Unwinding the Immortal Coil

The tiny woman sighed and nodded. "Perhaps one drink." She motioned for him to lead the way, then followed after him.

The bar from whence Feng came was shockingly empty. No Kina, no drunken betters, but a few new people were present. Some people who overheard the dare stared guiltily, then began to filter out, avoiding Jade's confused gaze.

"Is something happening of which I am not aware?" She directed her attention toward Feng as she asked, one brow lifted slightly in the only hint of expression on her face.
 
Feng grinned as she agreed. It was quite amazing how she didn't even seem to notice how drunk he was, or if she did notice, still went on with his stupid drunk idea. A normal sober Feng would have called her an idiot by this point.

As they arrived at the bar it seemed awfully empty. Not that Feng noticed it much, the only thing he noticed was the absence of Kina and the people who were most eager for the dare.

"If u no aware, Ima no awae ether." Feng chuckled. "Ur not suspicting me foe somethin, a u? Tha huts. No uan wanna trust me. All Ima guud foe is to gut totued foe science an made a fool of foe othes pleasure. Wha dus i matter, he's immotal, can handle it, no probs. Less no ask him wha he want o feel, cas who care bout tha?" He seriously seemed hurt as he seemingly accidentally entered a rant, like many emotional drunks would. He wasn't that emotional though, he had a goal, and sympathy was one way of getting there. Even as he was drunk, he could still use some parts of his brain to realize what emotions he had to win over. Then if he was correct, that was another point entirely.
 
The small woman listened to him, but finally just sighed. "A man incapable of becoming drunk wakes me up with the smell of alcohol so strong it is almost enough to get me drunk. He is accompanied by a noisy group of drunken Hunters. I allow him to lead me to a bar notorious for drunken dares. When we arrive, it is almost empty, and the remainder of its customers leave at the sight of me."

Tired red eyes turned to look at Feng.

"Perhaps you were right before, about how I should not trust so easily."

She slid a hand under her bangs, and let her palm rest against her forehead as the overtired young woman rested her back against the bar. She pushed her bangs up and returned her gaze to the man, then looked down and away.

Had he taken her to any of the other bars, had this not been deserted, had he not been who he was—if any one of those had been different, she might have believed him. Had he been accompanied by Kina, her trust would have been absolute. Kina would have ensured nothing happened that would harm anyone.

"What is the dare?"
 
Oops, busted. Even a drunk Feng could realize when there wasn't any point in trying anymore. "Ima dun kno if I shud be sad ova not gettin moe drings o happi tha u haf brains enogh no to trusht a drunk stranger." Feng mumbled barely audible.

"The wanned me to sedushe u." Feng then said casually. "Kina gut me this incrudible dring, an then sad this ba wud be moa fun, then thei sai Ima won't get moa if I dun earn em from ther stoopid game." He explained the situation, seeming more disappointed over missing out on more drinks rather than sorry for what had happened.

"I wud say sorri, but u'd prob be smart enugh to kno Ima lyin." He finished. Apologizing definitely wasn't his thing. "U mad at me?" He then asked, more out of curiosity rather than being genuinely worried he had offended her.
 
Despite his slurring, Jade had no issues understanding him. At his question, she simply shook her head. "Thank you for telling me. I am not mad."

He sounded like he was just a dumb kid who tried to do something dumb because a bunch of other dumb kids egged him on. That he approached and acted like he cared just for a drink stung, but she kept her thoughts to herself.

He was too drunk to know better, she was sure. "For future reference, you can ask the man there, behind the bar, what drink Hunter Kina ordered for you. After that, you can order it yourself from a different bar, though I advise getting money before you do, or they will put you to work cleaning their bathrooms."

She gave him a few moments to process what she said, then spoke again. "If you wish to earn money, you may come speak to me in my office after you have sobered."

The tiny woman's chest hurt at the blow Feng likely never realized he delivered—she was only worth attention for the sake of a reward, he thought she was a complete imbecile, and he wasn't sorry. She didn't lie—she didn't feel mad. She felt hurt.

