years later | winnie & oerba

[sunflower fairy]

It was hard for Luca, seeing Drew's face. It brought him back to a time in his life which he was trying to desperately to pretend didn't exist. She held good memories but they were inevitably accompanied by the bad. He could practically hear his parent's disapproving lectures. He could see the pitiful looks his younger siblings gave him. He could feel the pain letting his father hit him over and over. Who was Luca to fight back? He had deserved everything that they did to him.

But would things have actually been different if Luca had known about Drew's parents? He didn't want to think about it but some part of him forced him to. Would he still have left? Possibly. Would he have gone and said goodbye? Maybe, but that was too difficult to tell. Perhaps he would have tried to convince Drew to run away, too. Now, that had seemed likely. "You were always the only person that mattered to me, Drew. And I'm sorry that I hurt you. I wish things had been different," Luca relented. But he knew what it would mean if he had went to say goodbye to Drew. Seeing her would have convinced him to stay and he didn't want that. He wanted to run away into exile, and he knew Drew would have convinced him otherwise. Even if she didn't say anything, Luca knew that saying goodbye was going to make it impossible to leave.

"I need you to know that I never left because of you. What happened between us.. It didn't change how I felt about you, Drew. You were caught in the crossfire of my self-destruction," Luca lamented, his mind stinging with regret. "I was doomed from the start but I shouldn't have dragged you down with me," he continued, his eyes darkening.

Luca smiled, from eye to eye. It was only seconds before that he was recounting every bad thing that happened to, but hearing those words from Drew's mouth threw all those thoughts out of his mind. "Good. Because I am willing to work as hard as I can to get you back," Luca maintained. He nodded with remorse, slowly working on his understanding of Drew's side of things. "I still can be," Luca reassured, his expression softening. He still wanted to be her best friend, her main confidante. And if that meant returning, he'd do so. He'd just have to find a place to stay..

Entering the neighborhood next to the coffee shop, Luca looked over at Drew, "Mind guiding me to where I'm supposed to be going?"


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[winnie]

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Drew couldn't really stay mad at Luca for long. That's just how it had always been really, but now, knowing that he truly hadn't known, now that he knew he hadn't realised how it affected her when he left and was accepting that that fact, made Drew feel a little better. She wanted nothing more than to reconcile their friendship and pick up their relationship. She wanted to forget all of the things that happened in between because now at least, they had accounted for that and spoke about that, and things were getting cleared up. "Yeah," she nodded slightly and managed a small smile as she looked at him. "You still can be. And I would love that." She wanted nothing more than to be best friends again. Her time with him were some of the best of her life.

When he asked about guiding him, she looked ahead and realised they were on her block. She hadn't even noticed. "Oh, yeah, um, go straight and it's that building on the left." It was a three storey apartment building. Each floor only had two apartments, and hers was just one bedroom because she lived alone and spent most of her time at her grandmother's place anyway. For the night though, her and Luca could adjust easily. She'd just give him her bed and take the couch since she'd likely be the only one to fit on her small couch.

Once they parked, Drew got out and picked up her equipment from the back, waiting for Luca to lock up the car before she led him upstairs. "It's not much, but it's a place to stay for a year till I think about what I want to do next," she explained to him as she took him p the stairs. As usual, the elevator didn't work. The building was so old it was almost crumbling but at least her place had been recently renovated by the owner so it wasn't so bad. And inside she had made it more homely. More like her.

Upon opening the door, Drew set her equipment on a nearby table along with her keys and shrugged off Luca's jacket before draping it across a chair. "Make yourself at home," she said with a small smile and began to move toward the kitchen. "Do you want some coffee? Might help you sober up a bit more," she called out from inside the kitchen, already getting a pot going because she needed one.
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[sunflower fairy]

Luca couldn't help but smile in response to Drew's words. "I'd love that, too," he reassured. It felt so nice to be in her presence, again. Drew wasn't lively, loud, or overwhelming like most of his other "friends". She was more like an ocean; she was calming, beautiful, and mystifying. There was so much of Drew he still hadn't discovered or comprehended all of her. Even when the two were close, he felt somewhat shut off from Drew.

He nodded while listening to Drew's directions. His mind pondered the possibilities of where she lived. Knowing Drew, it likely wasn't too extravagant. They pulled up to Drew's apartment building, and Luca parked the car nearly running in to the car adjacent to his. Instead of worrying about his near fuck up, Luca settled for manically laughing. Mostly out of nervousness. " That.. would have sucked," he commented before exiting the car and following Drew up to her apartment.

One thing was still bugging Luca.. He didn't quite understand Drew's contradictions with her actions. She seemed extremely upset with Luca, and yet she invited him over. It didn't make sense that she was angry at him, but still offered to sleep with him. Then again, Luca had been gone a long time and perhaps this had been her new way of coping with negative emotions. But some part of him highly doubted that.. Drew was never like that. "You haven't thought about what's next?" Luca inquired.

