Ugly Good Bad

[Meraki]

Eliza closed her eyes for grace. She was not religious in the least bit, but she had learned from Linda and being in a very Italian-Catholic city how to show proper respect. She took the moment instead to just calm her mind down and take a breath. Rhett nudged her gently and the ghost of a smile appeared on her lips, but not bright enough to be seen by anyone else but him. Once the grace was over, she started into the food and accepted the green beans from Rhett graciously. The food was fantastic, it smelled mouthwatering but when she finally snuck in a small bite, she understood why Rhett was so ready to come down for this. It filled her with a warmth she hadn't had in a long time.

Maybe they did need to come here, this meal was making everything better.

Eliza did not overstep boundaries and speak unless spoken to, so she made rather great friends with her wine until she saw one of Rhett's uncles reach over the table and top off her glass. "So Eliza, what'd you think of our little town? Different than New York?"

"It's like night and day," she admitted, "but I loved it. Rhett and I took the horses out today and I've never seen beautiful sights like that. New York is a lot of buildings and slush."

She was trying to listen to Rhett's conversation with his mother and she was a bit taken back by her question about another job. They had never talked about it, but she did not let it show on her face. Instead, she took a deep sip of wine and kept on eating. There was no reason to get worked up over something so small. He redirected the question like a lawyer would, and Eliza let it go. If he wanted to talk to her about it, he would, but he was right. Now was not the right time to do much of anything that didn't involve figuring out their next steps with Sylvia and Robinson.

"I like this," Nikki commented as she ate, sitting on Eliza's left and picking up a few strands of Eliza's hair.

"Thanks," Eliza smirked, "I made it myself."

"Thank you for this, Mrs. Wolfhart," Eliza looked up at Rhett's mother, nothing but genuine honesty in her voice, "This is easily the best dinner I've ever had." As people spooned for seconds, Eliza did not hesitate to help herself.

 

[Nav]

Rhett's mother let the conversation between them when Eliza thanked her, and she gave a small nod in acknowledgement. "It's nothing," she answered with a wave of her hand, "Just a little something I whipped together. You should see Thanksgiving—or, oh, Christmas dinner. Rhett could really tell you about the spread there, isn't that right, Rhett?"

Rhett stirred, his mouth full of green beans that he hastily swallowed down to put in his remark. "Oh, yea," he agreed, "Everyone with even a drop of Wolfhart blood in them comes down and there is a statistical average of one-hundred and sixteen point four-two plates for passing every year," he answered lamely, garnering a sigh from his mother for his mathematical accuracy. "It's movie-quality insanity, I assure you." Rhett bit down on his forkful of green beans as if to punctuate his statement as there wasn't really much he could add to 'Wolfhart Christmas' more than 'insanity.'

Having finished up his plate of seconds, Rhett settled comfortably full into his seat and polished off the last of his wine before moving on to his water. He sipped it comfortably, letting everything settle into his stomach comfortably. Now, all he wanted to do was make his way up the stairs and promptly crawl into bed and they hadn't even made it through dessert yet. As the main meal wrapped up, the clearing of the table began only to replace the wine glasses with coffee mugs and the dinner plates with dessert plates.

"Coffee, everyone?" Rhett's mother asked, pulling the pot out of the coffee maker and beginning to fill up everyone's mugs. Rhett was glad for it, feeling as though he'd right well pass out at the table if he didn't get something in him soon. Funny, he couldn't force himself to sleep in New York if he wanted to, but in Wisconsin, he was practically dozing off at any given chance.

His coffee mug was half gone by the time his mother had made it all the way around the table and back to the counter so she could begin to slice the pie into small pieces. "Who wants pie?"

 

[Meraki]

Eliza was certain she didn't know family the way the Wolfhart family did, but when his mother waved her off and brushed the comment aside, she could almost see Linda. It was the closet person to a mother figure that she could remember, though glimpses of her own mother filtered in and out occasionally. She wondered a lot of things in that house – if her own mother would have been the same way, if she would have looked at Rhett the same way Mrs. Wolfhart was looking at her. She wondered if they would have a spread of food every year, no matter how old she got, and she wondered if given the chance to have more kids if her parents would have. They were all silly questions, she knew that. Nothing would ever change the fact that her parents did not get that chance and "would have been" or "could have been" were both entirely useless. All Eliza could do was guess, but she was beginning to understand it now.

