Murder Tale VI: Space Jam [Non-Canon]

[Gwazi Magnum]

"S-So, um...sorry for snapping at you guys...all the violence and aggression isn't really my thing," she mentioned jokingly, giving a meek smile, "My name's Fluttershy. And this wittle cutesy-wutesy is Angel Bunny." ​

"And I'm Terry Crews! Don't worry about being violent though, nothing can harm these muscles!".

@Archmage Jeremiah @The Great Detective @Bomb @The Tactician @Kaykay
​

Tomoyo Sakagami
@Crow @Kaykay @Archmage Jeremiah @The Great Detective @Bomb @The Silver Paladin @Anyone Really

Tomoyo's efforts to find a basketball turned out to be in vain, and she was doubtfull she had anywhere in this basketball court left to search.

"Strange... A basketball court, doesn't have basketballs..." Tomoyo murmured, she looked a little disappointed really, but, eventually, she turned her attention away from the search, and towards the strange shennanigans going on with producer and his "company" of sorts... She didn't directly speak to any of them, but, nonetheless, she watched, intrigued to see just how crazy things would get, and, well... If she would have to break up a fight or something.​

"Others popped all the basketballs." Motoko said. "They fought earlier, and several of them got popped."

Motoko thought the girl seemed out of place in this weird-ass lineup, plus she was getting bored of watching, so she decided to talk to this girl.

Then over hearing this other conversation a can of Old Spice immediately flew over to their location.
Floating in the air another Terry Crews head popped out from the top and exclaimed "Popped Basketballs? Well that's not going to work for an Athletic Old Spice Ad... I know! I can fix them!".

Followed by a loud but harmless explosion between the group brought to you by commerical effects once the smoke cleared there was now a fully inflated and working basketball.

@york @Crow @Kaykay @Archmage Jeremiah @The Great Detective @Bomb @The Silver Paladin​

 

[DapperDogman]

As Wild Dog would be eating the chips, a Terry Crews would suddenly pop out of it and exclaim "It's more than just Spray! It's also Body wash and a variety of Male Hygiene products! All to give you more Body Odour blocking power!".

@The Tactician @DapperDogman
​

"Hmmm...Impressive stuff indeed" he murmurs, nodding slightly "I'm sure when I get back to my world, and I get into the Football scene again, I could have you guys sponsor me, right? You know how athletes advertise different brands"


"So...You guys are like, both mascots for the brand?"

He continues munching on his chips quietly, avoiding eating the mini Terry

@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"Hmmm...Impressive stuff indeed" he murmurs, nodding slightly "I'm sure when I get back to my world, and I get into the Football scene again, I could have you guys sponsor me, right? You know how athletes advertise different brands"


"So...You guys are like, both mascots for the brand?"

He continues munching on his chips quietly, avoiding eating the mini Terry

@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

"Hm... Well the only way to Sponsor you would be if you harnessed the power of Old Spice. For we only Sponsor people with Power!".

Terry Crews claimed, meanwhile the little terry in the bag of chips poofed into smoke.

@The Tactician @DapperDogman​

 

[DapperDogman]

"Hm... Well the only way to Sponsor you would be if you harnessed the power of Old Spice. For we only Sponsor people with Power!".

Terry Crews claimed, meanwhile the little terry in the bag of chips poofed into smoke.

@The Tactician @DapperDogman​

"Did I ever tell you about the time I gave the whole Suicide Squad a run for their money?"

"New name, new outfit" he murmurs, wobbling his hand from side to side

"But yeah, I gave their whole little squad quite a fight, would you say I have power?" he smirks slightly and slips the mask back down, finished with his chips

"Cause I tell ya, those guys are serious business"

@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

 

[C.T.]

Noise.

So much fucking noise.

God if they don't shut the fuck up, I'll give single one of them extra assh-Urk...

Rising from a lying on one of the bleachers, Eda Blackwater, gripping her throbbing head, looked down at the gym floor below and then at the stands around her to see the colorful cast she was now stuck with.
"Christ I got fucked up."
She groaned, trying to retrace her steps from the other night.
"Ok, left the church...went to the Yellow Flag...vodka, whisky, whisky rum...maybe I fucked around? Then just knocking out on the bar."
The trail went cold there, making the casually dressed "nun" groan in confused agony until she heard it.
The beautifully familiar sounds of a certain bitch's barking and gun firing.
Giggling and sighing in relief, Eda dropped down to gym floor, keeping a safe hold on her Glock 17L.

