Vigilance: Blood And Justice [OOC/Sign-Ups/Chat]

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I added some notes to my CS. That's right, I totally started designing a genetic code for a fictional people.
 
Wowza, that's some pretty deep stuff there. Very detailed indeed!
 
Hey Wraith the only thing I feel liek I might have a issue with is my Magni powers can you review them while I work on my biography tonight? I needed several other people to get some nice ideas for mine, because im generally unsure what to do on that part on most Character Sheets.
 
WanderingSpirit said:
Hey Wraith the only thing I feel liek I might have a issue with is my Magni powers can you review them while I work on my biography tonight? I needed several other people to get some nice ideas for mine, because im generally unsure what to do on that part on most Character Sheets.
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Alright well I'm going to give you some feedback on the sheet as a whole:
-First off, under age you have him appearing as '20' yet his backstory gives no justification why he only looks twenty. Especially being of an Adept skill I was under the impression he'd be somewhere between one hundred and two hundred years old. But from the sounds of it he's just a college student so there's definitely a conflict there.
-Again right in his powers you state he has immense power using what he's learned from a child to now but as I mentioned above we have no sense of how old his is. If he's only 20 then he's most likely a novice in magic and therefore all the powers are null and void as there's no way he's as powerful as you say.
-It's also highly unlikely for two Magni to work together against a common foe and even more unlikely for a Master Magni to allow an Adept to escape them especially considering there's two levels of potency difference. As stated in the 'STATS' part of the 'BACKGROUND INFORMATION', Magni numbers are going down every year "as the species continues to kill themselves off as their own thirst for power overrides their need to survive as a species."
-That actually brings us to my next point. Your CS mentions on a few occasions a 'Magni Community' which simply wouldn't exist for the above reasons. Additionally the way I read your CS, it implies that Markus has two Magni parents. There's a few problems with this, we have the above reasons and we also have this as stated in the OP: "Children with two Magni parents are more likely to be human than those who only have one, however the powers are guaranteed to pass on after both parents pass away triggering the change within the child."
-Not exactly sure where you're coming up with this 'Blood increasing the spell's strength' but the only way a Magni can increase their power levels is by ripping the shadow off of another Magni to increase their connection to Umbra and add that Magni's experience and lifeforce to their own.
-"Outside of this Magni stuff... likes working with runes." Except Runes, Potions, Alchemy and all that jazz are 'Magni Stuff'? I'm a bit confused about this portion.
-The applications are all good but in general I'm not sure you understand the concept of the Magni. Aside from everything mentioned above there's quite a few spelling mistakes throughout the CS and the sentence structure is often awkward and confusing. You may want to proof read it some more when you make the above edits.
 
Wraith darling, how gritty can we get with this Magni "dog-eat-dog" mentality you've generated? Because you know how fucked up my back stories can get. I'm thinking a tinge of family killing and possibly even a child death, there's the possibility of a literal blood bath due to a bout of insanity, but most likely not because for all my love of tragedy, I don't like needless melodrama.
 
Stein said:
Wraith darling, how gritty can we get with this Magni "dog-eat-dog" mentality you've generated? Because you know how fucked up my back stories can get. I'm thinking a tinge of family killing and possibly even a child death, there's the possibility of a literal blood bath due to a bout of insanity, but most likely not because for all my love of tragedy, I don't like needless melodrama.
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As downright gritty as you want. You can be any morality your heart desires! I'm sure there's a Magni out there who seduces men only to create a bunch of baby Magni to sustain her life force.

(Note I specifically use her as mentioned in the Background Info, the genetic traits that make a Magni are only transferable through the maternal genes. Sorry Daddy Magni! But knocking up human women isn't going to help you at all!)
 
Lord Wraith said:
As downright gritty as you want. You can be any morality your heart desires! I'm sure there's a Magni out there who seduces men only to create a bunch of baby Magni to sustain her life force.
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Oh, fuck.yes.

Also, I know I probably don't need to even draw attention to this, but I'm probably going to use my sample post and make it a scene from my back story. Like, I'll gloss over the part in my back story, but actually write out the scene in the sample post.
 
Lord Wraith said:
You Character Sheet Review
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...man I guess I have to add some more dirt onto my character. Only question I have again is, that if my character have two Magni parents does that mean he doesn't have his powers until they are killed? Or dead?
 
