RANT RANT Your Brains Out #98274

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Cosmic Fey

Dragon Lord
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays, Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
Several Posts a Day, A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week, Slow As Molasses
My Usual Online Time
I'm usually on at points through out the day. Some days I'm not due to various reasons, but I try to give my partners warning if I'm going to be away for more than a day or two
Writing Levels
Intermediate, Adept, Advanced, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Female, Androgynous, Primarily Prefer Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
I can be both I suppose; It really depends on the storyline and plot of the RP, but I will always do my best to help push the story along
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Scifi, Modern, Magical, Horror, Romance, school-life... I'm really not picky as long as it has a good premise and plot.
Genre You DON'T Like
Furry, but that's about it really
"Not to sound scathing, but we have this conversation almost every time"

Yeah, but I am bad at math and the book wasn't the best at explaining shit. I also have a shit memory, its only my second session with this chracter, and our last session was three weeks ago. Of course I'm gonna have trouble. Would you prefer if I rolled without double checking and ended up fucking up?
 
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Adrian

Papa Bear
DONATING MEMBER
Roleplay Invitations
Group Roleplays, One on One Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts A Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week
Writing Levels
Give-No-Fucks, Adept, Advanced
Genders You Prefer Playing
No Preferences
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Aggressive
Favorite Genres
High Fantasy, Low Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Cyberpunk, Horror, LGBT+, Steampunk, Comedy, Post-apocalyptic, 80s, Thriller, Modern, Romance, Tragedy, Drama, Space Opera, Political Intrigue, Coming of Age
Genre You DON'T Like
Furry, Yaoi, Anime
It's really hard to function and do anything productive when my allergies are tryna kill me.

Can I just rip my nose off and be done with it? That'd be great.
 
Roleplay Invitations
Not Taking RP Invites at this Time
Just anxious mutterings.

Sent an email to the con I'm attending. They converted the forums to staff only and with it went the guest recommendation section. I'm a ball of nerves now because I really, really want SPG to come one of these years, but the con in previous years has not seemed very interested. I'm not even sure they take recommendations anymore, I mean it seems like something they'd keep open, but I've been scanning the site for days and finding nothing about it. And I have this nagging feeling at the back of my head that I'm just flat out annoying them with the same suggestion every year. Or the scenario that they do get manage to snag SPG, but then it turns out its too niche for the other attendees and the act flops.

*drowns sorrows in hot caramel cocoa and listens to Honeybee*
 
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays, Chat Roleplays, Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
Several Posts a Day, A Few Posts A Day, A Few Posts a Week
My Usual Online Time
Mornings, Afternoons and Evenings
Writing Levels
Intermediate, Adept, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Both
Favorite Genres
Action, Adventure, Romance, Magical, Fantasy, Furry, Modern, Supernatural, Naurto, RWBY, Fairy Tail, Pokemon, Avatar, Hunter
Genre You DON'T Like
Gore unless used properly
I could make a second home in this thread rant or in the counseling area maybe.

But that aside, anyone feel like no matter what check you do that your ideas are not interesting to ANYONE? That feel like the world is against you when you post your IDEAS and OPINIONS it is like the world has shunned you for voicing your side of things? ANYONE? No, just me then right?
 

Desert Bee

The Enemy Stand!!!
Roleplay Invitations
Group Roleplays, One on One Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts a Week
Writing Levels
Adept
Genders You Prefer Playing
Androgynous, Primarily Prefer Male
Not a fan of talking dismally or about myself, let alone both lol, but I just feel like putting this out there to maybe clear my head.

Been a number of months since I broke up with my boyfriend and I’ve never really gotten over it. He was sort of my stability in a life of chaotic family and mental illness, but we were separated after a move because my parents aren’t comfortable with their gay kid.

Been go to a doctor even before all that tho to help with my head cases, but it’s so exhausting to drive hours for a 5min appointment where I’m never comfortable to tell the truth. And the medicine keeps messing up my body.

We moved at a horrible time too to boot cuz I couldn’t get in this college semester so I feel like a bum. And my panic attacks keep spiking when I try to work, so I had to quit too.

And now my parents are divorcing on Christmas. I don’t really care about holidays mostly but it feels extra wrong, idk. I just feel like I’m stuck in circumstances always outside my control and that I’m going to always be alone I guess. Um, I think that’s about it.
 

