Corrupt-A-Wish

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Granted. Hundreds of trolls flock to your RP and use it as a spam thread, utterly ruining everyone's experience. It makes it so that even you want to pull the plug on it, but since you wished that your RPs "wouldn't die until they officially reach their end"...

I wish for more genies.
 
Granted. More genies appear to everyone in the world and since everyone in the world is making wishes and having them granted the world falls into chaos and someone you hate also wishes that you were never born. You now have never existed and thus your wish was never made, reverting the world back to normal without you in it.

I wish that all of the genies in the world would disappear.
 
Granted. All the genies in the world disappear. Since shooting stars are unreliable, birthdays only come once a year, the 'first star' you see at night is already dead, and fairies rarely show themselves, demons become the top wish-granters. They grant everyone's wishes, but the consequences are far worse than what any genie would conjure up in addition to the wisher no longer having a soul.

I wish I could grant my own wishes.
 
Granted, but the consequences for granting your own wish increase tenfold, so by the time you've managed to make and grant three wishes the word will end.

I wish I felt creative today.
 
Granted. You feel creative today. However, you now lack the materials to express said creativity in any possible way. This includes you having a sore throat so you can't sing.

I wish I had a cup of delicious, non-poisonous tea that I'm not allergic to.
 
Granted. The hot tea is poured on your face, then the accompanying cup is crushed upon the burns.

I wish for this wish to not be corrupted.
 
Granted. There now exist a parallel universe where your wish isn't corrupted.

I wish to live a long life and die surrounded by loved ones.
 
Granted. You and your loved ones are forced into a mausoleum. You live one hundred years longer than them. So you spend the next one hundred years of your life surrounded by dead loved ones. You go insane not too long after, and die in a frenzy as you fear their spirits are coming to claim you.

I wish I was behind all of this corruption of wishes
 
Granted. You are the mastermind behind all the horrid corruptions of these people wishes. Since everyone now knows this, all of the (live) people who's wishes you granted come after you, capture you, and then torture you in all sorts of excruciating ways until you die.

I wish I had fangs similar to that of a vampire, but I still remained human, not a blood-drinking murderous vampire that anyone hunts down and kills.
 
Granted. Here's a set of plastic teeth similiar to a vampire's. You know, the kind they sell to kids for a Dollar/Euro a piece, and look so cheap that you don't want to shell out even that little.

I wish for a magic wallet that:
- Won't be stolen, destroyed or is otherwise taken away from my possesion
- Always has the exact amount of money in it that I want, in the currency that I want it to be.
- Does not steal the money from other peole, and does not produce fake money.
- Will not harm me or others.
 
Granted. Your foot is now your wallet

I wish I could watch/play/read any anime/VN/game/Manga with out any trouble from the law, annoying ads and popups, no pointless downloads, and does not give my computer any viruses
 
Granted. It takes forever and ever for it to load though, and the quality of both the audio and video is abysmal.

I wish that people didn't just drop out of RPs without any warning whatsoever, leaving everyone else stuck and unable to progress.
 
Granted. Now they give you warning when they drop out, but it makes everyone else want to drop out as well, making the RP die instantly.

I wish for one ordinary, completely normal, regular sized, not alive, non-counterfeit dollar that isn't stolen from anyone nor can it somehow come along with anything or anyone that harms me or anyone else in the word in any way, shape, or form. And no, it is a legal US Dollar, legal tender, not monopoly money or anything like that.
 
Granted, however as a dollar isn't really enough to buy anything aside from gum with these days, you quickly feel dissatisfied with your wish. Too bad. You wished for one so one is all you get. You'll have to earn the rest somehow, and so you go out to get a job and end up with a supervisor you hate.

I wish I could get through a workday without hearing that somebody complain.
 
Granted. That somebody dies and you are pinned for the murder because people know you wished for it. You get sent to prison for life. Don't drop the soap.

I wish that people would stop asking corrupt genies for wishes.
 
Granted. Now they'll ask literal genies wishes, which can be just as bad. Oh, and to said literal genies, everything that can be remotely interpreted as a wish counts as a wish, including things like 'I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener' and 'I wish they died. Did I notice they're everywhere?

I wish to be able to fly -- again.
 
Granted. You will fly forever. You are now unable to touch the ground. Should you get close, you will be flung back into the air like a magnet with the same polarity. Earth has rejected you, and space will not accept you; the rest of your life will be spent living among the clouds and diving for food in a manner similar to bungee jumping.

I wish that Hans will truly feel guilty for being a total scumbag, mend his ways, and apologize to Anna and Elsa.
 
Granted. He feels so bad about himself that, after apologizing to the people in question, he commits suicide. According to the law, this means that you essentially drove him to suicide, which is very close to murder depending on your intentions. Since there's no intent of death, but your actions are the direct cause of the event, that would likely make it manslaughter. Have fun in jail ^_^

I wish for moar powah!
 
(:blinky: that's "mending his ways"?)

I dub thee with the "Powah of Moar." What is moar?
2. An order bellowed to a forum to remedy the bellower's insufficient pr0n collection. Usually accompanied by foaming at the mouth.
Click to expand...
Every cry of "She's hawt! Moar!" you bellow--as long as you're properly foaming at the mouth--will be answered with moar. If you ever switch back to using actual English, though, your Moar Powah will be revoked. Your bellows for moar hawt pr0n must be typo-ridden, foam-spittled and insufferably enraging; if they are anything even slightly closer to human, you will lose the powah.

I wish neobullseye would translate her signature into English.
 
(Err... Update: He tried to apologize, but said apology wasn't accepted. Thoroughly heartbroken, he cannot continue living with a past he cannot correct, yet feels he must. Then he snaps, and the rest of the wish goes on as normal. Better? *innocent smile*)



Granted. The (rough) translation is:
"Oh how holy, how serene,
How generous, how lovely
Oh Lily of purity."

The problem is that now you can only read Latin, which means it's just as inunderstandable as before,


I wish that I could read, speak, write and understand any and all languages in the world without mixing them up and without speaking the 'wrong' language at any given time.




(I'm a 'him', by the way. Blame it on a thematic avatar/sig combination)
 
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