his body to face Claudia and bit the inside of his cheek. "I don't even know what I should actually be saying to you right now." He whispered, but Anders could still hear perfectly clear. Though Lucas didn't care if he heard or not.

"I'm conflicted. And disappointed, I am sure you're equally as disappointed with me too. But you know what, I'm tired, Claudia. Of everything. And so, I'm going home." He looked at Anders and back to Claudia.

"Hopefully that will make you all fucking happy. You do whatever the fuck you want. Kiss Anders or even Ryan, he clearly isn't that bad after all. At least not like me, because I'm a fucking ASSHOLE WHO DESERVES ALL THE SHIT THAT I GET HANDED!" His voice had started to rise gradually until he was full fledge yelling. And as he did so he took a steps backward and away from the both of them.

"SO, GOOD FUCKING DAY TO YOU ALL!" He whipped around and headed back toward the school, but he would only be going home anyway.
 
c l a u d i a
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Throughout Ryan, throughout her bulimia and her time in the psych ward, throughout all the bullshit Claudia Lightwood had ever experienced, she had never wanted to kill herself more than she wanted to now. Seeing the agony on Lucas's face ... she wanted to shrivel up and die.

"Lucas," she choked hoarsely as he retreated. "Lucas, no --"

Eden came through the trees with Jenna and Claudia took off running after her boyfriend, not sparing another glance at the twins or Eden because all she cared about was Lucas. All she had ever cared about was Lucas, and now, because she had been stupid, he was hurting and she didn't know if she could fix it.

"LUCAS!" she cried out just as she reached him on the edge of the forest. She grabbed him by the hand and turned him around so he could see her teary face, her swollen, red eyes and her trembling lip. She was clearly in almost as much pain as he was.

"Lucas, I'm so s - sorry," she sobbed, pulling him closer and wrapping her arms around his stomach tightly. She couldn't let him go. "I'm sorry. I - I - I didn't kiss him. He k - kissed me, and I'm f - fucking sorry for not seeing that he l - liked me before."

Claudia felt so stupid for not seeing it. She looked up at him with watery blue eyes, begging for forgiveness. "I love you. I'll only ever love you. You didn't deserve any of this -- please, please don't leave me. I love you so fucking much."​
 
L U C A S
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Lucas clenched and unclenched his fist several times, his entire body was trembling gently. He stood in place, listening to Claudia cry against him with her teary, red, puffed eyed face full of hurt imprinted in his head. He swallowed down hard on the lump stuck in his throat and bit down hard on the inside of his lip until his tongue was filled with the metallic taste of blood.

He believed her of course, that she loved him. How could he not when he wanted and needed to believe her. And he loved her too, just as much and if not more. He would always love Claudia despite anything he did or she did. Even if he did believe she kissed Anders, he wouldn't have stopped living her as much. In fact, even now, he loved her so much and wanted to do nothing more and hold her tight until she stopped hurting.

Her pain was always more than his own, it always meant more than his own. But he had meant what he said. He was tired. Of everything. Of all the pain and agony. Of all the constant bullshit. And most of all his own self. How could one person be such a fucking a loser.

"Claudia ... " He took her arms from around him and pulled back so he could look her in the face. "Don't cry over me, alright?"

If there was one thing he was certain of, he really did deserve all that came his way. All of it. Except for, anyway. His in the world he'd ever gained her love was beyond his understanding. But he didn't care until now whether he deserved it or not.

"Please don't cry." He wiped away her tears gently, his own voice cracking. "You should go home. I'll tell your brothers and they'll take you back."

He clenched his teeth for a moment. "We can talk to tomorrow. But right now ... I can't, I really can't."

He was falling apart.
 
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Claudia could have died.

She let him go, only because she knew she was causing him pain. That ripped her apart so much more than anything else -- so much more than the lies, the deception, Anders, everything. She was responsible for his pain and Claudia couldn't handle that.

So she stayed away. She fully intended to speak to him the next day, but Brogen, her beloved twin, had had an anaphylactic reaction to peanuts and he had been hospitalised. Seeing her brother almost die, on top of everything else, sent Claudia over the edge and she relapsed.

Meaning, she started throwing up again. And a single cut had been made, this one to her thigh.

She knew she wasn't thinking straight and she needed help but in her mind, she deserved this for doing this to Lucas. For not stopping Anders before he escalated and for just being a shitty person in general. She spent a couple of nights in the hospital with Brogen as her twin recovered from almost dying, but also for herself, as her mother had caught her cutting.

She had been freed a week after the drama with Anders and now Claudia was walking along a low wall beside the lake in the park. Claudia saw Lucas out of the corner of her eye, and she watched him slightly, not paying attention to where she was walking.

