Heaven's Nova

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In the dark she held him, she held him like she wouldn't ever let go, and in a way it was true for her heart held on to his. The hold wasn't possessive, or needy, it just did. Almeria held Tra in the dark of their quarters on the Saint allowing their crew to take care of the ship, and them.

They were but a few hours from home base, though no one home knew they were coming. The Saint had maintained radio silence after racing off the sister base, which was up in arms. It took little time for new to spread, their security had been compromised, the Church had infiltrated them. What many did not knw was that he head of the Church had been sitting in one of their meeting rooms.

Almeria's orders had be clear, her first priority was getting her own crew out of the line of fire, for as soon as the news broke out chaos would reign. It was a sad fact. That it took not only three crew members to carry Tra, for the sake of speed, but Almeria was in little condition to run either.

Their first destination was no destination at all. Almeria told her crew to fly off in any direction and get the Saint lost. She wanted time to think and make decisions and she was quickly having a hard time doing either. And so the crew of the Saint did just that as their captain was all but falling asleep before they carried her off her chair and into her quarters where Tra was already resting.

But it became evident soon once she awoke that they would need to go home, and that some rats needed to be driven out of the nest. So even though physically Tra was still exhausted and Almeria would only keep her own council in her own well being, they set a course back to base. It had been almost five days since Namir killed Tra. It was time to see who expected them home.
 
He did not wish to sleep, not at first. The trauma he had been through whispered fears of death in his ears, made him fear the weakness, the need to rest. The uplifting feelings had sustained him through his first few hours of life, but after that, fear clawed at him like a ravenous animal. It took time to master, and the first few times sleep claimed him, he woke breathless and sweat covered from dreams of death and entropy.

Finally, he slept. It was not restful for the first day. The pain saw to it that he woke every few moments. There was nothing that could be done. His insides had been frozen, his body locked in death. Then, somehow, Almeria had brought him back. He didn't know how, but he had felt the connection. But now, every muscle ached as though burned from the inside. He could not find comfort. By the second day, he was too exhausted to remain awake, no matter how his body pained him, and he slept through til the fourth day, only rising to take care of necessary things. He drank little, ate less, for his throat hurt him. He did not speak for this very reason. The worst part was the light. He found that his head and eyes screamed with pain anytime there was more than the smallest amount of light, and when the false sunrise started the first morning, he cried in pain until someone came in to check on him and turn it off.

He allowed Almeria to hold him, needing it almost as much as she did. He was finally awake, and the pain had lessened over the days, though her touch was still the only thing in the world that didn't hurt. In fact, though he'd flinched away at first, he soon found that the embrace of his beloved soothed his pain. He wanted to tell her what had happened. His throat was finally not feeling raw, but it was exceptionally dry and he felt he needed food as much as water.

"Almeria, love," he managed in a crackling voice. "I'd very much like something to eat and to drink. And then, I'd very much like to tell you what happened. I'd also like to know what happened to Namir." He had no hope that the Overcleric was dead; Gohdem would not have told him the secrets to the man's downfall if Namir was dead, would He?
 
Leaning up, Almeria touched his face, glad to hear his voice, though he sounded very worn out still. Over the course of the last several days she had tried to make sure Tra had every comfort and when she needed to be away, she had had Ian or one of the others stay in her quarters until she returned unless he needed anything. There was no worry that something would go wrong, but rather she wanted people to be near for him should he awake alone.

"I will bring you some water and some soup." Almeria gave his a gentle kiss before getting out of bed and on silent feet heading out. She did not dawdle when she went to the mess and her crew was still kind in enduldging her need to be with Tra most of the time. She had no notion that she still looked exhausted, which helped keep people from anything more then nessisary conversation with her.

When she returned Almeria paused at the bedroom door. "Tra, how much light do you want?" she wanted him comfortable, but she also wanted to be able to see the food, she brought more then just food for him.
 
He'd nearly drifted back to sleep by the time she returned, but as she spoke, he tried to push himself up into a seated posture. It was difficult, but he managed, sweat breaking out over his body.

"Predawn level shouldn't hurt me. If you need to turn it up a bit more, I probably need to get used to light again, as it is." His voice, rough and worn, nonetheless held humor. "Though I would appreciate a few pillows to lean on. I fear I am not quite myself." He realized he needed to see her, to know she was truly safe. He hadn't seen her in the light since he'd collapsed against her, and at that point, much of the world had been an overly bright blur.