The irritable blonde walked up to the fighting pair of Revy and Roberta, letting out a shrill whistle to get her bestest pal's attention. Without getting involved in the fight 'cause fuck, she wasn't worth that.

"Oi! Revy, quit your usual bitching and explain what the fuck's happening! 'Cause last I checked, I didn't take no fucking Angel Dust and I just saw a fucking yellow horse! So either I'm at your family reunion or this is your fault as usual!" The wild woman nagged and nagged to her beloved friend.

"And why the fuck are you messing with the Termi-maid-tor? I swear to God if you put me through more shit that I already am, I'll fuck you up so bad that Romeo'll wake up in fear every time he dreams of you! Speaking of which..."
With a sudden grin and change of tone, Eda glanced around as she adjusted her tight shirt. If the squealing hog was around then that means the little Japanese boy would be close.

@Verite @TheSpringwoodSlasher @C.T.
​

Revy only shot the briefest of glances to the side at the whistle before returning her attention to Roberta...then her head snapped back up in a double take. "...Eda? What the fuck, you're here too??" Lagoon Company's gunslinger relaxed her grip on the maid's collar. "Me??? I didn't do shit, bitch! If this was a family reunion, which I don't even fucking do by the goddamn way, but if I did I sure as hell wouldn't have the maid on the guest list! This isn't my fault, either." She sniffed, wiping her nose free of blood again.

"Why? I hoped I could beat some answers out of her but she's just as clueless as I am. Now it's just fun." She grinned wide, an expression that quickly faded.

"Rock isn't here, you bitch. Even if he was, he ain't interested so just fuck off."
​

It didn't matter how he had got here the fact was he was laying face first on the floor grunting. "Mmm...Mathilda...what the shit-!"

The man known as Blacker Baron would get up from the floor with a freight looking around confused. Maybe that drinking bender wasn't the best thing to do...his spirits rose considerably though when he started to notice all the hot women around.

"Shieeeet, we gonna play some basketball? Fuck I'm up for that! Baron gonna show all of the fine bitches on the court how it's done! Speaking of which..."​

He'd turn towards Roberta and flash her a smile showing off his grill that spelled out 'Fuck You' on his teeth. "That sexy maid shit is just what the doctor ordered! Why don't come over here and bring ya friend to cause the Baron would love to get to know ya better, if ya know what I'm sayin'!"

@C.T. @TheSpringwoodSlasher @Everyone

"...You came to the fucking wrong place if you were looking for whores, motherfucker. If you wanna die, keep talking."

@TheSpringwoodSlasher @Jeremi @DBZ7​

 

[Jeremi]

Revy only shot the briefest of glances to the side at the whistle before returning her attention to Roberta...then her head snapped back up in a double take. "...Eda? What the fuck, you're here too??" Lagoon Company's gunslinger relaxed her grip on the maid's collar. "Me??? I didn't do shit, bitch! If this was a family reunion, which I don't even fucking do by the goddamn way, but if I did I sure as hell wouldn't have the maid on the guest list! This isn't my fault, either." She sniffed, wiping her nose free of blood again.

"Why? I hoped I could beat some answers out of her but she's just as clueless as I am. Now it's just fun." She grinned wide, an expression that quickly faded.

"Rock isn't here, you bitch. Even if he was, he ain't interested so just fuck off."
​

"...You came to the fucking wrong place if you were looking for whores, motherfucker. If you wanna die, keep talking."

@TheSpringwoodSlasher @Jeremi @DBZ7​

Another grin towards the outspoken woman. "Shiiiieeeeeet! Nah girl, it ain't like that. But later I can show ya some positions, for you know...the basketball and shit."

As he spoke he'd continually asses her...ahem...assets. "So what's your name girl? I'm Blacker Baron, your favorite pimps, favorite pimps pimp!"

@TheSpringwoodSlasher @C.T. @DBZ7

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"Did I ever tell you about the time I gave the whole Suicide Squad a run for their money?"

"New name, new outfit" he murmurs, wobbling his hand from side to side

"But yeah, I gave their whole little squad quite a fight, would you say I have power?" he smirks slightly and slips the mask back down, finished with his chips

"Cause I tell ya, those guys are serious business"

@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

"Hmm... Well that is powerful! But not as powerful you can be with Old Spi..." suddenly Terry was cut off, with the room going pitch black.
Only for it to turn back on after a few seconds where Terry continued "Sorry about that. Old Spice decided it wanted to turn off the Sun".