WanderingSpirit said:
...man I guess I have to add some more dirt onto my character. Only question I have again is, that if my character have two Magni parents does that mean he doesn't have his powers until they are killed? Or dead?
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Pretty much, at least one parent would need to be dead. And his parents wouldn't likely be living together due to the nature of relationships between Magni. Likely would have been a 'hit and quit it' situation.
 
Hmmmm okay then I think, It would be easier to scrap what I have now for my history and start a new one with the suggestions you gave me, so off I go!
 
@Stein and @WanderingSpirit

I added some updates to the Magni ranks to give some brief guidelines as to how old most Magni are when reaching the specific ranks. Give them a look over please!
 
BASICS PROWESS EQUIPMENT DETAILS ADDITIONAL DETAILS NOTES ASSOCIATES
  • | NAME: |
    Jackson Dean Noble

    | ALIAS(ES): |
    Jack; JD
    Codename: Cyclone

    | PLACE OF BIRTH: |
    Hannis, Oregon, USA

    | SPECIES: |
    Homo Virium (Hyperhuman)

    | D.O.B.: |
    September 3rd

    | AGE: |
    Twenty-two

    | SEX: |
    Male

    | SEXUALITY: |
    Heterosexual

    | APPEARANCE: |
    Standing just an inch short of six feet, and weighing 189lbs, Jackson has a well-muscled, medium-build that has been toned from years of consistent exercise and intensive training. He is grey-eyed with dark brown hair that is constantly out-of-place, as if recently blown by a strong wind. The chain around his neck holds a pop-tab from a soda can which was a gift from a childhood friend.

    | CLASSIFICATION: |
    Neptune
  • | ABILITIES: |

    Jackson is an aerokinetic, meaning he has the ability to shape and manipulate air, and to a lesser extent even create it. Air is made up of various atmospheric gases, and Jackson can control it in a variety of ways by changing the pressure in the atmosphere. Jackson can purify the air, remove the oxygen from an area, or enrich the oxygen levels to achieve rusting effects. He is capable of summoning minor breezes, or even powerful hurricanes and tornadoes, and, because of the nature of wind, his attacks can be incredibly difficult to defend against.

    | APPLICATIONS: |

    • Generate Air - Jackson's body is unique, different from an ordinary human, in that he possesses a tiny sac in his body that produces air which he can expel through the pores in his body. The amount of air he produces each day is very minimal, but, coupled with his ability to increase the amount of air in the atmosphere, this minimal amount is more than enough to be useful.

    • Increase, Decrease, Shape, and Manipulate Air - Along with generating his own source of air, he can readily manipulate and control the already existing air and wind around him. It's easier for him to manipulate quicker, moving forms of wind than it is slow-moving, still air; it is because of this that he waves his hands and arms around in order to get the air around him moving more quickly.

    • Simulated Telekinesis - By manipulating the air around an object, Jackson can lift it, and move it as if he were using his own hands. This allows him fine control over distant or normally unreachable objects, as well as the use of brute 'strength' using the power of the wind. As such, he can redirect and deflect attacks, projectiles, etc. By surrounding his body in an invisible aura of dense, fast moving air Jackson can even simulate tactile-telekinesis and form a force-field to protect him from harm, to an extent.

    • Aerokinetic Attacks - He can manipulate wind in order to use attacks of various intensities in diverse and numerous ways, either projected as blasts, streams, waves, etc, or used to enhance his physical attacks via increasing the pressure and density of air around his body when striking. These attacks can be as mild as a gust of wind to knock someone over, or as devastating as a tempest capable of destroying a town, or even focused enough to erode solid rock.


    • Air Solidification, and Pressure Manipulation - An advanced ability Jackson spent years learning and honing in the H.E.A.T. program, by manipulating the molecules in the air he can increase or decrease the pressure in the atmosphere surrounding him, and even compress and harden the air into a solid mass allowing for constructs or more powerful concussive blasts/waves. By drastically increasing the pressure and compressing the air around an object, Jackson can crush it.
      • Flight - One of two basic-level usages of pressure manipulation. By decreasing the pressure of air in front of him, increasing it behind him, and manipulating the air around him, Jackson can achieve subsonic flight, levitation, and the ability to literally walk on air.
      • Jet Propulsion/Speed Boosts - The other basic-level usage. Much like with flight, by increasing and decreasing the pressure behind and ahead of him Jackson can enhance his speed and jumping capabilities, boosting him forward in any direction. Alternatively, he can propel other objects forward at high-speeds for offensive purposes.

