Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea

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Ivan watched silently in shock as he watched Makai take charge. Instead of appreciating his kind words, the priest only grew flustered in embarrassment before reluctantly grabbing the lamb from the freezer. He remained quiet for a moment, while glancing down at the wound, before shooting the demon a glance.

"I really don't understand why you're being so nice to me. You must have some ulterior motive for this. I do believe you at least enjoy this dimension, you know? That place - that place is terrible! I wasn't even one of those souls. The fact that I won't be able to be saved scares me..."
 
"Ulterior motive? Nah. Not really. Is it that unbelievable that I'd rather be here, away from the pressure and the constant fighting? You saw how it is down there. It's bad, isn't it? And my Mother's in charge, so I have no purpose there anyway. She said she'd welcome my help, but she's done nothing but ostracise me since I arrived back. Ridiculous, right?! I murdered my father for her, and she casts me out because, clearly, she's scared I'll do the same to her and take the throne and... I'm babbling," he laughed lightly, turning back towards the carrots, though with his broad shoulders hunched and lips pointed down into a telling frown-- one he was glad Ivan wasn't able to see.

"I like it here, Ivan. Macon, specifically. I've travelled a lot, but it's nice here-- I can see why you'd want to be here, not in Hell. Pretty easy choice, really. But hey, humans can live for a long time, right? You have ages yet, like Laura-- or you could end up in Heaven. I'm sure the old guy up there will take you in if you keep this priest stuff up. Perhaps he'll overlook the fact you're dating Azaiah and associating with me."
 
"I'm pretty sure being romantically involved with demons is a big no-no. Literally frowned upon, let alone going as far as having romantic involvement at all is pretty darn sinful," he insisted, while inhaling hard. It was a heavy thought, one that he had gone over in his mind many nights, but the actual sight of Hell only shook him harder to the core.

"Want to hear a funny story? I know that demons can possess other's bodies, and I've been called for plenty of exorcisms in other local towns. We don't really have that problem here, surprisingly, but apparently other cities are pretty rampant. It was one of the scariest things I've ever seen, so I sort of quit that job pretty fast, after the third or fourth one."
 
"For the record, I've never done that sort of shit. Inhabiting the bodies of humans, making them do things... I don't need to inhabit people to make them get up to trouble, as you've... seen... Anyway, why'd you quit? I think it'd be quite fun to perform an exorcism, and I'm a demon-- you know, the demons that get up to this sort of stuff were never looked upon favourably by my father. When I was a kid, he made me watch him burn a few dozen to death. Said they shouldn't have come to this realm and 'sinned like a human' or something. He was always a bit sadistic, my father. You'd never have guessed, huh?" He sarcastically remarked, placing the carrots in the pan with the meat to cook, silently impressed by his work. Chopping a carrot up wasn't rocket science, granted, but for someone who had been pampered most his childhood and waited on hand and foot, it was a decent effort for his first time.

"...I haven't got an ulterior motive, by the way. I'm serious about that. I wanna settle here until my Mother decides she's fed up ruling. May take centuries, but... hey, I'm a patient guy."
 
"She seemed pretty intimidating," he reminded, while flopping the lamb onto the pan with a grimace. The worst part of cooking was always the blood. "Some women just have a knack for being commanding. I mean, I imagine your mother is the sort of woman who would beat someone with a riding crop. Just... how do you expect me to trust you, after what you've done? If someone burns your house down, a normal human being is going to just offer a smile and a handshake and act as if everything is okay. I'm a priest, so forgiveness is my job, but it's certainly hard to do. I just want you to make my sister happy and not ruin her life. She's already been through enough."
 
"...Like I said, you're just going to have to take the risk and start trusting me, because I'm not going anywhere. That sounded intimidating, but really, I'm not going to disappear. Not when Laura's going to want to be in contact with you-- I only want the best for her. I flirt with you, and sure, I'd have sex on the damn kitchen table if you wanted to right now, but I do love your sister. I've forgiven her for far more than you realise, so much so that she'd have to forgive me sleeping with you, if that happened. If she didn't, she'd be a hypocrite, let's leave it at that."