Maybe she could never have answers, but the ideas she had dreamed up in her head made it hurt less. It didn't make her angrier, it made her grateful for any time she got to spend with them. It would have been a wonderful family, a wonderful life, but that didn't stop Eliza from living with what she had.

Because what she had wasn't pretty terrible either.

"Sounds like it," Eliza smiled at Rhett, squeezing his hand under the table affectionately. She thanked his mother warmly when she filled up her coffee mug and placed a slice of pie in front of her. It had been a long while since she ate anything but processed, store bought pie and she certainly enjoyed every bite of it. The table had fallen a bit quieter as the night went on, everyone consumed in their coffee and pie, children yawning as the night lingered on and Eliza felt strangely content.

Her shoulder ached, but it was hardly noticeable when she felt so warm. It was just an overall feeling of contentment and relaxation that she hadn't felt in quite some time. Sure, she was still on edge with his family around, still worried about what was going to happen when they went back to New York, questioning what her future could and should hold – but this was just a moment. A nice, quiet moment.

Once everyone began excusing themselves from the table, Eliza turned to Rhett. "I think I'm going to go upstairs and relax a bit, you wanna come?"

 

[Nav]

Pie had never been Rhett's favorite food.

It was probably the texture; the texture had never appealed to him. It had a sort of gelatinous quality to it that always reminded him of a terrible scene in a horror movie he watched as a kid where the big bad gnawed on someone's eyeballs. He imagined pie filling had the same texture as eyeballs, and it had turned him off from the food forever. Of course, he was smart enough to know that eyeball texture did not mean pie was not delicious, but he just couldn't get over it, no matter how logically his body tried to overcome the conundrum. So, when his mother began to serve out pie, she deliberately skipped over Rhett and let him attend only to his coffee instead.

He seemed content with his coffee though, sipping it down happily bit by bit while people attacked their pies. People finished quick, everyone seeming to be eager to get to bed to rest… watch TV or read a book. Even Eliza seemed ready, and he was happy to turn to her when she began to speak. "Sure," he agreed with a smile, "I'll be right up after I help mom clean up."

"Oh no you won't," she chimed in a moment later, "You go rest. You can help me tomorrow, but you look absolutely dreadful. Get some rest," she said, giving him a shooing sign with her hand. "Nikki can help me out tonight."

A reluctant smile later, Rhett obliged with a nod. "Alright, guess that settles it. Let's go," he finished the last sip of his coffee and rose to his feet. Slipping his hand happily through Eliza's, he gave her a coaxing tug and squeeze before leading the way back up the stairs that squeaked under his weight with every step he took. The flight of stairs leading up to the attic caused him to groan in protest as he lugged himself up them. "I've been eating to much," he decided aloud, "I never eat like this in New York. I feels like I swallowed a damn brick. Did you know the esophagus is the narrowest part of the digestive tract?"

 

[Meraki]

Rhett tugged her upstairs and Eliza felt the weight of the week sort of just settle into her shoulders. It was nice to get the reprieve. Horseback riding and exploring was enjoyable but it still didn't change the fact that Eliza was so far out her comfort zone that it was physically taxing on her. Her shoulder ached, her muscles cried out for a moment of rest, and for the first time in a long time Eliza really just wanted to sleep. It was a strange sensation, too. She had spent so much of her life overworking herself to hide from the demons and push down the fear, but something had changed since meeting Rhett. It was like she was capable, for once, of allowing herself a moment to just be.

She didn't have to be strong or resilient or quick-minded, just be.

"I've never had this much homemade food before," she laughed as they settled into Rhett's room. Even with the heat of the house, the drafty attic made her reach rather quickly for some sweatpants to change. His comment about the esophagus made her smile and she just shook her head, "The human body is weird. I remember when I was in the hospital and they were telling me all about my lung and I just…I could never be a doctor. Scratch that one off the possible career change list."

"Your mother is an incredible cook, though. Esophagus size be damned, I still managed to eat my body weight in mashed potatoes."

Eliza changed rather quickly and then groaned as she more or less flopped into bed. She scrambled a bit to bury herself beneath the covers but propped her head up on her hand to watch Rhett as he, too, readied for bed. A yawn escaped her, the warmth of the bed filling her with a moment of ease. Her shoulder ached, sure, but it always just felt so much better when she took a moment to just lie there. "Did you ever want anything like this?"