She lost her footing and slipped into the lake with a small shriek. Her head hit a small boulder and her foot got caught under a branch. She was stuck.

I deserve this ...​
 
L U C A S
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A week.

A full week had passed and not even one of those days were spent with Claudia. He had heard about Brogen's accident and his hospitalization. And the first thing he thought to do was to rush to Claudia and hug her, make her feel better in anyway possible. But he didn't. He couldn't.

He only sat staring at his phone each day on the verge if calling her, but never doing so. He had wrote at least fifty long text messages, but never sent them. Though, he had gone to her house once, to check on her. But when he arrived the only people home were her mother, whom had indifferent feelings toward him, and Quentin. She was with her twin, so he left and never went back.

His week had been consumed with worry and thoughts of Claudia, which only doubled his pain. So, he stayed home, it was easier that way. No one would see him have an episode so close together and he could avoid Anders and the other two.

But he didn't cut himself. No, he didn't need to. His hallucinations had been a wildly more vivid and painful, making it harder for him to think straight and recognize it as so. His brain tricked him into hurting himself.

So, when the week passed he willingly went to the lake park. The very same one in which his brother died. Newton.

Some days he missed his older brother so much he broke down in tears and cried for hours. The only time he ever saw his brother now was in dreams or near any body if water. And it terrified him horrible. But he went to the lake and stood little ways away from it, staring at the illusion beside him.

A boy no older than twelve with pale skin, a blue tinge to it. And he was soaked, dripping water. Most of all, he was Lucas's dead brother, and he was silent for the dead did not speak. He stared at him, this was what he looked like when they trudged his body out of the lake, the last time he saw him because he refused to attend the funeral. But he wondered, what would New to look like now? Age eighteen, still vibrant and playful and amazing. What would he look like if Lucas had died instead of him. Like he was supposed to.

If he had drowned, none of the things that were going on his life and the people whom he loved life's would be happening. And just as he thought that he heard a shriek and watched her fall into the lake with a splash. Claudia.

"Claudia!?" Lucas called frantically.

He immediately ran over to the spot she fell and watched the ripples of her dropping place in the water. And he waited. She didn't resurface. A fear so strong crept up his spine he almost puked, and when he turned to look at Newton, he gave him a face as if to say. I guess she'll be joining me.

No, he couldn't let it all happen all over again. Not to Claudia. He wouldn't be able to live with himself. He jumped in after her and couldn't allow himself to panic, to freak out or to be scared. All that was on his mind was to save Claudia.

He didn't wonder why she wasn't moving, but it scared him relentless as to the possibility why. He only wrapped his arms around her and soon noticed the branch. He kicked, and he kicked until she was freed from its hold. He wasted no time resurfacing and dragging her up onto land.

"Claudia? Claudia?!" He gasped for air crazily despite having plenty to breathe in. He was hyperventilating now.

He patted her face, wanting and hoping for her to open her eyes. He held her shoulders and shook her, not very gently either. His eyes started tearing up, his vision blurred and he started to cry.

"Are you awake?! Wake up! WAKE UP! Please, please don't die. Need you."He choked up, hiccuping, hardly breathing in the midst of a panic attack. She hadn't been in the water long, but he was freaking out so badly he couldn't think straight or reasonable.
 
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Claudia was fading away.

She could feel her consciousness slipping out of her, seeping into the water around her like her hair, which was forming a golden halo around her head. She hadn't struggled with the branch -- maybe, if she went, she'd stop hurting. She'd stop hurting everyone around her, because she was toxic.

Just as her eyelids started to slide down, someone grabbed her around the waist. She was barely aware of that same someone kicking the branch free and dragging her back up to the surface. She still couldn't breathe, she couldn't move or even open her eyes.

And she didn't want to. Maybe, if she faded away, she'd stop hurting Lucas ...

Lucas.

His voice brought her back to consciousness and she lurched forward, coughing up a large amount of water that splashed onto her stomach and brought up a little bit of phlegm with it. Her eyes wrenched open and she thumped back against the grass, gasping for hair as if there was still water in her lungs.

"L - L - Lucas?" she spluttered, her eyes wildly searching for his face. Her vision was still rather blurry and she couldn't see him properly.​
 
L U C A S
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Lucas had never been so happy and relieved in his entirety of living before to see Claudia cough up and open her blue eyes. He choked, shivering so badly his teeth began to chatter, but at the least his breathing pattern returned to normal somewhat. Though, the tears in his eyes still flowed freely, dripping down his chin along with the fresh water from the lake that he was soaked in.

He held on to the cuff of his wet sleeve and attempted to brush away the water mixed in with his salty tears. He tried to think carefully and reasonably. He was trying to relax because she was okay now. It meant he had nothing to worry about, but ...