Flopping back on the chair, he took a hefty swig of beer and sighed in content - beer was one thing he learned to appreciate about the human realm, especially if it coincided with a hot day in the garden. There wasn't anything better than that. "...Do you think she loves me? Be honest. If she honestly hates me, I'm not forcing a relationship out of nothing. I'm not wasting my time."
 
"I dunno, mate. You've done some bad things." He reminded flatly, before taking a seat across the other at the small table. Eyeing Makai critically, he only relaxed a tad when he watched as one of the large dogs wandered in and take a seat on the tile floor to avoid the growing heat.

"So... You'd really just have sex right now, in the middle of my kitchen? Do you have no dignity? I mean, please tell me that you're more respectful with my sister. This is a kitchen. People eat here."
 
"I'm not discussing my sex life with Laura with you. That's weird. You're her brother and a priest, so the worst person to talk to about this stuff-- but sure, I'd have sex right here if I could. Why not? I've had sex in your garden when you went out grocery shopping," he drawled, keeping his face deadpan and expressionless so the seriousness of his statement couldn't be gauged... though that came to an end when he couldn't help but grin to himself at the memory, and when he realised what the reaction would be like.

"Oh relax. Sex is natural, the garden's natural. Makes sense, I thought," he shrugged, tapping his fingers calmly on the wooden table, if only to distract himself from the urge to shake Laura awake and get a definitive answer from her. The one thing he hated doing was wasting his time, and he wasn't willing to be with her if she had no intention of being with him.
 
"My garden?!" He squeaked in horror, and went as far as to cover his face and shoot a glance out the window to his backyard. "That's... T-That's where my peach trees grow! It's supposed to be pure and inviting to people who want to stop by and relax, and you had sex?! I blamed my dogs for my wilted tulips, but it was just you two messing around... o-oh god..."

"Makai, that's horrible. I mean - you could have gone anywhere else, but you decided to go the extra mile of mischief. Oh, I've got a word with her. I can understand you just disregarding my work, but Laura would have known how important my garden is."
 
"Laura? Oh don't be ridiculous. I suggested it to her, of course I did, but she said it'd upset you and 'what's wrong with a bed?'. Typically boring. Nah, I didn't have sex with Laura out there. You do recall we had a very open marriage, right? Until she slept with that Bishop, I was quite happy with the openness, and she was aware of who I'd slept with," he shrugged, covering his own back from potential criticism. He didn't expect everyone to understand his relationship (or his former relationship, because he didn't want to continue that lifestyle anymore) but he also didn't want to be criticised for it by Laura's brother, especially when she had taken full advantage of the openness to sleep with whoever she wanted to.

"I don't intend on being with anyone other than Laura, if that's comforting for 'ya. Unless she doesn't love me, I want to fully commit to her. See? I can be a decent guy. Flirting with you isn't anything serious. I'm fully aware you'd never sleep with me, so the flirting isn't anything serious-- don't tell Laura I was flirting with you, alright? I... I kinda need you to convince her we're on good terms."
 
"I don't think I could ever have an 'open relationship'. We were put on this Earth to dedicate ourselves to one person. Not to mention, that fact that you not only had sex in my garden, but with a woman I've never met?! That's... I'm beyond offended. I don't know how your relationship works, but I'm horrified." He admitted, the other's admission causing him to shutter.

"Go wake her up, then, will you? You're clearly anxious, and I just want life to get back to normal as soon as possible."
 
"It's a tight community, I'm sure you've met her. She had a cross, if I recall, so maybe she's a member of the church-- look, it isn't important, even though your hypocrisy is amusing. I sleep with someone in my open marriage that I had agreement from Laura to do, and I'm despicable. Laura sleeps with a Bishop behind my back, without consulting me, and you advised her that he would be a much better suitor than I would-- or am I wrong about that?"

