I understand what you're trying to say, but... overcoming mental illness is not the sort of thing that can be fixed with willpower or telling people to pull themselves out of their own problems. And I think that's precisely the problem with an "invisible" illness -- people not acknowledging the problem... because they don't see it as a problem. :/
Well I also like how he dismissed that me trying to get SSI or me on Foodstamps or me trying to get into housing living assistance, IS not me trying to help myself.
I'm not. Just saying you'll end up disappointed if you go in with the attitude of "They'll cure me and make it all better" as opposed to "Imma stack up on supplies and handle this shit on my own." But there are two points: the process is more important than the answer and — playing devil's advocate here — newly-diagnosed peeps will always resort to confirmation bias either way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
I'm not. Just saying you'll end up disappointed if you go in with the attitude of "They'll cure me and make it all better" as opposed to "Imma stack up on supplies and handle this shit on my own." But there are two points: the process is more important than the answer and — playing devil's advocate here — newly-diagnosed peeps will always resort to confirmation bias either way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
Therapy actually just helps me make realizations I otherwise wouldn't. It isn't a cure, just allows me to see more into the bigger picture. That's how I always took it.
But here's the thing; scientists of all kinds (in the medical field, in the psychological field, ect.) have found these problems because they had to have known the IS a problem. Along with this, we made it easier to recognize. We have medication that are made for ALL kinds for these problems, rather it be minor or major. So it is recognized.
Science trials and errors its way through things. Lobotomies and electrotherapy used to be acceptable methods of treating mental disorders all the way until the 1970's. Both are still sometimes used. If you're not sure what electrotherapy is, it's strapping someone in a chair and sending an electrical shock powerful enough to induce seizures. Side effects include, you know, spontaneous death.
As I said. Science is nowhere near done resolving this yet, and the scientific evidence that is available for the treatment of mental disorders is ambiguous at best. Medications used to treat these disorders can (and often do) include side effects as severe as suicidal tendencies, seizures, uncontrollable vomiting, violent mood swings, severe addictions, and the shutdown of vital organs. Being gay was considered a mental disorder until 1973 (ish), when it was removed from the DSM. The DSM still has an entry called "gender dysphoria" which basically describes transgendered individuals who are in distress about their physical identity not matching to their mental one.
If you live in the United States and you ask for assistance, you get nothing. There are sociopaths and the suicidally depressed in the US that go untreated every year. Veterans suffering from PTSD are more likely to end up homeless than actually receiving the help they need to survive.
Recognition means nothing if nobody does anything about it. It's why we have a public healthcare system. Our system is better than the American system. If one of us breaks a leg, does the fact that the leg is broken being recognized as an issue "fix" anything? No. Surgery fixes it. Time to rest and EI payments to help suffer through bills fixes it. Not having to pay 60,000+ for the surgery fixes it.
If I snapped tomorrow and stopped mentally functioning, it's the equivalent to breaking my leg. The difference between our cases is that the government won't help me with it.
"Life isn't fair" shouldn't be the argument to apply to human life and easily preventable suffering and deaths. You can't save everyone, but you have to at least fucking try. We owe it to each other to at least try. And it has to start with people on an individual level if there's any hope for change. And, hell, this is coming from me--the guy who ascribes his entire life's philosophy to logic and reason, to stoicism.
Now, when it comes to the majority of people in this society, most know other people have 'problems' (Rather it be physical, mental, psychological, etc.). Yet, they don't give a damn. Why? Because if it doesn't show and doesn't affect your life as a productive member of society, or someone in your immediate surroundings, people will not give a fuck. Why again? Because everyone has their own problems. We all have shit we have to deal with.
Bullshit. If people will spend nearly half a trillion dollars in a single year, voluntarily, on charity organizations, in the US alone? Then asking people to help isn't a futile effort. You just have to try, and keep trying, and keep fighting, until you succeed. Until the better, more humanitarian system wins. Until the system that spares needless suffering wins.
NOW This is how I view it. I am not saying I am right, as I am not saying you are wrong, but from my point of view, people KNOW it exists, but they don't care because it's not enough to disturb your life enough to be considered 'serious'.
People in the US are still scared of terrorist attacks, in spite of like, 99.99% of them likely never going to suffer one in their entire lives. So, again, bullshit. People fret and care over things they have no control over all the time, and which have no real influence in their lives. If people don't care about things that don't disturb their lives, they shouldn't give a damn about fiction as a whole then. Books don't disturb people's lives. Movies don't disturb people's lives. Video games don't disturb people's lives. Yet we'll all engage in, spend money on, and fight over the validity of these mediums all the time. People fight over sports teams and spend billions on them all the time, and demand their governments buy bigger stadiums for them. The news is constantly afoot of foreign politics, especially in the middle east, the EU, and Russia, where people seem overly concerned about these things.
