A Wolf Among The Sheep

Ronan, despite the festivities going on quite loudly around him, had actually struggled to stay awake throughout the evening. The toll of the day was beginning to catch up on the capture, wounded werewolf, leaving him to now and again startle awake and wonder just how much he had missed. Not that his fellow capture pack members really cared, they were either focused on staying awake themselves, their own injuries, or trying not to stare too blatantly at the honey-glazed pork roasting over the fire. In all honesty, when he was awake, Ronan could understand why it was so difficult.

Juices dripped from the pork meat only to sizzle onto the fire heated stones, carving knives seemed to cut through it like butter and the sweet scent of the pork kept wafting over every so often, leaving his stomach to growl painfully.

But at least they provided the stew. That was an act that Ronan simply didn't expect from the pack that only hours early tore theirs to pieces. He had cupped his bound hands at the base of the bowl that had been provided, lifting it to his lips and hungrily downed the contents. He savoured each bite of vegetable that was in there and tried to imagine that they were pieces of the pork that had been devoured by their captors.

It was a slight relief when the festivities slowly came to an end, families with young children being the first to head to bed and then the older mated pairs. However Ronan couldn't care about any of them, instead allowing his eyes to return to his mate.

Each time he had looked over to Anders throughout the night, he never seemed to be looking back. The reality of it did hurt, it stung in his chest and made him glare at the ground. However he knew that, only a day or so ago, their roles had been reversed. He understood that Anders' behaviour was necessary to keep their secret safe. Ronan too hadn't been sure how his pack would react at the news, and had been nervous about what would be the most poorly received - the fact that his mate was another male, or the fact that he was from a different pack, a pack that they viewed as the enemy.

Ronan continued to tell himself that Anders' disregard for him wasn't because he wasn't wanted as a mate - their care for each other back at Ronan's pack obviously saying otherwise - but because it was too risky. He could only hope that his mate would come out to see him once everyone else had gone to bed, as he had once done.

He sensed Anders before he saw him, considering he was dozing lightly while his mate approached. As the familiar, comforting scent of his mate neared, Ronan blinked himself awake and sat up. He glanced across to his other pack members, relieved to see them all also out for the count.

He chuckled softly at his ramblings, eyes searching his face as Anders' worked on the ropes. "It's alright, Anders. It's no secret your brother got me good but at least your pack let us get seen by your healers."

Once released, Ronan gently rubbed at his wrists, watching his mate's movements before his mouth dropped open at the sight of the little parcel. Maybe little, but it meant a lot. He took it tentatively and brought it up to his nose, taking a deep breath in of the smell before releasing a small groan of appreciation. As he unwrapped the parcel, he looked up to Anders, stomach grumbling. He paused, eyes searching the area before motioning for him to get closer.

"Hug me on my good side, then. That way you don't need to worry." He grinned lightly, bringing up his good arm ready to wrap around Anders and bring his mate closer to his side, "But hurry up, 'cause this pork meat is smelling too good to wait for."
 
Even though offering his mate some affection was all he wanted to do, and even if he had been the one to raise the suggestion, Anders peered around anxiously and hesitated from acting on something he desired so much because of the fear of being caught. Like the other, he didn't quite know what would go down worse amongst his pack - the news that he was mates with someone from the enemy pack, or the fact that that mate wasn't female.

The former was definitely a piece of information that would go down extremely poorly, no doubt incurring the wrath of everyone in the pack. He couldn't help who his mate was but that fact would undoubtedly be overlooked by the anger and even a sense of betrayal that his friends and family would feel. The latter, however, was something he couldn't necessarily pinpoint the reaction to. They could be confused at the idea that his mate wasn't female when the very idea of finding a mate was to settle down and start a family - that was how things had always been, after all.

Perhaps they would think that he was confused; that this was simply attraction and they weren't soulmates destined for one another. That Anders would eventually bond with a girl in the pack and realise that that was who his mate was; not some guy from another pack. That wouldn't just be upsetting; it would be insulting, as though he was confused as to the depth of the feelings a mate had for another and that he could only experience that with a girl, because that was just how things were.

Either way, no matter how they reacted, he knew they wouldn't congratulate him like they had done with Tate and Clarissa; his news wouldn't be met with smiles and playful teases. It would be tense, awkward and upsetting - which was why keeping it a secret, for now, was the only way he could enjoy being with Ronan without it ruined by the reactions of others.

Despite fearing that someone might stumble onto the scene and discover them, or that the other captives would stir and wake from their slumber, Anders leaned forward to hold his mate in a hug - other mates had enjoyed the night together, so he felt he was allowed to at least hug his own, even if that small gesture of affection was incredibly risky. Though aware of the risk, Anders pressed a light kiss to his mate's cheek, eventually forcing himself to sit back opposite him. The scent of the other staining his skin made him smile contently, wanting to cover himself in it - but he knew it was irresponsible to do that if they wanted their secret to remain just that.

"Go on, eat up then. Don't need you staring longingly at that any longer than you gotta," the other wolf grinned as he quietly leaned back with his palms on the ground, using that position to then stretch out his legs to get as casual as he could. If it wasn't for the fact the ropes remained in his eyesight and the other captives were nearby, Anders could almost delude himself into thinking this was some romantic moment with his mate, out by the fire and underneath the blanket of stars.

"...I could tell them, you know. About us. They'd have t' let 'ya out of the ropes then. They might not let 'ya come and sleep in my hut with me, not if they react real badly, but I... I'd sneak you in. You wouldn't have to be out here, eating fuckin' scraps of meat. We could hug each other without me sneakin' out at 3 in the morning. We could-- kiss without all this bullshit secrecy, Ronan. That'd be nice, huh? To be mates an' do normal shit without hiding how we feel?"
 