Auuth

Crescent Grief
Genders You Prefer Playing
Primarily Prefer Male
Favorite Genres
Horror, Medieval, Fantasy, Mythology
Genre You DON'T Like
Romance, smut, etc.
To those who know me, know me.


It seems to grow more every day. This ulcer, in my heart, my mind, my soul. This wound which profusely excretes depression and anxiety, emotions all in general bad. And through my veins does it cause me to lose this will to be, that all living things should have. It started in my legs, the Sloth, laziness, as many know. The foundation of excuses building together inside of my mental, block by block. Closing my eyes I can feel the weight of every brick laid upon me, and I feel it in my chest.. Like I'm not allowed to breathe anymore.

It next began in my arms. Deleting posts I wish I could send, apologies left eaten, discarded due to negligence or pride. My will to exercise has dropped as well, though that is not too much of a concern to others, it was one of the greatest, wholesome activities I held up for quite some time. And to think those around me would've known, with how rampant this bitter heart rages, something was wrong. Why didn't they notice?

This poison, which stems from my heart, consumed me. And I rot in a reality which I am not meant to be in. I had a future, a precise line of goals, columns of achievements I paved a way towards- all ripped from my loving clutches in the snap of a moment.

And such is life?

To those of Faith, wanting to imagine that it was punishment I can assure you most greatly it was not. Because only until now have I acted out of humble nature, just in order to survive, sometimes even. I was so good, I WAS SO GOOD. And that is what angers me so much. This pathetic action in my life, throwing me down an endless depth, leaving nothing for me to do but slowly feel how painful it is to breathe anymore.

I was going to be a Marine. I was a strong, independent, man of God. I held life and love more sacredly than any other person I've ever met. I paid my dues, showed my graciousness, all for the dagger of random to be placed into my lower back. Only now do I see how ironic that statement is, considering the next topic at hand.

I was going to be so much, and now I am nothing. Beginning from a hip injury, which was brushed off by all those around me, convincing my own paranoid, reassurance-hungry self that my minor injuries would indeed pass. Three years go by. And now some days I will wake, NOW in the basement of my friend's parents' basement (Which I humbly appreciate every day, regardless of how depressing it is), with this immense pain, so great sometimes that I might not even rise to the day for another hour.

Have you ever felt that? To be handicapped? To rely on others for sustaining even self confidence anymore? I am NINETEEN. NINETEEN YEARS OF LIFE AND FRUITION FOR THIS?

Days I wake and I go to work at a simple job, which forever will feed off of my poor, miserable ambitions. I can see them, sometimes, starving, asking for any chance from a holy Father which chooses to neglect me. I grow both angry and depressed at the fact that now, when I am meant to go out and live, I am strucketh by ailment, which when everyone else labels temporary, has remained permanent for three years.


I tire of talking about myself, and I suppose I shall leave it at that. No, there is no happy, sunlit conclusion to my story. Hopefully, not yet.
 
Roleplay Invitations
Not Taking RP Invites at this Time
Our dog, our good girl had to be put down on New Year's Eve. She was strong-willed but ultimately the medicines could not stop the tumors that ate her immune system and her mind. I am thankful that I had my goodbye with her last night. I told her how much I loved her while I pet her to sleep. I had hoped perhaps a little too eagerly that she would be better by morning. Alas she was not.

I think the hardest part is knowing and coming to terms with the fact that her last alert moments were of fear. She'd lost control of her body and whined as anyone would do. We've always done the best we could for her so seeing her like that...it was hard. There's just no way to tell an animal what is happening when they encounter health problems. You just have to proceed with what is best for them.

I miss her.

I'm still doing the habits I needed to care for her. I've tried to take her outside, I've closed the bathroom door to make sure she doesn't get stuck behind the toilet during her episodes, I've even put my slippers on my chair so that she wouldn't trip on them. Only, she's not here. I'm impatient to move on and accept the truth to avoid the pain but my brain can't fathom it right now.

I don't think we'll get another dog. Not for awhile anyway. We already have 4 other animals. At least now my rabbit will be able to run around again. We've had to keep him in his cage since the dog's illness.