She drew her attention away from her conversation with Feng, then waved to the bar's tender. "Host Nicola. Two orders of cheese planks to go, please, and a pitcher of water for Souse Feng. Please bill me for anything he orders that is non-alcoholic."

Nicola, a thin and gaunt man, nodded as he departed to the kitchen. He returned moments later with a basket lined with waxed paper and filled with nearly two dozen golden, deep-fried sticks—each two and a half centimeters wide and seven long. Grease visibly pooled in the wax paper at the bottom of the basket as it rested for only a moment on the bar. A cup of red sauce rested atop the sticks.

"Thank you, Host Nicola." Jade bowed her head. Holding the basket, she didn't look big enough to eat it on her own, and yet she didn't let it linger, nor did she offer any to Feng. Instead, she opened a portal to a dark and clean-looking bedroom and stepped through. She placed the basket on a small table beside the large bed before she looked back and raised a hand, ready to close the portal.

A few Hunters peeked in the doorway of the bar.
 
As if he would even order anything that wasn't alcoholic. "Fo tha record, Ima no drunk. Ima tipsi." Feng corrected her first when she had entered the portal to her room. Then he swept the water in one go before leaving the bar. Nothing more to do there when he didn't have any alcohol.

He was mumbling almost unhearable swear words in different languages. Those bastards just abandoned him like that. Bet they wouldn't even have paid up if he had succeeded. Somehow he was able to stumble back to the room he had woken up in earlier that day, and when he didn't have anything to do, he actually became tired very quickly. Soon he was asleep. It was odd for him to sleep so close in on the last time he slept, but maybe that was just what happened when people got drunk.

As he woke up his head hurt worse than the last time he woke. "F. U. C. K. What bitch drilled a hole into my skull?" He grumbled. Then his memories of the previous night started to return. He stared at the ceiling for a moment, his eyes growing larger for every second. His cheeks even turned red as he remembered how he acted towards both the pink haired girl and Jade. Not that he minded if they thought poorly of him, but the thought of him acting like a complete dumbass who can't read the situation at all was just embarrassing.

"Damn that annoying woman, I'll freaking kill you ten times over." Of course he didn't mean it, and in reality he was more angry at himself for trusting her rather than being angry at her for using him, but it was easier to just project that anger onto her, so that was most likely what he would do.

Feng did make an attempt to get up, but the headache made him dizzy, so he laid back down. Where were those miracle pills when he needed them? "Freaking monkeys tricking me into such a stupid game." He grumbled more as he covered his eyes, trying not to let any light from the lamps in.
 
Kina stood outside his door, his rant audible to her as she rolled her eyes. Thankfully, she hadn't needed to protect Jade. More thankfully, he was a gentleman about saying he'd only show interest in her for a profit... Well...

Enough on that, she decided to step in.

"FengFeng, I brought water and a hangover cure," she chimed in a quiet voice as she flicked the lights off for him, letting him get by on the dim light from the doorway to offer him relief for his head.

"You and the boys became carried away. I am glad for your sake that you failed in that dare." She shrugged, looking tired, but her usual chipper and grinning self, despite how she wanted to tug on Feng's ear and tell him not to take dares from drunk people. She had, after all, remained utterly sober. She'd wanted innocent fun.

Granted, that dare bar usually didn't have that many non-regulars. Looking into it after things settled, she discovered it had been a reunion for a Hunter returned from a very long mission. Those celebrants were the ones who dared him to try to go after Jade—particularly, the new returner, who left under Council rule and returned to find a girl who looked like a teenager in charge and able to boss around even big, bad Ortega and Phil.

Amazing what shock and bitterness could do to someone when they couldn't cope with having a leader younger than them.

Ah well.

She held a large bottle of water in one hand and a bright blue drink labeled "PowerAde" in the other.

