Afraid of Losing You {AcornTree}

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It broke her heart to see him like that; it almost made her break down in the moment that she heard his weak voice. This was such a contrast to how he had been acting the past couple of days because while he may have been down about things he always made an effort to not show it. Now though? He wasn't even making an effort to hide the way he was feeling. And Hope knew she should have expected this, except she still couldn't help but feel surprised by it all nonetheless, and it scared her to see the state that he was in. She shook her head as she listened to him, biting her lip as a tear slipped from her eye though she didn't sob. She climbed herself onto the bed then and laid down next to him so that she could wrap one of her arms over his body, pulling herself closer to him as she breathed out a sigh and tried to feel his warmth. As she tried to comfort him...

Hope figured that with the way he had been acting before, the ways in which he was able to make himself happy even if he wasn't, had helped her in more ways than she had thought. In a way, she almost thought of it to be his sort of way of comforting her for the time being, just so that he wouldn't ruin his mood. And it worked. But now, that was all gone, and she knew that she had to be there for him. She had to be the one to comfort him and she had to be the strong one for them. The past couple of days, and even the day that they found out, he had always been the strong one while she had been the weak one. Now it was her turn.

"It's okay," she said quietly to him, even if she knew that those word's were true yet she felt as if she had to say them anyway. How was he going to tell his family? Again, she figured that as soon as they found out that they would be on their way there to so that they could be with their son in his parents' case and with her brother in his sister's case. She didn't know though. It was going to hurt, regardless of it all, but she knew that he had to tell them about this. This wasn't something that he could keep in the dark from them because it was too much, it was too big of an important thing to keep away from them. She wasn't sure how much his medical and family medical history would play into anything, but if it played any sort of role in it, she would rather his family be there since they actually knew the family history about that. All she knew about was that one little allergy he had. "But I don't know. I just... Just tell them?" She opened her eyes and looked at him, her brows quivering as well as her lips. "Or... I could tell them. If you don't think you can, I can." Would it be the best choice for her to tell them? Probably not. But if William was already so broken up about this and was already holding back so much because he didn't want to tell them, maybe it would be best if she said it rather than him. It would hurt her more, yes, but if it made him feel better then she would. If he wanted her to do it she would.
 
William knew he was breaking, if he wasn't broken already. This was why he'd wanted to hide. To pretend. Because otherwise he'd have been this way every day. He sucked in a breath as Hope pulled him closer to her and he curled into her, squeezing his eyes shut hard. He didn't want to not tell his parents. He knew that he had to - that he should. It was just so hard, how was he supposed to? He didn't know if everything was going to be okay or not? What if it wasn't? What if it was his 'turn', as they said? What if he had to leave here, leave Hope? He couldn't.

His face was getting hot from trying not to cry. It was the only thing he could try not to do, was cry. Everything else was just coming out of him. So much for waiting after dinner. For waiting until after he'd told his parents. There would be many conversations before he went to the hospital, about many things, he was sure. But still. He shook his head when she suggested that she could tell them instead. It was tempting. So very, very tempting. He wouldn't have to deal with them until the got here, because like her he knew that his parents and sister would come. He just... couldn't do that to them or to Hope.

"I... should..." He responded, sniffling some and shaking his head again. "I'm sorry... I just... just telling... the principal was so hard I..." He hid his face in his hands, sucking in another deep breath. He wasn't ready for this. He didn't think he could do this.
 
She could tell that he was doing everything he could to not cry, just as she was doing everything she could to not sob. Apparently she hadn't gotten everything out of her system when talking with Emily, Hope figured, though if she was being honest with herself, she figured that if anything she may have actually broken down had she not had that talk with Emily. She sniffed again as she continued to listen to him, nodding her head, trying to understand how hard this was for him though not knowing. Yes, this was hard for her because she didn't want to see him like this and the potential threat of her losing him to this cancer continued to swell in her mind, but he was the one that was actually going through all of this. He was the one who was going to have to go through all the changes both physically and emotionally while she was only going to have to go through this emotionally. She wasn't the one who had to tell her family that she had cancer. She wasn't the one who would have to be stuck in the hospital for a month while they pumped poison through him.

She had no idea what he was going through, and now that Hope thought about it, she knew that she likely never would be able to know what he was going through.