I say like all the other bastards do; deal with it. And I don't say 'Let it take control of your life and make things harder.'
I'm saying 'Deal with it so it with the way you can, because in the end, you have to take the steps to denounce/recover/overcome this, and not people's duty to acknowledge and deal with it.'
When your mind does not function properly, you cannot simply "muscle through it." It is the equivalent to a mangled limb, you are not simply "walking away" when your leg is broken. You are not simply "lifting yourself up" when there's a two ton steel beam across your chest. You are not simply "getting up and going to work" when the thought of swerving into oncoming traffic is more powerful than the thought of coming home to your wife and kids.
The body is only as sharp as the mind controlling it. When the mind does not work properly, it will compel the body to destructive ends. Be it in the name of a brainwashing ideology, hatred, or a mental disorder, it's all the same in the end. The only difference being that you can treat a mental disorder. You can do something for people suffering from depression. You can't do anything for the other groups, but you can do something for the man who physically cannot function anymore.
If you still don't understand, then tell that to Kurt Kobain. Or Robin Williams. Tell that to anybody else who tried to just "muscle through it" and failed. I'm sure some people can survive with broken legs, treat it themselves, and get back up, so why can't everyone else? Life isn't fair, why should I pay for that 30-something year old mother's heart transplant with my tax dollars if she can't afford it? Fuck her kids: They can live without a mother, life isn't fair.
Therapy actually just helps me make realizations I otherwise wouldn't. It isn't a cure, just allows me to see more into the bigger picture. That's how I always took it.
I still hold my position, but I may not have explained myself very well. Regardless, it's best I leave this conversation.
I WILL REPEAT:
This is how I view the current subject. I am not saying you are wrong, not saying I am right. I am not saying someone else's point of view is stupid, flawed or incorrect.
I still hold my position, but I may not have explained myself very well. Regardless, it's best I leave this conversation.
I WILL REPEAT:
This is how I view the current subject. I am not saying you are wrong, not saying I am right. I am not saying someone else's point of view is stupid, flawed or incorrect.
I really enjoy romance in my roleplays; however, I do prefer to work up to it using suspense, tragedy, and mystery. The majority of my roleplays also dive into the libertine section, though I don't prefer this to be the main genre or focus.
I like your comment about the fact that if a man was physically injured, would someone tell him to get up and run? I think this is a good analogy for people that do not understand invisible illnesses - especially mental illness. People think that you can often just "snap out of" depression or anxiety, and that you just need to "change your thoughts". Like anything else, it isn't that easy. Even mental illness has a component of physical illness - there is something chemically, hormonally wrong in our brains that cause this. And certainly it isn't our fault.
I suffer from different invisible illnesses than what you described. First I suffer from non-epileptic seizures. Essentially this means that I have seizures but there is no short-circuit in my brain causing it. They are linked often to trauma and anxiety. Some people don't understand it and when I was younger they thought that I was faking it for attention or I had been drugged.
I also suffer from rather severe anxiety. This has been the hardest. It took me out of one job and makes it hard for me to get to work somedays. My mom often puts me down, asking me "how are you going to work full time if you can't even work an easy job?" It is really frustrating and I told her the same thing you said - about if I had cancer, or was physically ill, would you tell me the same thing? Of course she wouldn't, and I think talking about the illness, the thoughts, explaining what is going on with your body and brain is an important key. That being said you can't tell everyone what you are going through and what sort of illness you have. But those close to you should understand if you explain things to them. It is very hard to have an invisible illness. If only people could see the pain we have inside.
My mental health isn't really the best right now. Ever since I was 12, starting with my dad's death, I've been struggling with depression and internal anger and frustration because of the constant up and downs in my life, lack of stability, and continuously losing family members and people close to me. I'm very introverted, pretty socially awkward, get annoyed/pissed off easily to the point of crankiness and being bitchy/cruel, and I have trouble sticking to things. I don't play video games or watch anime as often as I used to and my eating habits have changed to the point of me losing weight but not by a lot. I also sleep a lot more and sometimes I'll even have suicidal thoughts (which I usually express through writing or listening to music) or very bad moods to the point where anything makes me cry or sets me off which is one main reason why I keep to myself.
I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the mental healthcare system sucks ass and so does most of society when it comes to mental health. Seriously can someone Falcon Punch some sense into people?
However there is something that a lot of people aren't mentioning. People who use mental illnesses as scapegoats/excuses. That pisses me off and makes me wanna punch them in the face. This is definitely something that needs to stop for a huge number of reasons.
Another thing I wanna mention is this: People deal with mental illnesses differently. What works for you WILL NOT work for someone else even if they're suffering from the same thing as you. People also show different symptoms than you.