Her question probably came abruptly, but as always, her mind was reeling through thought after thought. It wasn't necessarily negative, just pondering that she never really got a chance to let herself entertain. "I know you said farm life wasn't for you, but I mean the big house, family dinners, domestic life."

 

[Nav]

"Did I ever want this?"

The question gripped him tightly around the chest like a steel hand, the fingers of which pinched his ribs to a point where it felt like the bone was going to slice straight through his fleshy lungs. He wasn't even sure how to begin answering such a question. Sure, the idea of a Brady Bunch style existence was appealing, but real life wasn't a sitcom. The life Rhett had grown up in was tumultuous and unintentionally abusive, though in an entirely different way than what Eliza was familiar with. After thirty minutes, the show didn't end… the credits didn't roll… no one shouted 'cut!'

It was many long, long years of misunderstanding, shame, and deep-seated self-loathing. The big family life was ideal for those like Nikki… those who just sort of fit in, but Rhett had never been happy under that roof. It didn't mean he didn't love his parents, his siblings, his extended family and it certainly didn't mean they didn't love him, but that certainly made it a difficult question to answer. "Truthfully speaking, I'm not sure this is a life I could live comfortably. Despite hating it for many, many years, I was given an incredible gift. It is a curse more often than it's a blessing, but to give up being able to use this curse… or blessing… to help as many people as I can? I don't think I could justifiably give that up to do… this."

"I mean, don't get me wrong," he continued, settling down at the edge of the bed and glancing back to Eliza, "What my parents and sisters do is great and if they're happy, that's all that's important to me, but I don't know… I guess I always thought there was more to life than getting married, having kids, retiring, moving to Florida, and dying."

Kicking his legs over the edge of the bed, Rhett relaxed back into the pillows with a lazy, overly stuffed sigh. She was right about at least one thing though, his mother sure was a good cook. He couldn't remember the last time he had so thoroughly enjoyed a meal, though it was hard when most of his meals were microwaved or came in a little white carton box from Little China.

"So, what about this for a job change, Eliza Madison? Do you want a big house, lots of kids, big home-cooked dinners every night of the week?"

 

[Meraki]

"I can understand that."

And she could, perhaps more deeply than he realized. Maybe she wasn't a genius, but she had spent so long being let down by the system, abused by it, that it only really ever made sense for her to have a hand in changing it. She got to save lives – not always, but every once in a while she managed to be the detective that Robinson had been to her all those years ago. Maybe his motives were disgusting and crude, but there was no denying that he changed her entire path. She sure as hell wouldn't have been defending the law, she would have been tried by it and probably ended up in prison.

It was strange to think about, but it didn't make her spine curl the way the words Eliza and baby did.

"That is definitely a loaded question," Eliza murmured, mulling it over for a few beats before exhaling. "I wouldn't know the first thing about any of this. I can barely keep my laundry off the floor and I know I could never ever spend my life at home. I just – I get stir crazy."

"And kids," Eliza shook her head, "I don't know. The whole concept terrifies me. I couldn't imagine being a mother. I'd probably be terrible at it, worrying that my kind of fucked-up was somehow genetic. I don't know. I just get really irrational when I think about it." She laughed a bit of a self-deprecating laugh, but flickered her blue eyes up to him for a moment. "I'd like a life in the middle. You know, one of those nice Manhattan town houses, so it's like the love child between a house and apartment. Home cooked dinners when I can manage, but never feeling guilty about takeout. Plenty of time to do my job, but also learn how to step away from it sometimes."

"Which is also a terrifying concept considering the fact if you asked me six months ago, I would have told you everything I had was enough. So, this is all brand new to me, I guess. I always thought I'd hate it because I never knew a life like this. It doesn't really fit me, not sure it ever will, but there are certainly aspects that I think I could learn to appreciate a bit more. I don't need a big family, but having a real family for once is something that changed my outlook I guess."

She scooted a bit closer to him so she could sort of drape herself over his side. It was loving in a very Eliza way. Never a shouted declaration, but shown and felt in the small touches and comments. "I really wouldn't have anything to complain about if it was just you and me," she said softly, "that's all the family I need."