Scoffing under his breath to keep his anger in check, he deliberately refused to move the seat, purely childishly. He wanted to wake Laura, sure, but not when Ivan told him to. Petulantly, he was going to leave Laura asleep just to spite the priest. "I can wait. Don't you like talking to me alone? I'm enjoying our chat. Laura, for all her good qualities, does hog conversations, and I'd rather not put up with her constantly interrupting."
 
"I do not enjoy talking about your weird sex life, no. You better swear to the Lord that you will never sleep with someone that isn't my sister, if you two are going to be together, understood?" He replied, his voice stern. For a man clearly shorter and far weaker, Ivan had no problem being demanding. One of his best friends was a "fire and brimstone" sort of preacher, and he took a good amount of inspiration from him.

"I don't understand why you're so proud of what you've done. You're a demon, so maybe you have no sense of morality when it comes to something like making love."
 
"I am not swearing a goddamn thing to your Lord. Do not threaten me with that again, alright? You don't have any right to judge my marriage. Laura's the one who suggested the open marriage. She's the one who first slept with someone else, so don't fucking-- Boy, you're really riling me up Ivan. I'm trying to be on my best behaviour," he laughed, pushing himself back against the chair once realising he'd not only leaned forward angrily, but had gotten to his feet and been, quite literally, one second away from grabbing the priest and throwing him to the floor. He wasn't a violent person, surprisingly, but the insinuation of swearing to God was one he obviously grew offended and disgusted by.

"...You know, my love life really isn't that strange compared to the rest of my family. My father had affairs all through his marriage, he probably had a dozen girlfriends on the go. One of my sisters kills the servants she sleeps with for the 'thrill'. I don't think me and Laura are really that odd, but hey, you continue judging us, that's totally cool."
 
"Your family isn't the best to compare to when it comes to normal relationships," he reminded flatly, while remaining in his seat calmly. "I mean, your father is dead and probably has a dozen illegitimate children, and your mother clearly doesn't seem to watch after your sisters and brothers."

With a heavy sigh, Ivan glanced at the window to see his plants were doing well, despite their neglect in the recent days, and only frowned once realizing he couldn't avoid eye contact forever.
 
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"...We're a pretty fucked up family, I'll give you that. I suppose it's saying something that I'm the most normal one. It doesn't reflect well on the others, you're right. I personally find my family amusing. For all her faults, my Mother does care about us all. Sure, I left because she was ostracising me and cutting me out, but she cares, in her own way-- Maybe you should go and answer the door."

Smiling quietly as he promptly shut up, he did battle back the urge to go and answer the door himself, that of which had been knocked upon for the past ten seconds while Makai talked. Except, before he had a chance to even answer, the door was opened by the visitor, quietly and slowly out of curiosity.

"...Ivan? Father? Are you in-- You're sort of late for the bake sale at the church and, well, I was sent to come and look for you," murmured the woman, who stood in the hallway whilst patting down her honey blonde bob. She hadn't been a member of the community long, maybe three or four months after moving from Mississippi, but she was a visitor to the church since her very first day of moving to Macon. The woman was far from being rich, but, with her husband owning a hardware store, her family was comfortable, and that, in a poor community like Ivan's, was enough for her to stand out and gather a reputation. This was something she absolutely adored and lived up to, always wearing her makeup perfectly and without a strand of her out of place.

Because she hadn't been in the neighbourhood too long, she didn't know who Makai was, or Laura, the couple having left during the time she arrived. This left the woman -appropriately named Sandy, given her hair colour- glancing curiously at Laura and the babies on the couch, her smile only brightening once spotting Ivan... and then promptly widening at spotting Makai, too. She was a Christian woman who hadn't looked at anyone other than her husband, but it was hard not to flush red at the sight of someone like Makai, which left her fanning herself as subtly as she could. "Oh, my, you already have visitors. No matter, the girls at the church will understand. Are you going to accompany us at the bake sale? Don't say you've forgotten, we've planned this for a month. Gotta fix that roof somehow~"

"He's had a lot on his plate. Family problems," charmed Makai, deciding the excuse was vague enough to pass as justifiable without going into too many details. He wasn't oblivious to the woman's flushed cheeks, which was always nice for his ego, but his eyes weren't at all focused on her. Instead, they'd drifted to the 18-year-old stood behind her, meeting her eyes and grinning once he did. "Is this your daughter? I can see where she gets her looks from."