"Why didn't you struggle!?"Why didn't she try to escape, not even a little? It sure as he didn't look as if she was trying.

His eyes were reflecting his compound of feelings. Anger, sadness, yearning, fear, relief, love. Despite his yelling, he gently, so very gently as if she was delicate glass, lifted her from the grass and took her in his arms, laying her head against his shoulder and keeping his arms around her waist tight and secure.

"I thought you were dead ... " He admitted, softly whispering.
 
c l a u d i a
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Claudia flinched at his yelling, because she really believed he was mad at her. She didn't know what was wrong with her, but her brain seemed justified in telling her that he should have been yelling at her. That she deserved it, she deserved anything she got from him right now because she was a bad person and she didn't deserve Lucas Remington-Brooks.

But he pulled her in closer and held her tight and she could see, in his eyes and his body language, that for some unfathomable reason, he wasn't mad at her. No, he loved her, even though she had proven that she did not deserve his love. She was just as bad as him, worse, even. She was just as bad as Ryan.

"I ... I ... I don't know," Claudia choked. She didn't know why she hadn't struggled.

She burst into tears.

"Oh - oh my God, Lucas, I missed you so much." Trembling from both the cold of the lake and the emotions that were suffocating her like a stack of boulders, piled on top of her chest, Claudia frantically wrapped her arms around Lucas's shoulders and pressed his soaked body against hers. She was crying uncontrollably and hid her face in his shoulder, keeping him as close to her as possible because, as much as she hated herself, she needed him. She needed Lucas like normal people needed air to breathe.

"I'm so sorry I didn't call or text or anything -- Brogen could have died, I was hurting so fucking much." She knew he didn't need to tell him that but she couldn't stop the words from gushing out of her mouth. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry about everything, about Anders, Brogen, Tate, Crystal -- I'm so fucking sorry. I love you. I love you so much."​
 
L U C A S
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He had been longing to hold her close so badly that now he was doing the action, he never wanted to let go. And never now, when she was crying so much and clearly in as much pain. The time they spent only proved to damage them even further. He loved and needed her just as much she loved and needed him.

It only made him want to cry more, but he didn't. He couldn't, he wanted to be strong for Claudia and himself in that moment. So, over her shoulder her raised an arm and rubbed away the traces of tears from his face.

"Claudia, Claudia, listen to me." Reluctantly, he pulled out of their embrace and cupped her face in his hands, tenderly brushing away her tears with his thumb. He swallowed.

He missed seeing her face, her everything for a long time. He couldn't help but admire how beautiful she was no matter what she was doing, no matter what expression she wore. She was the mist beautiful thing he'd ever laid eyes on and it would stay that way.

"You're beautiful," He whispered, letting his thoughts slip unapologetically. "You shouldn't be sorry, you haven't done a thing wrong. You never have. It's not your fault."

He breathed, "I lied to you, I broke your trust, and slandered my friend knowing the full truth. I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry."

And it was true, it didn't matter to him that Anders kissed her or that she couldn't and wouldn't contact him or that Tate tried to kick his ass or Crystal torturing him from the beginning. It wasn't her fault and even if it was he wouldn't care.

"I know I'll deserve you or your love, but I love you. I love you so fucking much it hurts." He grasped at his chest where his aching heart laid beneath.
 
c l a u d i a
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Claudia knew she should still be angry -- after all, Lucas had hurt her and Anderson badly. So badly that Claudia had been sent over the edge, pushed by this and all the other bullshit piling on top of her. But she knew she deserved that and she couldn't blame him for her weakness.

Claudia cupped the sides of his face in her pale hands and leaned in to give him a firm, passionate kiss to the lips, the lips she had craved for a solid week. It had drove her mad, not being able to kiss and touch and hold her boyfriend, her love. The only beacon in the darkness that was swallowing her up.

"I - I - I forgive you," Claudia croaked.

How could she not, when he had forgiven her for all the crappy shit she had done to him and everyone else?

Claudia pulled back and looked at him with tired, bleary blue eyes. "I love you. I love you so fucking much. I ... I know why you did it, because you were afraid of losing me. But there was never any competition with Anders and there never will be. I only love you."

She'd only ever loved him. And she only ever would love him.

"I love you so much. I swear to God, it was like torture, being away from you so long. I nearly died." That was true, though that had nothing to do with Lucas.​
 
L U C A S
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Lucas didn't have the right. He didn't have the right to have her forgiveness and he was well aware of that. He had hurt her and he shouldn't have regardless the reason. Whether it be because he had been in pain or because he was afraid, or both. He was the one person who was never supposed to hurt her, but he had.

