Our Drunken Mistake...

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Shelby, Aug 24, 2013.

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  1. As he walked down the halls of the school, he couldn't help but feel all the eyes that stared at him, glowered at him, judged him, and all around shunned him. It wasn't right, he hated this feeling, yet he welcomed it. It was only right, right? To have so many people hate him. Believe him to be some type of disastrous being. To have ended the life of someone, someone so close to him, someone who had a great influence on so many of the students that littered the halls of this school. To her team, to all her other friends... He believed he should be thought like that.

    Why did it have to be her? Why couldn't it have been him? Why couldn't he have been the one to die that day? It wasn't even her fault. She wasn't even all for getting in the car after listening to the words of other people that tried to make them stay, but no, he had to push her to believe that nothing would happen, just like he always did with their group.

    To push the limits of things, to not have a care in the world about what would or could happen should he do something. A fool really, but that was who he was. Or who he used to be rather. But if he had listened to her, and everyone else, she would be here, right now, and he wouldn't be hurt. He wouldn't have hurt his other best friend either...

    Chance Smith sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, bruises still covering his caramel colored skin, scars from the glass that cut into his skin still present, permanent. He didn't try to hide them. There was no point; everyone knew already and it's not like he could change it. Oh but how he wished he could though.

    As the eighteen year old neared his locker he listened to the murmurs of the other students as he walked past them, his held held low out of shame, embarrassment. He felt guilty, ashamed, and all around devastated. He still had yet to get over the event, but it's not like being in this town, going to this school, seeing the people here and being around his family and her family didn't help much either. It continued to remind him of that day. That mistake.

    Chance could feel his throat beginning to tighten as thoughts of that night swirled around his mind. How things could have been different, how things could have been better. Now he was stuck in a life that he didn't want to live with anymore. The guilt was too much; he had lost too much. But taking himself out would be too easy. It wouldn't be right. But still...

    When he got to his locker he leaned against his, his head resting against the cold metal as he sighed.
  2. Katie Loyster walked into the door of the school, her hood pulled up over her head. Ever since that night she'd worn the same black hoodie. She ignored the sudden turn of people as they looked at her or completely ignored her. She had never thought she'd feel so...burned. Her mind and heart felt like they'd been tossed into a fire and spit back into her. She held her books tightly as she walked down the halls towards her locker. Her crimson red t-shirt was zipped up behind her jacket and her blue jeans swayed barely around her legs. She closed her eyes a moment, only a moment. She reached her locker and opened it quietly, switching her books. She stared at the pictures. She'd written so many letters..only to tape them in her locker. Her friend could not receive them..and never would. "I'm sorry." she whispered uselessly. She bit back a whimper of silent apologies and closed her locker. The door had critizism written all over it in sharpie. It had been repainted twice, but the school figured it was useless. She didn't move for several minutes, just stood there, holding a notebook up to her face. It had her best friend's name written everywhere in and on it.
  3. Though he hadn't been standing anywhere near the center of the hall, students bumped into him and when ever they did he would look up, only to see their sharp, criticizing gazes shooting right at him. It hurt, really it did, but he couldn't hate them for it. He couldn't grow angry with their hate. After all, had someone else been in his position, he might have done the same thing to them. It just made him wonder how the rest of the school year was going to go. Probably not good, and it was a shame too. Wasn't your senior year supposed to be the best year in high school?

    Tired of being bumped into, Chance finally decided to push himself off the locker and turned to walk back down the hall. But he stopped when he caught sight of a particular person, someone else that was close to him. He stopped, dead in the middle of the hall, finding it a bit funny that now people seemed to be avoiding him instead of bumping into him. No matter, he shook the thought off quickly and advanced towards the girl in the black hood, hesitating to say anything to her. They hadn't spoken since they found out about their friends death. Not that he's talked much to anyone, but still.

    It hurt to look at the writings that were painted on her locker, his eyes looking away almost as soon as he read some of the words. No one had done that to him, yet, though he wondered why she was being put through this torment. He hated it. She hadn't done anything wrong. She hadn't been the one driving the car. If anything, he should be receiving the most torment, or at least that's what he believed. He extended his arm out to her, his hand lightly touching her shoulder as he stared at the back of her head. "Katie..." He spoke, though it mostly came out as a murmur.
  4. Katie recognized the voice immediately, but took a moment to actually break from her silence. "Ch-chance." she mumbled as a hello. She closed her eyes a moment, letting her hands fall from her face and holding the notebook limply. She opened her eyes and turned, looking up into his face. It seemed like everyone was skirting around them now. The two outcasts. Katie felt tears threaten her eyes and dropped her head a little, her face once again covered in shadow. She held her books tightly in one hand, the notebook limply in her other hand. She shuddered slightly, biting her lower lip gently to keep from crying. When the tingling tears quit pushing the flood barriers in her tear ducts, she looked back up. Her eyes portrayed fear and apologies, as they had since that dreadful night. Every second she was awake, the memory was seared to the back of her eyelids and forced guilt to pulse through her. Every night when she forced herself to a restless sleep, she relived the memory again and again.
  5. She was a wreck, that much Chance could tell but just looking at her, watching her as she hesitated to even look up at him. Trying to hide back tears... At this point he had blocked out all the other people around them, his eyes trained on her, his thoughts on her and how she was probably dealing with this. Not in a good way, he assumed, and maybe worse than he felt about the situation. He looked at the books she held in one hand and the notebook that she held in the other. He say the outlines of their friends name on the notebook, his throat constricting as soon as he saw some of the letters. It made him want to cry, but like her he willed the emotion down, keeping the tears behind his eyes. He had cried enough at home anyway.

