Under The Influence

"Maybe because I want to make something of myself!" she cried loudly, suddenly frustrated and feeling defeated.
She was angry and upset as she stood before Kestreel, clenching her fists at her sides and wondering how much it would hurt if she hit him. She imagined that it would bring her more pain than him.
Still, the young woman was upset. Kestreel thought that he could go out there and risk his life, leaving her for days on end without any word if he was alive, and she couldn't even do something for her own self esteem and dignity? Maybe it wasn't the best way to go about making something of herself, but Kate still had the memory of yesterday in her head.

Her blood was practically boiling and she practically stared Kestreel down, "you don't think I've gone through shit in my life? I'm sorry that I'm not your twin - I didn't go to war, didn't bomb buildings, I've never even hurt someone until yesterday! But don't write me off like some still little girl that no nothing about the way the world works. You think you're all Mr. High And Mighty, 'I can control everything and everyone because I'm bigger and stronger and better'. But in reality, you're just a big coward! You won't take a risk because you don't want to lose something that's close to you. Yet you go and do the exact same thing to me, every day you walk out of this apartment!"
 
"You know nothing." Replied Kestreel calmly, turning her own rage against her. "We are not talking about you or about me here, we are talking about going to a place not even me would go if it wasn't because of this job. And you are so naive to think that you will be able to walk in there, like nothing. Because you are a young girl you think they will let you in like that? That they will help you?" Asked Kestreel. "Think about it, damn it. It's a city governed by a warlord. At the first sight of you, they will take you to a back alley, rape you and leave you naked on the ground for the next 'customer' to use you, again and again until you die." Explained him.

"I've seen it before. I've seen it Africa, I've seen it in Vorkuta, I've seen it many times all around the world. Don't expect to be treated like here, in the big city. In there nobody is worth anything." If her plan was to go there and play the needy American girl, they were not going anywhere.
 
"You think I've never been there before?!" Kate yelled, her cheeks growing red with anger and rage. She was sure that she had never been so annoying and angry with another person before. Kestreel was infuriating her though. "I am not some innocent little American girl that hasn't seen the world, Kestreel! I can take care of myself if need be. It's not being to be as though I throw myself at them! All I need to do is get in there, get you in there, and then we can get out! Whether you realize it or not, Kestreel, that's your only option."

Kate took a few deep breathes, trying to calm herself down. She didn't want to fight with him but he didn't realize what he was losing if he was turning her down - she knew darn well he was not going to get in there without her, and if that were the case, he was never going to get out of this life. Forever he'd be be in and out, and Kate wasn't sure she'd be able to tolerate that until the lifestyle took him, once and for all.

The young woman sat back down in the chair and felt the tears of sadness and anger at the back of her eyes. She looked away, not wanting Kestreel to see that she was weak; there was no way she wanted to back down from this fight. "You need to do this! You think that I am going to stay around for another ten or twenty years, if you even last like that, waiting for you to come home from your 'jobs'? And then when your dead, then what do I do? Move onto the next idiot that takes me in? It doesn't work like that, Kestreel! You have to end this, and this might be the only way to get the money you need and the respect you deserve."
 
Kestreel shook his head again. "So get in and get out... Do you even hear yourself?" Asked him. "I realize this may be the only option for me to get out of this vicious circle. But is not as easy as 'Get in and get out.' How do you even plan to get yourself in without being killed? Eh? And what about me? What is your marvelous plan to get me inside? You speak like you got it all under control, so go ahead, tell me: How do we get in?" Said him, more than trying to be annoying, trying to make her realize it was not that simple.

"Details, Kate. In this job is all about the details. You can't just say; hey, I will go in there, find that guy and get out. You need the how, the when. Think about it and you will realize your plan is as good as not having a plan in the first place." Explained Kestreel patiently. Way more patiently than he had been anytime before.
 
"It's a fucking idea!" she screamed, the windows vibrating slightly with her loud voice. Kate had never really yelled at Kestreel but he was surely good at pushing her buttons. She was angry and annoyed, and she really wanted to smack him across the face right now. "I'm sorry that I just came up with the idea and don't have all the details worked out! I'm sorry I wasn't in the military, hadn't done this for 10 years! It was a fucking idea, Kestreel, and you know damn well it's the only way that you can get into there."

Kate knew she could do it. She knew it wouldn't be easy and that it wasn't going to be just "get in and get out", but it was worth a try, right? If it meant getting Kestreel out of this life, Kate would gladly do it.

