are we friends?

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"I gave her the big news that day. I told her the truth and she said that I wasn't her child anymore. She disowned me and then had a heart attack later that day. All of our family members on my mom's side have died unnaturally because of weak health, and I'm no difference. The only difference is probably that I'm gay and unable to give on this horrible sickness. It's strange to think that I'll probably die young and lonely as well."
She was still looking at the grave, not paying attention to the tears in her eyes. She knew her illness would be her death.
 
Shion puts her face inches from Kano's. "Hey! Don't think that way! You've gatta stay positive and I'm sure you'll find someone!" She smiles. "And so what if you're gay? I'm bi but you don't hear me making excuses."
 
"That's not an excuse. I meant because I'm practically a ticking bomb, I'll end up lonely." She smiled sadly. "After all, who'd want to be with someone who will likely die in their thirties or fourties? Possibly earlier? Any breath could be my last." She sighed deeply and looked down at the grave. "I always thought it was just crap, and then my mother died. I had a seizure this morning, missed my first two periods in school. And that was caused by running the last fifty metres to school. I don't even know if I'll survive this week. It's a bit depressing."
 
Shion nods. "Okay, in that case..." She kisses Kano. "If you know you may die any day then live every day like its your last, like I do. Then you'll have no regrets." She smiles. "Besides, if someone didn't want to be with you just cuz you're dieing, then their not worth your time anyway."
 
"If I live every day as my last I'll wound up dead faster. I don't know what to live for when I can't make friends right because I always look so down, and when I finally talk to them about my problems I'm ignored." She barely even paid attention to the kiss as her tears would continue falling. "It's not them who aren't worth my time, I'm just not worth spending time on. I'm an useless child."
 
"Aren't you telling me about your problems? I'm not ignoring you am I? If you don't enjoy what time you have left then you'll only suffer. I'm not saying you should go do something dangerous. I'm just saying that you shouldn't focus on it if its going to happen anyway, ya know?" She hugs Kano, trying to cheer her up. "I don't like seeing my friends upset."
 
She looks up at the girl above her with blank eyes. "I... I'm sorry... I just don't know how to focus on anything, and when I finally forget my condition I suddenly have a blackout and realize my situation..." She looked down at her hands, entwining her pale, skinny fingers as she looked at them "... and you wouldn't want me as a friend... I feel faint. I don't know what is really me anymore.. if this is the real me, or maybe the happy me is real... I don't really know. All I know is that this body won't last as long as I'd want it to."
 
Akari started walking home it wasn't a long walk but she was terribly unfit and had to sit down half way there.
she sat down on the ground and wrapped her coat around her. one woman passing by threw her a coin. she laughed and went to give the woman her money back but she had gone. So akari continue on her journey home.
 
Shion smiles sweetly. "Maybe both are the real you. I do want you as a friend. I'm always up for making new friends. And I think that maybe a friend is what you need right now."
 
"Well... if that's what you wish..." She looks down with a small smile, wiping her tears. She hadn't had a real friend in a while.. not ever since she figured out that her decease would likely cause her death. She had shut herself in and refused to show a true face to anyone. That's why she pretended to be so carefree when at school. If she were to tell anyone, she'd be deserted and lonely, being the only one whose life was running out like water through sand.
"I'd be happy with that.." She muttered under her breath as she continued to stare at the grave. If only... she hadn't been born... she blinked a couple of times with her eyes trying to get rid of the last tears. Despite everything, she hated crying in front of others.
 
Shion smiles. "If you ever need to talk, I'm here. Okay?" She stands up.
 
"Mhm... thank you." She moves away from the grave and then looks at Shion. "So... anything you wanna do..?"
 
"Well, I was planning on going to the warehouse that Kuroi told me about to skate after visiting my brother. Wanna come?" She smiles.
 
"Uhm sure.. But I don't really skate." She sighs and looks away slightly, looking rather uncomfortable. She didn't really like crowds of people and if there were going to be more people than Shion, she'd probably have some kind of nervous breakdown in the middle of everything.
 
Shion nods. "Its okay. If you want, I can teach you. And with what I have gotten to know about you, I'm guessing you're no good with people. If there's too many, we can leave."
 
"Uh.. I-I'd rather just watch... and thank you... I think I might get a breakdown or something if there's too many... I can't breathe and my body completely sets out, and then I lose every memory of where I am... that sort of feeling.." She looks down and runs a hand through her hair. It'd been a while since she'd talked honestly with anyone.
 
Shion smiles and takes her hand. "No prob. Let's go!" She walks with her, whistling the same song she had played at the grave along the way.
 
She walks with the other girl, her gaze turned to their hands most of the time. She hadn't held someone's hand in a long time, since people had thought the decease would pass onto them if she were to touch anyone.
 
Shion noticed her looking at their hands. "What's up? Is my hand sweaty or something?" She laughs, her ADHD starting to kick in again.
 
"Uhh... no... I was just.. t-thinking... I'm sorry..." She looked away with a blush on her cheeks, her hand still not leaving Shion's. She hated being caught doing stupid things like that.
 
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