    • Airwave Manipulation - By controlling the subtle vibrations in the air, Jackson can enhance his sense of touch and hearing by amplifying the vibrations in order to detect any disturbances, differences, and sounds that are usually too far out of range or minute to discern. With concentration, he can even amplify (through increased vibrations) or nullify (through reducing/eliminating vibration) sound in an area.

    • Electricity Generation - By manipulating air molecules to create ionization, he can produce electrostatic energy.



    | SKILLS: |

    Jackson, through years training in the H.E.A.T. program, has become quite adept at hand-to-hand combat and self-defense. While not a master martial artist by any means, he is quite capable of handling his own in a fight with or without the use of his abilities. Also while at P.R.C.U., Jackson took several meteorological courses to better utilize his manipulation of the atmosphere. Due to his time as a team leader he has become well-versed in tactics and strategy, developing exceptional leadership abilities.


    | LIMITATIONS: |

    While Jackson has a wide-range range of superhuman abilities due to his versatile power, many of his more powerful ones - such as summoning huge tornadoes - take a lot of concentration, and can exhaust him or put strain on his body. Although he can ionize the air to create electricity, Jackson has no control over it, and doing so haphazardly could result in serious harm to himself and others. It is incredibly difficult for him to solidify air into constructs other than basic shapes, it being the only real technique that has eluded his mastery, and it is essentially useless in the heat of battle where he would be unable to focus for long enough to form anything properly.


    | WEAKNESSES: |

    Despite his vast capabilities, Jackson is just as fragile as any other human being, regardless of his hype status; he is vulnerable to harm if unable to defend himself. The concentration it takes to perform powerful attacks can be exploited by opponents, and if he exhausts himself too much by overusing his abilities he could pass out from the strain.

  • | WEAPONS: |
    None currently.

    | TOOLS: |
    He carries on him at all times his cellphone, and a zippo lighter. He will prepare the necessary tools in advance if needed.

    | ATTIRE: |
    Jackson wears no special attire to conceal his identity, but does have a light, black jacket to shield himself from windchill while flying.
  • | BACKSTORY: |

    Born to Scott and Charlotte Noble in small town Oregon, Jackson and his father would relocate to Crescent City, California just a short year after his birth when Charlotte abandoned the family for her own selfish reasons, and chose a nice little home in the New Lillith district near his sister, Feona - a student at Faulkner Institute for Higher Learning - who would help Scott to raise his son. An aspiring writer, Scott would eventually go on to write his first successful novel, and later book series, which shot him to instant fame, and allowing him to provide a stable life for his son.

    Jackson would grow up having a fairly normal life, despite his father's fame, with his aunt, now a rookie in the police department, taking over the role of his absent mother. He would attend school, get in trouble, and make friends. At the age of nine, Jackson would meet who would become his best friend; Violet Young, his new next door neighbor. Although a little younger than him, Violet was a tomboy who took to becoming Jackson's shadow, with the two soon becoming inseparable.

    Not long after Jackson turned thirteen his hype-gene kicked in, activating his abilities, and causing several incidents and minor injuries to himself and his father. The Nobles tried to hide and keep his powers suppressed, but after a year ripe with more incidents it was decided that it would be best for Jackson to go to Canada in order to enroll in the Pacific Royal Collegiate and University, an academic community for hyper-humans to learn to control and harness their abilities for the good of all, as well as a very high-caliber educational facility. Before he left, Jackson, now fourteen, and a twelve year-old Violet sat down to discuss what it would mean for their friendship with him going off to a boarding school. During their conversation, and amid the many promises that they would write one another, the two shared one last can of coke together, a tradition of sorts they would do every time they hung out, and declared that they would always be friends. To cement this sentiment, Jackson removed the pop tab from the soda can and told Violet that he would keep it with him forever as a reminder of her and their friendship.