 

[Nav]

"A lovechild, huh?" he chuckled softly as he laid back, resting comfortably against the familiar bed. He wondered then how many nights he had spent staring up at that exact ceiling—counting the cracks in the drywall, dividing by the number of times the old oak tree tapped its branches against the window, adding the rotations of the drying machine downstairs (it was so noisy even Rhett could hear it in his attic). This time, he just closed his eyes though and tuned out all of those extraneous noises, instead focusing on the number patterns in his own head. Her thoughts on the future were a tall order, that was for sure. Eliza had never really been the type to enjoy 'learning how to step away from it sometimes.'

He knew she meant it, but a part of him couldn't help but wonder if that's what she'd actually be able to do. The first time they had shared a dinner together had been over her desk at the police station. She had done a lot to separate from work, but was it a matter of circumstance or desire? Rhett wasn't even sure he knew for himself, though pulling away from a self-owned business was a different beast.

As she scooted closer, he pulled his arm across her shoulders and let her rest against his side. It was very comfortable and familiar. "Well, you don't need to know if this is the type of life you want, 'cause I don't think you'll ever get something like this with me." If nothing else, Rhett knew who he was and no matter how he had tried, he was not a farmboy. He was never again going to want to own land for crops and cows and horses, though he wasn't entirely sure if he wanted New York, either. Nothing, no place, had ever felt like it had truly suited him entirely though maybe that was the human dilemma… perhaps no one ever felt like they truly belonged anywhere.

"Well," he rolled his head to the side, pressing a kiss right against her hairline, "You and I is something I think I can manage and promise you. The rest… the rest we'll just have to let come in its own time, then."

Predicting the future was always something Rhett had tried to do. Moving to New York, being a lawyer, opening a practice… they had all been very articulated and well-thought out processes. He always thought he knew what was going to come and when, but Eliza had changed all that… Eliza's case had changed all of that. After a while, he learned to stop trying to predict.

 

[Meraki]

"You can promise me you and I, huh?" Eliza smirked into his chest, her eyes closed gently. She was lucky too, because the emotion that flashed through her mind was not one she was comfortable sharing with anyone, really. Her entire life all she had ever wanted to feel was wanted, and to hear him say those simple words struck a chord in her she wasn't ready to feel. But it filled her with warmth and excitement and love, all at once. Linda was stuck with her, her parents had given birth to her, but Rhett chose her. That was the part of this that baffled her more than anything else. He knew her, and he continued to choose her every single day, over and over again.

"That's more than anyone has ever done, you know."

It was a simple, quiet statement, but Eliza fell in time with his breathing. Slow, steady, strong. Maybe the future was terrifying, but she would not rule anything out. Whatever the future threw at them, they would face. Come hell or high-water…babies, or whatever. Part of her was glad that Sylvia had driven them out of New York for a bit. Being here with Rhett, learning about his life and insecurities, understanding where he came from – it made them stronger. She had to face her demons and he had to face his, and these quiet moments where the gears in their mind were turning rapidly she knew were the moments they grew. Someday they would have to head back to New York. Someday they would have to face all that they had done and seen and experienced. Today, though? Today they were free to make good on that promise.

You and I.

She pressed a kiss against his chest, the warmth seeping through him, and she felt content. A genuine contentment. She didn't entirely mean to, but Eliza fell too in rhythm with his heart and soon enough she was falling asleep against his chest. It was a dreamless sleep, something she hadn't had in such a long time, and it was restful enough to lull the aching in her shoulder. It hurt, sure, but it was hardly the pain she had felt the last few days. The cold didn't do it much good, but a good night's sleep in bed was sure to do the trick. Eliza woke exactly where she had fallen asleep, no tossing or turning, and she blinked her eyes a few times at the dawn. It was early. The kind of early she was used to at the precinct, but the two of them had been sleeping so much lately that it almost seemed impossible to be up.

She glanced up, through the mess of black hair on her head, to flash her dawn-drenched blue eyes in his direction. "Mmm," she hummed, "Good morning."

"What time is it? I slept like the dead."

 

[Nav]

Eliza might have had a rough childhood, but finding someone to pick you was an age old problem and definitely wasn't exclusive to her. Often, people chose another for all the wrong reasons: so they didn't have to be alone, because it was 'the best they could do,' because it was what society dictated. To find someone to pick you for you was a challenge, it would seem. It was a wonder then if half the parents in the world would have chosen their children, had they been able to choose them like one would puppies. Surely, his parents would not have chosen Rhett. They loved him, but they wouldn't have chosen him and he was oddly okay with that. They loved him even if they wouldn't have chosen him, and that was more than good enough.