Ronan paused in his unwrapping of the meat that Anders managed to bring him, so close to having it in his grasp that the grease from the meat was beginning to stain his fingers. He kept his eyes on the food, contemplating the offer as that instantly became more important than the food. Eventually he started to move again, but slower than before. He allowed the offer to hang in the air between them, still uncertain about whether or not to take his mate up on it.

"They wouldn't have to do anything. If anythin', they might want to keep me tied up for longer cause they might think I've gotten in t' your head." He muttered, picking up some of the meat and popping it into his mouth. A soft groan of appreciation sounded soon after, eyes flickering closed at the taste of the sweet honey and the saltiness of the pork. As he chewed, he looked back up to his mate, hesitating, "I want that to happen, Anders, I really do. You know that, right? I'd-- I'd want nothing more than to be able to share a hut with you and not have to... fuckin' hide any of this. But I also don't want this to hurt you, Anders."

Ronan spoke the truth, he had no reason to lie to his mate. While he was, of course, shocked at first to find out his mate wasn't female, it did make sense. Not to mention, that bond that brought them together made it impossible to even think about lying to Anders. Although Ronan put it down to those eyes of his, like a puppy-dog that you didn't want to deceive.

He wanted nothing more than to be able to sleep in a bed, in a hut, shared with Anders. To hold his mate the way that he saw other pairs holding each other that evening. The softer part of him just wanted the opportunity to hold his mate until their scents intermixed and become stained on each other's bodies. The primal side of him wanted to see his mark, his claim, on the other's throat.

Savouring a few more pieces of the pork, he finally decided to try explaining again, giving Anders his gaze. "How understandin' do you think your pack will be, Anders? I don't-- I just don't want you ruining all your relationships here, with your family, with your friends, because of me. I... I'm happy to stay tied up, so long as it keeps you... safe." He didn't dare say happy, since it was obvious that neither of them would be happy if they couldn't really be together. "I'm just as scared as you are, Anders, about what people are goin' say but... we can face it together, right?"
 
  • Like
Reactions: potassiumboron
The moment Ronan voiced his concerns was the moment Anders realised that he couldn't let his pack know. However understanding they might be (though that probably wasn't going to happen), there was still the chance that that good faith was only going to be shown to him. They might accept understand that he wasn't interested in the girls in the pack and see his preferences as valid without believing that he loved Ronan; that they were mates. They could easily do just as Ronan feared by punishing him more, as though he had somehow brainwashed Anders, taking advantage of his trusting nature.

Their feelings had grew naturally over the two weeks he had been at the other's pack, the spark between them the exact same as the one that had occurred between every other pair of mates. The idea that that might be belittled made Anders angry, his jaw tightening as he considered how his pack might not give him and his mate the respect they deserved because he was from an enemy pack - and because he was male. It wasn't a definite, but the fact he could actually see his friends and family reacting like that said it all.

He loved them all dearly but the hatred they held for the other pack was intense - how would they ever believe that Ronan loved him when it was probably easier for them to believe that he was cruelly playing some prank on Anders, capitalising on his trusting nature to hurt him and, after gaining an in on the pack, hurt everyone he cared for. It just wasn't the truth but who would believe that?

Nobody would accept Anders' relationship when they could instead accept Anders as the victim of the enemy's manipulation.

"...They... I don't... they'd hate you more than they do now," he eventually admitted as he forced the surge of anger back, even if the emotion was just immediately replaced with more sadness. He knew what he felt was real and valid; it was special and no less authentic than everyone else's relationships. Just because being with a male was seen as being antithetical to what a mate encompassed, and just because his bond had formed with someone beyond the boundaries of their pack, didn't mean it wasn't real.

Though who would honestly listen to any of that when it was easier to believe a falsehood that demonised the enemy even more?

"We can't tell them, they'll kill you. They'll think you got into my head, right? An' they'll kill 'ya. And that'd-- I can't live without 'ya," he frowned as he reached forward to rest a hand on his mate's, needing that comfort desperately when every part of him wanted to give into the rising sadness and just cry about how unfair their predicament was.

"I ain't having 'em hurt you more than they already have. I... I don't want them knowing about us yet but if they go to hurt 'ya, I'll fucking stop 'em. I'll do what I gotta do to protect you, alright? Even if Tate tries to mess with you, fucking try to assert his authority or whatever, I... I'll stop him. He knows I will too, I've attacked him over much less," he promised as he offered his mate's hand a squeeze, the protectiveness on display rising from the fear that his mate could get hurt - and even someone gentle like Anders was willing to fight to the death to protect his mate from harm.

"The, ah... the baby's doing well," he eventually murmured, just to give them something else to talk about other than the unfairness of their situation. "She's such a cutie, you know. They probably won't let me look after her for long, they want Gio and Sasha to get some practise in, but-- she likes me a lot, she just stares up at me an' she's so quiet, doesn't stir or cry or anythin'. I reckon I'm doin' a good job~ I ain't good at much, I know I ain't smart or tactical an' all that, but I... I'm good at looking after people. Babies too, apparently."
 
  • Sweet
Reactions: Viverescribere
It was difficult to watch Anders go through the same realisation that he had when they were both still with his pack. Ronan had been quick to see what Anders was realising when their roles had been reversed - while he knew his pack wouldn't think he was duped, they would still come up with some sort of reason or excuse to belittle his emotions and keep him away from Anders.

A small smile appeared on his lips as Anders' hand came to rest over his, and Ronan was quick to place his other hand on top. He brought it up to his lips to kiss his knuckles, holding his hand against his lips for a breath longer before lowering it back down. "Hopefully somethin' will work in our favour soon-- I don't know when, or how, but we're mates. You're my soulmate, Anders. We're meant to be and somehow, one day, we'll be able to be together without hidin' a thing. I believe that, I really do."

Ronan was slightly amused to hear of Anders' promise to stop his alpha from hurting him, having witnessed the soft and gentle side to his mate, he had no idea just what had occurred before he had been kidnapped. So the idea of him raising any fists in his defence was rather amusing. However he knew better than to dismiss the claims entirely. The strength in his mate's voice making him pause and realise that the truth was being spoken within his words. So Ronan gave his hand a gentle squeeze after finishing the last of the pork, the grease of which rubbed off his fingers in the grass.