@The Tactician @DapperDogman​

 

[Midnight Maiden]

"Eh, kids will play with anything. Don't worry, missy. I'm sure someone will explain the rules of the game or something," Emalf assured the young woman. "Shoot me if you can't find another person who dunno what basketball is." If one person didn't, surely there would be more, considering how many people were here. Even animals.

"So, uh, missy. Where ya from?"

@Hospes​

That was a good point. Surely if someone had truly dragged them all of this way to this odd place, they'd at least have the dignity to explain what the group was to do, right? In any case, Buttercup certainly hoped so. "Of course," she finally replied, offering a small smile. Though, when he told her to shoot him if she couldn't find more people that knew what basketball was, she was a bit confused. No guns in her era, that she was aware of. Maybe he meant throw something at him, or something?

"Florin," she answered simply in regards to his question. "And yourself, mister..." her words trailed off, and Buttercup realized something. "..I don't believe I caught your name."

@Sen​

 

[DapperDogman]

"Hmm... Well that is powerful! But not as powerful you can be with Old Spi..." suddenly Terry was cut off, with the room going pitch black.
Only for it to turn back on after a few seconds where Terry continued "Sorry about that. Old Spice decided it wanted to turn off the Sun".

@The Tactician @DapperDogman​

"The...Hygiene products just turned off the sun?" he asks, his tone one of surprise, and mild amusement

"That stuff must me made of unicorn tears or something, cause that's powerful"


@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

 

[Mu]

That was a good point. Surely if someone had truly dragged them all of this way to this odd place, they'd at least have the dignity to explain what the group was to do, right? In any case, Buttercup certainly hoped so. "Of course," she finally replied, offering a small smile. Though, when he told her to shoot him if she couldn't find more people that knew what basketball was, she was a bit confused. No guns in her era, that she was aware of. Maybe he meant throw something at him, or something?

"Florin," she answered simply in regards to his question. "And yourself, mister..." her words trailed off, and Buttercup realized something. "..I don't believe I caught your name."

@Sen​

"Never heard of it," the young demon commented bluntly. Though if his suspicions were correct woman really was from some place stuck in the olden days he wouldn't even be surprised. He'd never really been universe hopping as much as he dimension hopped, plus that was Ivlis' sort of thing. Emalf often caught his lord doing really strange things. "Emalf, missy. And you?"

@Hospes @phone post pls
​

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"The...Hygiene products just turned off the sun?" he asks, his tone one of surprise, and mild amusement

"That stuff must me made of unicorn tears or something, cause that's powerful"


@Gwazi Magnum @The Tactician​

Upon Wild Dog's mention of Unicorn Tears, Terry Crews energetic behaviour suddenly stopped, as if the forces of nature itself had intervened.
"No... Old Spice is not made of Unicorn tears" Terry Crews said sadly, seemingly having a sad, lonesome and defeated look on his face..
"If it were, we'd be able to clone Morgan Freeman with it" he soon admitted, which was quite peculiar given his usually loud and explosive behaviour.

Titty Sprinkes.

@The Tactician @DapperDogman

​

 

[Midnight Maiden]

"Never heard of it," the young demon commented bluntly. Though if his suspicions were correct woman really was from some place stuck in the olden days he wouldn't even be surprised. He'd never really been universe hopping as much as he dimension hopped, plus that was Ivlis' sort of thing. Emalf often caught his lord doing really strange things. "Emalf, missy. And you?"

@Hospes @phone post pls
​

He'd never heard of Florin? Truly? How odd. It seemed as though everyone knew of the place.. But maybe the man was from a place of a great distance from the kingdom? Buttercup was unsure, but she supposed it didn't matter. Not right then, anyways - it seemed there were more important matters at hand. Like how the hell they'd gotten to this weird place, and why she couldn't remember the answer to that.

And, of course, introducing herself was also probably pretty high priority. Oops.

"Oh, of course. I'm Buttercup," she stated, pleasantly. "Pleasure to meet you, Emalf."

@Sen​

 

[Khan of the Mardu]

Upon Wild Dog's mention of Unicorn Tears, Terry Crews energetic behaviour suddenly stopped, as if the forces of nature itself had intervened.
"No... Old Spice is not made of Unicorn tears" Terry Crews said sadly, seemingly having a sad, lonesome and defeated look on his face..
"If it were, we'd be able to clone Morgan Freeman with it" he soon admitted, which was quite peculiar given his usually loud and explosive behaviour.

Titty Sprinkes.