His hands fussed with the bedspread. He could feel every bit of the stitching. It was interesting. The pain had not given way to numbness, not yet. He knew it would, but for now, everything was so very real, so very coarse.

"Almeria.. I have to know. Did he hurt you?"
 
Almeria set the lights, starting at predawn, but with it gradually building up to half illumination within an hour. As she walked in with the tray, setting it down on the bed stand so she could gather up pillows for him, she smiled. Seeing him awake and talking, it was encouraging, though every day was an improvement. He had not just been dead, but his life had been taken from him violently, he needed time, and Almeria aimed to make the process as comfortable as she possibly could.

Once the pillows were helping Tra sit up, Almeria scooted around so that she was facing him and he could see her while she spoke. She was a horrible liar after all so he would know the truth as she spoke. "Namir never had a chance to touch me, but," she took one of his hand and brought it up to her cheek. There was the pain, the ghost of the terror and the hurt in her eyes, "what he did, he couldn't have hurt me more," but she smiled, because she was looking at him and in the end her joy outweighed everything else.

Leaning over she kissed Tra for a long lingering moment, holding back so much as she kept it light and gentle. She then moved, bringing the food tray over so he could eat. "Namir, he did not escape unscaved, though how many shots I got in or how great the wounds I can not tell you. I was not very focused." At this she admitted with a slight hint of shame.
 
Tra reveled in the kiss, letting it heal the fear that he had clung to. She was safe. She was alright. He hadn't hurt her. And he wouldn't; Tra would see to that. His hands lifted and brushed over her cheeks, through her hair. All too soon, the kiss was over. This, however, was a blessing in disguise, as the priest's stomach complained loudly that he needed to eat.

He was not surprised that she'd shot at Namir, and as he lifted a bite to his mouth, he worried about what he would have to tell her. But not yet. Right now, it was difficult enough to merely eat, and he found himself weakening after a few bites. Weakness was not a sensation the priest was used to, and he resolved to finish the meal on his own. It was a struggle to finish. Yet when Almeria offered to help him, he stubbornly insisted that he had to do this on his own. By the time the meal was done, he was resting back on the pillows, trying to recover from such a simple act. He felt so helpless. How was he to defeat Namir like this? Yet Gohdem had talked as if he had more than a chance, so he would trust in his deity.

Tra sat straight up, nearly toppling the dishes. Gohdem had spoken to him! This hadn't really sunken in before, but now, with a full stomach and quenched thirst and the small relief from pain that the meds he'd taken with his meal gave him, he realized what had happened. His deity had talked to him, not simply given him a vision, but spoken to him in a place they both were, when Tra's spirit had been momentarily freed from mortal bonds. He would have to tell Almeria, he knew. He hoped she would understand.

His expression was serious as he turned to look at her, making sure he had her full attention before speaking.

"Gohdem spoke to me, Almeria. He explained. He explained so much. It was amazing. The most wondrous experience. And the most terrible. I realize now that I had to die to have such an experience."
 
Almeria ate very little, as she was concerned with how Tra was doing with his meal. That he didn't want her help caused her to be glad he was feeling strong enough to do it alone, and yet she felt she should be helping in some way. Yet all she could do was watch. When he finished and was resting once more she was impressed, his stamina was returning, he might have been tired, but he was still awake and the lights were brighter then they had been in days and he had not felt the need to complain about them.

When he straightened she worried that something was wrong, but while he had a serious expression on his face Tra did not look to be in worse pain. She removed the tray and looked over at her lover, knowing he would speak when he was ready, when he could. As he turned to her, she reached over, absently putting her hand on his chest where the charm hung.

What Tra had to say took a moment for Almeria to comprehend. Not because the words were oh so strange or complex, but the simple truth was almost more miraculous then anything else that had happen on recent months. "You were with him?" she asked in a soft sad voice. Tra had been with the creator, with Creation, and she had dragged him away. At the time Almeria had been working purely on instincts and emotions, there had been little thought involved when she had brought Tra back, but now the implication of her selfishness hit her. She had taken Tra away from their god, from perfect peace, and she felt guilty for doing so.
 