That being said, THERE IS MORE THAN ONE WAY TO PORTRAY A MENTAL ILLNESS!! I'm gonna use this character as an example:
One of the main things I heard this character praised about was how people with mental illnesses (and the LGBT community) were able to relate to her and her theme song Let It Go. Hell I highly relate to her myself.
However I also heard many people say that Elsa is not good representation of mental illness just because they didn't find her relatable enough. That's idiotic to say because your way isn't everyone's way. Not everyone suffers like you or deals with things like you just because you have some things in common.
One of the main things I heard this character praised about was how people with mental illnesses (and the LGBT community) were able to relate to her and her theme song Let It Go. Hell I highly relate to her myself.
However I also heard many people say that Elsa is not good representation of mental illness just because they didn't find her relatable enough. That's idiotic to say because your way isn't everyone's way. Not everyone suffers like you or deals with things like you just because you have some things in common.
Elsa did not have a mental illness and she is not a representative for mental illness. Whoever came up with that dumb bullshit is got to be kidding themselves. Because Elsa just has that fun depression. The one that someone can let it go. I have known people who cannot just let it go.
Optimism and seeing the world in bubblegum wrappers, is not going to help someone with a disruptive disorder. I have a friend whose a schizophrenic. And I am technically also diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. I have my papers if I have to.
If I could just let go of the constant noise in my head I would. The best way I can describe the way my conditions affect me is a really slow, really loud, really crowded traffic jam. And I cannot just let that go. I cannot magically just change. It takes time. And I am a lot better than what I was, but that took me 4 years to do with hard work. Not some dumb fucking song, and suddenly I am better now guys.
Elsa did not have a mental illness and she is not a representative for mental illness. Whoever came up with that dumb bullshit is got to be kidding themselves. Because Elsa just has that fun depression. The one that someone can let it go. I have known people who cannot just let it go.
Yes I know she does not have one and isn't one but that's what happens when you have headcanons, theories, and fanfiction. Thanks fandoms.
But I have seen people (who mostly suffer from anxiety or depression) who highly relate to her on an emotional level (I'm one of them) and assholes who try to ruin that for them for whatever stupid reason. If someone relates to a character for whatever reason that happens to be emotional/mental, let them do that regardless of what you think. That was my overall point.
If the character is actually confirmed to have a mental illness that's the same as yours and you can't relate to her but other people can and you try to ruin it for them by thinking you can speak for all people who have that illness, that says more about someone than I need to know.
Your struggles don't speak every other person with a mental illness, even if that person has the same disorder than you. Like I said before, people have different symptoms and deal with things differently. What doesn't work for you may work for someone else and vice versa. Individuality should always come first and we can't treat everyone with mental illnesses the same because that would be patronizing and wrong.
PS: I'm saying you in a general sense here. Not actually talking about you.
Yes I know she does not have one and isn't one but that's what happens when you have headcanons, theories, and fanfiction. Thanks fandoms.
But I have seen people (who mostly suffer from anxiety or depression) who highly relate to her on an emotional level (I'm one of them) and assholes who try to ruin that for them for whatever stupid reason. If someone relates to a character for whatever reason that happens to be emotional/mental, let them do that regardless of what you think. That was my overall point.
Your struggles don't speak every other person with a mental illness, even if that person has the same disorder than you. Like I said before, people have different symptoms and deal with things differently. What doesn't work for you may work for someone else and vice versa. Individuality should always come first and we can't treat everyone with mental illnesses the same because that would be patronizing and wrong.
Yes, but then it dismisses those who do have problems. "All we need is more role models in the media, that will fix it" no we need services, we need assistance, and we need people to stop telling us to look through rose glasses and just be fucking happy and "let it go". Yeah, I am still using that.
I think the only character I have ever associated to the greatness battle of mental disorder, is probably Remus Lupin from Harry Potter. Whole relationship with the werewolves reminds me of how the world treats other cultures, and those with mental disorders. And the infliction itself reminded me of those I know are going through with their conditions.
Yes, I admit, not everyone is the same.
But the problem is because not everyone is in the same, there are those of us who fall into the cracks.
Elsa did not have a mental illness and she is not a representative for mental illness. Whoever came up with that dumb bullshit is got to be kidding themselves. Because Elsa just has that fun depression. The one that someone can let it go. I have known people who cannot just let it go.
On the one hand, yeah she doesn't have a mental disorder and I didn't see it that way. (Then again I think Frozen is just a shittier Mulan, but, this is not the thread for that.)
On the other hand, when you break down the story to its basic components, the conflict is "man vs society." It's, well, classic. It's at least as old as the concept of fiction. Many, many, many stories fall into "man vs society" and, frankly, if someone finds some personal correlation to the story as a result of a shared conflict, that doesn't make it invalid or wrong. If someone feels inspired, or takes notes on how to be a better person, or looks up to the achievements of a fictional character whose conflict is similar to their own in some way--even if it's just the most general, vague way possible--it's still valid. It's still fine, still good really.