    Life at Pacific Royal went by quickly for Jackson. His first year there was a learning experience, but he quickly hit his stride, dedicating himself to mastering his hype abilities. He even enrolled in the Hyperhuman Education & Advanced Training Program (H.E.A.T.) to better hone his skills in order to one day become a S.H.I.F.T. agent and help others with his powers as a way to make his aunt proud, as she had raised him to be an upstanding young man who aided others in need. By his fourth year at P.R.C.U. Jackson, 18, was made leader of his unit, Team 33, AKA Echo squad, where he received the codename "Cyclone" from his squad-mates, and eventually led his team to victory in several of the school competitions. It was also around this time that his father, Scott, sadly passed away while traveling for research, leaving Feona as his only remaining family.

    Jackson, now in his final year at P.R.C.U., has been growing worried after hearing the constant reports about his city under siege of natural disaster, and now the recent news stories detailing the growing unrest and near-rioting has him concerned enough for the city and those in it that he has left the campus, without permission, and is traveling towards the coastal city in order to do his best in restoring order.


  • | SAMPLE POST: |




  • | SUPPORTING CAST: |

    Noble, Feona Young, Violet Savage, Chris Noble, Scott
    • | NAME: |

      Feona Laura Noble

      | SUMMARY: |

      Jackson's aunt, and mother-figure. After Jackson's father moved to Crescent City when his wife left him, Feona helped her brother raise her baby nephew, despite her own inexperience with children, and eventually instilled in him the same morals and belief in standing up for what's right that she herself had. She lives in New Lillith, working as a detective on the police force, and tends to dedicate herself to her work causing her social life to be lacking.







    • | NAME: |

      Violet "Vi" Mackenzie Young

      | SUMMARY: |

      Violet is a childhood friend of Jackson's, the two having been inseperable until the age of fourteen when he went off to attend Pacific Royal Collegiate and University. Nearly two whole years younger than Jackson, she harbored a crush on him in their youth, and, although she tries suppress them, she often still has thoughts of him. After he left for PRCU in Canada, Violet only got to see him several times a year during holiday, briefly, and a few weeks in the Summer, along with the occasional letter and e-mail. The funeral of Scott Noble, Jackson's father, was the last time Violet saw him as Jackson has largely stayed away from Crescent City since. She has been attending university in the city for over two years now, and is currently volunteering at relief centers throughout New Lillith in the wake of the city's flooding.
    • | NAME: |

      Christopher Henry Savage

      | SUMMARY: |

      Christopher met Violet his senior year in college, and the two, after having spent months as good friends, have been dating for nearly a year. He is a dedicated young man; both an athlete excelling in physical activities - including soccer, for which he was the varsity captain at his university, and several martial arts - and an intelligent student who maintained focus on his academic studies. Chris, after graduating from university two years ago, has been working construction in order to pay off his student loans before he plans to enroll in the Crescent City Police Academy. He is currently assisting Violet in her volunteer relief work in order to keep an eye on her during these dangerous times, as well as aid his city in need.
    • | NAME: |

      Scott Gregory Noble

      | SUMMARY: |

      Jackson's late father. He was well-respected and loved by his son and sister, and the many fans of his various fictional novels that he had written throughout the last decade-and-a-half. He had been researching legends and myths of magical beings for his new book, Shadows, even interviewing those who had claimed to know of real-life sorcerors called Magi, when he tragically suffered a heart attack and passed away.






  • | [CHARACTER NAME] | [IMPRESSION] | [RELATIONSHIP] | [BRIEF SUMMARY OF RELATIONSHIP] |
 
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Apologies if I haven't finished my CS within the previous day as promised. It should be done after a few hours or so.
 
I'll get the character sheet for Emma up and running soon, hopefully today, I prefer to post it online completely in one go ^-^ It just takes a little longer that way.

Anyone any ideas on what kind of internship someone could do? Someone that is kind of forgetful, a little ditzy, doesn't like to sit still, average in combat, the greatest backpack you've ever had, and associated with H.E.L.P. as she went to the school in Canada that was set up by them for HYPE people.
No one? yeah same here XD haha. I'll figure it out. (I'll probably just go with exchange student instead, saves on breaking my head over it haha)

There was something else I wanted to say/ask but now I forgot, oh well, I'll remember it at some point no doubt, if it was important.
 
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