- Invitation Status
- Looking for partners
- Posting Speed
- Speed of Light
- Multiple posts per day
- 1-3 posts per day
- One post per day
- Multiple posts per week
- 1-3 posts per week
- One post per week
- Slow As Molasses
- Online Availability
- Whenever my boss decides to let me go home. (Usually between 5-11 EST)
- Writing Levels
- Advanced
- Prestige
- Douche
- Adaptable
- Preferred Character Gender
- Male
- Female
- Primarily Prefer Female
- Genres
- Modern, Futuristic, Paranormal, Fantasy, Medieval, Romance, Horror, pretty much everything.
Yesterday, my son came home and told me that two kids on his bus beat him up. One did the actual punching, while the other kept my son from trying to fight back. The first question out of my mouth after I asked if he was okay was 'Did you hit him back?'. I know that this goes against what most schools teach kids about bullying, but this is where I think the school systems are wrong. They tell kids to ignore the bullies, that if they don't pay them any mind, eventually they'll get tired and leave them alone. This line of thinking is complete and utter bullshit.
Ignoring insults does not work. The more a bully is ignored, the more their behavior escalates until they can't be ignored. Insults and teasing leads to shoving and pushing, which quickly turns into fists being thrown. No one can ignore a fist to the face, and that is what ends up happening. I do tell my kids to ignore people if they run their mouth, but I also teach them that if it gets to be too much for them to handle, they need to speak to someone at the school about it. As a parent, my hands are tied unless my kids make a complaint to the school. I can call the school constantly, but if there is no complaint, they can simply tell me they'll look into it then sweep it under the rug. But, I also tell me kids to fight back. I don't give a flying fuck what the school tries to teach them, if someone, I don't care who it is, tries to put their hands on my kids, I told them to hit back until the person who hit them isn't fighting back. People can tell me that's the wrong thing to say all they want, but I honestly believe that is the only true way to get a bully to stop.
But, schools do not teach kids this. They teach kids to continue to be a victim. They tell kids to pretend it's not happening, and it will go away, and when it doesn't, they (the school) will step in to help. Yet, when it does reach that point, it's already too late. The schools do nothing, except continue to spew the same B.S line that ignoring it is the best option, that fighting back is only going to make things worse. And worst of all, when the kid being bullied finally does fight back, they are the ones who end up getting in trouble! Why do they get in trouble? Because they should let someone continue to pound on them. They should let the bully beat them senseless, and appear to not only the bully, but all the other kids as someone who won't fight back. That isn't solving the problem! That is making those being bullied even more of a victim!!! The kids see one person beat someone up without anything happening, and soon enough, everyone is ganging up on that kid because they know they're not going to fight back.
I honestly believe that bullying should no longer be a school handled issue, especially when it evolves into violence. I believe that not only should the student be held legally responsible, but the parents should as well. I know if one of my kids was going around bullying other kids and I found out that they were beating someone up, I'd be the first one to take them to the sheriff's office, at least to scare them into behaving. If that didn't work, than it would be time for them to face responsibility for their actions, whether its by going to juvie, or having to do community service, whatever the court decides. If I had to pay for medical bills, than so be it. My kids are my responsibility, and it's my job to cover their mistakes when they cannot. I wouldn't be happy about it of course, but that is what being a parent means.
I teach my kids that they should be respectful of differences, that a person's skin color, sexual preference, and identity is not something that they should be judged by. I have explained to them a million times that these things are not what make a person who they are, and they shouldn't rush to judgement simply because a person looks or acts a certain way that isn't considered 'normal'. Yet, every day when they go to school they see contradictions to the values that I try to teach them. They see kids being picked on because they're gay, because they're Muslim, or because they're poor. They see adults failing to help out, watching while these kids are bullied to the point where going to school is the most stressful thing in their lives. It's bad enough kids can't even go outside without worrying about pedophiles. They can't run around and play without worrying about some asshole in a car snatching them up off the street. School is supposed to be their safe haven, a place they can go where they know they're protected, but now those schools are becoming the most dangerous place of all.
I think all of us have had to deal with a bully at one point in time, some of us more than others. I know when I was growing up I was picked on constantly because I was not like everyone else. I dressed in thrift store clothing, even though my parents could afford better. I wore generic shoes, and was forced to have my hair cut in ways that were never stylish. My parents were strict, and it was because of that I became the target of everyone's teasing. I ignored it, but I cannot say that it didn't hurt. I was always self-conscious, and my self esteem was extremely low. Fortunately for me I had friends who understood what it was like, and we banded together to get each other through it. Some kids aren't that lucky, and today kids are absolutely heartless. I would have never thought of telling someone to kill themselves, or told someone the world would be better off without them. Who the hell thinks that's okay to say to someone?!?!