It was difficult to ignore the fact that Drew's apartment complex seemed to be crumbling, although Luca tried. He felt a pang of sadness that this is what Drew had to come home to. Despite all of the messed up shit from his past, his home was always orderly, well-furnished, and unnecessarily decorated. And he hadn't stayed the night in a room for so long.. And he hardly considered sneaking out in the middle of the night from a random girl's house "staying the night". But what he witnessed when he entered Drew's apartment successfully eased his worries.

"This is nice," Luca decided, nodding his head in approval. He watched as Drew settled in and smiled at the sight of it. This was something he wished to see more often. "Don't you worry about that, I will," Luca laughed, continuing to examine the small apartment. He collapsed on Drew's tiny sofa, stretching his limbs across it. Luca had never been a big fan of coffee.. It had this earthy aftertaste that he'd rather not experience, but he'd never tell Drew that. After their years shared at the coffee house, he didn't think it was possible. "Yeah, of course," Luca said, masking his distaste.

"Where's Dom? Still a heartbreaker?"
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[winnie]

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When Luca asked her whether she hadn't planned anything next, Drew merely shook her head before realising that Luca couldn't see it since she was in the kitchen. "No," she called back out as she grabbed two coffee mugs from a cabinet. "I thought I'd take a year break, work a bit, and try to figure out what I want to do next. I mean I know it's obviously going to be related to photography, but I want to travel a bit. Get out of the country." That was something Drew hadn't done since her family had moved to America from Italy. She yearned to see different places in the world, of course, starting with her home town which she remembered nothing of as she'd only been a baby when they left.

After pouring the coffee, she brought out the two mugs, kicking her shoes off by the door in the process, and setting Luca's down on the coffee table in front of the couch he was laying on, before she perched herself on the arm rest of the same couch, fitting easily. She cradled the mug in her hands, taking advantage of the warmth it gave off.

As Luca asked about Dom, Drew chuckled. "Welll, he was until last year," she explained. "He met a girl in an elective class he took in college and he's been smitten ever since," Drew told him, leaning back slightly so she could rest her back against the couch. "They've been dating for almost a whole year now." She'd never seen her brother so serious about someone, especially considering he had a string of girlfriends when he'd been in high school. Quite the opposite of Drew, who'd had a total of two boyfriends in her whole life, aside from a huge crush she'd had on Luca once upon a time. Well, that hadn't exactly been a crush, it had been more than that since she really knew Luca. But there was no reason to think about that now.

"What about you?" She asked him the same question, filled with curiosity and slight eagerness to hear his answer. "Didn't find anyone while you were away? Or just certain company some nights?" Drew never judged him -- or anyone for that matter -- for one night stands, though she was quick to assume. It was just habit, having lived with her brother for most of her life, and of course, spending a majority of it with Luca, who had been the same in high school.

Once Drew sipped her coffee, almost burning her tongue in the process -- just another norm for her -- she nodded to the single bedroom in the apartment. "Oh, you can take the bed. I think you'll be really uncomfortable now. Just tell me when you're ready." Tat way she could get him a spare blanket and an extra pillow. Fortunately she kept that stuff on hand because Dom came to stay over sometimes.
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[sunflower fairy]

A break, hm? So, even Drew got tired of their stupid town. After having never been one place for long, it felt surreal coming back. It was weird telling himself that we was determined to stay, if only to convince Drew that he was serious about winning her back. Luca had just hoped that travelling did more for Drew than it had done for him.. Though he was a bit disheartened, hearing that Drew was planning on leaving just as Luca had returned. "Well, whatever you decide, I know you'll do great," Luca reassured,calling back to the brunette.

Drew set his coffee in front of him, and Luca couldn't help but scowl at the mug. He picked the cup up, sipped at the coffee, burned his mouth, and set the coffee back down after the betrayal. How Drew could stand the burning sensation, Luca would never know. Hearing the news about Dominic had shocked Luca, he had never taken her brother as the type of guy to settle down. He was unsure of how to feel about Dominic's changed ways.

"A whole fucking year? Damn, good for Dom," Luca said, though he couldn't bring himself to muster any fake enthusiasm. "You like her?" he further inquired despite his lack of interest. It was a tad upsetting that Dom seemed to have figure himself out before Luca.. He always joked that Dom seemed more like a sibling of his than Drew's. But he had always expected to get his shit together at one point or another, and it didn't seem like that time was coming in the near future.

Luca chuckled at Drew's question. His current love life was anything but interesting and practically identical to how it was in high school. It was certain company most nights, but that wasn't something Drew needed to know. "Yeah, no.. I didn't really meet anyone of interest. Not yet, at least," Luca replied, though his answer failed to mention that he hadn't been looking for anything long term. No commitments was how Luca functioned best. "And you, little miss Drew? Run into anyone worth your time recently?" Luca teased, cocking an eyebrow knowingly.