When he hid his face in his hands, Hope lowered his gaze to look at his covered face, brushing her nose and then her forehead against his hand as she breathed out another sigh, more tears coming from her eyes. Be strong, she told herself. She had to be strong for him. This wasn't the way she had expected things to go when she got back to the apartment. If anything, she figured that they would have tried to be normal for a little bit longer until he told his family, but, as she could see now, that wasn't the case. William was beginning to lose it and she could already tell and she didn't like it. "It's hard for you, I know and it's okay. It's completely okay..." It took a large amount of effort on her part to try and keep her voice steady, even if there were still quivers in there and even if it shook. But she had to do this for him. "You've still got time though, okay? You don't have to tell them yet; not right now. But when you do I'll be right there with you if you want me to." She sniffed again. "I'm here for you, I always will be, and I'll help you if you need it. Just tell me what to do."
 
He had no idea what she could do to help. He wished he could tell her, because then it might make him feel better too. He moved his hands since she had nudged against them though, putting his arms around her too and then hiding his face in her chest rather than his own hands. He nodded. He still had time. She was right. "Please be with me." he whispered. He didn't see how he could have possibly had fun yesterday. He had no idea how he'd suppressed all of this now that he was feeling it so strongly.

"I can't do this without you..." He was almost certain that that was fact. How could he? How could anyone go through this alone? He took another deep breath, his throat feeling hoarse despite not having done a whole lot besides try not to cry. "Can we just... I don't know... do .... anything else?" He wanted to be close to her like this, but he also needed to do something. Keep his mind off things. "Or... I don't know..." He didn't know what to do to make himself feel better. What could possibly make him feel beter?
 
Hope merely nodded her head to what he said, silently agreeing that she would be there with him, always, and when ever he needed her. But even if she knew that, it brought her mind back to the fact that she was going to have to be gone for a while on Saturday for the shoot, something that she still had yet to tell him about. But that wasn't until the evening since the couple wanted most of the pictures to be taken during the sunset, though while still having pictures when it was still pretty light outside. She figured that it would probably take a few hours to do the shoot, but she knew that as soon as she was done with it that she would head back to the hospital. His family would probably be with him as well, she figured, which would make it to where he wasn't alone, something that made her feel a little better about the situation. At least he wouldn't be alone then. Still, it didn't make her feel any less guilty.

"You're not going to go through this alone, and I can promise you that. I'm always going to be here." She traveled her hand that rubbed his back up to his hair when he pressed his face into her chest, her fingers weaving through his hair as she tried to calm him, and herself, down for the time being. "I'll be able to be here with you all tomorrow and Friday. Emily gave me the day off tomorrow too since there isn't anything planned." Hopefully that would help with things a bit. Hopefully that would make him a little bit better to know that she wasn't going to go into work for the next two days. But when he asked to do something else, she didn't really know what to do. She almost suggested doing something with music, but with the state he was in she doubted if he would be up for playing anything, or for really listening to anything either.

"We can watch tv or a movie together. Or we could order pizza or Chinese and have it delivered here for later on." But then she figured that he wouldn't want to eat, and really she didn't want to either. But still, it was only a suggestion. She was only throwing out things that came to her mind that may make him feel better. "Or we could just go for a walk, with or without Jazzy to get a little fresh air. I don't know though. What ever you want to do."
 
Hope's hand through his hair calmed him for now. At least, a lot more than he had been. Not exactly calm, but better. He also felt better that Hope wasn't going to work tomorrow or Friday. He didn't know what he was going to do if he was here by himself. Or here by himself with his family. He really hoped his mother in particular wasn't going to be hysterical because he couldn't handle that. He just couldn't deal with something like that. Not with everything else in chaos too.

When Hope suggested what they could do, he thought about these things. Maybe... moving would help him some. "Lets... go on a walk..." He decided, voice still shaky, but better than how he had been speaking. Yes. For now, he was a little better. Hope had done that for him. He was thinking Chinese sounded good, but he knew that he couldn't eat even if he had an appetite. He would be physically incapable of it right then.

"We can take Jazzy." he added. He didn't care if the little dog came with them. She probably needed the walk, and watching the dog sometimes made him smile too. "In a few minutes..." He just wanted to be with Hope for now, and her lovely fingers in his hair.
 