Basically, yeah, Elsa doesn't have a mental illness, and if people think that's how it actually works, slap them upside the head and learn'em one, but don't assume malicious intent. If someone is trying to empathize with people who have mental disorders and just has the details wrong, they're an ally. An ally with good intentions who's just got the wrong idea. They're an ally who will probably listen to you if you don't bash what they like and instead focus on capitalizing on their empathy and connection to the story to teach them more about mental disorders.
If one person connects to Frozen because the conflict reminds them of mental disorders, and then they learn more about mental disorders, and become better at understanding and more sympathetic toward mental disorders... We win. Doesn't matter if the film is flawed or if the film has nothing to do with the subject matter, that's a victory.
If one person connects to Frozen because the conflict reminds them of mental disorders, and then they learn more about mental disorders, and become better at understanding and more sympathetic toward mental disorders... We win. Doesn't matter if the film is flawed or if the film has nothing to do with the subject matter, that's a victory.
And I can agree with that to a certain point. But then again it also is a double edge sword because some people will not learn further from that. And it turns the mental illness and invisible illness crowd back into the stone age. Because I am told to think positive thoughts. It's not that I don't think positive, I am simply rational and logical. So sorry it shatters your optimistic world view.
I am very bad at wording what I am trying to say right now.
Yes, but then it dismisses those who do have problems. "All we need is more role models in the media, that will fix it" no we need services, we need assistance, and we need people to stop telling us to look through rose glasses and just be fucking happy and "let it go". Yeah, I am still using that.
I think the only character I have ever associated to the greatness battle of mental disorder, is probably Remus Lupin from Harry Potter. Whole relationship with the werewolves reminds me of how the world treats other cultures, and those with mental disorders. And the infliction itself reminded me of those I know are going through with their conditions.
Yes, I admit, not everyone is the same.
But the problem is because not everyone is in the same, there are those of us who fall into the cracks.
Yeah I agree. Representation in the media doesn't do jack squat but make SJWs feel better about themselves. Healthcare and assistance on the other hand does. I can see how that would annoy someone but I've also had people say those things to me under the guise of "Don't give up. People do care." and etc. Intention does matter and would you rather have people telling you to kill yourself and surrender to your illness instead, letting it compress you until you can no longer breathe and not get help at all? I'd rather have optimism thank you. When I listen to Let It Go, the main message I get is to embrace myself and accept who I am instead of hiding and being fearful of it. Another main reason I relate to Elsa so much.
And you're free to do that. I'm not much of a Harry Potter fan anymore so I can't say anything.
If you're referring to the invisible illnesses, I can see what you mean. But like you said, that can be solved through services, assistance, and best of all education.
Yeah I agree. Representation in the media doesn't do jack squat but make SJWs feel better about themselves. Healthcare and assistance on the other hand does. I can see how that would annoy someone but I've also had people say those things to me under the guise of "Don't give up. People do care." and etc. Intention does matter and would you rather have people telling you to kill yourself and surrender to your illness instead, letting it compress you until you can no longer breathe? I'd rather have optimism thank you. When I listen to Let It Go, the main message I get is to embrace myself and accept who I am instead of hiding and being fearful of it. Another main reason I relate to Elsa so much.
You do not want to get on my views of suicide. I feel like those kind of comments dismiss the greater pain. I find if I talk to someone when I want to commit suicide. If I speak and find the root problem it works for me. And helps me. Mental wards and therapy can only do so much. I rather not get platitudes and sympathy. I want understanding and explanation. I want rational and logical thought. I want solutions not pat on the backs.
You do not want to get on my views of suicide. I feel like those kind of comments dismiss the greater pain. I find if I talk to someone when I want to commit suicide. If I speak and find the root problem it works for me. And helps me. Mental wards and therapy can only do so much. I rather not get platitudes and sympathy. I want understanding and explanation. I want rational and logical thought. I want solutions not pat on the backs.
It's not that simple and easy unfortunately. Mental Illness isn't a math problem that you can just solve and you can't get solutions and problems right away. If that were the case, I'd be a normal 21 year old but I'm not. I view therapy as a stepping stone and I think it should be used as one. Not a complete cure.
Dealing with things like this takes time, patience, and a lot of support which is where the whole sympathy, encouragement, and understanding comes in. If I didn't have my friends and family to support me, I probably wouldn't be here today.
Granted that most likely won't work for you but just saying nothing and approaching it like emotions don't matter (which is bullshit in most cases) isn't really gonna work either.
It's not that simple and easy unfortunately. Mental Illness isn't a math problem that you can just solve and you can't get solutions and problems right away. If that were the case, I'd be a normal 21 year old but I'm not. I view therapy as a stepping stone and I think it should be used as one. Not a complete cure.