Tra nodded slowly, his hand covering hers. He misunderstood, perhaps on purpose, thinking her sad because of the memories of his death. With a groan, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her onto his lap. He pressed his lips to her hair, speaking softly.

"I cannot imagine what pain you felt to see me... I'm so sorry. I wish you hadn't had to. But now, I am back where I belong. Back with you." He did not wish to relinquish his embrace, but he was weakening again. Slowly, he let go of her and closed his eyes, tipping his head back on the pillows, now shoulderlength hair framing his face like an unruly lion's mane. "Gohdem told me things that will help us defeat Namir. Nothing so concrete as maps or codes, but He did explain what my visions meant.

"Namir seeks to control you. For he is powerless, and you hold the power he needs. The power to cause death. Entropy." He took a long breath, coughing for several minutes before waving off any help and continuing. "You are destruction to creation. We, together, are balance. For without entropy and without energy, life cannot move forward. When wielded together, the two swords from the vision create life, evolution, change, and hope. They are we two, Almeria. Without change, a tree cannot bloom. Without energy, it cannot grow. For some reason or another, the two of us were meant to be together. We are Gohdem's Blades, the force of His creation in this world. And if we can learn to control our power, to live as one, we can defeat Namir. We can make him powerless."
 
Almeria was surprised as Tra gathered her onto his lap and held her there. His action echoed his words. He was happy where he was, and that he did not regret what she did. As the exhaustion took him and his hands slid away, Almeria put her own arms around him, leaning her head upon his shoulder, brushing a brief kiss upon his cheek.

Then Tra began to speak again, and what he told her was shocking. It was his coughing fit that quickly brought her out of her stunned expression, and he waved her off from trying to move to make it easier for him she placed her hand on his chest again, where the charm laid. As much as she wanted to comfort Tra, Almeria needed comfort herself.

When he continued, Almeria could only feel awe. Quiet for several long seconds she finally spoke. "I don't even know what to think right now," she admitted, feeling breathless for some reason. "This is a lot to sink in." Almeria moved her hand away and rubbed both eyes, feeling tears welling up which she did not wish to spill. She wasn't sad, just overwhelmed. "I.... I suppose you truly are my other half," she whispered as she touched his cheek, trying to smile despite the malstorm that was now coursing through her being. Almeria then kissed him, because she could no longer hold back.
 
Tra returned the kiss, deepening it slightly. By the time the kiss ended, he was breathless and his mind was catching up to what had been said. He shoved all thoughts but thoughts of caring for her out of his mind, holding her and caressing her hair slowly. He held her for a long while, til he drifted off to sleep for a moment.

When he woke, it was with a grumble of pain. At least he wasn't hungry this time. He did, however, feel in desperate need of a shower. And prayer. He wanted to get his life back in order. Slowly, he scooted out from under Almeria and the covers, wincing at how much it hurt to move, to walk. He felt weak and quickly came to the conclusion that he'd lost some muscle tone. Well, that was another thing to work on. He'd do his exercises as soon as he had a moment. For now, however...

"I'm going to take a quick shower. I feel I really need it."
 
"Are you going to shave?" Almeria didn't mind the scruffiness, but she wondered if he was going to want to grow a beard after having his hair cut short. That might have been too many changes in a short period of time, not counting the more important things that caused the cosmetic changes.

While she was not in a hurry to have Tra leave her side, she knew she would have had to soon herself. There were things that needed to be done before they reached base. Sitting up she looked at Tra, smiling despite herself. Seeing him up was a relief. "Do you want me to wait until you're out before I head to the bridge?" she didn't want to leave him alone in their quarters unless he felt confident that he would be alright. Time was at her command right now after all, they wouldn't set to land in the base until she informed the crew to do so.

Reaching over she picked up her small handheld computer. Course information as well as any messages from her crew would be on there. She was grateful for Naidin and the others for coming together and being so amazing.
 
He chuckled, nodding at her question about shaving. "I somehow think that shaving is necessary right now." He turned on the bathroom lights, wincing at the brightness and looking at himself in the mirror. His hair. How hadn't he noticed it? Most of it was gone and the priest wore a shocked expression at the ragged, shoulderblade length hair he had left. "Perhaps very necessary. I hardly recognize myself."