"Okay, a walk. We can do that then." Hope nodded her head stiffly at the thought, breathing out another sigh as neither of them made any move to get up from the bed so that they could walk. She could hear Jazzy's collar again when her name was brought up again, and in the side of her vision she could see the little dog sitting at the side of the bed, her tail stiff and her ears still pulled back. Hope turned her head and looked at the dog, frowning slightly before she motioned with her head to allow the dog to get on the bed. Again, even it was normally against their rules to let Jazzy on the bed, she figured that this could be another exception. William may have needed her there anyway. So long as she wouldn't start to bark or be a pain, Hope figured that it would be alright for her to stay around.

Jazzy, having noticed the motion, wiggled her butt and body as she readied herself to make the jump from the ground to the bed, which she had been able to do with a little bit of a struggle on her part, but as she stumbled across the bed she huffed out a sigh before walking over to William, his back facing her from the position that she had made it there. She rested the underside of her chin on William's side and just stayed there, blinking her eyes as she licked her lips and calmed down. After watching the little action from Jazzy, Hope lifted her head back down and bit her lip, bending her head down then to look at the top of William's hair since his face was still pressed into his chest.

She kissed the top of his head, the silence in the room deafening her, but she figured that this was what needed to happen. This quietness for the time being, because who knew how much longer this silence was going to last for the two of them, especially for William? The fingers that were threaded through his head rubbed back and forth, almost as if she was trying to give him a massage though she wasn't sure if it was even working like she wanted it to. But he wasn't complaining about it, so she kept at it, especially since she knew that he liked it when she played with his hair.

It had probably been more than a few minutes before they finally decided to get out of the bed, actually it had taken almost an hour before they decided to get out of the bed, but when they did they hooked Jazzy to her leash and headed outside to let the fresh air hit them as they started on the walk. Hope stayed closer to William, one of her arms winding around one of his as she kept her body close to his, their pace going slower than they normally would have. Really, it didn't bother Hope in the least bit, but she could tell that Jazzy was getting antsy with the pace, much like she had back in the park a few days ago when they decided to take a walk around the path. "We could head to the cafe if you want," Hope said as she tilted her head to look up at William. "I know we haven't had dinner yet, but sometimes a treat before could be good." If they even decided to eat dinner for that matter, but she pushed the thought aside and left that be.
 
As they laid on the bed, William just focused on pulling himself together. He hadn't expected just telling people to be so hard, but maybe he should have, considering the way that Hope had reacted when she'd found out. It wasn't exactly the telling part that was so hard, but the person's reactions afterwards. He understood that people were upset for him but... it was just not good. It was to complicated to think about, so William pushed it from his head. He just focused on Hope instead, and when Jazzy came to lay her head on him, Jazzy too. His sweet little dog.

If they hadn't decided to go on a walk, William might have just fallen asleep. He was grateful that he hadn't though. He didn't want to waste any time sleeping now when he'd likely be doing too much of that at the hospital. Finally they got up, William sticking closer to Hope than he might normally, making sure that they were holding hands at the very least. When Hope suggested the cafe, he nodded. The idea brought just a tiny baby smile to William's face, and only for a few seconds.

"The cafe sounds good." One last time, perhaps, before he went into the hospital. He also felt like he might be able to stomach a treat more than he could a meal. Once they got there, William opted to stay outside with Jazzy rather than go in to order. He didn't much feel like talking to anyone besides Hope. He sat down at one of the outside tables, Jazzy laying underneath his chair with her nose in between his feet. He told Hope to get him anything, he'd really rather have a surprise than pick something out. He was hoping that there wans't a long line inside the cafe, because he really just wanted Hope to hurry back to him. Suddenly, their time seemed too precious to waste apart from one another. He was going to have to reign that in.

William seemed to be a lot stronger in public, too. He would not break down in front of strangers, only Hope. And maybe his parents but probably not.
 
At least she had been able to pull some sort of reaction out of William about the suggestion with going to the cafe, even if it had only been a tiny smile and even if it had only been there for a few seconds. But Hope appreciated it nonetheless, and she was happy that she was able to give him a little more of joy even if he wasn't necessarily that happy or joyous about anything that was happening to him. Neither was she though. But when they finally made it to the cafe, she couldn't help the disappointment that came to her when he said that he was going to sit outside with Jazzy while she could go inside to get what they wanted. "Okay. I'll get you anything." With a snort nod, she finally removed her hand from his and then headed into the cafe.