"I don't want you ruinin' your relationship with your family over me," he murmured, looking imploringly at Anders, "If... if we are to tell them, you're goin' to need their support. You don't need to lose it by bloodin' your knuckles cause I can't keep my mouth shut." His hand then moved from Anders' hand to his cheek, cupping it.

Of course seeing conflict in the ranks would be slightly pleasing - they were enemies now, after all. But if that conflict was caused by his mate, who could become hurt or punished for such behaviour... Ronan would much prefer to take whatever came his way rather than see Anders suffer.

Removing his hand to avoid his scent becoming too prominent on Anders' skin, Ronan balled up the paper that once held the strips of meat before passing it back to Anders so it could be disposed of in the fire.

"You look great with her," he admitted, smiling warmly as those images came back to his mind, "Not that a baby is an accessory or anythin'-- no, I mean-- I just thought, when I saw you with her... I thought that you'd make a crackin' dad someday, Anders. I can't deny that seeing you with that baby... it just made me think... of what we could have some day, should everythin' go right."
 
Though he was completely genuine in his promises to defend the other against any and all attempts by his pack to intimidate or hurt him, there was the fact that he would be burning bridges with them all in the process to contend with. His family was everything to him - not just his immediate members, but the pack as a whole. He couldn't ever fathom incurring their wrath and making them hate him; hell, the idea of just annoying them made him squirm uncomfortable. Anders had always had an innate desire to please people and to be liked, and losing all of that, all the love and support of those he cared for, made his anxiety spike.

But if there was a choice, he would always defend his mate regardless of the consequences; how could he not? The man was his soulmate; the person the gods had decided was his other half. He would defend him from harm even if it meant losing everything he had because that was what mates did. If he had nobody else to rely on, he always knew he would have Ronan fighting his corner with him - and thus, there really was no debate to be had.

Of course, he wanted to avoid losing his family and bringing more hatred onto Ronan's shoulders, hence the decision not to reveal their status as mates just yet, but one day he knew he would tell them all and face whatever came his way as a result. Hopefully by then, Ronan wouldn't be tied up and made an easy target for anger, that being one of many reasons why Andres was reluctant to open up just yet - he wanted his boyfriend to be able to defend himself if there was an explosion of outrage.

"...I guess I've never thought about kids. I've always known I was, y'know - not into girls or anythin' so I was sorta just focusing on being an uncle one day, whenever one of my brothers or Daisy had a kid, but-- yeah. Yeah, I... reckon I'd be a good Dad. I wouldn't be harsh or judgemental an' I'd let 'em be who they wanted to be an'... and I'd teach 'em how to fish and hunt. And I'd teach 'em about the stars - I don't know any of the proper names but we could make 'em up, 'cos creativity's important, my Ma always said that," he babbled, clearly eager to hold onto the topic that brought some happiness into their conversation; something happy and sweet to give their attention to rather than focus on the hurt and unfairness that had dominated their discussion until now.

"And you'd be fantastic too, y'know; you're tough but you're a teddy bear, ain't 'ya? An' I know any kid we had would just admire the hell outta 'ya, you'd be their hero, for good reason. You're pretty amazing," he beamed as he shuffled in closer, contemplating for all of one second before leaning in to press a kiss to his lips - though before the contact could be made, a noise in amongst the trees nearby broke his focus. It could easily just be the natural sounds of the forest, an animal wandering about in the darkness, but it could also be a member of the pack returning from a late night walk.

Why anyone would be wandering about in the early hours in the dark was bewildering -and therefore unlikely- but Anders didn't want to risk it, quietly leaning forward to return the ropes around his boyfriend, mumbling an apology at how tight they had to be. He wanted to keep them a little loose, to give Ronan less discomfort, but if anyone discovered how loose the ropes were there would be outrage - and he didn't want to bring a harsh interrogation on someone in the pack who didn't deserve it.

"I gotta get back to bed, I... I'll see 'ya in the mornin', alright? Just... get some sleep if you can, and... and I'll see you later. I-- I love 'ya, don't forget that, okay?"
 
A smile once more crept along Ronan's lips as his mate babbled on in front of him, and he was more than happy to sit there and enjoy it. Having not been much of a talker before Anders turned up, Ronan wondered if that was another reason why they were so suited - Anders could do most of the talking, and Ronan could just sit and listen to all that his mate had to say. Not that he wouldn't participate in conversation, but it was actually quite adorable the way Anders rambled on, clearly happy to have found a topic that was light.

"Best not call me teddy bear in public, Anders. I have a reputation to uphold." He smirked, raising a hand to ruffle his hair before sweeping it back off his face, "Can't be havin' anyone know the truth, only you." His hands then outstretched toward Anders as he leaned forward, eager to meet his lips with his own but having to swallow back a growl of frustration as his mate quickly scarpered back.

He had heard the noise too, and knew it was better to be safe than sorry, but it was still disappointing. He wanted nothing more than to finally kiss his mate properly, but knew that if that noise belonged to a passing pack member, then their secret would be out and all hell would break loose.

Ronan watched and suppressed a wince at the tightness of the binds, knowing that would only cause Anders to feel guilt he didn't deserve to feel. It wasn't his fault that the binds had to be secured, nor was it his fault that things had ended up the way they had done. He looked up to Anders and reached to squeeze his hand between his bound ones in an attempt to reassure him that all would be fine.

"See ya in the mornin'... I... I love you too. Oh, and Anders? Dream of me tonight, would ya? Cause I'll be dreamin' of you." Ronan added a cheek wink, moving to settle down for the night, although with the lack of comfort, it may be harder than expected.