"Here. This first. I think it is supposed to taste like some form of berry. Perhaps raspberry." She handed him the unnatural blue drink after she opened it for him. "It will help you more than water on its own."
 
"If I wasn't in so much pain, I would.. Ugh, I can't even think of anything right now." He was a bit too hangover to even care to waste his energy on being tired. If he were too emotional in any shape, his head only got worse.

"Carried away? Seriously, I was so out of it, you could literally have dragged me out of there and I wouldn't have been able to do anything else but to stumble after you. Instead of disappearing when a situation goes overboard when YOU created it, maybe you should take some freaking responsibility and just knock me." Getting knocked out did seem like the better option. He was talking quite quietly so that his head wouldn't hurt as much.

Feng took the drinks and didn't take more than a few seconds on finishing each one, then he laid back down. "This is the last time I accept anything drinkable from you." Feng informed the woman. There was no way he would let her use him like that again. A deep sigh escaped him. "Thanks for making me feel like a horrible person for the first time in a millennium. Now I feel like apologizing, and I never feel I've done something that deserves apologizing for." It was definitely not a feeling he liked, and he was not appreciating the favor.

"Of course, when I apologize, I will blame you for 90% of this disaster like the vain person I am." At least he was honest.
 
Kina simply let him ramble on, amusement in her features as she watched him and nodded occasionally.

"Yes, yes. I should not have gone to get help to try to disperse the crowd of frat boys," she half-heartedly apologized, sounding more like a comforting parent than someone who felt she was in the wrong. "Although you are right, I did create the situation by not knowing who would be present at the bar."

The woman absently adjusted the edge of her hair wrap. "I expected only the regulars, who could handle their drinks, and who would not ask anything too terrible of you. The ones who dared you to seduce Jade... they were celebrating the return of one who left on a mission under Council rule and came back to discover our leader is a child, by our standards. They were drunk and bitter."

In her admitting not to knowing the situation, she finally showed some remorse.

She half-wanted to deliver his apology for him, but the other half that wanted to watch the train wreck was larger.

"Give the fluids a few minutes to soak in. The headache should fade as they do." With that, she placed another powerade in front of him, already opened so he could get into it easily.
 
"Yeah, it would have been so much better if there only had been regulars there whom had used me for their amusement until I or they passed out. For me personally it was better that they did such a stupid thing since she actually stopped me from going any further. If I had followed your advice, I might have gotten into bed with a drunk dude I don't even know." He stopped his ranting to get another bottle down. Even if those specific guys hadn't been there, he was certain such an opportunity would have showed itself at some other point during the night.

"I'm not the type to get drunk people into bed, and I'd rather not get myself into bed with someone when I'm drunk. That is stuff that you'll regret for a thousand years to come, no matter if they're female or male. Though females are a lot worse considering their habits of bringing new life to the world." Feng was finally feeling well enough to sit up, though he did not even think about trying to stand yet.

"I'll give you a fair warning now, do this again, and I'll rip your pretty hair out in public." It was probably hard for her to know if he was serious or not about the threat considering he himself wasn't sure if he actually would do it. Sure, he was good at offending people, but it took quite a lot for him to lay a hand on anyone in any way for any reason. Even though there were times he actually joined armies and such, there usually was a good reason for it that didn't steem from anger.
 
The lighthearted manner disappeared entirely from Kina's demeanor at his threat. She grinned, but there was steel behind it as she spoke in a normal tone, no longer whispering for his benefit. "I will also give you 'fair warning'. If you threaten that again, I might mistake you for an enemy."

"As for the dare to seduce the Hunter, it was not a good one, I admit, but I was trying to appeal to your pride to prevent you making a bigger fool of yourself than I anticipated you would if I dared you to something simpler. He was oblivious to homosexuality anyway, and would have turned you down, and then likely forgotten it and given you a drink for making him laugh."

She squinted at him in what almost looked like a glare. "Yes, I freely admit I wanted to have a laugh, but I did not want a laugh that would cause you harm or lasting embarrassment."