"I don't think I do as much as you think I do," he commented gently. She had always thought so highly of him, even when he didn't feel like he was doing much of anything worth noting. Loving someone was enough of its own reward but it was nice to hear that she always seemed to think he was doing a marvelous job, even when he felt like he was always falling short. Before long, he felt her drifting off. Her body grew heavy, her head lulled deeper into the crook of his shoulder, and her breath grew steady and deep. He let her sleep, though Rhett's evening was not so peaceful.

Most of the night was spent staring at the ceiling. Before, he had just been too tired to care, but now that he felt he had been getting sleep routinely, he realized the room… the entire house… made him mildly uncomfortable. Insomnia held on to him tight, though he managed to drift off periodically. Still, by the time Eliza's limp body began to shift and awaken, he had already been awake for a number of hours.

"Early," he replied, letting his eyes saunter to the corner of his vision to make out the edge of his cheek, "Very early. We went to bed super early." After all, they had only gone to bed moments after dinner, which had been about seven o'clock. It was no wonder she was up before the dawn. Even breakfast hadn't been started downstairs, and that's how he knew it was really early. "It seemed like you slept well, how do you feel?"

Though he hadn't slept much, he was feeling comfortable in bed. He liked how warm it was below the blankets and how cold the draft felt against his cheeks and nose. It was all very welcoming.

 

[Meraki]

"Mmmmmmmm," Eliza hummed a bit louder, burying her face into his chest at the realization that it really was nearly dawn. It hadn't even occurred to her that they had gone to bed so early the night before. It was nice though. The first night they were here, she passed out so hard it felt like dragging herself out of a coma, but this was nice. She was still sleepy yes, but it was a good kind of sleepy. A gentle yawn and a stretch, but completely content with never leaving this bed again. That's how she felt.

"I was so exhausted yesterday after the cold, horses and dinner. I haven't slept that well in a long time. Usually I'm tossing and turning so much that I near elbow you in the face on a constant basis," she laughed, though her voice was soft to preserve the gentleness of the room. There was just enough light, just a cool enough draft and more than enough warmth under the covers for Eliza to feel content. These were the kind of moments that made facing the world again tough.

"I feel better," she admitted, shifting her shoulder just a bit to test her rotator cuff, "My shoulders still a bit stiff but that's pretty obvious. It's not throbbing, though, which is a first since I hurt it."

Or since someone else nearly broke it off, but those were little details.

"How are you?" she asked, glancing up at him and taking in the tired look in his eyes, "Couldn't sleep? Something on your mind? Though, that's a stupid question in retrospect."

"Everything alright, though?"

 

[Nav]

"Glad to see the sleep is doing it some good."

And it was, certainly. Her shoulder showed increased mobility and flexibility, which was always one of the first signs of healing. In fact, everything about her seemed a little bit better, a little bit brighter. Her face was expressive and alert, even as she purred and mashed her face into his chest, her eyes were bright, and judging from the lack of reaction when she twisted her shoulder, her injury was feeling better. "And for the record, you're usually nearly nailing me with your elbow in my face, chest, neck, head… elsewhere." He wanted to clarify that she very rarely went easy on him, so the nice relaxed night had been a wonderful reprieve for his life and limbs.

When the conversation turned around to him, he ended up smiling and giving a little bit of a lame shrug. "Yea, I dunno," he admitted, "Sometimes I just don't sleep well. It's hard, you know… to turn it off." His brain was a constant stream of information and like a little kid sat in front of a television, it was an overwhelming river of lights, colors, sounds, and moving things. Television sets just had a convenient power switch, but his brain was never quite so easy. Sometimes, it got the better of him and that evening just happened to be one of those times. It happened and Rhett had long since accepted it as a fact of his life.

"I mean, everything is alright and nothing I could point out is wrong, but it's just difficult sometimes. Still, that's nothing for you to worry about." There wasn't much she could do about it, anyways, except force herself to stay awake with him and he wouldn't want that. No one should have to suffer for his own little quirky problems. "I'm sure I'll take a nap later or something. I might as well, we have the time." Though Rhett didn't like that, either. He felt a jitter deep in his bones and he realized that some of his sleep deprivation might have stemmed from idleness. Nothing ever got under his skin quite like feeling so listless. He missed work, though he was appreciating his time with Eliza. A small piece of him even began to miss his drugs; at least the thoughtless, mindless, deep-set sleep that came with them. A frown momentarily twitched the corner of his lips as he swept those thoughts from his mind.