@The Tactician @DapperDogman

​

"While we may not have Morgan Freeman, I like to think I am the best replacement until we do succeed in recruiting the immaculate Mister Freeman," he shot the two men a dashing smile, "I also like believe that Terry is a perfect replacement until we recruit the glorious Mister Samuel L. Jackson."​

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"While we may not have Morgan Freeman, I like to think I am the best replacement until we do succeed in recruiting the immaculate Mister Freeman," he shot the two men a dashing smile, "I also like believe that Terry is a perfect replacement until we recruit the glorious Mister Samuel L. Jackson."​

"What!?" Terry Crews exclaimed at the notion just proposed.
"There ain't no one who can match me and my muscles!"

He then cried out, sick of these mother fucking meta's in this mother fucking RP!​

 

[DapperDogman]

"While we may not have Morgan Freeman, I like to think I am the best replacement until we do succeed in recruiting the immaculate Mister Freeman," he shot the two men a dashing smile, "I also like believe that Terry is a perfect replacement until we recruit the glorious Mister Samuel L. Jackson."​

"What!?" Terry Crews exclaimed at the notion just proposed.
"There ain't no one who can match me and my muscles!"

He then cried out, sick of these mother fucking meta's in this mother fucking RP!​

"You two are really something, ya know that?" Wild Dog murmurs, looking between them slowly "So, using this Old Spice stuff will make me...manlier, and more suave, huh?"

"And here I thought I was already irresistible"

With his mask off, he was known to be quite an attractive guy, but with this Old Spice stuff, he could be even more so? This stuff was the work of a god, it had to be!

@The Tactician @Gwazi Magnum​

 

[Khan of the Mardu]

"What!?" Terry Crews exclaimed at the notion just proposed.
"There ain't no one who can match me and my muscles!"

He then cried out, sick of these mother fucking meta's in this mother fucking RP!​

Isaiah cocked a brow as he saw a chance to be sassy, "What Mister Jackson lacks in athleticism, he more than redeems by being a much stauncher fornicator of mothers than you, Terry."​

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"You two are really something, ya know that?" Wild Dog murmurs, looking between them slowly "So, using this Old Spice stuff will make me...manlier, and more suave, huh?"

"And here I thought I was already irresistible"

With his mask off, he was known to be quite an attractive guy, but with this Old Spice stuff, he could be even more so? This stuff was the work of a god, it had to be!

@The Tactician @Gwazi Magnum​

Isaiah cocked a brow as he saw a chance to be sassy, "What Mister Jackson lacks in athleticism, he more than redeems by being a much stauncher fornicator of mothers than you, Terry."​

"Well... I'm not sure if it will do both or either even... I mean, I'm not really suave. And Mustafa here lacks all these Muscles. It basically just enhances a certain aspect of you".
Terry tried to explain to the now new Old Spice initiate.

But then Mustafa had to challenge Terry's abilites.
"Say that again".​

 

[Khan of the Mardu]

"You two are really something, ya know that?" Wild Dog murmurs, looking between them slowly "So, using this Old Spice stuff will make me...manlier, and more suave, huh?"

"And here I thought I was already irresistible"

With his mask off, he was known to be quite an attractive guy, but with this Old Spice stuff, he could be even more so? This stuff was the work of a god, it had to be!

@The Tactician @Gwazi Magnum​

"As Mister Crews would say, Mister Wheeler, Old Spice gives you the power, the drive, and the desire to exceed your own mortal limitations. The god Zeus will never match your manliness nor your gentlemanly conduct when applied with Old Spice body wash and spray!"​

 

[Khan of the Mardu]

"Well... I'm not sure if it will do both or either even... I mean, I'm not really suave. And Mustafa here lacks all these Muscles. It basically just enhances a certain aspect of you".
Terry tried to explain to the now new Old Spice initiate.

But then Mustafa had to challenge Terry's abilites.
"Say that again".​

"Part of being a gentleman is admitting your own faults, Terry. Just as Mister Freeman can best me with his soft-spoken and wisdom-filled voice, so can Mister Freeman defeat you with his staunch fornication of mothers."

Questioning your shit all day and all night, Terry.​

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

"Part of being a gentleman is admitting your own faults, Terry. Just as Mister Freeman can best me with his soft-spoken and wisdom-filled voice, so can Mister Freeman defeat you with his staunch fornication of mothers."

Questioning your shit all day and all night, Terry.​

"Fine, I'll concede" Terry Crews said, standing down.

"After all. It takes a very special lady to get close to these Muscles!".​