Okay! Sorry, sorry, sorry everyone. I guess you've been waiting for me? Well, I'm here now. No gimmicks. Hello.
Yes the rumors are true. I don't think it's possible to literally describe what I am. To simplify it- I am a demon pest of an alternate dimension. (I like the pizza from this place you guys live at) I know what you must be thinking: Crazy evil demon with a body that doesn't make sense with spikes and tentacles. I'm probably carrying a sack of babies on my back while munching on the poopy drenched bowels of some slain virgin. I have a monocle and shoulder pads, goat legs and flaming ostrich wings. I have come to destroy the filthy humans of which I'm jealous of or hate for no reason, ultimately raping everyone and contorting a sensible reality into some kind of chaotic bloodbath/orgy full of new wave beats and naked presidents with...fish heads.
You couldn't be more wrong.