"Oh-- Oh, she's a little troublemaker. You know she got kicked out of high school for bullying some poor girl? The only reason she got into college was because the dean is a personal friend of my husband's." Sandy tutted, talking to Makai like he was an old friend whilst glaring firmly at the teenager behind her. "Ivan's offered her so much at the church, and she never attends the services. I've had to pay her ten dollars just to help out today, y'know?"

"You can't help your Mama out at a bake sale without being paid for it? That sure is selfish," the demon tutted, resting his hands behind his head. While Sandy assumed from that he was on her side and happily smiled to herself -even if he was a stranger-, Makai clearly meant no such thing. His tone was playful more than serious, and any chance he got, he was shooting secret grins towards her daughter, going as far as to wink after his teasing. Eventually, he pushed himself to his feet with a long groan and switched the oven off. "Come on, Ivan. We can still make it to the sale, can't we? Leave those two sleep off their aches and pains. I'd love to help you at the church. You can't say no to an extra pair of hands, can you?"
 
"Oh - oh, Lord, I forgot..." groaned Ivan as he scurried to the door, completely forgetting his quite obviously bruised face and is generally disheveled appearance. Priding himself with always looking clean and proper not only during services, but also just out and about when with Azaiah, he was left to laugh nervously as he covered his eye.

"Ah, my brother-in-law is right. We've all been dealing with some stressful family issues that I almost completely forgot about it. Luckily, I did remember to make brownies the other night. Um... Give me a moment, alright? I'll get into something proper. Azaiah won't be able to come, though, we both sort of got into an accident trying to grab a few fans from the attic, hence my beautiful shiner," the priest lied, as he hurried off to his and Azaiah's bedroom in search of a proper outfit.

Meanwhile, the young teen had remained almost completely silent, and instead put her energy in the gum she chewed, blowing bubbles every now and then just to hear it snap. With short, black hair and an unsurprising, equally as black wardrobe, she was a complete contrast to her sunny mother.

She had only came along for the money, and the inevitable sweets, sure. At the same time, Valerie wasn't a heartless monster - despite trying to dress like one. Her mother insisted on going door to door to greet every single neighbor, with her bright smile and obnoxiously pink blazer pants that just screamed Tupperware salesmen. One thing she enjoyed about Ivan was the fact that he was completely unphased by her appearance, and she was a sucker for his dogs. Otherwise, if it was anyone else, she would have remained in the car.

Whistling over the remaining dog that had moved to the floor to sleep, she couldn't hide a smile behind her moody appearance as she happily cooed and rustled the dog's floppy ears, only letting her attention drift once Makai had tried to strike up a conversation. Clearing her throat, she sighed in relief that the dog that happened to be near was pitch black, in contrast to the pure white one in the kitchen, and carefully scraped her Demonia shoes on the step.

"Freedom of religion is a think, right? Well, I don't get involved. It ain't that difficult," she eventually spoke with a southern drawl, her Mississippi accent far more prominent than even Ivan's Georgian one.

Speaking of which, Ivan crashed their short talk once appearing in his proper attire, and offered a nervous laugh to the two. Glancing at Makai, and his devious gaze at Valerie, he let out a heavy sigh in defeat. He couldn't seem rude in front of members of his congregation, so he was left in a bit of a pickle.

"Makai, can you grab the brownies? There's some whipped cream in there, can you be a doll and grab it? We need to head out soon, after all."
 
