Great pun for TK I've come up with...

I'd kick it first.. make sure it is not a bomb... If it blows up then i know not to open it..
 
*WMD bowls Chaos over and forces a hand grenade through his teeth and down his throat*

no one defies the mastress motherfucker.
 
*5 Captain Nics emerge from within the corrugated cardboard box after kicking it. The one with the tallest hat (his hat is 5 feet tall) asks you a question.*

Are you a bad enough dude to put the next President in office? *Y/N*
 
*GMK Begins to lube up his chainfist while grinning wildly ad Chaos*
 
..... I APPROVE OF THIS!