    He gulped before looking into her face, shaking his head slowly before his hand fell from her shoulder. He wondered if she hated him too, just like everyone else. But before he could think to do anything, even though he knew that this was probably a mistake, he enveloped her in a hug, his arms wrapping around her frame before he bent down to rest his chin on her shoulder. He shuddered, his hands clutching onto her back a little tighter to make sure that she was actually there, to make sure that she was actually alive. He closed his eyes tightly and breathed out a shaky breath. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry... You shouldn't have to go through this. It's not your fault."
  6. Katie was caught by surprise and stood there, frozen a moment, before letting her head fall against his shoulder, closing her eyes. She hugged him back gently. "It..It's not your fault either.." she said quietly. It was the most she'd said in so long..she felt like she was going to cry again, and a small, silent tear tracked her face. "I..I miss her..." She held him tighter, shaking a little now. The notebook slipped in her hand, falling to the ground. She left it there, not wanting to let go of the one person that had not left her to spiral out. She blinked slightly before closing her eyes again, the tears had disappeared again, not threatening to spill over.
  7. Chance opened his eyes back up when he heard something hit the ground, though he only let the thought wander in his mind for a second. It didn't matter anyway, and right now he couldn't really find himself to even care what it was that fell. Right now, he just wanted to focus on Katie. Maybe... Maybe he could make things a little better for her, though he doubted it. She was there when it happened, and she had been affected by this just as much as he had, despite how much he hated that fact.

    He found himself shaking his head and holding her closer to him before he sighed. "I miss her too... I think everyone does." That much he could be sure of. Others just used them, Katie and himself, as ways to try and push that emotion down, and by doing so they hurt them. Beat them even more to the ground. "But it is my fault. Mine more so than yours. They shouldn't be bothering you." He pulled back slightly to look down at her. "But... How are you holding up?"
  8. Katie took a deep breath just before he let go. She slipped her hands into her pockets. "I..I'm.." she sighed, she couldn't lie to him. "Not very well.." she said quietly. "You?" she looked into his eyes, refraining from hugging him again. He feels hurt.... just like me.. "It's not more your fault..I..so many things should have been done.." She choked on her words slightly and stopped, taking a deep breath. She picked up the notebook gently.
  9. He had figured that much, the fact that she wasn't doing that well. Chance just hoped that she was taking care of herself like she should. "Same," he answered softly, shrugging his shoulders as if it didn't really matter. Honestly he could care less about himself; he was more worried about others, what they thought of what, what they did to him and what they said to him. It was overwhelming, but now a days Chance found himself thinking more of others than he did himself. He tilted his head to look down, his eyes staring down at their shoes. "Yeah. Things should have been different." The words were bitter as they spilled from his lips, his own hatred towards himself evident.

    Just after he spoke his last words the bell signaling for first period to begin, making the boy pick his head up. He sighed, watching as the students filed out of the halls, some in a rush to get to class while others slowly made their way down the hall to their destination. For some reason Chance couldn't get his legs to move... "What class do you have first? I've got English." Maybe the distraction of school work would be good. Maybe it would distract him, even for just a moment, from everything around him.
  10. Katie didn't speak. She just stared at him. She looked expressionless, but in her mind she thought of everything she could have done to avoid this, to take everyone's pain away..

    The bell shook her from her thoughts. She glanced as everyone seemed to move, now with a new objective. She looked back at Chance. "English? Huh. I have that too.." she said in a quiet voice. Some passed by and glared at the two. She held the books tighter slightly. Katie then decided to move a little and took a step towards the class. "I..I guess we should go?" she asked quietly, giving him a questioning look.
  11. Chance took note of the expressionless look on Katie's face, making his own guilt grow. He had did this to her; he made her into this person now. He changed her, and he changed himself. He changed how everyone thought about him and viewed him...

    He sighed, nodding his head as he, too, took a step back and turned towards where the class would be at. Hardly any students were in the halls now, letting them know that if they didn't hurry they would be late for class, not that anyone would probably miss them but still. "Yeah, we better before we're late." He motioned for her to follow him as he started walking, his pace a bit slow, though it's not like the class was that far of a distance from where they once stood. By the time he made it to the door of the class the bell had just rung again, and as soon as he stepped into the room all eyes were targeted on him. He gulped, ducking his head low before he took a glance at the teacher, watching as she too had a heated gaze turned his way. So even the teachers considered him to be something disastrous?