Like normal, the place only had a few people in there at the time, those people either on their phones or on their laptops working on things or just messing around since they could use the free internet that the place had. But she ignored those people and waited in the snort line until it was her time to order, herself ordering what the two normally ordered before she grabbed the items that were handed to her after paying for it. Replying with a small thank you, she headed back outside and went to the table that William was sitting at, deciding that, for right now, they could sit there and eat the little treats, just so that they wouldn't have to be in the cooped up apartment like normal. Having this fresh air was good for them, she wanted to think, and it was a nice day out fro right now. Clouds were beginning to appear in the sky as they had been throughout the entire day, the signs of them letting on that it was going to rain either tomorrow or sometime soon. The thought was a bit depressing, just as she felt in that moment, but she tried to push the thought aside.

"Here you go," she said, handing William the key lime tart that he normally ordered hoping that he would like it. She also passed him over a napkin that she grabbed while she did the same for herself. But before she settled herself in, she scooted her chair closer to him sot hat she could be closer. "I hope you don't mind that I got you that; I figured that since that's your favorite that you would want it for right now."
 
William smiled a little bit as Hope came back and set the tart in front of him. "Thank you." He said as Hope sat down. The tart was a good choice. "No, its a good choice." He agreed. Leaning over, William kissed Hope's cheek and then bit into his tart just afterwards. It was good to have his favorite. Hope had certainly picked the right one. It was sour and sweet at the same time, and it was comforting too. He was quiet for a few moments as he munched on the tart.

He was thinking that now would be a good time for them to talk. Now that they were in the open, and he wouldn't break as easily. He could think about things more rationally, and the first thing his brain landed on was money. It was going to be tough for them. They had just enough as it was. He waited a few minutes, just content to be with her for now, but he wanted to address some of the issues of this illness with her here. Now, while he was feeling okay about things.

When he was about three quarters of the way done with his tart, he spoke up. "Hope, I dont want you paying for any of my hospital bills..." He started out. "I don't know... that I can cover rent and utilities and stuff while I'm away but... I'll take care of my own hospital stuff, okay?" He was really hoping his teacher's insurance would come up with most of it. It wasn't like he had a lot, and he'd be missing pay since he had to stop working too.
 
The kiss on the cheek served to calm Hope down a little more. It was just something that made her smile, made her even think that he was doing a little better since he was showing her that sort of affection to her. She leaned her head over then and rested it against his shoulder, breathed out a sigh, and then straightened herself out as she looked back at her pastry and took a bite out of it. Normally, she would have liked it a little more heated then it was now, but she figured that this was good enough for the time being, especially since they were out here in the fresh air. It would suffice, she figured. And at least she was able to stomach it, the treat all about melting in her mouth, though, even if she didn't want to admit it, she knew that it didn't taste as good as it normally did. Normally, she would have made a comment about the matter but found herself unable to. It was almost as if she really couldn't enjoy it.

But she tried, as best as she could she tried. Every once in a while in the silence she would look out in the distance to see cars passing by on the streets and people walking by on the side walk. Seeing it all made her wonder what type of life those people were leading. Were they happy, were they dealing with a family member or significant other finding out that they had cancer? Those weren't good thoughts. They only served to heat her face and body up, so instead of looking at them she turned her eyes to look down at Jazzy who still was laying under William's chair, herself not even picking her head up to try and see if she could get any of the food. That was certainly odd, but Hope figured that she may just be doing that because she knew that something was wrong.

With a sigh escaping past her lips, Hope hadn't been expecting William to speak up anytime soon since he hadn't said anything since he got the key lime tart. While he ate at his treat she continued to eat at her, trying to block her mind out, but when he finally did speak she stopped eating, and she could suddenly feel her stomach flip. Right so now he wanted to talk about it all. It made her nervous to think about, especially with what he said about how he didn't want her to pay for any of his hospital bills. But how could she not? If he needed help she was going to be there to help, no matter what, no matter if they would have financial issues. But.. Would she really be able to do that? Like William she didn't make that much money; they had enough to pay the bills and continue to bring food in the apartment while being comfortable with having a little extra money in their pockets since Hope helped with the bills after she moved in. But without him getting paid, and without his help to pay the bills and rent, she figured that she wouldn't have money to throw at his hospital bills.