Dealing with things like this takes time, patience, and a lot of support which is where the whole sympathy, encouragement, and understanding comes in. If I didn't have my friends and family to support me, I probably wouldn't be here today.
Granted that most likely won't work for you but just saying nothing and approaching it like emotions don't matter (which is bullshit in most cases) isn't really gonna work either.
Well I have no family support and I have consistently lived my life on the kindness of strangers. But I am also getting taken advantage of and manipulated too. Because of it as well.
Well I have no family support and I have consistently lived my life on the kindness of strangers. But I am also getting taken advantage of and manipulated too. Because of it as well.
Don't worry I know what that's like. Most of my family is deceased and I've cut off all the people who've tried to take advantage of me in the past so I'm left with my remaining family members and the friends I know I can trust.
The best advice I can give is be very selective about who you trust and watch out for the signs. Basically trust your instincts and don't allow anyone to use or manipulate you.
While it definitely may seem like the world is against you and hates you, that's not the case. You're not alone and there are individuals who care. You just have to find them and if they truly care about you, they'll support you any way they can and be there for you.
Ok, so since @Brovo mentioned my previous experience I should probably try explaining that first, just so people don't see me dive right into the thread and go "But wait. What history? What was he talking about? Explain!".
Pre-Warning: This may come off as a self bragging "Look at what I went through!" spiel. That's not the intention, I'm just trying to clarify what my experience and exposure to Autism was growing up.
I was diagnosed with Low Functioning Autism at 3-1/2 years old.
But since "Low Functioning" is rather vague I'll specify, habits and tendencies of mine included:
Immunity to Pain. I had cases of jumping off a slide, landing my head on concrete and just walking off. I've had a case of grinding my teeth to where nerves were exposed, and would proceed to chew on said exposed nerves until I got fillings. I had a case where I picked the inside of my cheek so much the entire inside of my mouth was exposed and rotting flesh.
I had a complete lack of understanding for consequence of physical actions. I would stare cars down on the road, having no clue that being hit by one could mean death. I had an idea that for some reason I was like Jesus and could walk on water. This led to me almost drowning, twice. One time I was under the water for about a minute before my Dad caught me.
I could not stand physical touch (or flash photography for that matter... That still annoys me). It took Mom at least a year of working up from light split second pokes to brief hugs to me being able to tolerate physical contact. Just imagine that one from the parents perspective, being unable to hold your kid because they completely flip out at the smallest amount of contact.
Eye contacting was practically non-existent. My eyes would wander to everything except other people. Someone talking to me? Nah, I'd rather watch the fan spin for 2 hours straight.
Associating other people as objects instead of people. Not in a "I don't care about people" sort of manner, just in a other people being people just didn't dawn on me. If I was in preschool and wanted to get to the block area but some kids were in my way. My first thought wasn't to move around them or ask them to move, my first thought was to just climb right over them.
Non-Verbal/Don't express myself. It wasn't until the time I started Kindergarten that I really started learning how to talk. And I although I did love my parents like any child does, I had no idea for the life of me how to express that. It led to one incident where Mom left me with my grandparents for a few days and hardly said goodbye assuming I didn't care. Ending up crying the next day when I woke up and saw she wasn't around. Fast forward ten years later when I tell her this story about how she ditched me she's completely shocked that I not only remembered that but actually cared about that.
Stimming, lots of stimming. Stimming can be a lot of different habits, every human being has some to relieve tension like say tapping a pen, Autism just takes those to an extreme. My most notable cases (that I remember) are blowing on myself, flicking my fingers in front of my nose, throwing my arms out in front of me repeatedly. (Fun Note: I didn't actually lose the desire to do these stims, I just built up a tolerance to resist it. So mentioning these stims and bringing them back to memory? That's suddenly kicking back a strong temptation for me to do them again that I'm having to resist).
Lack of Social Development. All the social skills children develop naturally growing up? Didn't happen for me. All that shit had to be taught in therapy. I had to be manually taught skills like expressing yourself, reading others emotions, considering other people, basic unwritten manners etc. In a sense therapy was very much an acting school in this sense. (Fun Note: Today, after the therapy this have fundamentally changed the way I approach things. Cause for most people the 'social' away to address topics is the only way they've ever known. I've spent a lot of my childhood without such instinctual knowledge, which has burned in me a separate perspective to keep in mind. Which honestly speaking I find useful not allowing myself to easily jump on fear or paranoia wagons that other people do so by instinct).