And on top of it all I'm catching a cold.
 

Kat

be kind
Roleplay Invitations
Not Taking RP Invites at this Time
Posting Speed
One Post a Week, Slow As Molasses
My Usual Online Time
Varies
Writing Levels
Advanced
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male, Female, Primarily Prefer Female
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Passive-Aggressive
2018 was tough. The beginning of 2019 seems to be tough as well, apart from the new year's party... I just wish I was better at understanding differences and confronting or coming to an informed consensus. Seems I'm the most tactless out of them all.
 
Roleplay Invitations
Not Taking RP Invites at this Time
My sister is complaining about me watching stuff with my niece. Before this past summer we hardly spoke to each, we just didn't have the same interests. Then one day I showed her a Studio Ghibli film, and Doctor Who, and things that I thought a teen would be into. We've really found common ground, but I guess that's something I should feel ashamed of. Heck, she hadn't even seen anything of Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter until about two months ago! I'm sorry, kid need more than just Disney and Minions in her life.

I know I've been hitting the Steam Powered Giraffe fandom particularly hard lately with my niece, but I'm in a grieving process and their music/skits give me a feeling of peace. It also drowns out my current minor auditory hallucinations i.e. dog whining, snoring, license jingling. I think I should be allowed to heal in my own house, in my own way. My niece certainly doesn't mind it. Heck, she requests to watch their vids when she comes over. I fail to see the issue.
 
Roleplay Invitations
Not Taking RP Invites at this Time
I snapped when I shouldn't have. It's just that I reached my boiling point on the topic and had to let it out. I don't think I hurt any feelings too badly, but only time will tell. I really should have kept to myself. It's just that a part of me wants to believe I can be honest with the people I trust, but sometimes honesty hurts the feelings of all parties.
 
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, Slow As Molasses
My Usual Online Time
AEST : 10am-10pm
Writing Levels
Give-No-Fucks, Elementary, Advanced, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male, Female, Transgender, Futanari, Androgynous, No Preferences
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
More Aggressive, can sometimes be Passive.
Favorite Genres
Action, Adventure, Animal, Apocalyptic, Comedy, Dystopian, Fantasy, Furry, Game, R. Harem, Horror, Modern Fantasy, Parody, Romance, Supernatural Modern
Genre You DON'T Like
Fandom, Pure Slice of Life, Cannon
Feelings like this come and go for me. I can udually fake it till I make it, but at this moment, all I feel like is a waste of space. Useless. I hate myself. I've messed up so much today..

I just feel like I can't do anything right or make anyone happy. I don't want to burden people with my thoughts, ones I know will pass in a day or two. But they feel so strong now, I don't know what to do with them..

Thank you for listening.
 

Adrian

Papa Bear
DONATING MEMBER
Roleplay Invitations
Group Roleplays, One on One Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts A Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week
Writing Levels
Give-No-Fucks, Adept, Advanced
Genders You Prefer Playing
No Preferences
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Aggressive
Favorite Genres
High Fantasy, Low Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Cyberpunk, Horror, LGBT+, Steampunk, Comedy, Post-apocalyptic, 80s, Thriller, Modern, Romance, Tragedy, Drama, Space Opera, Political Intrigue, Coming of Age
Genre You DON'T Like
Furry, Yaoi, Anime
The one good thing about alcohol is that it leaves you with a warm feeling.

Apart from that, god, it tastes like shit.
 

StareNation

Edgepeasant
DONATING MEMBER
Illustrious ball of madness
Roleplay Invitations
Group Roleplays, One on One Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week
Writing Levels
Adept, Advanced
Genders You Prefer Playing
Primarily Prefer Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
aggresive
Favorite Genres
romance, drama, slice of life, crime, horror, some fantasy
Genre You DON'T Like
fandoms
I never wanted to be back at this stage where I can't function. Everything is starting to ache now and the smallest triggers are sending me into loops that take so much energy just to get on top of. I resent my brain for my self loathing thoughts especially when all this time I have made leaps and bounds of success I can only think of how inadequate I am in everything. Really wanting a day of rainbows to come back soon and chase away this downright horrible feeling away
 