His eyes would remain on his mate as he left, unwilling and unable to take them from his retreating form. Even lingering on the door of the hut for a few breaths after he had gone inside. With a heavy sigh, Ronan shifted to lay on his side, curling up tightly in an attempt to keep as much body heat as possible.
 
Returning to bed without the comfort of his mate at his side was almost torturous for Anders as he reluctantly clambered back onto his bunk and settled down for the night. He had never known what it was like to be able to lay in bed beside his mate; something that was so simple that many other mates were able to enjoy but that was seemingly impossible for him and Ronan. It annoyed him to no end to know that they had had to hide their bond from each of their packs in fear of the response - and as loving as his own pack were towards him, Anders had no doubt that there'd be members of it who would try to hurt Ronan in mistaking him as some big manipulator taking advantage.

That was why they couldn't do anything. Why they had to interact at the dead of the night with nobody else around and still feel too nervous to even offer a kiss to one another in thinking that someone could walk out at that exact time and catch them. While other mates curled up beside one another in the comfort of their bed, Anders was left alone in his own, his mate tied up and left outside like the enemy his pack believed him to be.

In contrast, Tate got to experience spending the entire night at his mate's side. Though he had been trying not to for a couple of days prior to that evening as a result of Sasha's warning about the heat and its consequences, the call of his mate had clearly been too tempting to resist a second further and though he feared he would wake in the morning with the heavy sense of regret weighing on him, he surprisingly didn't. What they had done wasn't wrong and certainly wasn't regrettable when it was easily one of the best nights he had shared with Clarissa. Regretting even a second of it was something he would never do - and though the consequences briefly crossed his mind, he had come to the conclusion that being with Clarissa was worth whatever consequences came later.

He had gone ahead with being with her during her heat and he would take full responsibility for whatever might or might not happen next. Either way, he had loved every minute he shared with her and with the reverberations of pleasure still tingling at his skin despite having been asleep for the past few hours, the alpha leaned across to wake his mate up with a kiss to her forehead, an arm wrapping lazily around her waist to pull her in close.

"Mornin'," he hummed appreciatively as he let his lips linger above her ear, eventually placing a quick kiss there with a chuckle. There was no immediate urgency to leave the comfort of his bed but, having skipped out on the celebrations the night before, he knew he had to make an appearance at breakfast, if only to interrogate the alpha he had tied up with the other strangers.

"...I really gotta get goin' for breakfast, darlin'. Do you reckon you can make it out today, around us all, without sending all the unmated guys crazy?" He snorted, resting up against the headboard of the bed with a faint groan, stretching his arms out to relieve a little aching in the muscles. "Cos I dunno a lot about all this heat stuff but... I think we might have put it at bay for a while, y'know? We did enough last night for that to be the case, but I dunno - how do you feel? Any calmer or still as hungry for me as ever~?"
 
Clarissa hummed appreciatively at the arm around her waist, a lazy grin appearing on her features as she felt his body press against her back. A shiver then chased up her spine at his voice near her ear, lips grazing against it with his words and immediately her head was tilting to over him the side of her throat. However, when all she got was a kiss to her ear and nothing else, she whined with playful annoyance.

A matching frown then soon appeared as he released her to sit up, a soft 'humph' accompanying it but she couldn't play mad for long, another smirk taking over her expression as she watched him stretch. There were a few muscles of her own that were complaining after the exploits of last night, but she was hardly going to complain. With her enhanced healing, her wounds were already shallower than before and didn't cause as much pain. However, that being said, her mind went to the injury he had on his side and she rolled onto her front to prop herself up on her elbows.

"I may have been untruthful last night, darlin'. My heat went away after the first round, like I said, I was just bein' selfish in wantin' to keep you to myself." Clarissa smirked up at him, chin resting in her hand, "As for that other thing you said," she leaned up with her hands pressing flat against the bed to leave a handful of kisses trailing over his collarbone to his mark, "I'm always goin' be hungry for you."

With a final kiss to his mark, she rolled away to pull herself out of bed. Her skin, now so much cooler and a lot less sensitive, didn't react in irritation to the slip she pulled on to cover herself. From there, she went through the set of drawers they had to fetch out some more paste and bandages. "Sasha brought me some while you were gone. Good thing too." She explained, walking around to his side of the bed and kneel down so she was level with his injury.

"Now, don't fuss and don't squirm. If you're going back out there to start interrogatin', you're goin' need a fresh set of bandages. Don't argue, either, as a matter of fact. Although I bet you did this on purpose, didn't ya? Satisfy my heat just so you had someone to take care of ya." She teased, grinning as she motioned for him to lean forward, "Come on then, haven't got all day."
 
"You think I'd purposely satisfy 'ya heat just so I got someone to take care of me? That's a pretty fuckin' cynical way of looking at this, I'm offended," he playfully huffed, his arms folding across his chest in faux disappointment, the equally feigned seriousness ending when he cracked a grin. He hadn't rushed into the hut and taken Clarissa in his arms with any thought towards the benefits he could later on get from it, but he wasn't about to deny that having her more focused and able to help him out with his injury wasn't a considerable advantage of it all.

If there was anything to prove just how far they had come in their relationship, it was Tate's ability to show her the injury and accept her help without complaint. He might not have wanted to admit that he had an injury, wanting to save her from the concern she would inevitably show him, but she knew about it now - there was little point in pretending it didn't hurt and that he didn't need her help in applying the herbal paste. At the start of their relationship, shortly after discovering their bond to one another, he would stubbornly proclaim that he didn't need the assistance; that he could do it all by himself and that there was no need for her to fret over him.

Now, he was more than happy to show her the injury and accept the help she was offering - showing vulnerability to his mate was something he had gradually learnt over the course of their time together to be natural and normal, rather than a sign of weakness that would earn her disapproval. If anything, the ability to share moments with her like this made them stronger; not weaker.

