In the Grasp Of the Enemy W/Icystorm

Eddie rolled herself down the hallway to the entrance of the cafeteria nodding a greeting to Seth as she turned into the mess hall. She glanced up at him as they got in line to get food, today she was getting chicken cordon blue and some broccoli and carrots. Honestly Eddie just ate for sustenance now nothing really tasted good to her anymore. Eddie told Eddie what she wanted since he normally got two plates on his tray and went to get them drinks from the cooler. She picked out a large bottle of water for both of them, sat them on her lap, and went to their normal table.

After putting the water up and situating her chair she locked it and leaned back resting as she waited for Seth to come.

"Seems like you've had a good day." she commented quietly when Seth came over sh etook her plate and set it down before bowing her head and muttering a very lackluster prayer to herself and barely putting the effort into crossing herself. When she was done she started to cut her food up,

"What'd you do?" Eddie asked politely.
 
Seth grabbed a tray, and once Eddie told him what she wanted, he got in line and waited. Some days he had to wait for other people to get food, and this was one of those days, but soon he was where he needed to be and gathered up two plates of the cordon blue and vegetables, then made for the table he and Eddie had claimed as theirs. As he passed the soup, he snatched a packet of crackers out of the little basket. Saltine crackers were his favorite food, and in the past they had been all he had available to eat some nights, so now he had a great fondness for them.

Sitting down, he gave a small smile at the comment Eddie gave and then waited for her to get done with her prayer. "Mainly just little things like change light bulbs, take out trash, and also helped clean up after the kids left. There wasn't much to do today, but it was still nice being there." He looked down at his food with a smile, but the smile slowly dropped since he decided to just bring it up now.

"Eddie.." He picked at his food with his fork for a few seconds before looking up at her. "What's wrong? And don't tell me nothing. You haven't been happy at all lately."
 
Eddie listened to him talk about his day. She was glad he'd had a good day at least one of them had. When his face dropped she started to feel worried, what was he going to ask? What did he have to say? She didn't really want to address any serious issues right now because she felt like it would just spiral her attitude down more.

"What's wrong? And don't tell me nothing. You haven't been happy at all lately." Seth asked. Eddie pressed her lips together and pushed her now cut up chicken around her plate. She frowned and shrugged,

"I don't honestly know..." she muttered honestly. "My brain is just screwed." Eddie explained in a dejected voice, "Can't sleep really....keep freaking out at little things...it's freaking sucky." she finished shrugging. The young former sailor nibbled unethusiasticaly at her chicken pretty much eating because she knew she needed the calories not because she was hungry.
 
Seth set his fork down and ignored his food as he thought about what he had just been told. While it explained a few things, it left him with more questions than answers. Did she honestly not know or have much of an idea? In what ways was her brain screwed up? Why was she freaking out at little things? Was it because of all they went through? He didn't feel screwed up from that, but he had never followed societal norms, including with mental issues.

Brow furrowed, he spent a minute thinking and staring at the table before looking up at Eddie, concern evident in his eyes. Without thinking, he reached out and took one of her hands in both of his. "Are you sure you don't know?" Being a medic she had to have some sort of idea, right? "I don't like seeing you like this. Is there anything I can do to help make things better?" He hated the mood she had been in. It hurt to see.

Looking down, he finally realized his hands were holding hers, and he nervously pulled them away and set his hands in his lap. "Sorry.." Now he worried he had made her uncomfortable. Keeping his eyes downcast, he spoke quietly. "I just want you to be happy."
 
Eddie looked up at Seth when he took her hands and sighed quietly in an almost frustrated way,

"Seth..." she muttered running her hand through her hair and sticking it up on end, she avoided showering which meant sometimes her hair cut a bit greasy and stiff, "I told I don't freaking know...nothing makes sense." she muttered. Eddie stared at her plate resting her forehead in her palm her finger intertwined in her hair,

"I just...I can't sleep or do like think straight and it's really screwing with...life...I don't know...I can't do basic life things..." she muteered, her mind was jumping everywhere and she couldn't see to get a coherent thought out without stumbling. Eddie had always had focus problems, a few teachers had suggested she had ADHD, but nothing had been diagnosed. She'd been able to focus herself and learn how to handle it, but lately she'd been struggling again with attention problems. "Um..." Eddie started, "It's weird...can't even shower sometimes...it's freakin' weird...I can't..." she trailed off a little embarressed and unsure what to say.
 
Seth didn't like hearing that. If Eddie wasn't able to do simple things like shower at times, then something needed to change. Not only that, but she didn't even sound like she was doing well when she spoke. She knew more about medical than he did, so what could he do? There wasn't a whole lot. He certainly couldn't help her while she was here, but would he even be able to help her if she were anywhere else? God, he didn't know, but there would be change, because that was better than nothing.