So you get a basic idea of what my early childhood with Autism was like. Which leads us to the following 12 years of my childhood, the therapy. See, I was diagnosed back in 1997 when Autism wasn't that well known. For the first few months after I was diagnosed my Mom was in a mad dash trying to find 'something' to do about the Autism, and all the doctors told her 'Sign him up for a home. There's no chance of getting better'. But eventually she tracked down a study in Autism Therapy that was showing some sign of working. The problem? It was being done in a single University in the United States.
I'm not sure on the specifics of the arrangement that went down, but basically she got in touch in them and managed to get them to help her understand the technique and have her set up a similar program for me in Canada. For those wondering the program in the United States was called IBI (Intensive Behavioural Intervention) which got renamed to ABA (Applied Behavioural Analysis) when making the switch to Canada. To cut a long complicated story short (cause this thread isn't about me any ways. I ain't even ranting, I'm just giving some context) she had to run that therapy from the ground up by hiring and training her own team therapists. And somewhere down the line she helped create (or simply make relevant, not sure which) ASO (Autism Society Ontario) which then also lead to more therapy, as well as me getting exposed to a lot of other autistic children. Some of whom I'm still in contact with to this day.
Note: Last time I heard, ABA has the 50/50 success rate. But note that's factoring in both families who invest full time into the therapy (done 24/7, one parent quits their job to support it etc.) and those who only go into it part time and/or use it as a "Drop off and pick up" sort of deal. The former obviously having much better success than the latter. But also remember that even in the 50% that fails, it's not an all or nothing deal, progress is still made. And additionally please don't instantly get mad at the 50 who didn't go full time. I was born in a relatively wealthy family, was the only one in my household with a disability and ABA still put us in the Red a few times. Autism Therapy is so expensive that it's simply not economically possible for a number of families, especially those who are already juggling other issues.
Fast forward 12 years of that, and that was when I was deemed well enough that therapy was no longer needed (primarily judged by the fact I was able to make a whole group of friends in High School without any involvement of my Parents or Therapist).
Now, during those 12 years though there were two other big points of relevance.
ASO Fundraising. It didn't just exposed me to more therapy, in order to remain relevant and be able to help other families they also ran a lot of awareness events and fundraisers. That got me a good amount of volunteering experience within the Autism community while I was still in therapy myself. But not afterwards due to some new executive taking charge in that time who ran the organization to the ground.
Ontario's Dalton McGuinty case. This was a lawsuit that started happening when I was in Grade 3. Basically what happened was Dalton McGuinty when running for the Ontario Election promised to increase government spending (which was practically non-existent) for Autism Therapy. He got elected, and like most politicians he never held his promise. This resulted in a court case that lasted a few years and spanned two different levels of courts. I ended up briefly involved in the first level, being the only child to speak to the judge in a sort of personal testimony of how effective the therapy was, and why it was worth funding. The families going to court against McGuinty ended up passing the first level of court, but then got denied in the second level.
Fun Note on the #2 bit, one of the cases McGuinty used to claim it wasn't needed was the testimony of Autistic people who never went through therapy, and were associating therapy as some sort of correctional facility that was no different than trying to change someone's eye or skin colour. I bring this up because it's going to be relevant once I'm past this history bit and addressing the thread itself.
So there were those cases during my therapy, but that wasn't quite where my experience in Autism ended either. After a year of basically enjoying high school like everyone else electives at school began to open up. And our school was very shitty with electives which left me with two options.
Fill it up with pointless classes I have no interest in
Take up a Co-Op Placement
I chose to late the latter, but the question was where? At the time I was pursuing game development with what electives were left, but I figured it'd be wise to expand my reach to more than one potential field. So I went to a Autism Therapy Centre. Not just any one though, I went to the one that my old Lead Therapist had went on to open during my final years of therapy. So awkwardly enough, I was employed by two people who knew me since I was a child, and was a co-worker with others who knew me since I was a child (and apparently I was the only one not to get nervous whenever the heads of the centre would come to check in on things). So that was... interesting. XD
Note I wasn't working at the same level as everyone else (cause you know, lack of college education and stuff), so I was worked as an assistant in the therapy process. This ended up consisting up the majority of my Grade 11 Classes, when then went into part time Summer work, and them part time Grade 12 work, and then full time Summer work. But after Grade 12 school was done, I had a post-secondary education to consider. By this point I decided video game design wasn't for me (at the time, I'm debating giving it a second shot) which left me with Autism Therapy. So asking those at the Centre for help I was advised to sign up for ECE (Early Childhood Education).
ECE by the way has NOTHING to do with Autism Therapy. They claim to be proficient with all mental health issues, but I'd argue they're not even capable of working with typical children, but that's a topic for another thread. Basically the reason was two fold:
You can't help Autistic Children get better if you don't know what that 'better' even is.
The Autism Studies program requires a pre-requisite program of being trained with children any ways.