He had been doing too well to relapse, but then again...

No. He shook his head once and glanced to her. "I guess all we have left to do today is figure out what we're going to do. It's a shame we didn't come in the summer, we could have gone berry picking."

 

[Meraki]

"Okay, just gotta make sure you know," she smiled, "I'm just really proud of you. I wish I could make things easier."

She always did. For as hard as Eliza Madison was, deep down she was empathetic and kind hearted. She never became a detective for the glory or the violence, it was because of what she could do. All she ever wanted in the world was a purpose. She knew how hard Rhett was working and she couldn't even imagine what he was feeling with the return home coupled with the withdrawal, but he somehow made it happen. He couldn't sleep, but he was there with her, figuratively standing on his own two feet. She was really proud of him, endlessly in fact. Maybe it seemed menial to him, but she had watched him intimately over the past few months. He had endured so much.

But he was still here and while she knew nothing really of addiction, she knew what it was like to fight through hell to come out standing on the other side.

"I have no idea," she hummed peacefully, "I'm not used to having so much free time. It's almost a little unsettling, y'know? Like I have no idea what to do besides sleep."

"What did you guys used to do for fun when you were kids around here? I think my shoulders capable of braving the cold for quite a while today if we want to go out and do something. Otherwise, I've got no idea. My brain's always groggy before breakfast."

 

[Nav]

It took a lot of weight off his shoulders when Eliza told him she was proud of him, even though he felt like he was barely struggling and scraping through every obstacle. He didn't always feel successful, mostly because his little private practice wasn't some flourishing wealth, and he certainly didn't feel like a healthy sane individual with the drugs, and of course, running away from the problems in New York did nothing to make him feel like what a proper man should be. It was one hit to his morale after another, though he had never had much self-confidence to begin with.

Maybe it wouldn't have been so easy in New York. At least in Wisconsin, he didn't really have access to medication—though he knew his mother was better off not knowing. "Yep, it is a little unsettling," he agreed, sitting up and running his hands through his hair. It took a little effort, but he did finally manage to time the wild strands of hair going off in all directions.

"Well, when were kids, we were in school," he reminded her, "But on weekends and after school, we'd spend all day out in the snow. We'd ice-skate, ride the horses, build snow forts… the whole thing." Summer was always the best time of year because there was so much more to do, but it wasn't summer so he wasn't even going to entertain the idea any longer. "Alright, well, if you're too groggy before breakfast, we ought to wait for it to be cooked. Not that my mother would let me take you anywhere without first making sure you've eaten, of course."

His mother would have been floored and offended had they gone off before having eaten. Better to eat than to offend the head of the household. "It'll still be a little while though," he shrugged, glancing to the clock that had just flipped over to '5:00.' Glancing over his shoulder back at Eliza, he smiled warmly and rolled on to his stomach so his arms were on either sides of her. "I'm sure we can find a way to pass the time, though."

 

[Meraki]

"Well, we can't have your mother resenting me, now can we?" Eliza laughed as Rhett rolled over on top of her. It only served to pull a bright, genuine smile from her lips and she glanced up at him. It was strange sometimes to think of how he came into her life and while it was crisis after crisis, these small quiet moments just proved to her that there was really something between them. They had come together out of a mutual need, but stayed together because it was what they wanted.

She never thought she could wake up and get lost in someone's eyes, but Rhett's always seemed to draw her in.

"Oh, do you now?" she smirked. There were so many people in his house, but Eliza had made it through her entire teenage years without Linda finding the boys in her bedroom. Surely she could find it in her to be a bit quieter than usual. "We could always play Go," she teased, humming playfully to herself, "that's definitely what I want right now."

With a bit of a tug, Eliza brought Rhett down until he was settled between her legs and she could reach his lips. It wasn't a desperate kiss, but Eliza certainly had needs. She remembered waking up from her drug induced haze and thinking to herself how much she wanted to just throw herself at Rhett. She'd been legitimately scared about what was going to happen, especially in that alleyway waiting and not knowing whether he would ever find her. So in her mind they certainly earned this. Just a little selfish moment for the two of them. They'd racked up plenty of near-death experiences to warrant that much.

"I love you," she breathed out between kisses, the slightest smirk ever present on her lips.