"I don't think you should stay here anymore. You need to go out and do things and feel human again. You can st--" He was about to say stay with him, but that couldn't happen yet. He planned on getting a place as soon as he had a bit of money saved up, but for now he was still on the streets. If need be, he could try to get one sooner than planned. He could even talk to his boss and see if she could help, he would work more if she would allow. It wasn't a great plan, but it was something.

"You could maybe stay with me.."
 
Eddie looked up at Seth. She could tell he was worried about her and felt bad about worrying him so. She probably should've just kept her mouth shut now she'd shared a problem she had no answer for. She'd just burden him something she didn't even have an idea on wher eto start fixing. She listened to him speak and nodded slightly.

"Yeah...definently need to get out of here...I-I don't wanna freakin' be a quitter, but I do this this way anymore. The nurses always poking in...there's no privacy...I'm just a freakin' number on a chart." She muttered. She realized in the past few minutes she'd said freakin' way too many times.

"Are you sure you'd want me to stay with you? No exactly a cheery person at the moment. I don't want to be a free loader...I'll look for a job and such. Don't know what I can do, but I'll figure it out." Eddie promised. Her thoughts were super scattered which made her speech less then understandable because of how the words and thoughts came out jumbled.

"I don't even know how to go about checking out...can I just ask a nurse? Can i leave today? Do I have to be cleared....there's so much to do...I should go get started." Eddie said pushing her chair back. She'd barely eaten anything, but didn't feel all that hungry anyway.
 
Seth could understand where Eddie was coming from, sort of. Maybe understand was not the best word, with how she was jumping around with her words, but he understood most of what she was trying to say. She hated it here, liked the idea of getting out of this place, and wanted to leave right away, which was a problem.

Before she could stand up, he reached out a hand and grabbed her arm. "Wait." He paused for a few seconds in order to collect his thoughts before speaking again. "Don't feel the need to rush. You have a few days to get ready and prepare since I don't have a place for you to stay yet." And he wasn't going to let her sleep on the streets with him. The abandoned building was fine for him, it felt a bit like home, but it was not ok for her to sleep somewhere like that.

"Just give me a few days to find a place to live. I will talk to my boss and try to figure something out." Seth released Eddie's arm, hoping that would be enough to get her to not rush while also reassuring her. Although, now that he replayed his words in his head, it didn't sound all that reassuring. He didn't mind if she was not in a good mood often or didn't have a job, but he did worry that he was making a promise he would be unable to keep.
 
"I thought...I thought you had a place...Where have you been staying?" Eddie asked worried as she stopped moving her chair back. She suddenly was very worried that Seth was living on the streets again or somewhere unsafe. "I'll help pay for the place...I have money saved up...I can help...I'm not a free-loader..." she insisted. Eddie didn't want to be a free-loader, she didn't want Seth spending all his money on a place. and she didn't want him to feel like he needed to 'rescue' her. She looked up at him her eyes showing she was worried about him which for now covered over the anxiety and depression that normally showed in them. It wasn't totally gone, but for now was hidden by her genuine concern for Seth's health and safety.

"I'll wait a couple days...search for a job in the meantime...hopefully I can get something pretty quickly. My brother has my truck he can bring it up during the weekend..." Eddie explained. Even though it was a coherent sentences her thought still seemed scattered and uncontrolled.
 
Seeing that look in Eddie's eyes, Seth took a deep breath and tried to find the best way to voice his thoughts since he didn't want her to worry about him too much. "I didn't want to stay at any of the shelters so I've been sleeping in an empty house I found. I like it, it smells like home, so there is no need to worry about me." Although, except for the smell, it wasn't home. What he wouldn't give to turn back time and go back to where everything was simple.

"I know you're not a free-loader, but I'd rather you keep the money you have saved up, keep it as emergency money or something." It was better she had something to fall back on in case anything bad happened. He himself was used to little or not money, so if he spent most of his paycheck on one thing than that was fine with him. He wasn't one for buying material possessions.

"Get a job when you can, more so because I think it will do you good more than needing money, and then we can go from there. Now why don't we finish eating?" He pulled his plate closer to him. He hadn't touched the food since they sat down, so he took a bite of the food that was now getting cold.
 
While it was better than being on the streets Eddie still didn't like the idea of Seth being a squatter. What if he was caught? If he was arrested they could possibly deport him! That idea terrified her. She didn't want to be alone here. Eddie listened to him and rolled forward poking at her cooling potatoes and chicken,

"No...no I'll help pay, Seth." Eddie insisted. She wasn't worried about not having a lot of money, growing up in a van with her whole family had taught her possessions and even a house were unneeded. This life style however had taught her independance. From the time she was old enough she was walking dogs, doing yard work and other odd chores to earn a little money for her family. Her pride wouldn't let her just sit back and have someone else take care of her.