She stood from the couch and with her hands clasped tightly at her sides, she slowly explained, "fuck you, Kestreel. Maybe it's about try you get off your high horse and realize that sometimes you might need help doing your job. If you want to go over there and risk your life getting that man, don't expect me to be on the other line when you call, or even in this apartment when you come home on a failed attempt." And with that the young woman went into the bedroom, slamming the door roughly behind her and flopping into the bed. She had half a mind to grab her things and leave, but she didn't want to be too dramatic...
 
There was something Kate didn't knew about him... Well, many things, but between one of those was that Kestreel did had a plan for himself. He had been thinking about it since he had left the Italian restaurant. It was simple and for one person it worked. In fact he had a few nice ideas actually; parachuting himself into the city during the night, use the sewers or ram a bus packed with people into the city and sneak out of the bus before anyone could notice. Good ideas there were a ton, but the thing was if he actually wanted to be without Kate for that long.

Sighing, he sat on the sofa again, thinking about those very important details about his plans. Even if it was just for fun, because at this rate, he was not going anywhere fast.
 
Kate barricaded herself in the bedroom for the rest of the evening, hoping that Kestreel would soon knock on the door and come to the realization that she was right - that the only way he could get into that city was with her help. But the knock never came, and as the hours ticked by, Kate came to the realization that Kestreel was never going to see the situation the way she saw it. Instead he was just going to travel to China for God only knows how long, risk his life and hope that she would still be here when he got back... if he ever did.
But Kate was sick and tired and really wished that her big Russian would get off that high horse of his. She didn't mind him calling the shots but when it came to a situation such as this time, she thought she would at least have some say. Fuck, they were just about to have a baby - she imagined he would have probably gone even if she had seen been pregnant.

Slowly but surely Kate began to throw her things - which constituted of mainly just some clothing and toiletries - into her duffel bag. She knew that Kestreel was not going to be happy about this but she was done with this shit. She was sick and tired, and just plain exhausted by his games.

Finally Kate emerged from the bedroom and found Kestreel right where she had left him. His expression was indifferent and he only rose his gaze to her when she cleared her throat. She had her bag clutched in between her hands and her expression was pained. "Until you realize that I'm the only way that you can get into there, I'm not putting up with your shit. Go ahead and go to China for a few years, see how much I care. All I know is that I'm not going to be anywhere around here when you get back."
 
If that was what it took to make her realize... whatever she had to realize, then so be it. But now, knowing Kate was leaving, Kestreel knew the only way to suppress the pain that he knew it would eventually come was to accept that job and to focus in it until it was done. She said she won't be around for when he was done, if he had ever come back. Sad, but that was one more thing he was going to bear in order to know she was safe, because thy both knew the worsts pains she had been trough were because of him.

He got up and sat in front of his laptop. There were many things to plan now, all by himself. But that only made things easier.
 
He didn't fight for her. Didn't ask for her to stay, didn't plead with her to stick around until he figured out what to do. It was almost like Kate didn't mean a thing to him - and then again, maybe she didn't. What kind of man allowed the woman he loved to walk out just like that? Not even a word had left his lips as she walked to the door and let herself out. She even left the cell phone he had given her on the nightstand, and thus they would have no contact. But once more, Kestreel didn't seem to care. Maybe he never did.

Kate made her way to a small motel with the little money that she had saved up for a rainy day. She unpacked her things and for a long while, just stared at the black television screen. She felt empty inside, alone for the first time in a long time. Kate doubted that Kestreel would ever come back for her... that he would fight for their love and her presence in his life. It was as though the entire relationship had been a sham; he hadn't truly loved her, didn't need her around as she needed him.

He hadn't fought for her. The thought brought Kate more pain than she cared to experience and after awhile, she curled up into a ball on the bed and sobbed herself into sleep.
 
Getting to chine was easy, getting into that city, not so much. But it wasn't as impossible as he may have thought in the first place. In the end, it took one of the most ancient ways to sneak in; Kill some random guard and use his clothes to get in. Yeah, that simple. Guess Chinese people isn't as smart as the rest of the world thinks. Getting to t his objective? Totally different issue. First; the city was a freaking labyrinth, the streets were as narrow as half hallways, the whole city was always moist and wet because of the height of it and the inability of the sun to reach the lower levels. The thing got worse when it rained, that for Kestreel dismay was almost twice a week.

For entire months, Kestreel wandered that city, knowing his target was in there, but still unable to pinpoint where. And the constant memory of Kate didn't helped at all neither. That little girl did got into his bones, and not even the many hookers he had sex with helped him forget about her. If her last words were true, he was not going to see her again, and even if he tried, she would probably don't want to see him, so after almost a year, he began to forget her.