 

[Nav]

"Oh, you want to play Go?" he chuckled softly, "You know, you say that like a joke, but if anything will ever distract me from your feminine allures, it would be Go… you know that right? Don't tempt me."

Everything in life was made of Baroque rules that could only be created by humans: crude, coarse, unrefined. It had always been Go that was so elegant, organic, and rigorously logical that if intelligent life forms existed elsewhere in the universe, Rhett was convinced they'd most certainly play Go. He had never imagined he would find another thing in his worldly existence that was quite as exquisite in the vulgar and materialistic world as the board game. It was a refined balance of his own mind that was so pure, he didn't believe it possible for such equilibrium to be achieved anywhere else, yet as he settled comfortably against Eliza's body, he found himself in a more peaceful state that the equal division of the three-hundred and sixty stones of black and white.

The sex was always wonderful, but there was something entirely psychological about the whole experience—about the small stolen kisses, or the whispered 'I love yous' that were told like little secrets. Mentally chiropractic, yes, but the way they ended up tangled in the sheets was enough to make him laugh as he flopped into the pillows and curled his arms around Eliza's bare shoulders.

"So, about that Go game…?" he glanced over to the clock. At some point during their little romp, breakfast had begun to be made because he had just begun to smell it and hear the casual noises of pots and pans being banged around. "We still have enough time before breakfast," he teased, pressing a gentle peck into her cheek.

"Do you know the average time a person spends kissing during their lifetime is 20,160 minutes? If you do the math, that's about 336 hours." He hummed softly, his nose brushing against the pulse point in her neck as he pressed a string of kisses along her collarbone, "That's a long time, but sadly, not nearly enough."

 

[Meraki]

Eliza could feel the tension in her mind ease.

With his arms around her bare shoulders, Eliza settled against his chest and exhaled a soft laugh. Never in her life had she expected there to be a time where she actually basked in the afterglow, where she let someone trace their hands along the marred skin of her back. She loved Rhett but even after the admittance, there was always a shiver that seemed to run up her spine whenever his fingers trailed over her skin. It was the first time she could remember just being entirely content, where no scar or demon or responsibility haunted her in the back of her mind. It was intoxicating, really. She could have lived a thousand lifetimes like this.

She was sure of that much.

"You're impossible," Eliza teased as his lips trailed against her skin. First her cheek, then her collarbone, and the tenderness was enough to make her toes curl happily.

"That's fourteen days, right?" Eliza hummed after a moment of thought. Mental long division was never her forte, but math never gave her as much trouble as Chemistry did in high school. "Two whole weeks of kissing in a lifetime? Absolutely not. Not enough time at all."

"Also, this is the point where you look at me and pretend to be impressed that I can still do division. Little victories, right?"

She pressed a kiss to his temple as his lips occupied themselves with her pulse point. The draft of the room seemed to disappear entirely against the heat from the covers and their bodies. She could hear noises downstairs and she hoped that his mother didn't hear anything, but maybe if she did she would actually believe that Eliza was Rhett's girlfriend. Eliza had stopped needing validation a long time ago, but it would be a nice. Like an added bonus.

 

[Nav]

"I'm impossible?" he scoffed, feigning indignation though Rhett had never been very good at feigning emotions (except, oddly enough, sternness when in the courtroom) causing him to quickly chuckle. "Yes, I suppose I am, unfortunately, but it seems like you're not completely hopeless in math. Yes, it's about fourteen days." His mind quickly disassembled the number into as many different variations of itself as it could—always computing, always calculating, even at his calmest state. It was funny, even with Eliza in their tangled up, naked embrace, his mind was always a busy rush. She didn't change the chemistry of who he was at his core. She didn't shake his neurons and change their shape. She didn't do any of that.

The fact of the matter was that his brain kept working the same with or without her, but with her, it faded into the background. It became as easy to ignore as classical music lightly playing over a pleasant movie scene. Present, but not intrusive like it normally was.

"I'm sorry? Was that meant to impress me? Hm, I should let my face know," he teased, tilting his head back and catching a glimpse of her face with amusement. "Eliza, I am fascinated and impressed by you for a great number of reasons, but your skills in math does not happen to be one of them. Let's leave me to the math and you to the detective work, hm?" he pressed one last kiss to her cheek before rolling to the edge of the bed and sitting up. Their little romp did nothing to help the matter of his hair and he attempted one more time to push the dark, lightly curled, locks back and away from his face but nothing helped at this point. Eventually, he just gave up and rose to his feet, going to fish out a clean pair of slacks and a casual t-shirt.