Her smile appeared too tight as she flashed it briefly, then turned from him and walked to the door. "Do not worry, I will not give you anything alcoholic from here on."

A water bottle flung itself suddenly at Feng and slammed into his chest, and then the door clapped shut loudly behind Kina.
 
Feng seemed quite unfaced by the threat. What could she possibly do to an immortal?

"Appeal to my pride? What pride did I have when I was too intoxicated to even remember my own name. Non of my thousands of names. You could have asked me to eat from a non flushed toilet for a drink and I would have done it. There was no pride and you know that."

Feng obviously didn't believe a word of what she said about not wanting to do anything that would give him lasting embarrassment or cause him harm. Luckily she just left so they wouldn't continue to argue about it for an hour.

"Annoying woman." Feng muttered after catching his breath from the bottle that flew right into his chest. She had no right to be pissed at him after what happened the previous night. If she wasn't the key for his death, he would definitely leave that place right there and then. "It's only a hundred years. Just tolerate it." He tried to convince himself, though right at that moment he felt like taking a hundred years break from her.

After resting for a bit longer, Feng started walking through the corridor. Even though he had been extremely drunk the other day, he still remembered the way to Jade's office very clearly.

Once outside of her office, he took a few deep breaths before knocking. Once being let inside, Feng didn't waste any time as he just wanted it to be over and done with.

"Hey, about yesterday." He started, pausing for just a second to collect his thoughts a bit. "This is not something I usually do, so I'm rather bad at it, last time was probably a thousand or so years ago, so I'm a bit rusty in this deparment, but non the less, uhm... I apologize. What happened yesterday, it was stupid of me, I should never have accepted a suspicious drink from someone I barely know, and even from what I know of her, I should have suspected her to be up to something. Even though I technically speaking had no reason to believe I actually could get drunk, I should still have been careful when being in this new environment. I am very happy that you did not take advantage of my state of mind even though you had every opportunity to do so and I appreciate and respect you for being so mature considering the circumstances. I would never try to seduce you if I was in my right mind, I swear."

That last sentence wasn't meant to hurt her, even though anyone would take it to mean something bad. He never tried to seduce anyone. If he tried to seduce people it usually meant that he was after something, and that wasn't something he had done in a long time. The times when he actually had gotten into relationships or one night stands had been because other people had seduced him. He never took the first step. But without that context, it did sound rather bad.
 
Jade's eyes flicked to the open doorway, and she nodded for Feng to enter. Ortega stood from his seat nearby, where he'd been reading a letter.

The girl's eyes remained locked on Feng as he spoke, her gaze penetratingly devoid of expression.

What an arrogant prick. Why would I take advantage of him? Did he really think I was that immature before last night? Am I that unappealing to him that he thinks that's supposed to reassure me?

She kept her thoughts to herself as she heard him out, then let the silence stretch for a few moments. Kina, it seemed, had not been exaggerating when she said he'd probably blame her, or that he was awful at apologies. The other woman had been there earlier to deliver her own apology to Jade, and even told her the names of all involved.

Jade let out a slow breath, almost a sigh but not quite.

"Thank you."

It wasn't forgiveness, merely acceptance of his apology. She doubted he truly cared if she forgave him—though likely she would when the sting of his words faded, anyway.

Still, her lips seemed to move on their own.

"And you have no reason to fear my taking advantage of you." It was a 'kind' way to say she saw nothing in him worth taking advantage of, and she knew it. A petty part of her thought it fitting, given that he saw nothing about her worth interacting with unless he was offered drinks.

That fondness she felt when he protected her while she was stranded was rapidly fading as she faced the reality of the man. He cared only for himself, down to the core. He was immature—moreso than her, and she knew she was doomed to being an eternal teenager, in terms of mental and emotional development.

"Was there anything else?"
 