Anyway, I digress. What I'm curious about is, what do you guys think is the best way to deal with bullying? Should the police become involved? Should parents of bullied children be allowed to take legal action against the bully in hopes that by hitting the parents in the pocket they might put a stop to their kid's behavior? Truthfully, I believe that it should be a three strike rule. The first offense should result in suspension, the second expulsion, and the last strike should result in the child no longer being accepted in the public school system so that the parents need to either home school, enroll their kid in an online schooling program, or find a private school that does more about the situation that the public schools do. (They kind of have to considering they'll lose money if they don't correct the problem.)
Ignoring insults does not work. The more a bully is ignored, the more their behavior escalates until they can't be ignored. Insults and teasing leads to shoving and pushing, which quickly turns into fists being thrown. No one can ignore a fist to the face, and that is what ends up happening. I do tell my kids to ignore people if they run their mouth, but I also teach them that if it gets to be too much for them to handle, they need to speak to someone at the school about it. As a parent, my hands are tied unless my kids make a complaint to the school. I can call the school constantly, but if there is no complaint, they can simply tell me they'll look into it then sweep it under the rug. But, I also tell me kids to fight back. I don't give a flying fuck what the school tries to teach them, if someone, I don't care who it is, tries to put their hands on my kids, I told them to hit back until the person who hit them isn't fighting back. People can tell me that's the wrong thing to say all they want, but I honestly believe that is the only true way to get a bully to stop.
But, schools do not teach kids this. They teach kids to continue to be a victim. They tell kids to pretend it's not happening, and it will go away, and when it doesn't, they (the school) will step in to help. Yet, when it does reach that point, it's already too late. The schools do nothing, except continue to spew the same B.S line that ignoring it is the best option, that fighting back is only going to make things worse. And worst of all, when the kid being bullied finally does fight back, they are the ones who end up getting in trouble! Why do they get in trouble? Because they should let someone continue to pound on them. They should let the bully beat them senseless, and appear to not only the bully, but all the other kids as someone who won't fight back. That isn't solving the problem! That is making those being bullied even more of a victim!!! The kids see one person beat someone up without anything happening, and soon enough, everyone is ganging up on that kid because they know they're not going to fight back.
I honestly believe that bullying should no longer be a school handled issue, especially when it evolves into violence. I believe that not only should the student be held legally responsible, but the parents should as well. I know if one of my kids was going around bullying other kids and I found out that they were beating someone up, I'd be the first one to take them to the sheriff's office, at least to scare them into behaving. If that didn't work, than it would be time for them to face responsibility for their actions, whether its by going to juvie, or having to do community service, whatever the court decides. If I had to pay for medical bills, than so be it. My kids are my responsibility, and it's my job to cover their mistakes when they cannot. I wouldn't be happy about it of course, but that is what being a parent means.
I teach my kids that they should be respectful of differences, that a person's skin color, sexual preference, and identity is not something that they should be judged by. I have explained to them a million times that these things are not what make a person who they are, and they shouldn't rush to judgement simply because a person looks or acts a certain way that isn't considered 'normal'. Yet, every day when they go to school they see contradictions to the values that I try to teach them. They see kids being picked on because they're gay, because they're Muslim, or because they're poor. They see adults failing to help out, watching while these kids are bullied to the point where going to school is the most stressful thing in their lives. It's bad enough kids can't even go outside without worrying about pedophiles. They can't run around and play without worrying about some asshole in a car snatching them up off the street. School is supposed to be their safe haven, a place they can go where they know they're protected, but now those schools are becoming the most dangerous place of all.
I think all of us have had to deal with a bully at one point in time, some of us more than others. I know when I was growing up I was picked on constantly because I was not like everyone else. I dressed in thrift store clothing, even though my parents could afford better. I wore generic shoes, and was forced to have my hair cut in ways that were never stylish. My parents were strict, and it was because of that I became the target of everyone's teasing. I ignored it, but I cannot say that it didn't hurt. I was always self-conscious, and my self esteem was extremely low. Fortunately for me I had friends who understood what it was like, and we banded together to get each other through it. Some kids aren't that lucky, and today kids are absolutely heartless. I would have never thought of telling someone to kill themselves, or told someone the world would be better off without them. Who the hell thinks that's okay to say to someone?!?!
Anyway, I digress. What I'm curious about is, what do you guys think is the best way to deal with bullying? Should the police become involved? Should parents of bullied children be allowed to take legal action against the bully in hopes that by hitting the parents in the pocket they might put a stop to their kid's behavior? Truthfully, I believe that it should be a three strike rule. The first offense should result in suspension, the second expulsion, and the last strike should result in the child no longer being accepted in the public school system so that the parents need to either home school, enroll their kid in an online schooling program, or find a private school that does more about the situation that the public schools do. (They kind of have to considering they'll lose money if they don't correct the problem.)