"Oh greatest of all joys, the goddamn hippie van," I quip as I follow Sarah over to the electric-powered vehicle, "Nothing like preserving an environment that's already fucked. I'm sure the biters really appreciate our attempts to not destroy the ozone layer. They're big on that sort of thing, I hear."
Smirking slightly, I watch as the rest of the scavenging team begins to emerge. There's Jason, rocking a fucking katana of all things and muttering about how he wants something that does more damage. Hard man to please, clearly. Over at the other car is psycho-girl; Ivy, I think her name is, a newer arrival at our own little slice of apocalyptic paradise with a flair for the killing of things. She's got the tattooed fellow, Martin, in her car, along with that keen one named for a day of the week (can't remember off the top of my head which).
Our little team begins to drift off to entertain themselves for the next two hours, but Martin and Jason remain nearby for a charming little chat about the proper process of zombie slaughter. My smile only grows wider as I listen in.
"You guys are gonna get yourselves killed with that kinda attitude. You do realise this, right?" I take a few steps towards them, using the point of my hammer to try and pick out the dirt from under my fingernails absent-mindedly. "Sure, zombies are all slow and shit. Sure, they have the same collective capacity for rational thought as a monkey that fell out the fucktard tree and hit all the branches on the way down." My snap my eyes up to look at both of them.
"But it just takes one bite, one little scratch, and suddenly you've been dealt a one-way ticket to Bitersville. No backsies, no cures, just the very fucking painful and slow process of watching yourself erode into a mindless, shuffling corpse that likes to eat folks." I smile my sardonic little smile. "Entirely up to you, though. Fancy playing hero like ol' Timmy? Go right ahead. I'm sure as shit not gonna be saving your asses, though. I like breathing."
Sniffing briefly and sliding the hammer back into my belt, I wander off from the pair of would-be zombie slayers towards the barn. Might as well catch an hour or two of rack time before we get this show on the road...