"I see, that's good to hear." Feng replied to her comeback. No matter if she meant it in a bad or good way, it gave the same favorable outcome for Feng. "That was all I suppose. I didn't expect it to end so easily. Usually I only have to open my mouth for women to either give me a lecture on manners or to slap me. You should stop being so nice to men like me, otherwise someone will take advantage of you someday. I guess it's a good thing I'm not interested in women, otherwise I might just have tried for the heck of it." He shrugged and stared to walk to the door. "See ya around."

Another sentence that could be completely misunderstood without him noticing or caring. He was out of the room before even noticing if she picked up on his very easily misinterpreted line.
 
Jade let him go, then waited a few minutes before she looked toward Ortega in silent question. He nodded once he heard silence from outside, and she finally groaned aloud. "Well, at least it is not that I am wholly and entirely unattractive! No, he is merely homosexual! Of course that explains why he only showed any care for me when he was drunk on a dare trying to get more alcohol! And I am too nice? Someone will take advantage? He already is! He is a freeloader!"

In a rare show of animation, Jade snarled and buried her face in her hands as Ortega gently patted her shoulder.

A childish huff escaped the young leader of the Hunters. She was overtired, unable to sleep during the time Feng went into merciful unconsciousness before cruel reality demanded he pay for the crimes against his liver.


"Did you hear about Kina's guest?"

"I heard he picked on Bronze's mate and tried to make her cry."

"That isn't even the worst. He told Lady Jade he'd only want to sleep with her if he was paid. To her face."

"Oh my god!"

"I know, right?"

"Oh my god, that's terrible..."

"He's terrible."

"How does Kina put up with him?"

"He pissed her off earlier. She won't say what he did, but it had to be bad. Kina's never mad. Ever."

"Wait, Kina was mad? Scary."

"Yeah, I saw her grab Arthur the second he got out of training, and she just dragged him right back into the training room. When his Trainer said he had reserved that room for the day, she actually snarled at him."

"Whoa."

"I'm half-expecting shit to go down now."

"I know, right?"

The gaggle of half a dozen females chattered as they walked through the hall.

"I wonder if she's mad because that Feng guy said she was unattractive, too. I mean, he seems to hate everyone. Why's he even here, anyway?"

"I dunno. Faida? Any ideas?"

"No way is he her mate, so not that..." The blonde named Faida answered. "He pissed off Rare last night, too. As soon as he got his first drink and it hit him, he turned into a super jerk."

"Oh my gosh! You were there for that?"

"Uh huh. He was spouting off about how he didn't want any of the water she was trying to get him to drink. She didn't want him to get hung over. I kinda hope he is after he was mean to poor Rare!"

"Oh wait, that was him? It hit him like he was a Hunter just discovering his drink. Oof!"
 
It was quite astonishing what one could accidentally hear while walking through the corridor. Feng stopped in the corridor he was walking through as he heard girls chattering about Kina's guest in the corridor he was close to turning into.

When had he ever tried to make anyone cry? He didn't waste effort on trying. If it happened, it happened, but he never tried to make it happen. And he never told that annoying woman that he would sleep with her if he was paid, he was only supposed to seduce her, last time he checked that didn't equal sex. Though he couldn't deny it might have ended that way anyways.

Eventually, he got kind of tired of their talking and they might just discover him soon anyways as they were almost gonna turn around the corner anyways. He took a step out and stopped for a second, then smiled brightly at the girls.

"You know, if you have questions, you could just ask the people involved instead of spreading rumors. It goes so much faster than to throw ideas back and forth without knowing the whole story. I'm only here so Kina can kill me. Just ask her to be faster about it and you'll get rid of me in no time." His smile faded and he yawned, looking as bored as ever as he started to walk past them. Teenage girls were so annoying.

"If those two were so bothered by a jerk like me calling them unattractive, when I don't see any woman as attractive, then wouldn't the problem lie more with their self-esteem rather than my behavior?" He said loud enough for them to hear as he walked away. "Or maybe that just mean you think they are so weak minded that they'd be affected by a few words from a jerk. Doesn't seem like you're thinking much of them after all." He started to whistle a happy tune as he continued strolling down the corridor. Clearly he didn't care what some teenage (looking) girls said about him.
 