And it was almost a year, because the whole joke took Kestreel five years to achieve, and in the end, he got that bastard the most stupid way possible. While he got in one of his abusive trips to rape some under aged daughter of one of his citizens, Kestreel slit his throat while he got sucked in a back alley. Five years. Five years to find him almost by coincidence. Eager to get out of that place, Kestreel did as promised, cut that bastard head off and when he got the chance, walked out of there. Walking out was easier than walking in, the guards spent a whole day all altered because their boss was nowhere to be found.

The next month, Kestreel spent it getting his reward, fixing papers and getting new identities. Kestreel couldn't be millionaire, but Kolyat could. Kolyat, what a weird name to get, but one that sure no one would look for.

Then one day, he decided to pay a visit to his old friends, Daniel, to be more accurate. That guy sure was homosexual, but that bastard knew where to put the money when we talked about ridiculous amounts of it. Dressed like a true rich man, but still serious and dull, Kestreel walked into the hotel, Practically unrecognizable, and after making his way to Daniel's room, he knocked at the door.
 
For the first year and a half, Kate had whored herself to get by. She had been expecting Kestreel to return for her for the first couple of months, but once he never gain, Kate assumed that he had left and gone. And so the young woman made a living with the only thing she knew how to use properly - her body. She stood on the corner of a local downtown street most nights, hopping into the car of any man they would open his door to her. Somedays she'd make a meager twenty dollar bill, and once, a man paid her several thousand for an entire weekend. And so Kate allowed her body to be used and abused, and eventually, she learned to seperate herself from the life that she was living. This was what she was doomed to do for the rest of her life; Kestreel was gone, she no protector. Kate was on her own.

It wasn't until she was standing on the street on a cool fall day, two years after Kestreel left, that a sleek black car pulled up to the curb. Kate had smiled, figuring she'd be paid a handsome amount as this person looked loaded. As soon as she slid into the passenger seat, though, her eyes widened.
Daniel had discovered her prostitution tendencies that night, and offered to give her a place to stay in his hotel. And again the young woman was taken care of. She went through a few boyfriends after that, older men that naturally seemed after her body more than her heart. So after awhile Kate simply gave into the truth - that she was to be alone for the rest of her life.
Luckily, she never reverted to the drugs, not wanting to ruin how far she had come. Daniel was a great help as well, offering her a job as a chamber maid so she could get back onto her feet.
Still, little Kate always felt a certain emptiness. She tried not to think of Kestreel, but when she find an odd token of him or crossed paths with a wide-shouldered Russian man, her stomach would clench.

Kate sighed softly and flopped back into the couch of Daniel's apartment. He was still living in the same grand suite, and often nights Kate would come up to join him for a dip in the pool and some drinks. He had been through a variety of boyfriends himself, but now seemed to have his eyes set on one of the valets downstairs. Kate smiled to herself - the man had never changed, even after a half decade.

"Dan, honey, no more food," Kate laughed, "I swear you are trying to fatten me up."
Daniel giggled and pinched her shoulder playfully, "you could always use some more meat on your bones."

There was a faint knock at the door then, and Daniel's brow furrowed. Friday was their "girls night" and didn't revolve any visitors.
But Daniel approached the door anyways, and Kate laid back against the couch, figuring it was just a maid or perhaps room service with some treats he had ordered. But when the young woman heard that voice - deep with a thick Russian accent and slightly poor English - her heart clenched.

"Kestreel, BABBBBY!" Daniel giggled a few feet away, "I thought for sure you were deeeeeead!"
 
Kestreel, or Kolyat now, chuckled. Yeah, that man showed emotions now. Very few, as always, but five years living in the very incarnation of hell on Earth and after that, a stupid amount numbers in a Swiss bank account changed anyone. "Russian meat can't be killed. Didn't you knew that?" Said Kestreel with a smile. "It's good to see you, friend." Said him patting Daniel in the shoulder. For Kestreel life couldn't be better right now. Sure he had to go through immeasurable pain and suffering to get here, but it was worth it? Only time could tell. "Anyway. I was here to talk to you about money." Said Kestreel auto inviting himself into the room.
 
"Money?" Daniel squealed, bounding into the room after him, "I LOOOOOVE money!"

Kate was not sitting up straight on the couch, feeling impossibly awkward and uncomfortable with the situation. She doubted that Kestreel wanted to see her - after all, he had left her here in America while going on a dangerous mission - how much could he really care about her? The young woman wiggled her toes in the plush carpet as she waited for the two men to enter the grand room. Part of her wanted to dart in the bathroom and hide in there, but before he could move, an impossibly tall Kestreel entered with his small, very gay companion. He was just as handsome as Kate remembered, though the days in China had surely aged him a bit more. Kate looked down at her lap, keeping her hands folded neatly in her lap.

Daniel suddenly cleared his throat and then looked at Kestreel, a flush on his cheeks, "oh, yeah... well... I have a guest tonight, too. You... you remember Katie, right?"
 