He picked up the shaver and started to quickly remove the scruffiness, leaning heavily on the sink while doing so. "You can go ahead and go, I will be fine. I've enough strength to get through a shower." Satisfied that his face was once again cleanly shaven, he gave her a weary smile before shutting the door and climbing into the shower.

Tra realized after about one minute that he had overestimated his strength. He pushed on, managing to get clean, but it was exhausting and he had just enough strength to wrap a towel around his waist and flop forward onto the bed when he was done. Momentarily, he was able to roll over and pull the covers up. Thinking he would fall right asleep, he closed his eyes. Sleep, however, refused to come and instead his mind was filled with thoughts and emotions, the upcoming battle with Namir among them. However, most of the thoughts, the feelings revolved around Almeria and a phrase she'd uttered.

...my other half.

Tra sighed, trying to forget the thrill those words had sent through his tired, aching body, to ignore the fear that it brought forth. A world of possibilities he hadn't considered ran rampant through his mind, expanding ever onward. Once this was all said and done, where would they be? There'd be no need to stay with the pirates, and he was certain the others would understand that the two might wish to move on, to find a place to be, to love and grow old together. But... she loved him and he knew that, but did she love him that much? Enough to become his beloved for the rest of their lives. He didn't know. The thought that she might say no, should he ask, worried him greatly. Yet as great as the worry was, the thought of her left it insubstantial, like morning mist, easily wafted away. He knew, even if she didn't say yes, she'd stay with him. That was the important part.
 
Satisfied that Tra was going to be fine alone, Almeria headed to the bridge. Feeling like she hadn't been up there nearly enough, she made sure to talk to each crew member currently on duty. The advantage of a small crew was being able to talk to everyone personally. She knew their ETA, she had a general idea of the "noise" they'd picked up from various pirate signals and thus the general atmospear she would be entering. The ball wa in her court and she knew it. All that remained was getting there.

While she had been lack in keeping up the image of a captain while with her crew she knew that once on base she had better look the part. Absently Almeria handled the data stick she would be taking to show the other captains as she walked back to her quarters. As she entered she sighed, she knew when she exited the room again she would be on the go for a very ling time. She wasn't sure she was ready for all of this, but it had to be done. "Tra, are you still awake?" she asked softly, not wanting to wake him if he was asleep.
 
Tra nodded, smiling though his eyes remained closed. The lights were still up enough that she'd be able to see the nod. He felt exhausted, and now that his thoughts had run their course, it was hard for the priest to stay awake.

"I'm awake. Just thinking. How long til we dock? I would rather stay awake til I am home if we are close." Even if they were close, it would be a difficult task. The priest's color was poor again; obviously, he'd been over exerting himself. Still, he needed to stay awake. There were things he had to do. His thoughts went to his talk with Gohdem, how he hadn't had a moment to utter more than a quick prayer. He wanted, he needed to be at his altar. Suddenly, he couldn't wait and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Standing, he pulled on a pair of pants and started to walk to the small altar he'd set up in the corner of their quarters. He literally fell to his knees, a painful shock that caused him to utter a soft grunt.

"I'll be fine," he spoke. He needed to do this.
 
"We're not far now, but, well there's no need to stay awake." When he got up she frowned, and she was all by his side when he went down to his knees at the alter. It was only his assurance that he was fine that kept her from reaching out. Still though she worried, she couldn't help but worry, but she had things she had to do, so she withdrew, but she kept her ears and eyes open just in case as she started to pull out fresh cloths and brush her hair.

Almeria also didn't want anyone to see Tra back on base. Not in his condition, at least not until she had all the captains trapped in the meeting with her. He wouldn't like it, but she was going to assign two of the Saint's crew members to stick with him in the short term. If she could she would have him come to the meeting, but he wasn't up for it and besides what she planned to do there she did not want him to see. She didn't want to see it for that matter, but it was nessisary. Almeria paused at the bathroom door. She wondered though how long she should keep him hidden. It would be impossible to keep him hidden for long, but she hoped it would be long enough.
 
Tra felt himself calm and relax as he prayed. By the time he finished, he felt somewhat revitalized and was able to rise to his feet more easily than he had been before. He turned to frown at Almeria. She looked concerned and the priest wanted to know why. First, he put out the candles on the altar and said one last short prayer, a prayer for Almeria's endurance. He had no idea how long she'd been awake, but he would wager that it had been far too long and often.