"William, I don't want you to have to pay for that all on your own if I can help it." She set the pastry down on the napkin and turned to face him. "I mean, I know with me paying the rent and bills while you're going is just about a given because I don't want you to worry about that, and I don't know how much money I'm really going to have every month with doing that, but... I don't know." Her other account came to mind when she thought about that, the account that had the money she was trying to save for her to start up her own business, but if she had to use that money to help... Then so be it, she guessed. "If I can help I will. I don't want all of that to be just on you because I know it's going to be expensive and I don't know how much your insurance is going to cover. I just don't want you to have to worry about any of that because you have other things to worry about."
 
William had figured that Hope would try to argue with him on this. He shook his head. "I know you want to help but.... Hope... I really don't want you to. You need that money, I don't want you spending all your money on -" He hesitated, because he had almost said 'something that might not work'. "On me." he finished. He knew this would not go over well for her. "Help me in any other way, I'll need you to, but not with your money. Please. You have other things to worry about too, and I couldn't bare to take the money from you." He just couldn't. It wasn't about pride, it was about Hope. If things didn't go right... if he really didn't make it through this, he couldn't leave Hope penniless. He couldn't. He wanted Hope to chase her dreams, not spend all of her money on something that might not work out.

"Please. I would feel better if you just... let me handle the hospital money." It was a stretch just to ask her to take care of the rent and bills for the month. He knew cancer was expensive, and he could only hope that his insurance would cover a lot of the cost. "Please." He echoed. This was just something he felt too strongly about to be a pushover on.
 
Hope didn't like that. She didn't like that he was asking her to not try and help him with that. It was only one month, she figured, that she may have to take care of the bills, or maybe two or three; she wasn't really sure. Really, it just depended on when and if William was going to go back to work and if he was going to be able to go back before the summer time rolled around for how long she was going to have to pay the bills for. She didn't mind that, she didn't mind doing anything like that for him because it was her home too, even if she had only been living there for four months. But she didn't mind helping with the hospital cost either because she didn't want to see him suffer for something like that. If he ended up coming out of this fine after a month, and if he was going to be able to go back to work after a month, then it was all the better and that was when she would push to help him with the bills if he needed it. But if she had to keep taking care of things to make sure that they could keep the apartment and everything else that they had to keep in order to stay alive and survive because he couldn't work... Then she may just have to change things, she figured. But it was an adjustment that she was willing to make for him.

But he seemed to adamant about not wanting her to pay, and she could tell it in his voice. She opened her mouth to speak something, but when he mentioned that last plea for her to not get involved with anything like that, all she could do was sigh and reach out a hand to grab onto his. "Okay," she said, nodding her head. "I won't worry about that." Yet. She almost felt bad for saying that to him when she didn't really mean it, but he just needed to know, or think, that she was going to not do anything. There was a part of her that wanted to ask him how he planned on paying the hospital when he wasn't going to be working and when he wasn't going to have any money coming in, but she knew that it would be wrong to ask him something like that. It would be fair, and, again, she didn't want to argue about this with him. That would serve no better purpose, and it would only upset them when they didn't need to be upset. Especially not with each other. Especially not right now.

"I just don't want you to have to worry about anything, William. I don't need you to worry and stress about something like that because of everything that's going on. You're going to need to relax while you're in the hospital, and even you know that."
 
William gave Hope's hand a squeeze when she put her hand on top of his own. He felt better, whens he said okay, even if she was still putting up excuses as to why he should let her help pay for them. "If you pay for them I'll worry and stress more." He insisted quietly. He dind't want to sap that from her. He would worry about how she was if she started to help paying for some of the bills. It was better for the both of them, he was sure.

Weirdly, sitting at the cafe talking about this stuff, he felt so calm. A completely 180 as to how he had been at the apartment. He felt like he could talk about this stuff with Hope here, and he wouldn't break down. He hoped that that was true. That he could remain strong here. Maybe it was because of the people walking and driving by, or the fresh air, or both. It just felt better to talk with her about it here.

"We should probably talk a lot here, for now." They could talk later too, he was just letting Hope know that he was feeling up to it now. That this was a good time. He didn't know what else to address. There was... so much.
 