"C'mon then, let's get this paste applied 'cos it does sting like mad, I'm not even gonna lie. The fuckin' alpha took a right good bite outta me, huh? I can't lie about that either; she's a damn good fighter but-- well, obviously I came out on top. I always do," he smirked smugly as he tilted his body to the side, inhaling quietly to brace himself for the coldness of the paste. He even bit the inside of his cheek in that preparation, not wanting to squirm about or whine pathetically. He wanted to ride the wave of being the tough, strong alpha returning from battle to continue impressing his mate... all of which would probably be undercut severely if he started whining like a baby at the paste being too cold for him to handle.

"...Everyone'll be glad to see 'ya, anyway. Even the twins missed 'ya - an' I'm sure they'll tease 'ya like mad when they work out what we got up to, but that comes with the territory. It's to be expected, ain't it? That's just the shit they do - god help the women that they end up with."
 
After gently pulling him down to sit on the edge of the bed, Clarissa moved to kneel on the bed behind him to apply the paste. However she didn't immediately apply it, instead nuzzling her lips into the side of his neck and attempting to distract him with kisses and affection. A few minutes into that did she apply the paste, hoping that it had also warmed up slightly on her fingers and in her palm. She tenderly and carefully spread the mixture over the bite, brow slowly furrowing as she witnessed the brutality of the injury.

"She really got you good..." She murmured, unable to help the bubble of concern she had for her mate. Although she knew he was alright and that the wound wasn't life threatening, she knew it would still cause some ache or pain. However she supposed their positions were reversed only a few days ago, when she was attacked and he had to take care of her. "So the alpha you brought back, is it the female that did this to you?"

Considering the events of the night before, they didn't exactly allow themselves the opportunity to simply sit and talk about the events of the day. The desire to fulfil the call of their nature was too great and potent to ignore, and it seemed like nothing else mattered. Not that Clarissa was complaining. It put an end to her heat but also allowed her to indulge in the relief of having her mate back in her arms safe and - relatively - well.

"How many of theirs did ya bring back? Now that I think about it, there's too strong a scent out there for it just to be their one alpha. Did you return the favour or somethin' by kidnappin' some of their pack members too?" She raised an eyebrow, lips pressing against the top his shoulder as she lowered the tin of paste. She picked up the bandages to begin wrapping them around him, keeping her touch light and gentle, "What exactly do you plan to do with all of 'em now? We've got our pack members back, what else've we got to do?"

Finishing up on his bandage by tying the two ends together and tucking them under some of the rolls, Clarissa moved to sit at his side, facing him. Her eyes wandered over him briefly, checking for any further injuries he may have kept hidden from her - she wouldn't put it past him.

"Is... Is Anders... okay? I mean, I feel awful I didn't go out to see him straight after. All that time without him and how we left things? But I just-- the heat wouldn't let me focus on anything else. But is he-- he wasn't... hurt, was he? He was alrigh'? Was he okay with you? Is he still... he ain't still mad, is he?"
 
The coldness did cause the alpha to flinch a little as it was applied, though the soothing, numbing sensation that followed calmed him immediately. The stinging remained but he knew it wouldn't take too long for the paste to do its job and numb the area - and his body's enhanced ability to heal itself would get to work in helping him recover from it.

He withheld a breath as the bandages were applied, breathing out slowly to avoid letting the pain register on his expression. Regardless of the paste, the area was still sore - another wolf, an alpha at that, had taken a bite out of him so it was guaranteed to sting a bit until it began to heal over. He did his best not to wince too much as he helpfully adjusted his body's position to allow his mate to tie the bandages around him, smiling gratefully at the help.

"Yeah, got the alpha tied up alongside some of the others we took - they were mostly injured so we couldn't just leave 'em. They're fuckin' enemies to us, but I wasn't gonna leave 'em suffering. Besides, more we got here where we can keep an eye on 'em, the better. Mind you, I got no clue what we're going with 'em. I... I'll figure it out but for now, leaving 'em tied up and made to feel as uncomfortable as the members they kidnapped from us seems like the best option."

With a faint shrug, he leaned across to offer his mate a peck on the cheek in gratitude for the help before easing himself off the bed in search for a shirt. His muscles ached in general from the battle with the other pack (though the aching wasn't entirely helped by the night with Clarissa in addition) so he had to move carefully to avoid exacerbating the pain, gently placing his t-shirt on with just a faint groan in discomfort.

"Huh-- Oh god, don't worry about Anders; it's fine. Kid's eager to see 'ya, wouldn't shut up about it. He wants to apologise to 'ya after the whole incident that went down so-- nah, he's not mad, far from it. He's got a few cuts and bruises but I reckon it ain't too bad; makes him look tough, y'know? And that'll go down well with the girls 'round here. If Anders needs anything, it's a fuckin' girlfriend. Not sure where he'll find the time to enjoy a girl's company when he's lookin' after that baby but whatever," he grunted as he ran his hand through his hair, pausing when he realised that he hadn't exactly had the time to discuss much of last night's events when he had been too occupied in being with Clarissa, prioritising their needs over more general discussions.

"We found this baby at the other pack, parents weren't there. Anders is looking after it which is-- I ain't happy about it, put it that way. He ain't got a mate an' he's too young to worry about a fuckin' baby. I want Gio and Sasha looking after it; they want kids, it'd be good practise for 'em until someone comes by looking for the kid. But I dunno, I don't fancy pissing Anders off when he just got back here-- you could have a chat with him, right? He'd listen to 'ya, Clar, you know he will. And I'd appreciate it - I ain't having my youngest brother wasting the time he could be spending havin' fun, with girls or whatever. It ain't fair on 'im to take on a responsibility he don't need to take on, so-- if you have a word with him for me, I'd be real fuckin' grateful, darlin'."
 