"You don't have to worry about me not having enough money...I can live on very little...." Eddie reassured him as she forced herself to eat the potatoes, "I just...I need out...don't care how big...what part of town....don't care about anything like that" she promised him desperate to not have to stay in the hospital over the holidays. "You...you can find a place...whatever is best for you... I'll call my brother get my truck up here and start looking for a job." Eddie conceded.
 
Seth continued to eat while Eddie spoke, and a small, almost sad smile came to his face at the thought her words created. When it came to survival, the two of them were very similar. They did not need much of anything to continue to live, although that depended on ones definition of living. Then in other ways, they were completely different. Eddie was adamant on getting a job, while he would not have one if it was not for her.

"Alright. I'll look around before work tomorrow, see what I can find that is available." She may not care where it was she was living, but he did not want her living in a dump, so he would do what he could to find a decent place for them to stay. Perhaps it was good that she had a bit of money saved up, or else this would have been extremely difficult.

As he continued to eat, other issues popped up. What would they do about furniture? Were there places that came already having beds and whatnot? If they did, they were probably more expensive. He was already sleeping on the ground, but with Eddie's leg, he did not want that for her. "What do we do about furniture? Like a bed and whatnot. You need one."
 
"I can get by without a bed...done it plenty of times...but if you think we need furniture there are places for cheap stuff..." Eddie explained. Honestly she didn't know if she could properly get sleep on the floor anymore. She couldn't sleep well on the hospital bed most of the time. Sometimes it felt like her body wouldn't stop aching or she couldn't get warm, sometimes it was her nightmares that kept her up.

"I think maybe GoodWill or Salvation Army have some? I dunno...My dad managed to furnish his house for real cheap.....really cheap....since they're still quiet a few of them it was nice..." Eddie explained her mind jumping tracks as she thought about it. She finished her food and wiped her face off before rolling her chair back,

"I have to go...I can research jobs and stuff at the recreation center....they have computers." Eddie said putting her tray on her lap and carefully starting to roll away. Now that she had her mind on something she wanted to accomplish which helped her mood a bit.
 
Seth gave a small nod of his head while at the same time making a mental note to check around for a Goodwill, Salvation Army, or any place that might have cheap furniture. A smile came to his face as he remembered a friend whose father owned a furniture store. The smile vanished when he then remembered what happened to that friend in the store. Best not to think about that.

Eddie's sudden need to leave and go do things caused him to blink in surprise, but at least it also pushed away whatever he had been thinking of. "Ok, yeah, alright." He called after her, although as he watched her roll away, he was unsure if she heard.

Staring down at his food, he was suddenly hit with the realization of all he would have to do. He would basically have to beg his boss for help. It had to be done, but he wasn't going to like it. He was a thief, not a beggar. Then there was figuring out what to do now. Heading 'home' and sleeping didn't sound too bad, but as he picked up his tray and made to leave, he decided to be productive and wander around to look for some stores.
 
Eddie spent the next few days applying and researching jobs in the area. She hadn't gotten many call backs though, which at first was extremely discouraging. The night before she was about to move out though she got a call back from the coffee shop and from the 911 operations center. She'd be working early morning at the coffee shop and would start her training as a 911 operator in the afternoons/evening. Eddie knew she wouldn't be earning a lot of money at first, but she had her savings and some money from the VA. Not a lot, which was weird to her, the way the VA calculated disability didn't make sense, but she wasn't going to complain. She wasn't a charity case.

After getting off the phone with her new employers, she'd had to take her phone back from Seth for a time so she could be contacted, Eddie was packing up the bed of her truck. She didn't have much a duffel bag of civilian clothes and her odd and ends in it, a garment bag with her uniforms in it, a bag with some military stuff that she hadn't been able to turn in, and the newest item was a shadow box with an American flag in it and couple items like her rank and ribbon board. Her old command had delivered it to her the day after Seth had suggest she leave the hospital.

Carefully putting her garment bag and shadow box in the actual truck and threw the rest in the bed of the truck. Putting the tailgate down she pulled herself into the truck bed and arranged a tarp and some tie downs over her stuff. She was supposed to leave early tomorrow so she didn't want to pack out then, but she also didn't want her things to get wet if it rained.

Getting back in her chair Eddie turned to wheel back inside. Seth was supposed to come today for dinner. She was going to tell him about her job search luck and see how finding an apartment or loft had gone. Eddie told him finding a little loft over a business might be the best. Those tended to be cheap and she figured they could survive a one room together.
 
The next few days were nothing but stress filled. First there was talking to his boss and revealing that he needed help because he had no place to live -no place he would let Eddie stay at least. At first it did not go too well, with a lot of back and forth then heart to heart conversation, or at least he had to speak his heart and a lot of what he was ashamed to admit. In the end, she took pity on him and loaned him the money, but he would have to work extra hours to pay it off. That, he was ok with.