In spite of that, he took it. He took her forgiveness and her love and pulled her into another passionate kiss, desperate for the taste and feel and warmth of her lips. He needed her so badly, he had to be selfish. He had to be with her even if she deserved better, all he could offer her was his love and affection.

He knotted his fingers in her what gold locks and deepened the kiss, angling his head to the side slightly. He didn't want to let go, but he did, for air. He gulped in a long breath and embraced her again.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He whispered into her hair, kissing the side of her head. "I'm here now, and I'll be be better. I'm sorry."
 
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"I know you will be. I love you."

Claudia had put all her faith and trust and love and feelings and soul into Lucas's hands and she knew he would take care of her. Even though he had lied, even though she had no right to him whatsoever, she trusted him and she knew he would love her until the day they died in each other's arms.

She gave him another small, affectionate kiss to the lips and shakily stood up. Her head was aching and her leg was sore, meaning she was limping a little, but she ignored it. She hadn't brought her phone, so she borrowed Lucas's and called Quentin.

He was there in seven minutes and Claudia lead Lucas over to the car. "What the fuck happened?" Quentin demanded, pulling blankets and towels out of the trunk and laying them over the backseat. Claudia helped Lucas in and got in after him, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders.

"I fell in the lake. Lucas saved me."

Quentin looked at her as if he thought she was lying and got into the front seat. "Where am I going?"

"Home. I want Lucas there."

"Mom is there."

"She can go fuck herself. If I can't have Brogen I'm having Lucas there with me."

Quentin didn't argue.​
 
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Lucas was still skating terribly even underneath the blanket. Bit it wasn't from the cool air around them and the water they were drenched in. No, it wasn't that. He could withstand that easily. It wasn't a bog deal to him in the least. And it was not about her mother either as much ad he knee she hated him.

He close his eyes briefly and he put half of his blanket around Claudia. He moved himself over closer so they would be able to share body heat. He grabbed her hand held it tightly as the drove past the lake and away. He turned away when it came into fire and shut his eyes tightly, not peeling them open until they were gone snd it was out of sight.

The ride back to her house was thankfully short, though he hadn't said a word on the way there. "What do you want to do?" He asked, prepared to do anything she wished.
 
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"Right now, I want to take a shower."

They passed Daphne on their way upstairs and Claudia's mother gave Lucas a wide-eyed look, as if she couldn't believe he was in her house. She opened her mouth to say something but Quentin cut her off, explaining the situation. Claudia shot him a grateful look and lead Lucas upstairs.

Once they were in her bedroom, she locked the door, since she didn't want to deal with her mother in that moment. Claudia peeled off her wet layers of clothes -- sweater, shirt, camisole and jeans until she was left in her pale blue bra and black underwear. The cut she had made to her thigh was visible, and she licked her lips. She didn't want to tell him, but she couldn't lie, either.

"I, um, got upset about Brogen," she whispered, gesturing to the cut, embarrassed, as she went into the bathroom to run them both a hot shower.

​
 
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Lucas rubbed his eyes and tried not to look sad to see the cut on her thigh. He kept an impassive face to hide the immense sadness he was feeling on the inside. He knew it would only make her feel bad to know her actions made he feel that way. It wasn't something to feel totally ashamed of, she was only coping with the pain the only way she knew how. He knew that too because he had been doing it for years.

"I ... um, I can't wait after you to take one. A shower."

Her played with the hem of his sleeve collar. No, he hadn't been cutting, but he had been hurt due to his own weakness against his illness. And he didn't know if he could explain it all. At the same time, he didn't want to hold anything back from her again, he didn't want to hurt her.

"No, no, never mind, is there a change of clothes I can use?" He inquired, ruffling his wet hair.
 
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"You need to take a shower, you have algae in your hair."

Claudia's voice was soft and her skin was pale. She was clearly mortified due to her cut, the single slice to her soft skin that she had made in a moment of hazy confusion and agony. Her mother had caught her in the act, in Brogen's hospital bathroom, and Daphne had cried, almost as much as she had when she had learned of Claudia's miscarriage. Daphne had put her in the ward with Brogen for a few nights, but she didn't even know about the throwing up.

And neither did Lucas.

Claudia extracted the pyjamas he had worn on the weekend they had first made love out of the drawers in her walk-in closet and carried them into the bathroom, leading Lucas in. She stepped into the shower with her bra and underwear still on, moved to the side so he had room and let the hot water rush over her skin, replacing the cold lake water with warmth.

And then she started to cry.

It was soft, almost unnoticeable trembling, tears washing away with the water. Silent. But she sank to the floor of the shower anyway and buried her face in her hands. Claudia's world was crashing around her ears and she didn't want to live in it anymore.​
 
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