"The poor kid has been back for barely a day and you're already wantin' him to get a girlfriend? Lay off, Tate. Let him just enjoy bein' back with his family for a bit." She rolled her eyes but there was a faint grin on her lips in amusement. She pushed herself from the bed, following after him to search the chest of drawers for a shirt and bottoms of her own. As she slid the drawer shut, she sharply looked up, "Wait, baby? What-- what baby--"

She cut off as he began to explain, standing there holding the clothes to her chest for a moment. Fuck, she really had missed a lot from yesterday's events. Moving to the table, which was now only accompanied by one chair since she broke the other during her heat (out of pure frustration), she laid the shirt and trousers down on the surface. A soft snort escaped her at his request, eyebrow raising as she pulled the shirt over her head. Her own muscles groaned in protest, obviously still sore from their exploits during the night, and once the shirt was on, Clarissa tentatively pressed fingers to the bandage on the back of her neck.

"If you think I'm goin' be havin' a word with Anders about gettin' him to stop doin' somethin' he's clearly enjoyin'... you're havin' a laugh, Tate." She then drawled, lowering her hand from her neck to begin pulling on her trousers, "The kid's just come back from a kinda hell we don't even know about, been without his family for two weeks, havin' left us on a bad note... do you really think I'm goin' tell him what he can and can't fuckin' do?" She shook her head, smirking, "Not a chance. Maybe he don't think it's a waste of time, have you even talked to him about it?"

Clarissa waited for the response and then raised an eyebrow, "I'll talk to him, but not in the way you're wantin' me to. If he's happy lookin' after that baby, if it's somethin' he wants to do, I ain't goin' to be the one tellin' him to pack it in." She walked up to her mate and reached up to pull his head down to her, pressing a kiss to his forehead, "It'll sort itself out, just... stop tryin' to control everythin', for once. He's a big boy, he can make his own, personal, decisions."
 
At the rejection, Tate smiled but felt anything but contentment with her decision. He wasn't going to pester her about it when she had made her point crystal clear -and he knew better than to protest against it- but he was far from happy with it, namely because he felt like his brother was ruining the time in his life where things should be relaxed and easy. It was, ultimately, a reflection on how he felt about children anyway; how they would take up his time and prevent him prioritising his work as alpha which had dominated his life for so long.

He didn't want children because he didn't want anything disrupting the life he had built for himself; a life he had worked incredibly hard to achieve. Now he was at a point where everything had fallen into place for him and he had achieved everything he could have possibly wanted from life, including a mate who he loved deeply with all his heart. Having children would only disrupt that and he wasn't prepared to have his life be turned upside-down with the unpredictability children represented to him.

So his opinion of Anders' situation was possibly skewed as a result of his personal opinion. Anders (he thought) had no mate and was young; this was a time in his life where he should be relaxing, taking things slow and just enjoying himself, not restricting himself by undertaking a responsibility he wasn't expected nor forced to do.

Expecting him to adhere to his mindset was controlling and he recognised that... even though he was also an older brother who just wanted Anders to have somewhat of a carefree life before responsibilities properly kicked in.

"...I just... I ain't trying t' control him, but he's not-- he ain't smart. If I'm gonna be blunt, the kid's naive as hell and he needs guidance; that's a fact. He's latched onto caring for the kid an' that's fine an' all that, but I just don't think he's thinking about the-- the future, what it means to be a guardian. I'm just looking out for 'im, I ain't doing anything else," he attempted in defence of himself, breathing out quietly as he continued to get dressed. He already knew that he would be met with knowing smirks and glances when he stepped out of the hut to the pack, which was enough to try and fight against.

Possibly hurting Anders and dealing with those consequences as well wasn't something he wanted to do, at least not right now.

"I'm fuckin' starving, so let's go an' have breakfast and... I'll sort everythin' out later. I just want some honey and porridge and get everything sorted out around here, get back to some normality that's been missin' for weeks. You ready to head on down to the fire? 'Cos we'll be the centre of attention and... I just wanna make sure you're braced for that. I'm imagining that everyone will delight in fucking teasing us, so... just be ready for that, babe."
 
"So you think he ain't smart because he's steppin' up to look after a baby which you allowed to be brought back to camp? You think he ain't smart cause he's takin' on that responsibility rather than goin' round and havin' fun with a bunch of girls, maybe shaggin' a few of them?" Clarissa slowly folded her arms, eyebrow quirked. "That don't sound like naivety to me, Tate. Instead it just sounds like a bunch of bullshit comin' out of your mouth."

Clarissa was prepared to be harsh on her mate, despite the wonderful and loving night they had just shared. She still hadn't forgotten about what he had said regarding children, about potentially never wanting them. Her emotions were displayed toward that comment had been easily shown through the fact that there was now one less chair in the hut. So she couldn't help but wonder if his thoughts about the baby getting in the way was a reflection of how he felt about children. If he thought that a baby of their own would hinder them in some way.

"He's just been through a scary situation, where he weren't to be sure if we'd find him again. Don't you think that he's thought plenty about the future by now? I know if I were in his shoes I wouldn't have been able to stop thinkin' about the future I might miss out on." She didn't dare admit that she had actually been wondering about that herself. His behaviour now and his words from the other day had her wondering if she would miss the chance to be a mother. She would never force fatherhood upon her mate, but it did hurt, that maternal instinct slightly stronger now after the heat.

Rolling her eyes next, she finished the buttons on her shirt and then slipped her feet into her shoes. "You really need to stop worrying about what people are goin' say or do after every little thin' we do. We fucked, Tate, yes. We gave into the heat, yes. But so does everyone. You're the alpha, you're goin' be in the spotlight, but you're just like them."

She stepped toward the door, realising that her behaviour may have become more irate as the conversation went on, but she wasn't prepared to apologise for it. She was irritated, and she felt like she had a right to be, even if he didn't know the reason behind it.

"So get over it, and let's go. I'm not goin' give a fuck what they think, and neither should you."
 