"Love, something's bothering you. What is it?" He made his way over to her, taking the brush shakily from her and beginning to brush her hair. It was soothing to brush long hair, and though it reminded him acutely just how short his own was now, it was nice to be able to do something for her and play with those curls all at once. He leaned down, kissing her ear gently before speaking softly. "I love you, Almeria. Please... what is wrong?"
 
It was a strange comfort as Tra began to brush her hair, though she had been a bit surprised when he took the brush. She closed her eyes trying to put things in order in her head before she felt his breath by her ear. She opened her eyes and looked at him. "And I love you, which seems to be the problem," she smiled at him though, indicating what was to come next had little to do with wanting to love him any less.

Taking his free hand in both of hers she looked up into his eyes. It was nice to be able to see them again. If she could she would have stood there like that with him all day, but she couldn't. "There will have already been a meeting of the captains called, word will have leaked out about the asteroid base. There will be I doubt much solid facts, just rumors and speculation. We have not contacted base and we won't until we are ready to land. I don't want any of them knowing we are coming and I don't want them to know anything until I've told them. Someone set us up Tra. Someone tried to deliver me to Namir on a sliver platter and I wouldn't be surprised if your own surivial.... Surprise might be my only advantage, and ... Tra I need to keep you safe." Until the end Almeria had been very business like, trying to focus on what she had planned, but the end was a plead. She had lost him once and she knew she cold not take it a second time. A second time that would be permenate.
 
He frowned, listening as her voice became more and more insistent. He did not wish to let her go alone, yet he knew that his being there was a liability that might put her in more danger than anything. Still... Still he wanted to be there, to keep her safe, protect her.

"Almeria, I.. What I... don't...I mean..." He stumbled over words, trying to find the right ones. He didn't wish to be apart from her, but he wished to do what was best, but he wanted to keep her in his arms and safe, yet he knew they would both have to fight again. He'd never felt himself at such a loss for words before, and blamed his weakness for the confusion. In the end, the words he spoke were not at all the ones he'd expected to hear himself utter.

"Almeria, marry me." Immediately, he berated himself silently for the outburst, the bad timing, everything about it. But he had to know her answer, he needed to know she'd be with him. He wished right then that he was ten years younger, that the war was long forgotten, that they were sitting in some romantic venue where he could feed her cherries and pet her hair. Anywhere but their ship on the eve of a conflict with the other captains, anywhere but a region of space that could erupt in chaos any moment, anywhen but the lead up to the battle with Namir. And yet he had to know. Gazing into her eyes, he only knew that he wanted to make sure she understood that he would never leave her again.
 
Almeria tilted her head slightly as Tra stumbled over his words, patient knowing he'd find what he wanted to say soon. When he did Almeria was shocked, stunned, flabbergasted. Her head had straightened in an instant and she looked at him. She had not seen this coming and she had no idea what to think.

But she didn't need to think. Before she had a chance to try say anything, her mouth in the shape of a small O, she started to nod her head ever so slightly and she was now gripping his hand. "Tra'eve, I... Of course," she said finally finding her voice. All that seemed important right then and there was Tra, with his blue eyes, impossible height, and now much shorter hair. She drank him in. It didn't seem quite real and yet she knew it was no dream. She wouldn't be so wore out and exhausted if it was a dream. She wouldn't be so scared either. "But, are you sure... you've been through so much."
 
As if on cue, he staggered slightly, then nodded. "I'm sure, Almeria. I really am." He wrapped her in his arms, pressing soft kisses to her hair, her forehead, her nose and finally her lips. "You mean so much to me. Thank you... thank you so much for being a part of my life." Reluctantly, he let her go, moving back to the bed and sitting on the edge. He smiled, and it was such a genuine, gentle and loving smile, slightly lopsided.

"I think I need to rest, though. As excited and happy as I am, I'm also very tired. My sweet love, I hope you don't mind. I'm recovering, I promise." He chuckled softly. "You are truly a blessing, Almeria. Now, you should go take care of what you needed to. Let me know what I must do today, for I'm still a bit unclear." He reached out a hand, beckoning her close and pulling her tight to him, his face nuzzled into the curve where her shoulder met the side of her neck. "Then, when everything is settled, we can decide... anything that needs decided."
 
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