So, that's a program I then went off to spend the next several years of my life getting involved in. Do to complications of placements I ended up getting 4 instead of the usual 3, and 3 of those four placements all ended up having a child with Autism (all of whom sharing the same name funny enough. Which a child I worked with back at the Autism centre ALSO had. Small world huh? I'd say the name but I'm risking breaking four different privacy agreements doing that).
After that program? Admittedly my passion for working with young children got drained for a list of reasons (not relevant to this thread though), which has resulted in me not getting that involved in the education or Autism field since save for the occasional thread about it and such, so I've spent the last year now out of the loop on education in general and the past 4 years out of the loop out of Autism specifically (save for the Autistic children at the placements).
TL;DR I've been out of Autism (mostly) for 4 years now, and fully for a single year. But for the 18 years before that I spent it with Autism, getting therapy for Autism, volunteering for Autism events and working in Autism Therapy.
Disclaimer for those who skip the history: Although I do like to think I have an extensive history with Autism, I have been out of it for a few years. And at no point have I actually been professionally trained in the topic, so please keep this in mind.
There's still a lot of ignorance when it comes to knowledge of Mental Health in general. Just try to remember that the people speaking like this are (for the most part) speaking from ignorance.
Sometimes I can catch my behavior and take a seat back. Sometimes I react, rather than think about something. And I don't know all of my triggers for meltdowns or triggers for when I am going to behave in a certain way. I know some of them.
Try keeping a notepad near you, and whenever you react or have the temptation to react try writing it down. Detail what the tempted reaction is, where it was, when it was etc. This could help do two different things for you.
Overtime you'll be able to look at the notes and notice patterns which can help point to triggers that you might have otherwise missed
It gives you a distraction to help deter you away from having a reaction in the first place
That there's this stigma that anyone can just fake an invisible disorder. But if people were seriously educated on certain disorders. Those symptoms are very hard to fake. And these disorders really do disrupt our daily lives. And it's even more disruptive when people just think you magically can change overnight.
That's part of the issue though, to the uneducated eye these things ARE easy to fake.
Someone who understands _____ Mental Illness will be able to spot someone whose faking clear as day. To someone whose never heard about it though? Heard in passing? Or uses stuff like Tumblr as their news source? It's really easy to give off almost any behaviour and pass it as something else. Which is only aided by the "If you don't believe me, you're an insensitive ass hole!" card. Humans are social creatures, they don't respond well to guilt or peer pressure, and they are also likely to believe information that makes sense to them even if they haven't looked into it themselves.
Not defending this by the way, but like Brovo said earlier it's important to understand it if you wish to deal with it.
In all seriousness though, this is a pretty bad thing to have happen but it's makes sense as to why it does giving how awareness of such things are recent.
Like, so recent people in our own generation, the millennial's meant to be pushing things forward don't even understand it that well yet unless if we or someone we know is affected by it.
I am working on getting SSI which is a horribly slow system. That technically is even worse for those with invisible disorders. Because it's system that treats people like they are liars. It's a system created by those who do not know what these disorders really are and believe in this hype that people who go through the SSI system are lying people who want to cheat and be lazy and not earn their money or don't want to work. No one wants to be degraded. No one wants to be belittled and this system in the end of the day is exhausting. And it's harmful for the mental health of anyone with a disability.
But you've been diagnosed by a doctor right? There isn't that much they can do to stop you considering that.
At least that's the case in Canada, I'm not sure how where you live differs.
Ultimately it's something we need more public awareness on, because currently a lot of people aren't that aware of a number of these issues. Sympathetic maybe, but not understanding. That and more study and funding for therapy is also needed, we got so many people falling through the cracks not just because of public opinion, but because the current services either aren't working for some people or are too expensive for people to use.
There's a big wall in our way. Something that was already mentioned in this thread earlier. There are people who look at mental illness and go "Toughen up and get over it! We all suffer too!". Which is a really ignorant viewpoint for someone to be having, but I get why such viewpoints exist too. A lot of people are dealing with a lot of issues these days, recovering from the recession, high college bills, Americans have lack of health care, other countries may have exceptions to it (ex: Canada doesn't cover dental care), a lot of people are making minimum wage which isn't enough to support themselves.
A lot of people have stuff thrown on their plates that makes life pretty difficult, and as a result they're too occupied to bother worrying about other people because they're worried about making sure they and who they live with have enough to survive. I think everyone would love to be able to come out and say "Let's all help Mental Illness!", but human nature just won't allow people to do that when they themselves are in the red. So as much awareness as we may spread, it's only going to reach people who are either already either, personally effected, those living comfortably enough to have the time to listen or those who just have a heart of gold.
Everyone else? You're not going to reach them until society has a whole get's a massive reform. Sorry if I just made this a bit political, but I do feel like this is a big reason as to why Mental Illness is viewed the way it is that isn't often brought up.