The sharpness to her words caught the alpha by surprise, evidently note prepared to have provoked that irateness from his mate - though he wanted to believe that perhaps she hadn't meant it. Sometimes things were said in a way they weren't intended to, indicating emotions that weren't actually present within them. He might have been inclined to believe that that was the case if not for her body language, the roll of her eyes unsubtle. That couldn't be misinterpreted, especially not when stacked up against the sharp tone her words had taken on.

Altogether, he knew that he had upset her, indirectly or otherwise, and so racked his brain to try and stumble upon the reason for that. He couldn't continue with the morning as normal with the realisation that his mate was annoyed lingering over him, clouding what really should be one of the more enjoyable moments with his pack. He had every reason to join them for breakfast with a smile, enjoy the banter that he had missed out on last night.

And he wasn't prepared to fake it - which he would have to do if he left the hut with the question of whether he had said or done something to irk Carina circling above him.

It didn't take him long to suspect what the cause of her downturn in behaviour towards him was, a frown crossing his face in mild annoyance of his own. This wasn't a conversation he wanted to have anytime soon, let alone now of all times when they ought to be enjoying the celebratory mood carried on from last night, but apparently his words had brought up a subject in Clarissa's mind that threatened to set a cast over the morning - and he wasn't willing to let that happen.

He calmly shut the door and leaned back against it as he thought his words through carefully - though there really wasn't too many ways he could soften the blow of admitting that he really didn't want children.

"...I don't want to have a conversation about this now, but-- I don't think I want kids. Okay? I'm saying it as bluntly as possible to avoid anything bein' misconstrued in the future. I ain't father material. I don't think it's responsible of us to bring a kid into the world; a kid that'll grow up hatin' me when I don't give it the attention it deserves. I just don't like kids that much; it ain't for me. An' I love 'ya, I do, but I ain't gonna put a kid through emotional shit when I can't prioritise 'em and give 'em attention; that's just selfish, yeah? So as much as I love 'ya Clar, I can't-- I won't have kids. It's better we don't have 'em than have one or two and have them be emotionally affected by my inevitably shit parentin'."

With a faint smile, he moved to nudge open the door again and nodded in motion for her to head out before him, doing his best to keep the mood light despite the heaviness of his remarks.

"But-- hey, we'd be a great uncle and auntie. Gio's been wantin' a kid so... we can take part in uncle and auntie duties. Just.. can we just put all this behind us now an' enjoy breakfast? 'Cos I wanna try and make the most of the celebratory mood, y'know?"
 
Her eyes averted from his as he closed the door and leaned against it to face her, arms folding as she took a step back from him in order to place some more space between them.

"You can't-- you can't say you don't want to have a conversation about it an' then fuckin' say that to me, Tate." Clarissa answered quietly, taking another small step back from the door, "You're not... you're not even goin' ask me how I feel about all this. About what I want? You're just... you're just goin' make this fuckin' decision for the both of us? Did you ever stop an' think that the decision might have been taken out of your hands already? I could already be fuckin' pregnant, Tate, because of everythin' we did last night which you seemed to be enjoyin'. An' what about after? There ain't anythin' stoppin' me from gettin' pregnant by accident, both in and out of heat."

A coldness had settled within her veins, and a heaviness had come to sit on her chest. Of course it was too soon, and they had too much shit going on in that moment for sure to even consider having a kid. But she always imagined she would have one some day. So to hear these words coming out of her mate's mouth, it hurt.

It hurt just as much to hear him doubt himself as a father. She had no idea how he had come to this conclusion, or why he believed his words would be true. If he was half as loving toward the child as he was to her, then he would be a fantastic father. She couldn't understand his reasoning.

"I don't want to be just an auntie, Tate. I actually do want children. I want to be a mother. Maybe not now, maybe not in two years. But eventually. Eventually Tate I want kids."

She stared at him, arms still folded across her chest as the tension grew tighter in her shoulders. She was unsure as to if she could actually go out there now and pretend to be okay. It would be hard to smile and laugh and deal with the teasing after what she had come to learn for certain.

Licking her lower lip, she finally tore her eyes away from him and rolled her shoulders back, "You go on to breakfast. I'm goin' go bath, I'm... I'm all sweaty from the Heat and I want'ta clean up properly before I see them all again." She mumbled, finally moving toward the door to head out as he motioned for them to do so.
 
"...There's this natural flower in the forest that I remember my mother picking and chewing in the mornings; it'll prevent pregnancy. I mean, she had six kids - after Daisy, I guess she figured six was enough. I remember wonderin' why she was eating a fuckin' flower with her breakfast but that's what it was for, so-- it ain't like we gotta risk it. There's that option out there which-- I can have Daisy pick some for 'ya. I just-- I ain't having a kid, Clar. It ain't somethin' I want."

He shrugged in an effort to keep casual despite the heaviness of the topic; a move he knew would appear flippant and unbothered but it was more of a defence mechanism to push back the rising emotions he hardly wanted to reach the surface. He would gladly do anything for Clarissa, that being part of what a mate was supposed to do, but there were apparently some things that he couldn't do for her, and allowing them to bring a child into the world just happened to be one of them.

"I get that you think I'm being fuckin' selfish by imposing this on 'ya but that's-- this is the responsible thing. Do you want a child of ours growing up fuckin' hating me 'cos I wasn't there for 'em? 'Cos I don't. I don't like children, I don't... get the appeal of having one, I dunno. It's not me, Clar. I'm not gonna go giving you a kid 'cos you want one when that's just... it's... you can't fuckin' subject an innocent child to a childhood where their father ain't able to look out for 'em. Because I won't be doing that, it's not... me. I work hard, I have alpha duties, and... the spare time I do have I like spending with you. Just you. I ain't having some child growing up resenting me, or vice versa. Don't you get how selfish it'd be for us to put a kid through that just 'cos you wanted one?"

He exhaled sharply after the rant, inwardly groaning at how some of his words had come out but being blunt was the only way to make his point clear without the message being somehow twisted or accidentally altered. He wanted to be reassuring and try and remind her that not having children wasn't the end of the world, that there was a lot they could enjoy without kids around, but he figured now wasn't the time when she was undeniably disappointed and even hurt by the revelations.