Waiting patiently for Ivan to leave the room, Makai quietly perched on the edge of the couch to observe the two women. Sandy was the sort of woman he detested. Unnaturally happy and cheery without a hair out of place, with ideas of herself far above the reality. As irritating as he immediately found the woman, she flirtatious tone she took up with him seconds after Ivan had left was... interesting. She claimed to be a Christian woman, donned the cross around her neck proudly, but the married woman was apparently happy to flirt with him in front of her daughter. Granted, Sandy probably didn't realise she was acting like some ditzy schoolgirl - he tended to make people flirt without them realising they were.

"My daughter, she's such a terror. Do you know how stressful it is dealing with a sullen teenage girl who's probably going to mess up college too? Honestly, I find time for the church, I always will, but she doesn't make it easy for me," the woman huffed, twirling a strand of hair around her finger as casually as she could. "...You're the brother-in-law? I've never heard Ivan mention you. He's mentioned Laura--"

"She's not my wife. We divorced-- more specifically, she divorced me. Ivan and I had our issues, but we're back on track. Not that Laura and I are. That's a whole other story," he smiled, trying to drop the conversation as quickly as he could without seeming too rude. He wanted to get on with people, if only to prove to Ivan he was on his best behaviour, but he didn't want to talk to Sandy more than was necessary. He thought he'd made it pretty obvious that he was far more interested in her daughter.

He didn't really have a chance to respond, though, grumbling under his breath as he wandered to retrieve the brownies from the fridge obediently. Sandy finished watching him go, before letting a small breath leave her lips, chuckling not too long afterwards. "Well, it sure is a mighty shame Azaiah couldn't come. All the ladies love him, he's so charming... But Makai is bound to sweep everyone off their feet, he's very... likeable..."
 
"That's an interesting way to phrase that," Ivan replied with his own forced laugh, and absently tapped his foot. Once alone enough with the mother, he leaned to Sandy with hushed whispers.

"Makai is fully married, I can assure you. He's a playboy, I... I would keep him away from your daughter. I just want him to work it out with my sister, you know? I cannot tell you what to do, child, but I just want to keep you all from more problems." Ivan explained slowly, while shooting a nervous glance towards the kitchen.

"That's unfortunate." Valerie replied flatly, and went as far as to roll her eyes before grabbing her phone, locking her eyes on the screen. "I thought your family was depressingly normal, Father, but it's nice to know you at least have some fun every now and then..."

"Ah, yes, well... I'm not one for crazy spontaneity. I'm quite boring, to be honest, and I'm fine with that. To each is own! I'm just content with spending time relaxed, and Azaiah cooking up some proper food for me."
 
"Playboy? O-Oh golly-- are you listening, Valerie? I swear, that child can't tear her eyes away from that darn phone of hers. Her father should never have bought it for her, I told him she'd grow too attached, but we just wanted to see a smile from her. She's so very moody. No, no, you're right, Father. If he's as... prolific as you suggest, I'll make sure Valerie keeps a healthy distance."

Carrying the tray of brownies with a smile, it appeared that Makai hadn't heard he was being discussed and talked about. He seemed calm and oblivious enough as he motioned eagerly to the door-- though, as he passed Ivan, with the humans facing the other way, he made sure to shoot him a fierce glare. "Don't talk about me behind my back like that, Ivan. If I want to talk to that girl, I'll talk to her. I would have thought you'd jump at the chance to get me out of Laura's life, hm? Or would you prefer me hanging around and being under your roof every week for the next few years?"

Smiling to himself as he straightened his back, he passed the brownies over to him and strolled outside into the sun, silently appreciating the nice weather over Hell's intense and overbearing heat. "Do you smoke, Valerie? I bet your Mama doesn't like you smoking, she seems protective," he drawled, making sure to smirk at Ivan after matching his stride with Valerie's to walk alongside her. If Ivan was worried about him talking to her, he was going to do it purely out of spite. "...I bet you don't just smoke cigarettes. I know these things about people, I'm good at guessing. Hey, you don't have to admit it. I'm a weird stranger who Ivan's already gossiped about. Don't believe everything he says. I'm not a 'playboy' or whatever. He's very dramatic."
 
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