And Hope didn't like that thought either; the fact that he would worry more if she tried to help him with anything dealing with the hospital. But what if something happened and she had to? Again, her earlier thoughts of how he planned on getting the money for it all surfaced through her mind, but she pushed it to the back of her mind for the time being. This was also something that she figured would have to be spoken about with his parents, because maybe, just maybe they would want, or even force, their help upon the situation. It may be their only chance, she figured. She just hoped that William would let them help if they said they were going to. She just hoped that his parents wouldn't stress him out either.

She blinked her eyes and looked away to look back down at the ground for a second, listening to what William said. So he wanted to talk about it, but he wanted to talk about it here, rather than back at the apartment. She felt as if she could understand. It seemed as if the apartment had been filled with more sadness than either of the two could handle for the moment. How was she supposed to stay there when William was gone? Finally, she did look back up at him, nodding her head in agreement. "I can take care of Jazzy while you're gone, so that'll be no issue. I just... Don't know what we'll do with her if I decide to spend the night there with you a few times, or even if I can. I don't really know how she's going to take all of this in general, to be honest, but I'll do my best to make sure that she eats and drinks her water every day, and I'll make sure that she'll walk and go outside for a little bit when she needs to." But then it brought another thought to her mind, one that caused her to look away for a second before she looked back at him.

"I have a shoot to go to on Saturday. I can be there with you in the morning, but I know I'll have to leave in the afternoon and I'll probably be gone for a few hours after that. But I'll see if I can come back to the hospital later that night. I just... I need to do that. I really don't want to, but I know I have to."
 
Poor Jazzy. William looked between his feet as Hope spoke about her. Jazzy looked back up at him and then put her head down once more, sighing. William looked back up at Hope afterwards. He was glad to hear that she'd take care of Jazzy. It was his second concern. Jazzy meant so much to him, he was hoping that Hope would volunteer rather than him asking, and she had. He moved to kiss her cheek again in thanks and gratitude.

"Okay. Thank you. If you're spending the night at the hospital, she'll be okay for a night. Weekends... we could always ask one of my friends." If they rotated who took care of Jazzy between friends, it wouldn't be such a hardship on anyone. Jazzy might not like it so much, but she could manage. "Seth couldn't, but Heather would jump at it. She takes care of shelter dogs anyway. Ruik could, but I'd use him as a last resort, he's too lazy for Jazzy. Lillianna and Aiden could do it too, but Castor is probably too invested in Tara to take care of a dog." Hopefully they wouldn't have kids any time soon, because they weren't ready for that, he was pretty sure.

When she said she had a photoshoot on Saturday, William instantly had conflicting emotions. He wanted her to take photoshoots, to do what she loved even while he was in the hospital. It was good for her, and he didn't want to just stop living her life because he was ill. At the same time, it was his first full day in the hospital... that was going to be... really hard. He hesitated, giving Hope's hand another squeeze. "Good." He said at last. "I hope its a wedding?"
 
Again, Hope nodded to her head as he listened to him talk about who could take care of Jazzy when he was away if she ever decided to spend more than one night at the hospital. It bothered and worried her, if only because she knew that Jazzy wouldn't like it very much and it would more than likely stress her out, but she knew that it was better than her just being at home by herself. Or maybe it would just be best for Hope to always be with her for the nights, because maybe that would keep the little dog from completely freaking out over the changes that were about to happen over the next month. "Okay, yeah. I think those people will be good, besides Castor and Tara anyway." Running a hand through her hair, she sighed. She thought that asking a few of her friends that lived in the area to look after Jazzy may be a good idea to ask if any of the people that William named off weren't available, but on second thought she decided against that. The only person she really would trust to do something like that was Emily, but the only reason why she didn't want to ask the woman was because she had two cats that hated other animals, or at least that was what she had been told. She didn't want to risk something like that, in all honesty. "We'll figure that out when it gets to that."

Hope looked back down at their joined hands when she felt him squeeze them again, causing her to give out a sad smile before she dropped the expression and brought back a neutral look. "No, it's not a wedding. Not this time. It's just an engagement photo shoot that we're going to do for this couple. Hopefully we'll be able to convince them to let us do their wedding though." She shrugged her shoulders at the thought, something like that being far from her mind because, really, to her it didn't matter anymore. Not until she knew that William was going to be okay. Nothing really mattered to her other than him at this point.

"What are you going to do about your parents, and even your sister?" There had been a pause between the two of them before she had spoken up, giving him a nervous look after the words had come from her mouth. "I'm sure they're not going to want to leave once, and if, they get here after you tell them."
 
