"I've been a dreamer ever since I was a child, or so my parents have told me. I could never keep my feet on the ground, and I always had my head in the clouds. I've never been the type to have a one track mind, and I tend to always take the scenic route to my ultimate destination. I guess I just don't want to be held down or confined by anything, you know? I want to discover and learn as much as I can, no matter how insignificant the subject may seem to someone else. We live in this world full of unique individuals, and we as humans hold so much potential. I, personally, never want to be one who simply "blends in" with the crowd. I don't want to follow in other people's footsteps—I want to pave my own way.
And that, my friends, is precisely what I intend to do.
You see, I've always been a pretty headstrong individual. I won't lie; I can be bullheaded at times. Still, I think this is one of the few aspects that kept me going through the tougher times of my life. The roads aren't always paved nice and smooth—they're rough, cracked, and ragged even—but my immense motivation and determination has always kept me going. One thing's for certain, it sure came in handy when my parents divorced. I was only five years old, and neither of them were willing to give up custody of me. The court battles felt like a true war, that of which ended with my mother gaining 75% custody and my father granted a mere 25%. The conclusion was justified, for their occupations and the circumstances behind them did differ vastly.
This resulted in me flying back and forth between America, where my mother was stationed for her work in business, and Italy, where my father worked as an artist. He traveled frequently between Rome, Venice, and Florence, and visiting him was always an adventure. A part of me believes that I take after my father much more than my mother, for I'm far more artistic and free-spirited, rather than all work and no play. I couldn't change the court's decision, for I was just a child back then; I had no say in the matter. Therefore, I decided to enjoy the time I got with my father to its full potential. I mainly visited him during the holidays and during the summer when I didn't have school, and every day was something new—a journey I never got sick of taking.
However, like a long lost dream, those days soon faded away.
My father grew ill around the time I turned thirteen. Little did my mother and I know, he developed cancer. Since he didn't have any medical insurance nor enough money to even begin to pay for treatment, he put off going to the hospital for quite a while. I noticed that he seemed to be growing thinner and thinner each time I came to visit him. Perhaps it was because our time apart was so vast, but I almost didn't recognize him when I arrived every time. Before we knew it, we got the call in notice of his passing. My mother was far more torn than I thought she'd be, for she was the one who filed for divorce to begin with. Perhaps it was regret or guilt on her part, but we both were in mourning for a very, very long time. In fact, in some ways.. I think we still are.
Life goes on mercilessly, though.
Like the waves washing up on the shore, we always have to come back again. The day the ocean stands still is the day the world would probably end, and nobody's quite ready for that yet. You ask me to describe an image that defines who I wish to be in society, yes? Well, I can tell you one thing—it's not your basic broad sitting behind a desk in some office. I want to see the world and learn as much as I can about every aspect of it. I want to capture precious sights with my camera lenses, sing and play songs from foreign and familiar lands, dance for as long as my body will allow, and sculpt my image of the world with my very hands—just as my father did. Regardless of what my mundane mother has to say, I want to shine in a different light.
So what if I dye my hair rainbow colors one day? So what if my clothes are eccentric in style or covered in clay? Personally, I don't care what society has to think. I want to run as far as my feet will take me. I want to accept all the world has to offer with open arms—both good and bad—and I'll face it all with a smile.
I want to do everything my dad should have had more time to do.. and then even more." ♥