Instead, he forced a smile and opened the door again, taking a glance down at his pack and finding his smile widening. At least their morning had gone without any hitches, unlike his own which was becoming more sour by the second.

"...We're alright, ain't we? This-- ain't a conversation I wanted with 'ya just yet but... I'm not gonna suddenly change my mind in a year or two, Clar. I can't... I won't ever want kids, so... maybe... you know, after last night, during the heat-- maybe you can give those flowers a try? I'm sure there's someone in the pack who knows where to find 'em growing."
 
"You don't even know that will happen!" She blurted, finally losing her composure at the shrug which had been, as he though, misconstrued as uncaring and unbothered. "You don't know what that kid'll feel or what they'll think! You don't know if they'll hate you for putting your duties first or if they'll be proud of havin' an alpha for a dad. Now I don't know if this is all comin' from your own experiences with your dad, cause we've had a shit time lately and not even had a chance to even get to know each other in that sense, but you're fuckin' kiddin' yourself if you think any kid of ours would end up resentin' either one of us."

She turned to face him in the doorway, having been so close to just ignoring all his words and continuing on to the lake to bathe as she said. But she couldn't. How could she ignore everything he had just said? Calling her selfish for wanting a kid? How was him not wanting one, not selfish either? He was forcing this decision onto her, without even having heard what she wanted.

"You might have your alpha duties, Tate, but what'll I have? I've not been raised like you have to know where I belong. I don't fit in here completely and-- and back at the village... being a mother was something I knew I'd do well." Her mind wandered to the little kids she looked after from time to time, the ones she helped make feel comfortable when she was taking them for a fitting or fixing their clothes. How easy it was to get a giggle or smile from them. "Just 'cause you think a kid will resent you doesn't mean they would resent me. I can't just be sittin' around here waitin' for you to finish with your duties for the day like some good little housewife-- mate."

Clarissa then halted, lips parted to continue but they slowly closed as her eyes searched his.

"There's no point in... in even talkin' to you about this. You're a stubborn fuck..." She huffed quietly, taking a step back with a shake of her head. "I can't-- I need to go bathe, cool off. I can't-- can't be here right now." She swallowed thickly and turned to go down the steps of the hut.

Hesitating again, she turned back to face him, cheeks rosy from the emotion she was holding back, "And if you'd listened to anything Sasha said three days ago - you'd remember that those flowers wouldn't fuckin' work durin' the heat. So in six months time, you'd better stay the fuck away from me lest we end up with somethin' you'll clearly fuckin' regret."

With that final comment, Clarissa stalked off, tugging miserably at her shirt as she retreated into the treeline to take a dip in the lake.
 
There wasn't anything Clarissa could say or do that would change his stance, the idea of being a father having always made him grimace. He had never desired that future for himself and even though he now had a mate (which he thought would be improbable for him just a few months back) he still didn't want the little family dynamic that most mates ended up creating together. It just wasn't him and while it might be selfish, he wasn't willing to effectively alter his life irreparably just to make Clarissa happy.

They didn't need children to be happy, whereas having a child just to satisfy her would, in turn, affect the life he wanted to lead. He didn't want the added duty of being a father when it didn't appeal to him and, more than that, would only distract him from the priorities he held as the alpha. Clarissa could be visibly upset with him as she currently was, accusing him of being ridiculous, stubborn and selfish, but in his head, he was doing the right thing by not wanting to bring a kid into the world when it wouldn't have the happy family dynamic over children in the pack would have.

He might not want children but he wasn't heartless, the idea of any child of his comparing him to the loving fathers other children in the pack had being something that ought to be avoided - it wasn't a fair position to place any child in. While Clarissa had a point in remarking that neither of them knew that would be the case, Tate held back the biting response, in which he could be almost completely certain that he wouldn't want to be a hands-on, loving father; not when it would just make him uncomfortable and get in the way of the duties as alpha of the pack he would always prioritise over anything else.

Instead of continuing the conversation when it was already teetering into argument territory, he bit his tongue and let the other leave to cool off without attempting to stop her. It was what they needed, even if he desperately wanted to make amends with her - having any bitterness with his mate was painful, particularly after the night they had shared. He wanted to keep that good feeling going, not see it demolished before breakfast had even commenced.

Rather than head down there with her like the pack inevitably expected, he reached breakfast alone and settled beside the fire without glancing at anyone, or saying a word. He didn't want to be false and pretend to be alright, so keeping to himself and stoking the fire with a stick to keep himself busy was the best way to avoid talking to the members of the pack who obviously got the impression that something had happened back in the hut to cause such tension in Tate.

Anders, having watched Clarissa head off first and now witnessing his brother's tense body language, frowned to himself in confusion. It was no secret to anyone in the pack that Clarissa and Tate had spent the night together, giving into the demands of her heat, so how they could go from that to an argument was lost on the youngest brother, who racked his brain to try and work out what had happened, though ultimately gave up when he realised it could be anything.

Assuming his eldest brother was too caught up in his thoughts to notice anything, Tate's sudden glare up at him when he moved to take some bowls of porridge across to the kidnapped pack members made him flinch.

"We ain't feedin' 'em, they can wait until fuckin' dinner tonight. They aren't having breakfast, so sit the fuck down Anders."

"...You can't just... not feed them, they're still people, Tate, I... I don't think it's... right to let 'em go hungry," mumbled Anders in response, unable to stop himself from peering across at the tied-up werewolves, specifically at Ronan. He knew missing one or two meals wasn't going to devastate any of those that had been captured, but he didn't like the idea of enjoying his breakfast when his mate was sat, tied up, and forced to go hungry. Though challenging Tate at the moment was a recipe for disaster so, wisely, he backed down and returned to his seat, choosing to focus on carefully feeding the baby bundled in blankets and tucked up carefully in his arms.