William nodded. They could figure it out when it got to that. She was right. When she explained the photo shoot he nodded also. An engagement was close to a wedding at least, and hopefully the shoot would make her happy. She could use a bit of happy. "I'm glad you're getting that opportunity." He said. It was true. He was glad for that, even if he wished over and over that it wasn't that Saturday. There was nothing to be done about it now though.

When Hope askd about his family, he sighed and shook his head. "Its likely they'll all come down tomorrow..." He admitted, rubbing at his temples. "They'll want to stay, but I know they cant. Mom and dad still have their jobs, and my sister does too so..." He shrugged. "I don't know. I know... mom's going to flip out... she's going to badger the doctor too and I really don't want her to..." He chewed on his lower lip. How could he tell her not to though?
 
Right. The both of them figured that his parents and sister were going to come down tomorrow after hearing the new that he had cancer tonight, and that was something that she could understand. If she had a child and they ended up having cancer and she was told about it, she would be on her way as soon as she heard the word and there wouldn't have been anything her child could say to keep her away, or anyone for that matter. But then he brought up the fact that they had jobs, and while she knew and understood that, she wondered how many of their cares they would throw out the window to be with their son and brother. That wasn't something she could readily judge, mostly because they weren't her family and she had only been around them a few times, just as William had only been around her parents a few times. Tomorrow was going to be hard. Every day after this was going to be hard, and she knew that but she hated the thought. That wasn't how life was supposed to be lived, but when that was the way it went, what could she do?

Running another hand through her hair, she shook her head and shrugged her shoulders, unsure of what she could say to make him feel better about what his mother may do once she would get here and once they would get to the hospital. "Unfortunately, you may not be able to stop something like that from happening," she said softly, her lips turning down into a frown as she spoke. More than likely, if his mother was going to badger the doctor because of her worry over her son, that wasn't something that was going to change so easily. Not unless William told her that her doing that was making him feel worse, which may get her to stop, but that almost seemed like it was cruel to do. Unless, of course, her doing that really would end up making him sick. "But you know it'll only be because of their worry for you. You just- we just- have to try and make them calm so that they wont' panic." So that they wouldn't panic like she had as soon as he had been diagnosed with the cancer.

"But maybe she won't do that," she said, trying her best to be hopeful about the situation. "Maybe they'll be calm. Worried, but maybe they won't overreact. Or if they do, then you just have to tell them that you don't want them to do that, or at least not around you. I'm sure they'll listen." Like he was doing with her, Hope figured that he was going to have to talk to them to get them to understand how he wanted things done and how he didn't want them to do anything crazy when they were here. "You're just going to have to be honest with them, even if you hurt their feelings."

She tried to think of how her parents would react if she and William's roles were reversed. No doubt they would be worried, but there was a part of her that wondered if they would listen to anything she said or if they would try to do everything their way and get her to do what they wanted her to do, like go to a certain doctor and hospital and everything of the like. She didn't like to think that they would blame the cancer in her on something, but she couldn't help the lingering thought that they would probably try and blame her work on it all. But they weren't that stupid, she knew that. More than likely, if they ever did say that to her, it would only be because they were upset and they wanted something to be angry with. "I don't know though. Like you... I'm afraid of how they're going to react to it."
 
William took in a deep breath and then let it out slowly. When he thought about it, he seemed to be afraid of everything. How his family would react, how the treatment would be, staying away from Hope, how Jazzy was going to act, how his friends would eventually react, dying, not getting better and THEN dying, not being able to do anything that he used to if he recovered... there were so many things that William was suddenly afraid of, and William was rarely scared of anything. It was like his life was already turned upside down.

He picked up his tart to take a bite of what was left. He knew that Hope was right though. He was going to have to be honest with them. He just wasn't sure if he could be. It was one thing, to tell your friends or sister or girlfriend. A completely different thing to tell your parents what to do, or how to act. They were... well... your parents. He knew that they would act with his best interests at heart, but he just didn't think that it would work out well with them being down here.

Putting down the tart again, he barely had three bites left of it. He would finish it eventually, but he was stretching it to last through whatever conversations they would have here. "Are you... going to panic again?" He asked. He hated to ask her, but if things got worse or... well... he couldn't stand to see her panic in particular. It was hard to be strong when she panicked.
 
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