Our Drunken Mistake...

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"No," Chance muttered, leaning forward to rest his forehead against his knees. "She didn't want to get in and everyone was telling us not to go, but I talked her into it, as well as you, and now look where we're at." His hands clenched into fist then, gritting his teeth in the process. "I-I didn't mean for it to happen, I really didn't! Why couldn't it have been me?" Again he sniffled, a tear escaping from his eye this time, the liquid trailing down his cheek. He started to tremble. "Why did this have to happen?"
 
Katie looked over at him after a moment. She leaned over, hugging him, her head on the back of his. "Chance..This is going to sound stupid.." she tried to think how to say it. "D-do you really think th-this would have happened without a reason?" she asked quietly, hugging him tightly. She didn't want to let him go. He was the only one who understood their position. The only other person in the world that knew what happened, and felt the same way she did. She closed her eyes.
 
Chance tensed a bit when Katie leaned against him, but soon his body relaxed, more out of habit then anything. He didn't pick his head up, though, but listened intently to what she had to say, his brows furrowing a bit after she stopped speaking. "But what could possibly be the reason as to why she had to die? No one... No one, especially not someone like her, should have gone out like that." But it did make him wonder whether or not that saying was true; all things happen for a reason. "It shouldn't have happened. Maybe there wasn't a reason for it. Or maybe," he hesitated, biting his lip before he let it go and sighed. "Maybe it happened to punish us."
 
Katie let these thoughts process through her head. She didn't know what to say for a few moments. "Maybe..maybe it didn't hurt her." she said quietly, finding her words again. "I..I don't think it was to punish us.." she let go of him. "I..I think it was a test." She looked down. "I don't think it was a punishment.." She shook her head. "There has to be a reason."
 
"Yeah, maybe it didn't." Hopefully she didn't feel any pain before she passed. But the doctors had said that she died on impact, so maybe it happened too quickly for her to be able to feel anything. If that was the case, he hoped that it happened that way.

Chance picked his head up then, scoffing a little before he shrugged. "A test? A test for what?" That didn't make any sense. "To see if we, or I, could drive a car drunk and not get any one of us hurt? Yeah, we completely failed that one." He turned his head to look away from Katie, this bitterness of his tone evident.
 
Katie shook her head, looking down again and hiding her face. "In the Bible it says God will test us..a-and that he h-has a reason for everything.." she stopped and shuddered a little, biting back a small cry. "I d-don't know w-why though.." she said quietly, biting her lower lip. "H-he might be t-testing us for some reason." She paused. "Nevermind..that's stupid." She covered her head with her arms, suddenly wishing she was back in her room that way she couldn't hurt anyone with her nonsense.
 
"But what could that test be?" Chance snorted, resting his chin against his arms that he crossed over his knees. "A test to see if we're strong enough to get through this; to see if we can get through all of this without feeling too guilty." Yeah, of that was the test they were being put through, then surely they were failing it. Still it upset him to think that they would be tested with something like this, something so hurtful and hard.

The mere through of it brought a spark of anger through his system, making Chance lift his head up to look into the sky. "It's not stupid..." He sighed.
 
Katie closed her eyes. "I don't know Chance...I r-really don't know." She stared at the darkness of the back of her eyelids, truthfully wondering just why they would be tested. She hated the idea, but it was the only one that seemed to make sense. She sighed silently, curling into a tighter clump to calm herself. It was as if maybe, if she crawled into a tight enough space, she could disappear. But that was impossible..she thought to herself. She opened her eyes, watching the small bit of grass she could see between her arms. It was such a beautiful green..unlike her. If she was a piece of grass, she'd be brown and broken. The thought made her wonder just exactly why they were in this situation. It had to have been for some reason. Things didn't happen without a reason, do they?
 
Chance sighed, and once again rested his chin on his knees as he looked out into the horizon. It was too bright for a day like this; it didn't seem right. Darkness and rain, thunderstorms and other things that brought terror to some people yet brought comfort to others. That's what he wanted to see, if only because it matched his mood at this point in time. It was too bright without her here... "I miss her," he spoke, his voice cracking as he blinked the tears away from his eyes. "D-do you think she hates us?" Was she watching over them now, laughing at their misfortune, glaring down at them just like everyone here did? Did she like the fact that they were suffering, losing everything and everyone who had ever been close to them? Was this really the price of losing one person? Losing everyone else in their lives except each other?
 
Katie looked up quietly as he said he missed her. She sighed silently. "We all do Chance.." She said softly. She looked down. "And no..I don't think she does.." She said even quieter. She bit her lower lip gently, closing her eyes as they heated from the salty tears that welled a little.
 
Again Chance snorted and shook his head. "I don't blame her if she does..." Or at least hate him if anything, since he still thought he was the main cause of the accident. "I'm sorry." He wrapped his arm around Katie's shoulders and leaned against her before he sighed. "I just... Wish there was something we could do; something that could change it."
 
Katie shifted a little closer to him, finding a little comfort in his closeness. She rested her head against his. "That..would be..great. But.." she sighed. "I don't know." she looked at the grass in front of them. It mocked them, being so cheery.
 
((Sorry, I thought I had replied to this before. Guess not.))

"Maybe there isn't anything we can do except sit here..." That made him feel pathetic, but really what could he do? Chance sighed before running a hand through his hair. "This just isn't right... I'm sorry. I just wish it hadn't happened."
 
((It's all good. =) ))

Katie bit her lower lip gently. "Chance...all of us wish that..but that's.." She closed her eyes, a small, tired sigh escaping from her. "that's just it..there's nothing we..nothing we can do."
 
"It's just that..." Chance grit his teeth before slamming his fist into the ground, bringing a little stinging sensation to his skin. He bent his head down. "I wish there was, or at least a way to get everyone off our backs about it. We didn't mean it, I didn't mean to do it. I should have listened to them..."
 
Katie flinched as he hit the ground with his hand. She hugged him gently. "What is done is done...We..w-we should have all listened to him.." she said softly, her eyes closed to keep herself calm..hopefully.
 
Chance tensed when Katie hugged him, his shoulders beginning to tremble before he shook his head. "We should just forget all of this... Forget about her, forget about everyone." At least then, he figured, things would be better. Or be better if everyone forgot about them.
As a thought crossed his mind he picked his head up and looked down at Katie. "Maybe we should just... Run away."
 
Katie stared into his eyes a moment, biting her lower lip gently. "M-maybe..." She said quietly, thinking. Maybe that's the only way out..forget and be forgotten... She looked down a moment. "Maybe.." she said again.
 
Quickly he stood up, shaking his head before he looked out ahead of him. "We have to.. I mean, think about it! If we leave this place people wouldn't criticize us anymore and we wouldn't have to deal with any of this anymore. We could be... Well again, maybe." But what would they do about school, he wondered, if they ran away? Not that he really thought about his education much anymore, but still? And what about their families? What would they think?

But really, why should they care about what others think about them when they're going through all of this now? "No one would miss us."
 
Katie looked at the ground, still thinking. "I..I guess you've got a point.." she said, starting to be convinced by his plan. "That..that sounds right.."
 
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