Declaration of War on Vandoosa

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Blind Hemingway

Blind Hemingway

Ancient Iwaku Scum from 2006.
Original poster
MYTHICAL MEMBER
Posting Speed
  1. Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
NEVER
Writing Levels
  1. Adept
  2. Douche
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Primarily Prefer Female
Genres
Surrealism, Surreal Horror (Think Tim Burton), Steampunk, Sci-Fi Fantasy, Spaghetti Westerns, Mercenaries, Dieselpunk, Cyberpunk, Historical fantasies
800px-Personal_Flag_of_Robert_Shick.jpg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_6AQA4uzD0

The Most Glorious Nation of Staadtplatz has decided that is now time to invade the Red Meance, Vandoosa.

The reasons:

1. He's a Communist and is trying to extend his reign to other nations, as is proved in this piece of scandalous Vandoosain propaganda.

2. Vandoosians defile Our Most Glorious Nation by Glowing.

3. Vandoosians steal beer and replace it with vodka.

4. Vandoosians are always drunk and cause many traffic accidents but never pay their fines.

5. They seek to expand their Empire from just the loft they currently inhabit.

Wars have been started for less reason than these.

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High Command of the Staddtplatz forces is under the command of Admiral Lt Brigadier Colonel General Captian Marius whom is currently leading our armies towards the Vandoosain borders.
 
I'M IN.

WHERE DO I SHOOT.

*SHOOTS ISABOO IN THE FOOT*
 
Comrades, this is Felzilla, the Duce of our Most Glorious Allied Nation of FELOSLAVIKA.
 
LOL DO U TAKE SPICS IN YOUR ARMY SEÑOR???????''

I NEED A JOB BECAUSE I WAS TOO LAZY IN HOMELAND
 
Welcome aboard Fascist comrade. And since you come from third world country, you already know how to use a gun.
 
WOOO RACIAL SLURS!!!

*GOES 'THAT DIRECTION' AND SHOOTS ALL THE FILTH HE CAN FIND*
 
YES THANK YOU SEÑOR, I AM VERY GOOD WITH BIG GUNS. BLAM BLAM BLAM.

DO I GET LONG NAME, SEÑOR?

*SHOOTS A VODKA BOTTLE*
 
My fellow Staadplatzians, follow the example of our allied nation of Feloslakvia and defeat the Red Slime!

Most Honored Leader of the Undercouch, Divine Frau Ocha, your most wondrous dust bunnies will gain more couches, beds, and other such territories to ensure your nation's continued success.

Mr. Spic, we shall call you Gerneralmisso Ubernachogrande Franco.
 
well, according to my research (and the trend this thread is kinda following) you shall be named "darkness-o". now go make some tacos for the Vandoosians that would make the CDC cringe in fear.
 
FILTER YOUR TACO MEAT IN THE FILTH OF SWINE

AND THEN FEED IT TO THE VANDOOSIAN SWINE.


WHY AM I YELLING.
 
Our science team is working on the "Great Suck" a vaccum of military proportions.
 
BECAUSE, YOU ARE THE DUCE OF THE DUCHY OF FELOSLAVIKA. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO YELL TO INSPIRE THE MASSES.

Welcome aboard Frau Ocha. Your most glorious sciences shall defeat the Vandoosian pigdogs!
 
INSPIRE THE MASSES? WITH OUR VOICES? THE FEAR OF DEATH WILL DO... THESE ARE AFTER ALL COMMUNIST COUNTRIES.

YELLING AT THEM IS JUST FUN.
 
how about we just kill the other guys and save the inspirations for later? .....in fact, i order it to be that way! inspire by killing the VANDOOSIANS!!!!!!!
 
WE SHALL CRUSH THE COMMUNIST MEANCE FOR THEY SEEK TO PLANT SMALL SHRUBBERIES IN OUR BACKYARDS.
 
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

NON-ALLY COMMUNISTS.

NOBODY WANTS YOUR GODDAMN SHRUBBERIES.
 
all communists are non-allies. communists who are allies get plugged.
 
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