The sudden feel of her body as she pulled him into her told Nicoli the answer to his unvoiced question. There were no words to describe what it did to his heart, the knowledge that she loved him as he loved her, needed him as he needed her, and would miss him as he would miss her. He hoped they would both be made stronger for the separation that lay so soon ahead, but now – now he wanted only to savor the time they had left.
She need not have requested only an hour, for he would have given her so much more, everything that was in his power to give.
Their love making this time was slow, though no less sensual. It was as if with each touch, each caress, each sigh, each kiss, he was saying goodbye. Which, he supposed, he was. This might be the last time he would be allowed to touch her, to hold her like this. The last time he could get drunk off her kisses or marvel at how well they fit together in spite of his deformity. He tried to tell himself he would make it back before the prophesied day, that there would be at least one more night together if not more, But Nicoli knew there was no guarantee of that and so he fully intended to draw this night out as long as possible. He tried to lose himself in the moment, to cherish her with all he had, and to leave her knowing the fullness of the love he bore her. If he could he would have made the moon stand still.
But like all things even lust must run its course, and when their time had passed Nicoli bundled them both once more in the blankets he had brought to escape the chill of the night. The passage of the stars told him there was still time before they had to leave in order to make it back to the palace before dawn, and he was in no hurry to return to the reality that said they must separate. So Nicoli lay with his arm about Anne's shoulders, her cheek resting on his chest and her body pressed against his, as his free hand traced odd shapes along her bare side.
Her name he realized. Her name and then his as if by entwining the letters together he could entwine their lives and ensure they would never have to part under such uncertainty again.
"I love you," he whispered, "So much, leaving is agony. But I will return. Sooner than expected if it is at all in my power to do so. Yours will be the first face I seek out. First with news of victory, and then with a determination to stay by your side as long as you would have me."
He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead and then, shrugging out of the blanket a little, raised his hand to the sky. "You see the moon? When it sits just beside that star there, we will have to leave. Until then the night is still ours."
They lay together until the moon reached the appointed position, Talking and dozing by turns. Whispered conversations carrying stories of court and dreams of "what if" interrupted by periods of long silence in which both slept peacefully in each other's arms, only for conversation to pick up when someone woke once more.
When the time came to leave Nicoli rose to dress and pack up, insuring that nothing was left behind before lifting Anne onto the horse and returning to the castle grounds. This time they slipped in unnoticed.
Safely inside the stable Nicoli said goodbye to his heart with a slow lingering kiss, for the moment they stepped out he would once again have to be nothing more than the Queen's knight.
By the time the sun rose he would be packed and ready for the journey ahead.
"Taking him down a peg or two will certainly be enjoyable," Lampkin agreed as he observed Dotty and soaked in her answer, "And if it is what you think is best, he will not hear the truth anytime soon from my lips." But as she spoke Dotty's words gave him a jolt.
She cares that I what?
Hold up my end of the bargain?
Or dare I hope she cares about me?
But he soon found himself alone in the hall, and though he knew she wanted her solitude, Lampkin couldn't help lingering against Dotty's door a moment after it closed. There was an unfamiliar ache in his breast, and for a moment he wondered what might had happened if he had been only a simple man.
"You know where my rooms are, if you need me," he murmured through the wood, and in that instant he wasn't thinking of the physical at all.
Another few minutes saw him slink silently through the palace halls, avoiding all notice, and into his own chambers where he stripped almost carelessly for bed. Yet he lay awake a long time before sleep finally claimed him.