Kestreel, looked at Kate and smiled. How could he forget about her. She would probably hate him to death, probably didn't wanted to see him again. But he was happy to see she was alright. And he knew she most assured had been trough her personal hell all those years, but Kestreel was also sure Daniel and his friends had taken care of her, at least as much as she let them. Kate was like that. Still, he felt glad to see her again, even if he had already forget her, Kestreel knew deep inside of him there would be always room for her. A small place in his non-existent heart for that once little girl, now a grown up woman, who barely looked like that girl he left back five years ago. "Hello, Princess."
 
Princess. That one simple word had Kate's heart racing inside of her head and all kinds of butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. His voice sounded like they had never been seperated - so warm and sultry, familiar, it just felt like home all over again. He was just as wide across the shoulders as Kate remembered, his form still sculpted beautifully, though barely visible underneath his dark t-shirt and jeans. Dark hair tousled and chocolate eyes daring, Kate couldn't help but get lost in him all over again.

Slowly she stood from the couch, facing the two men and trying to make sense of her emotions. Her heart was swelling, as though it was regrowing the love that she had once felt for this man. Any sense of hatred or distaste for this man fled; all she remembered was the long nights they spent together, making wonderful love or just holding each other. Kate sighed softly.

"Hello," she whispered, a smile smile emerging on her lips. Daniel too was smiling; the bond between the two of them, even after all of these years, was still apparent. But Kate would wait to see if Kestreel made the first move, if he truly hadn't forgotten her.
 
Kestreel looked at his little big girl. Those lips sure had been in other mouths, those hips sure had been touched by other hands. Sure that body had been in many other men during all this time. Still, now that Kestreel had seen her, he was unable to take out that little splinter in his chest. But he also knew how could he take that splinter out. Kestreel walked close to Kate and put his strong hands on her shoulders, looking down at her eyes like many times he could remember doing. "I missed you." Muttered him, then he rose her chin with one of his fingers and kissed her.
 
For a long moment Kate just stood there, frozen in place. His lips were warm and wonderful against her, but it took a couple of seconds for the shock to wear off.
His scent and body, so wonderfully familiar, wrapped around her like a blanket, and Kate was sure that she would never full away from him away. And then her slender arms wrapped around his waist, holding him closer and drawing him near. When their lips finally parted their bodies did not, and Kate held himself close against him. He was softer in some spots, no doubt a product of his age, but because of his hard work all of this time, he was still broad and muscular. Kate didn't want to leave him, not now, not ever again. It was truly amazing how her heart could remember him even after half a decade. A lot had happened in that time, and for those years, Kate was sure that she had gotten over him.... that she did not love him anymore. But now that his arms were wrapped back around her, his heart pounding against her chest, Kate recalled why exactly she had been bound to him.

"I missed you too, Kest," she murmured against his jacket, "and... and I love you."
 
Being there like this with the one he had ever loved felt like he had never gone before. It was like those five last years had just disappeared, vanished the same instant their lips touched again. "Princess... I'm not going to force you... But I want you to come with me." Muttered looking at her. Kestreel wanted to take her away from there and take her to the place she deserved and belonged to; by his side, in a Caribbean beach, with no concern or duty for the rest of their lives, ever again. "What do you say, will you forgive me?"
 
Kate looked at Keatreel and realized tht he had changed a lot in the five years that they had been apart. He was certainly a little more neatly groomed, though he still sported that stubble she had grown to love so much. He wore nicer clothing though it was still dark and fit him nicely.
Ans then Kate realized what was so different about him - Kestreel was no longer a dark looking hit an paid only when he realized a job. He had surely completed his mission in China and as a result, gaining all that money that Kate had been stunned by when she had been given the number.

Kate looked at him for a long moment, surveying his expression and wondering if that was what she really wanted.
But in the end, Kate knew that she had little to lose and everything to gain. Kate had lived Kestreel for a very long time and didn't feel as though that was going to change.
"Go where?" she whispered softly.
 
"Wherever you want, Princess." Replied him. The world was for them to enjoy, everything they wanted to do was now available for them. Everyplace she could dream of he could take her to. But it was her choice to do so or not. Kestreel knew he had hurt her badly, but all he wanted now was to take her out of whatever misery she was in and save her once more, giving her more than she could have ever imagined.

Daniel, who was really happy, was doing little hops around the couple, pushing gently Kate every now and then, telling things like 'say yes' ' don't be silly' or 'go for it'. It even looked like Daniel was more thrilled about this whole encounter than any of the others were, specially that manly redheaded. Seriously, did she had even said a word this whole time? Or even since they knew her?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back