pythagoras

blue boy.
DONATING MEMBER
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays, Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week, Slow As Molasses
Writing Levels
Advanced, Prestige, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male, Female, Transgender, Androgynous, Primarily Prefer Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
as the role play gradually progresses I tend to become moderately aggressive since I have more of a feel for it, and I will throw ideas at you 24/7 be warned lmao
Genre You DON'T Like
furry , historical , yeah no
auditory schizo.
one of the most common things i hear is a little children giggling and laughing, and yes i sound like i’m borderline fucking berserk, i’m v aware of that. i know they aren’t real, but i always wonder what they’re laughing about and why, and they always seem to do it at the most inappropriate times, and they get even worse when i’m trying to sleep. it eats at me constantly, and its especially hard distinguishing what i’m actually hearing within my own head, compared to what everyone else can hear within the physical world. my mind is cluttered every second of the day, and i have a hard fucking time focusing, especially when they say unpleasant things. i wish they didn’t torment me 24/7 and at least say pleasant things sometimes lmfao
 
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays, Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
Several Posts a Day, A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week, Slow As Molasses
My Usual Online Time
I'm usually on at points through out the day. Some days I'm not due to various reasons, but I try to give my partners warning if I'm going to be away for more than a day or two
Writing Levels
Intermediate, Adept, Advanced, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Female, Androgynous, Primarily Prefer Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
I can be both I suppose; It really depends on the storyline and plot of the RP, but I will always do my best to help push the story along
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Scifi, Modern, Magical, Horror, Romance, school-life... I'm really not picky as long as it has a good premise and plot.
Genre You DON'T Like
Furry, but that's about it really
I'm cold.

Our upstairs neighbors are the ones who have control of the thermostat for the whole house, including the basement where I and some others rent some rooms. So we don't control the heat at all, they do.

They have the heat off.

It is the middle of January in Canada and they have the heat off.

The landlord has spoken to them, the city's sent people over to talk to them, but it doesn't matter, they only turn it on maybe once a week.

We don't pay for heat, it's included in the rent, so I don't know what their deal is, but I'm begging them to have some mercy on the ones who rent in the basement and turn on the heat.
 

GrunkleLogic

Destroyer of Worlds, Madman of Iwaku
Roleplay Invitations
Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
Several Posts a Day, A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week, Slow As Molasses
Writing Levels
Intermediate, Adept, Advanced, Adaptable
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male, Female, Transgender, Androgynous, Primarily Prefer Male
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Both Depending on Partner and Circumstances
Favorite Genres
Scifi, romance, slice of life, horror, slice of life
Genre You DON'T Like
Cannon, black & white morals
It's 28 C outside and my piece of shite neighbor left his pit bull, a thin coated dog breed, outside from this morning until now.

I'm not even mad that he's barking all the time, I would too. If you've done this to your dog before, shame on you. They are members of the family, not yard decouration.
 

Foxy

The Twin Fox
Roleplay Invitations
One on One Roleplays, Private Convo Roleplays
Posting Speed
A Few Posts A Day, One Post a Day, A Few Posts a Week, One Post a Week
My Usual Online Time
So I'm usually online in some form usually working on things or chatting with a buddy. I tend to respond as soon as I can if I'm not busy helping the family out, so just drop a line if you wanna talk or discuss a plot.
Writing Levels
Intermediate, Adept, Advanced
Genders You Prefer Playing
Male, Female, Transgender
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
I'm both. I don't mind taking the reins if it's needed and I have no trouble backing down for my partner to lead the story as well. BUT I will draw the line at being insulted or always having my ideas dismissed because someone wants the rp to go solely by their standards. If you can't play nice and fair and we can't work together as partners...it won't work out.
Favorite Genres
Romance, romance, romance! Seriously, I always have romance involved. I also like fantasy, scifi, action, adventure, modern, magical, horror, and post apocalyptic. If you have a genre not listed here please mention it! Maybe we can work something out!
Genre You DON'T Like
Um...I don't like rping purely one genre. We have to mix and match them up, you know?
I'm behind schedule, I haven't written replies, my work space and room are trashed because I can't work up the energy to clean anything up. My skin feels like bugs are crawling on it and oh my god I just wish going out and doing things with family and with other people didn't make me feel like I'm gonna freak out. Just like...ten minutes of peace from my issues would be lovely. x-x