    He shook the thought away quickly before ducking his head back down and heading to the back of the class in one of the last seats, sinking himself in the seat before he grabbed a notebook and pen out of his backpack.
  12. Katie followed close behind. He's so..strong about this.. She bit back a sigh. When the second bell rung, she pulled her hood back over her head, hiding her face. She didn't look at the others, not even the teacher. She sat next to Chance, pulling out her book and putting the others under her desk. She sighed silently and picked up a pencil, drawing a small flower at the top of the page. she did this a lot.
  13. Just like out in the hall, Chance could feel eyes on him, even as the teacher began to teach her lesson for the day. Was he really that interesting to think about? As of right now, probably, but it was probably more so because they wanted answers. Wanted to know why he did what he did, why he didn't stop when they told him to. Why he took the life of someone...

    So he had been wrong before, thinking that going to class was serve him as a distraction. It only made him realize all the more how he had messed up, especially with Katie sitting right next to them. Had the three of them been in a class together, they all would have been sitting next to each other, probably not paying attention to the lesson and instead engaging in their own conversation without the teacher knowing. But now it was only two of them. He glanced over at Katie, blinking as he watched her doddle something on her paper, a frown crossing his lips as he did so.

    Really that was all he had done for the course of the class. The teachers words were all a blur, and he couldn't much remember anything, much like he couldn't remember much of that night. When the bell rang he quickly gathered his things and slung his backpack over his shoulder and headed out the room, bypassing a lot of students before he stopped just outside of the door. He leaned against the wall, turning his head slightly to the side to see the students coming out, waiting for his one friend to come out.

    ((Hope I'm not moving things along too fast. I really wasn't sure what to do with being in class, so I kinda just moved passed it. Hope you don't mind.))
  14. ((nah, it's all good. =) It makes sense, I don't mind at all.))

    Katie was last to leave the class, as she didn't want to approach the other student. The teacher glared at her all the way out, but Katie didn't see, she wasn't looking. In fact, she almost missed Chance as she stepped out of the class. "I've got history next." she said, looking at him. "What's your next class?" they had five minutes.
  15. Chance jumped a little when he heard a voice beside him, happy to hear that it was only Katie though. He put his hands in his pockets then, thinking about what his schedule was before he responded back to her. "Not that... I think I've got Trig. now." That wasn't good, not by his standards. He didn't want to leave her, not by herself. He didn't want her to get tormented and pestered by the students, and possibly by the teachers.

    He tensed as the thoughts flooded through his mind, his eyes widening at the thought. It made him clench his hands together, but quickly he turned his gaze to look at the wall. He took a deep breath. "Do you want me to walk you there? I can if you want me to."
  16. Katie closed her eyes as someone bumped her slightly. She felt a little bad that Chance had a different class. "Uh..okay. S-sure." She said in the same quiet voice. She kept her head down. "Please." She said, looking at the ground. She felt slightly better she wouldn't have to leave him yet. The thought made her sick of herself. You shouldn't be happy.. She thought to herself.
  17. Chance looked at the person who bumped into Katie, watching as the guy chuckled under his breath, obviously pleased with his accomplishment. Now he understood what it was like to be bullied with. It wasn't a good feeling, and he knew that he couldn't feel any better with her. The guy even glanced back to look at him, sending Chance a glare, though the look held one that looked almost a little challenging. As if taunting him to do something to him, knowing that he wouldn't though. And he was right.

    He took his eyes off the boy, hearing a snort of mockery spew from the guys mouth as he walked away. The sound made Chance sigh, but soon after he hooked his arm around Katie's shoulders and started leading her down the hall towards her class. He was probably going to be late for his class, but he could care less about that. "Just don't pay attention to anyone. You didn't do anything. Don't let them hurt you..."
  18. Katie took a deep breath and rested her head on his shoulder. It felt better for him to be there. She didn't feel as lost, as hurt..as alone. She didn't speak to Chance, but let him guide her as she closed her eyes, listening to his voice and feeling his warm grasp around her shoulders. She sighed a little.
  19. Chance looked down when he felt Katie rest her head on his shoulders, a sinking feeling coming to the put of his stomach as he looked down at the girl. Once again the halls were beginning to grow less and less with students, not that he cared. He wondered if he should even bring her to the class; it worried him about what could happen to her with her being in there alone, without him watching. He sighed, looking up and seeing that they were only a few paces away from her history class. He stopped in his tracks at the door, not taking his arm off her shoulders. "Like I said before, don't let them bother you... Please don't." He asked her quietly, looking down at her. "I'll be waiting out here after class for you, if you want me to."
  20. Katie nodded, sighing as she lifted her head. She wanted him to be there when she came out. She didn't want to leave his side either though. But I don't have a choice, do I? She stood still, staring at the door. "I..I won't." she said quietly, telling Chance that she wouldn't let the others bother her, but already she could hear the whispered insults and feel her books knocked from her arms.. She closed her eyes, clearing her mind. She felt like she was falling for a moment, but when she opened her eyes, she hadn't moved at all. Something in her head whimpered, but she couldn't bring the noise to her lips to speak aloud.
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