An intruder barges into your room! Your weapon is the object to your left...

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A calculator...
Aww, I wanna come up with some good math jokes, but I can't think of any >.<
 
M-my cat? ...I guess that works. Claw that guy's eyes out girl!
 
A wall is directly to my left, but to my right is a katana that I use left-handed. Does that work?

Actually, true story, i drew it on my mother once on snap reaction when she let herself into my apt. O.o
 
My Tablet, remote, laptop, laptop charger, and my large handbag... phone too but thats too easy to call 911
 
Mine is an old somewhat falling apart sewing chair... well I suppose I could throw it and run.
 
Mine is a toilet paper roll... crap... XD
 
A tissue box, stool and a cushion. Throw the stool at the intruder and run. if that doesn't work, beat the hell out of the intruder with the cushion :) then use the tissues to wipe the blood :) lol
 
My calculator. Actually not bad, it's pretty hefty for a calculator, though I'd hate to get blood on it.
 
An empty space, but maybe I can throw the dog hair lying on the floor and hope the intruder is allergic.
 
A Baby Spice barbie doll.

DON'T JUDGE ME.
 
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A cup with lukewarm water. PREPARE FOR SLIGHT UNCOMFORT. AND THEN SKULL BLUDGEONING
 
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Cord for my phone charger. I'm gonna turn the tables with some old-fashioned stranglin'!
 
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