I dropped my keys in the cooling pool
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The Most Glorious Nation of Staadtplatz has decided that is now time to invade the Red Meance, Vandoosa.
1. He's a Communist and is trying to extend his reign to other nations, as is proved in this piece of scandalous Vandoosain propaganda.
2. Vandoosians defile Our Most Glorious Nation by Glowing.
3. Vandoosians steal beer and replace it with vodka.
4. Vandoosians are always drunk and cause many traffic accidents but never pay their fines.
5. They seek to expand their Empire from just the loft they currently inhabit.
Wars have been started for less reason than these.
High Command of the Staddtplatz forces is under the command of Admiral Lt Brigadier Colonel General Captian Marius whom is currently leading our armies towards the Vandoosain borders.