Epilogue
"It's the Slam Jam!"
Continued from
here.
From the shadows of... somewhere, the eccentric man known as Bill Murray made himself known to you all, a nonchalant expression on his face as he seemed to give off a more sinister vibe than before. Despite the fact that the men who described themselves as Murray's prisoners were standing before him, he seemed quite calm, if not just a tiny bit disappointed in you all.
"So... you discovered the real reason why I gathered you all here. No, it wasn't just because I wanted to see random people come from around the multiverse just to have fun and play basketball for the heck of it... Slam Spirit is a beautiful substance. One that I couldn't just let go to waste on retired has-beens like old Michael, Yao, and Charlie here," he said with something of a disinterested tone, before taking a small breath and taking a glance at his drink, and then continuing.
"However, it's a very volatile and unstable substance. An unregulated drop has the potential to overload someone with spirit and destroy them from the inside out, but when you fine-tune it very carefully, it does wonders. Like steroids, but without the after-effects," Bill Murray explained, taking a sip of the beverage.
"But why, Bill?!" Michael Jordan exclaimed dramatically,
"We were friends! If it wasn't for you, Bugs, Taz, everyone... We wouldn't have been able to beat the Nerdlucks without your help! So why?! You know how dangerous the Slam Spirit can be!"
"That's a very good question, Bill. Remember back then... Right before the Nerdlucks showed up! You remember that nice conversation we had, playing golf with the fellas? Do you remember, Michael?"
"Golf... Yeah, I remember," Michael nodded, crossing his arms,
"But what about it?"
"No, no, no... You really don't remember, do you? Lemme refresh you just a bit!"
- - -
FLASHBACK - 20 YEARS AGO
The golf field was quite relaxing. The grass was beautifully green, the sun was shining brightly, and the air smelled of dog shit and flies, just like a typical, laid-back day in the park.
"You think I got a shot?" Bill asked Michael. After Michael had initially retired from basketball to pursue (unsuccessfully) a career in baseball, the unassuming Bill Murray decided that perhaps... it was time for him to get another shot at fame too! No one really cared for him after Ghostbusters 2, so maybe if he could be in the limelight, at least one more time...
Upon asking the question, Bill would be met by nothing but a smirk. A patronizing look from Michael, as though the star almost wanted to laugh at him. It pained Bill more than anything. When even your friend laughs at your dreams...
"No," the resounding word that resonated within Bill Murray's mind, even twenty years later. At the time, he had thought nothing of the negative response, and doubled up with another quip.
"It's because I'm white, ain't it?!"
...
Michael shifted uncomfortably. That must be it!
Little did Michael Jordan realize, little did he ever take any thought to, that on that day, he nearly crushed Bill Murray's dreams like an ant beneath a boot. But on that day, while a man of childlike hope died, a man with a plan was born.
Even if he had helped Michael and the Looney Tunes beat the Nerdlucks all those years ago, Bill wondered... When was it going to be his time? He'd be damned before he'd let himself stay as a ref for the rest of his life. No, no, no!
Bill Murray was going to be a basketball star, one way or another! This, he would make sure to see through to the end!
- - -
"Aaah... Now, I have to kill all of you! Now that you've found out about my master plan to siphon Slam Spirit into you all and have you all become my team of loyal, obedient slammers, with me as the MVP once I made absolutely sure that it was safe, it's time for you all to go!"
"Oh yeah? How do you think you're gonna take you all on?!" Yao Ming asked skeptically.
"It's simple. Even though you're way bigger than me, all the Slam Spirit I siphoned out of you has made you far weaker! Just look at Barkley over there! You might not know it, but I bet at this point, you wouldn't even be able to make a mark if you were to punch wet mud and--"
BLAM.
Bill Murray got knocked the fuck out when Michael Jordan decided to walk up and just punch him in the face
...
That was anticlimactic, but is anyone complaining?
"Guess in that case, you're lower than dirt, Bill."
Zing?
Without missing a beat, Michael would kneel down besides Bill's unconscious body, digging through and searching around, as though looking for something, before grinning widely with an
"Aha!"
Standing up, holding a strange looking device in his hand, Michael would press the one button on it, and suddenly, a portal would pop up, appearing before you all.
"That guy... Carrying such a weird thing with him. I wonder if there was another way, but... At this point, he's been gone for too long at this point. Anyway, you guys are free now. You can go home and be free again. No more jams, no more slams. Just back to your ordinary life. Go on then, off you go!"
"Thanks for everything. Without you guys, we wouldn't have been able to be set free and stop Bill. Who knows how far he would have gone? If left unchecked, he probably would have ended up trying to form a small army of slam spirit super soldiers, but... I won't entertain the thought any further..."
"We'll take it from here. Just think of today as the weirdest Tuesday ever, alright? Alright."
The end <3
~CAST LIST~
@DapperDogman as
Wild Dog (DC Comics)
@Krieg as
Ty-kun (OC)
@The Tactician as
Isaiah Mustafa (Old Spice)
@Archmage Jeremiah as
Fluttershy (My Little Pony)
@C.T. as
Revy (Black Lagoon)
@Bomb as
Delphox (Pokemon)
@Hospes as
Princess Buttercup (The Princess Bride)
@BarrenThin as
Darth Shen (Star Wars)
@Kakarot! as
Roberta (Black Lagoon)
@york as
Tomoyo Sakagami (Clannad)
@Sen as
Emalf (The Gray Garden)
@Hana as
Reficul (The Gray Garden)
@Gwazi Magnum as
Terry Crews (Old Spice)
@The Great Detective as
Coral (Splatoon)
@Kaykay as
Eruna Ichinomiya (Mikagura Gakuen Kumikyoku)
@Jeremi as
Blacker Baron (Anarchy Reigns)
@Lizzy as
Blue (Wolf's Rain)
@DBZ7 as
Eda (Black Lagoon)
@Schnee Corp Lawyer as
Tiara (Fairy Fencer F)
@The Silver Paladin as
Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell)
@Crow as
Mirei Hayasaka (iDOLM@STER)
@Yatagarasu as
Jeanne (Bayonetta)
@ResistingTheEnlightened as
Robert Lutece (BioShock)
@Saint Guillotine as
Darius (League of Legends)
@Atomyk as
Cole MacGrath (inFamous)