"As if we'd ask you," one of them sneered, clearly unashamed that he overheard them. "Asshole."

"Gross, he's a queer!" another giggled, only to get swatted by a pastel-colored book.

Faida huffed. "Hey! Bear's gay. Is Bear gross?"

The second flushed, then looked away. "No, but he's..."

"Stoppit, ok?" Faida shook her head, then glanced toward Feng before she whispered to the group. Giggles erupted.

"That makes so much sense!"

"Hey, Feng, I think Alsoome has a tea for that!"

"They make pills for that!"

Faida laughed. "Guys, stoppit! I didn't mean like thaaaat!"

"What, like... dogs?"

"Omigawd, no!"

"Woof woof!" A chorus of barking ensued, interrupted by laughter as the girls began to pick on Faida, and the pastel-clad female laughed, goal accomplished—the heat was off Feng.
 
He wasn't sure how they thought that he was automatically gay just because he wasn't attracted to girls, but whatever, the heat seemed to be off of him. He hadn't expected it since he hadn't tried to get them to stop picking on him, but if it made his day calmer, he wouldn't complain.

Feng thought for a while about what he should do. The bar was a definite no, not so much because he couldn't afford it, but because he knew the rumors probably was worst there and it was hard to act fools be fools when they were fools towards him. Computer room... No, those things were ancient. Without a good upgrade, he wouldn't touch those things.

After having run through the few options he knew, kitchen, room, computer room and bar, he decided to just go outside to one of the yards. Could as well do some meditation as he used to when he lived with the monks. It would calm him down, and maybe he wouldn't feel like beating the shit out of that annoying woman the next time he saw her. So he walked towards the closest courtyard. At least until something entirely different stopped him in his tracks.

"Hey mister suicide, haven't seen you in a while. Watcha up to?" Feng asked as he stopped beside Drake who seemed to be looking at some bulletin board with a lot of papers put onto it. Between Kina and Drake, this guy was definitely his favorite. Not that that said a lot.
 
Drake initially didn't realize Feng meant him, but after a moment, he turned to look at him. "Please refrain from calling me that while we're here. People on Headquarters tend to take such things badly."

He moved on from that, though, to answer Feng's question.

"I'm just trying to find a mission. It should have at least eight stars or a skull and crossbones on it." He offered no explanation of why, mostly because he didn't think it mattered to Feng, and he wasn't trying to elicit the other man's help. No—he was just answering the question.

"You?" He turned toward Feng, ready to listen, should the man actually have a serious answer rather than the sort he honestly expected.

The rumor mill was alive today with Feng's name, and it wasn't pretty. Not really his business—he just assumed it would keep Kina busy.
 
"Oh you know, trying to keep a low profile and failing. The fangirls are so obsessed." Of course he didn't mean his fangirls, even though it could be interpreted that way. "Have barely been here for a day and already feel like shooting my brains out. Not that it would help."

He turned to the board and looked around at the papers. "Sounds like you're searching for danger. Bet you won't take little miss China with you. Mind if I tag along? I promise I won't help you if you get into trouble." Feng said as he took down a piece of paper with a skull and crossbones on it which he then handed to the other man.

He remembered their first meeting clearly, how Drake wanted to be killed honorably, which he had been criticized for by the immortal, and how he had acted when Kina talked about all three of them taking on some level one missions together. This man didn't seem to want Kina with him. Clearly, Feng himself also wanted to get away from her for a bit, or maybe just that place in general. He definitely needed a break from that woman, she exhausted him at this point. Why he didn't just ask them to open a portal so he could go back to his own world for a while was a bit of a mystery even to him. Maybe his world just didn't seem exciting enough for him anymore. Not that it had been for quite a while.
 
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