I'd say yes. But... I think we also need to decide on what those views should be.
Cause currently I see several 'views' of disorders being pushed on society.
To better accept and understanding disorders among people. Give them the help they need, not treat them like monsters.
That these people are lazy and need to stop complaining.
That there's absolutely nothing wrong with having ________ and both of the above opinions should just give it a rest.
Now, #3 is my main concern. #2 I expect to die out with time, but #3 runs a big issue of being an opponent for a while. These are people who either got diagnosed as an adult, or were diagnosed as a kid but simply never got help. But instead of wanting help, or working towards improving themselves they've taken the stance of "There's nothing wrong with it! Everyone should just accept it end of story!".
And for those skipped my history spoiler and are thinking "Gwazi, Tumblr isn't a danger", that's not what I'm talking about.
To re-cap, back in 2002-2003 when I was in Grade 3 I got involved in a court case involving Autism Therapy funding for the province. That's great right? We should expect just about everyone affected by Autism to get behind this program! That... wasn't the case. On the Government sides were a community of Autistic people, having grown up without therapy and were high enough functioning to submits arguments to court (I don't think any ever entered the courtroom themselves) but were still reliant on others to take care of them, some were still wearing diapers.
And the basic argument they made court ran along the lines of "To have therapy for Autism is the same as sending someone to a correctional facility for the colour of their Skin! (LGBT wasn't as big an issue yet) It is impeding on who we are and changing us at our core! It is telling us we are not wanted in society, and have to change to appease everyone else!". Now, thankfully that wasn't enough to have them win the first level of the court, but it still made it into court! Before the whole SJ movement on the Internet had any traction... So mentalities like this are a danger. From now on I'll call this group "Purity" to make things easy to follow.
Now, as we push forward with trying to get more people to sympathize with Mental Illness, understand people, not judge them. Those are all great, and we definitely need to be moving in this direction. But it's a double edged sword, because as we push the door of acceptance larger and larger and we also give even more room for Purity to convince people that all these therapies, drugs etc are discriminatory and just as damaging as ignoring them. To the uneducated mind, it could easily be painted as "All they need is our help and compassion" scenario, and with how willing people are to believe in conspiracy theories like depression medications covering up deaths? Or vaccines causing Autism? There's a big crowd that Purity can easily catch on to if we're not careful with educating people at the same time as spreading awareness.
And this can get's a little more muddy when you realize, stuff like ABA as great as the therapy is, it's still experimental, and ran by human beings prone to mistakes. Especially when said humans are filled with fear and panic (such as parents scared for their child's future). This can and has lead to cases of therapists and parents obsessing over complete non-issues just because the cause of it was Autism. The biggest example I can think of? Asexuality. It is rather common for Asexuality to happen alongside Autism, and anyone where who supports the LGBT community is probably thinking "Ok, I fail to see the problem".
But for a second try to enter the perspective of the parent, you were told your child would never have a life, they'd be reliant on a home. You love your child more than anything, what you want to see more than anything is for your child to succeed in life and become independent. So you go into therapy, you dedicate entire years of your life towards it. Tackling stims, teaching social skills left and right in an attempt for your child to have the skills needed to be able to take part in society without any difficulty. Now, one thing to note about Autism is that it has a habit of fighting you, hard. When you do therapy you will often enter a cycle of fixing one issue and then all the sudden two new ones pop up. You are a fighting a seemingly endless battle to help your child, the person you would give up everything for. And then one day, you learn Autism may prevent your child from ever having or desiring a partner.
Now, for most of us looking at this from the outside the answer is obvious. If he's Asexual that's fine, accept it and worry about something actually damaging. But fighting Autism for that long as a Parent? It's not something your brain handles easily. You get stressed, you get frantic, you developed a reflex for fighting Autism. Many parents, and therapists may not even have the time to think about it before going "Nope! That's Autism! Get rid of it!".
And 'this' is a danger, not just because of the obvious ramifications it can have on a child's self esteem (something the LGBT community knows well about) but it also opens a window to the Purity group I mentioned before to barge right in and go "You see what this stuff is doing to these children!? Discrimination!" and suddenly, they have a much more solid and legitimate case on their hands.
Ok, I might have dragged this off topic for a bit, so to bring it back to the original point?
We definitely need the views of Mental Illness to change, current society perspectives it cause way to many people to suffer and in some cases die due to pure ignorance. But we need to be careful not to just spread awareness but to also properly educate people on it. Otherwise we risk public momentum taking that awareness in the completely wrong direction. And on top of that, we should always be working to improved and fix flaws in our current therapies and medications, both because like medical care that should be expected but also because that way we run less risk of people finding something to pick at and stand in the way of actually helping people who need it.
Edit: So many grammar issues from typing in the middle of night... So many... Not sure if I should even try fixing them all. O_O