Next there was searching for and securing a place to live. It wasn't hard, but for someone who had never done anything of the sorts before, it took its toll, especially in the learning department. Thankfully, during the talk with his boss, she had told him what to expect, so that helped a little. He ended up getting a loft like Eddie suggested, and the living quarters were above a few small stores, but those he paid no attention to. It was odd enough knowing he was going to be living above places he normally would have stole from, he didn't need to extra reminder from delving too deep into what those places really were.

Lastly, and most certainly the worst in terms of stress, was the realization that Eddie would be living with him..in a place that he -they? he wasn't really sure whose place to consider it- was now paying for. He would be staying in a home with someone, and that sent his stomach rolling. It wasn't that he didn't want to help her out in any way he could, but the reminders of his past were almost too much to handle. People who got too close to him ended up hurt. No, that wasn't right, they ended up dead. Fear nearly made him run, because running away was always easier.

It was now the night before Eddie was suppose to move in. He had just gotten done bringing a mattress into the loft. There was a small flight of stairs that led up to a little room that could hold a bed and not much else, so that is where he put it. He figured Eddie could sleep up there while he slept, well, anywhere else. It was the only furniture currently in their little space of living, but he would try to get more soon.

Taking a deep breath, he put on a mask of happiness and stepped inside the building, quickly making his way to the cafeteria where he was to meet Eddie. He couldn't say he was exactly hungry though. His appetite the last few days was less than it usually was.
 
Eddie met Seth outside the cafeteria. He looked happy...ish. She was never sure with him. Sometimes he seemed depressed and ready to run sometimes he seemed happy. It was difficult for Eddie to read him most of the time.

"Hey Seth." she greeted, "I finally got some call-backs for employers." she told him. She rolled behind him to get food. She was worried about leaving the hospital. It wasn't so much having a job and balancing bills, she done that before, but she was anxious about how she would handle just living outside of the military. RIght after highschool she'd enlisted and had never really had a normal go-to-work-come-back-to-a-roommate kind of life. Plus despite getting out of the hospital she'd still be far from her family and probably not able to take a lot of time to go see them. She'd always had some family with her or military buddies. Even when she was in foster care for a bit she'd had her brothers and in the Navy she'd had her unit. Now she just had self and had been struggling with feeling a lone which didn't help her building depression.
 
"Hey. That is good news. You will have to tell me about it while we eat." He preferred when she did the most talking. It was nice to have something to focus on that were not his own thoughts, and he also hoped that having her talk about getting calls about jobs would make her happy. He never knew how she felt unless she told him since he failed at reading other people.

Making his way through the cafeteria, he put some food for himself on a tray and grabbed what Eddie told him she wanted, putting it on the same tray next to his. Once he had everything, he walked to their usual table and set the food down. He didn't touch his food, instead looking at her while keeping his happy expression. "So, who did you get call-backs from?"
 
Seth seemed a bit off. He was always a bit off, like he didn't quite know how to control or vent his emotions, but today he seemed more off than normal. Tired, stressed probably. At least that's what Eddie guessed. She took the same food as he had, not really caring and wheeled to their normal table. Eddie paused and said a quick prayer crossing herself at the end. She'd been trying to keep up with services and everything, it was just hard when she had no motivation or always felt tired,

"Um from the coffee company and the 9-1-1 dispatch center. I'll be starting work at the cofee center and evening training to be a dispatcher. Then in a few months I might be able to start full time as a dispatcher." Eddie explained. She ate her food slowly not caring to taste. She was excited and anxious about leaving the hospital. She wanted to restart her life, try and get back on her feet...well foot...again. Somedays though it felt like her mind wouldn't like Kazakhstan. Whether it was eing captured or just the two years of deployment with almost constant fighting especially for her unit. It was hard being expected to be able to mentally transfer easily. It felt like she was failing because she couldn't.
 
Seth waited patiently while Eddie did her prayer. Ever since that day he asked her about it, the tried not to think about it too much. He didn't think it would ever be anything he was going to do, but he didn't want to make a big deal about it and maker her feel like she could not pray before eating. She was a good person that deserved a god to watch over her, while he was not.

"That sounds great." It was good to hear she was going to have two jobs. That is just what she needed to keep her distracted. "I don't know what a dispatcher does, but just so long as you end up enjoying it then it is good." He wasn't sure about coffee, though. A lot of people seemed to enjoy it, but the kind he tried had been bitter. It wasn't terrible, but nothing beat water, so he could not understand why so many people drank the stuff. Deciding to not worry about it, he leaned back and continued to smile, wanting to feel happy for her.
 
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