"It's been so long since I've just worn t-shirts all day every day," he mentioned casually, not really expecting a response, but more made out of casual observation. Rhett, back in New York, was the someone that people would have described as the 'type to have been born in a suit.' He always looked slick and well dressed, even if his suits weren't high-end, personally tailored articles.

"Well, what do you think? Should we proceed to the breakfast parade? Once we eat, I'm going to shower and we can decide what we want to do from there. Think if you have any suggestions, otherwise, I'm not really sure what we can do."

 

[Meraki]

"Be my guest," Eliza chuckled as she watched Rhett rise from the bed and brush his hands through his hair. There wasn't anything wrong with stopping and appreciating the view in front of her, now was there? Of course not. "We're lucky I even passed math and got out of high school. I'm pretty sure I only passed Calculus my senior year because Mr. Anderson liked how I looked. I definitely didn't deserve that C-."

With a hum of contentment, Eliza stretched out across the bed for a moment, just letting her joints all settle into place and muscles loosen. She couldn't look entirely over her shoulder, but there was still major bruising along her shoulder blade that licked over her collarbone ever so slightly. It was certainly healing well, but something told her the bruising would take the most time. After all, if she remembered correctly, Rhett had yanked it back while a client of his pressed her knee down onto Eliza's chest. Not the gentlest way of popping it back in. But it was fine. She took stock of her other wounds as well. There were a few nicks on her body that had started to heal over and she could feel the slightest bump against her neck, still a bit sensitive to the touch, where the needle had been thrust into her body.

She would have loved to know exactly what it was she was drugged with, but they would probably never have the chance to find out.

"Yeah, might as well," Eliza agreed as she slipped from the bed and let her bare feet hit the cold floor. It sent a jolt through her that woke her up entirely. Grabbing a pair of pants, Eliza wiggled them on before throwing on a light sweater – just something to hold in the little warmth she could manage. Her hair was a wild mane of thick, black hair but it was easy enough to detangle. She always considered herself lucky that she didn't look like a complete ogre when she woke up, but she got that from her mother. At least, that's what Eliza could tell from the pictures.

"I'll think on it," Eliza smiled and slipped her hand through his own. Just on cue, her stomach growled and she let out a laugh almost immediately. "Now let's go, I think my stomach is about to riot from lack of food."

 

[Nav]

Like always, breakfast was a busy affair. Everywhere one looked, there were stacks of food. Eggs, ham, fried potatoes, and piles of pancakes. A tureen of fresh fruit sat at the center of the table next to a large glass pitcher of orange juice. Splatters of food blotted the kitchen counter as his mother worked, tirelessly, to make the same large breakfast she did every morning.

"Morning, mom," Rhett said as he stepped into the kitchen, coming up alongside the shorter, older woman to press a kiss to her cheek. She paused just long enough to tilt her head against the peck. "What can I help with?" He asked, but the woman just shot him a glance like she was offended and shooed him out of her kitchen towards the dining area. She didn't give a verbal response, she didn't need to. The day she accepted helping cooking the family breakfast would be the same day she was too old to stand, to hold a whisk, to open the stove door. Rhett, being the gentleman he was, asked every morning though, even though he already knew the answer.

"Well," Rhett mumbled as he stepped back to Eliza, cupping her waist lightly, "I guess that's that. Let's take a seat." A kiss found her cheek too before he found a spot and settled into a chair. He poured himself some orange juice and relished the temporarily quiet dining room, knowing in a few minutes, it'd be overrun with children trying to eat before the school bus arrived and their parents scrambling to shove homework into backpacks. "Maybe we should go out today," Rhett thought aloud, "And, you know, discuss about…" he caught himself, "Things, in New York, and what we want to do about them."

They'd have to go back eventually; they'd have to sort through whatever was waiting for them in that city. Within only a few moments, the kitchen flooded with kids and parents, just like he had anticipated. Food was tossed hastily onto plates and passed around. It was more food than Rhett stocked in his flat in a week, but without even thinking about it, he quickly dug in, not realizing how hungry he was until there was food straight in front of him.

"So, what do you think?" Rhett inquired between bites of pancakes, "About going out for a little bit today? Hit up a dinner or a bar? Wisconsin is known for its cheese curds, you know."