F
FiliaFlammae
Guest
Original poster
Tiwala answered him. Her voice sounded dull, and it was easy to tell she was just barely keeping that smile on her face, trying to be nice. She didn't truly mean to say that his tirade was not worth an apology... Perhaps it was excusable to some extent, since he had been upset and had indeed spoken his mind honestly, but that didn't mean he shouldn't apologize. Kidlat had hurt her, and she had every right to feel hurt.
But isn't her excusing me with that smile the exact same thing I do? It's politeness. She's being polite now, just as I would always defend. But it's so sad to watch on her. That's not how I look, is it? He didn't think so, but it caused him to pause.
At least she too apologized. That was something. He wasn't sure what to make of that awkward laugh she kept doing, though. A small part of him that still wanted to be angry at her wanted to interpret her fake smile as her not really feeling the apology, not really being sorry. But his instincts told him this was something else. It seemed more like she was trying to lighten the mood—for his sake?—and failing. She was troubled. He was reminded of the way he'd become aware of her exaggerated cheeriness back in the Guild Hall. Something troubled her, perhaps off and on, and could she really be blamed for putting forth a playful front? He knew he did. The question was how immersed one could get in that cheerful character. He could imagine a person desperately trying to act cheery just as he could imagine a person truly cheering up of their own accord. He typically succeeded with the latter, fortunately. Usually smiles just felt good to wear. But he couldn't honestly say that had been the case every time.
Kidlat was startled from his musings by a key falling on his head. "Aah!" He balked a little late at the sudden contact and made a few very clumsy motions with his hands, bouncing the key between them before he finally managed to catch it a couple of feet above the ground. He straightened up with the key in hand, initially embarrassed by how stupid he'd just looked, but when he looked back up at her, the mood went quiet again. He thought she'd murmured something, but he had missed it, and now he wasn't sure what to say to her next. What he did know was that he felt for her. The dull sting in his chest told him that. Would it be better for him to give her a few minutes to herself or try to talk to her? He looked off into the distance in the same direction her gaze was pointed. It was quiet for several moments. The two of them were alone here until the others returned. They could sit here in silence indefinitely, all too aware of each other, or Kidlat could break the tension.
He stepped a little closer to her and spoke in a low voice. Only a low voice felt appropriate now. "Y'know, if you ever think you'd feel better by talking about something that's bothering you...I'm here. I'll listen. And I promise, anything you say stays between us. You have my word." He looked up to her face at this last sentence, his facial expression solemn but earnest. When Chris gave his word, he meant it.
But isn't her excusing me with that smile the exact same thing I do? It's politeness. She's being polite now, just as I would always defend. But it's so sad to watch on her. That's not how I look, is it? He didn't think so, but it caused him to pause.
At least she too apologized. That was something. He wasn't sure what to make of that awkward laugh she kept doing, though. A small part of him that still wanted to be angry at her wanted to interpret her fake smile as her not really feeling the apology, not really being sorry. But his instincts told him this was something else. It seemed more like she was trying to lighten the mood—for his sake?—and failing. She was troubled. He was reminded of the way he'd become aware of her exaggerated cheeriness back in the Guild Hall. Something troubled her, perhaps off and on, and could she really be blamed for putting forth a playful front? He knew he did. The question was how immersed one could get in that cheerful character. He could imagine a person desperately trying to act cheery just as he could imagine a person truly cheering up of their own accord. He typically succeeded with the latter, fortunately. Usually smiles just felt good to wear. But he couldn't honestly say that had been the case every time.
Kidlat was startled from his musings by a key falling on his head. "Aah!" He balked a little late at the sudden contact and made a few very clumsy motions with his hands, bouncing the key between them before he finally managed to catch it a couple of feet above the ground. He straightened up with the key in hand, initially embarrassed by how stupid he'd just looked, but when he looked back up at her, the mood went quiet again. He thought she'd murmured something, but he had missed it, and now he wasn't sure what to say to her next. What he did know was that he felt for her. The dull sting in his chest told him that. Would it be better for him to give her a few minutes to herself or try to talk to her? He looked off into the distance in the same direction her gaze was pointed. It was quiet for several moments. The two of them were alone here until the others returned. They could sit here in silence indefinitely, all too aware of each other, or Kidlat could break the tension.
He stepped a little closer to her and spoke in a low voice. Only a low voice felt appropriate now. "Y'know, if you ever think you'd feel better by talking about something that's bothering you...I'm here. I'll listen. And I promise, anything you say stays between us. You have my word." He looked up to her face at this last sentence, his facial expression solemn but earnest. When Chris gave his word, he meant it.