Why was she treating this whole ordeal like a business matter? Her casualness about sleeping together was unsettling to Luca. He wasn't sure if any of this was a good idea, but this was what Drew wanted and he wasn't going to reject her again. "I, uh.. Whenever you're ready, I guess?" Luca decided. He'd be lying if he said he never thought about them together.. But he never wanted Drew to settle for such a fuck up. Luca grimaced at the thought, and he was confused as to how continue.
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[winnie]

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Drew hardly had to think about it when Luca asked if she liked Dom's long term girlfriend. "Yeah, she's really nice. I can see she's really changed his womanizing ways so that's a plus," she said with a small laugh. "And they both seem incredibly happy together so that's all that really matters," she explained further with a small shrug. Drew had to admit she was glad her brother hadn't fallen for a real bitch because then it would have been harder to accept the fact that they were happy together.

Drew continued to sip her coffee, eventually beginning to take large swigs of it. She drank so much of the stuff that even if it was scalding hot, she could probably guzzle it down without a problem. She had burned her tongue plenty of times. Soon enough, she was already done by the time Luca took his first sip. Setting the cup down on the table, she glanced at Luca again as he explained that he hadn't met anybody yet. When he asked her the same thing, she pursed her lips, thinking of the best way to respond.

"Well, I was seeing a guy," she nodded in agreement before continuing. "Like a couple of months after I started college. It was going good. Lasted about a year before I realised it was toxic." She didn't know how she felt going into detail about it just yet but she would leave it at that. She was only still reconnecting with Luca. She didn't think it was the right time to explain that she had been an idiot for staying as long as she did with a guy that had a temper like he did.

Drew shrugged and decided to switch the topic because she didn't want to have to answer questions about it.

Hearing Luca say he was ready for bed whenever she was ready made her raise a brow. Why was he being so weird about going to bee? Shaking her head slightly, she shrugged. "I mean, soon, I guess? I have to get up early." Hopping off the arm chair, she walked toward the bedroom. "Come on." She may as well show him where the spare blankets and stuff were so he could sleep whenever he pleased. She'd probably just grab herself a blanket, change, and then pass out on the couch in mere minutes.
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[sunflower fairy]

All this talk of relationships made Luca wonder if he'd ever find a girl that could convince him to commit and finally settle down. He was never a family person, and he couldn't ever see that changing. Imagining a world where miniature Luca-s were running around made him feel uncomfortable. "Are you saying being a womanizer is a bad thing? Some of us are just free spirits," Luca teased. Raising his coffee cup Luca declared, "To happiness!"

As for Drew, Luca was also unable to imagine her as a parent. Considering she'd only had one semi-serious boyfriend he knew of in high school, he doubted she'd ever let anyone impregnate her.. Not that she wouldn't make a good mom, Luca could see her as a caring and supportive figure to her children. But even if she adopted, he doubted her anxious ways would allow her to be fully functional as a mother.

So, two boyfriends? The way her tone changed when Luca asked about this other boyfriend, he doubted it was a good relationship. "A year's a long time to figure out someone's toxic," Luca replies, though he didn't press the subject. A year was a lot of time to pump into someone at all, let alone someone who seemed undeserving of the effort. "The right guy will come to you, Drew," he added, trying his best to comfort his friend. Or ex-friend. Acquaintance?

"And you're sure about this?" Luca persisted, abandoning his coffee cup to follow Drew to the bedroom. He didn't know what to feel.. he was just so conflicted. Here Drew was, informing Luca that their situation had to be.. dealt with quickly because she had other obligations. None of it made sense but who was Luca to judge her? He understood the loneliness she was likely trying to escape from and he was, if anything, honored to be the person she resorted to. But weren't there healthier ways of coping with anger and sadness? Wasn't Drew supposed to be the one convincing him to not resort to physicality?

Entering her bedroom, Luca felt a sense of vulnerability that was foreign and unwelcome. Usually all of this came natural. It should have been a smooth transition from polite conversation to getting hot and heavy but all he felt was tension. His usual assertiveness had faltered and he didn't know how to proceed. "So, um," Luca began, not sure where he was going. "You look very beautiful," Luca encouraged, faking a smile.

Gathering his mind, Luca gently caressed the back of Drew's head. He wasn't going to fuck this up. He delicately pulled her in. He didn't want to be a failure anymore. And in a soft motion, he gingerly tilted her face up.. He'd figure his life out, he'd be happy one day. He pressed his lips to hers. He was worthy of something more.
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[winnie]

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Drew figured the right guy would come along eventually but it wasn't something that she wanted to worry herself about. She wasn't looking for a relationship. If it happened then so be it but it wasn't something she was actively seeking out. In fact, she never had, except when it came to her feelings for Luca back in high school. That was about the only real time she had allowed herself to fall for a friend. The only time she had tried to make the first move. Considering it hadn't ended well, she never did that anymore.

Leading Luca to the bedroom, she raised an eywbrow once again, before chuckling slightly. "Um, yeah? I wouldn't have asked you to stay over if i wasn't sure." Drew was beginning to think that Luca was a little more drunk than he let on considering he was being pretty weird and asking her if she was sure about letting him stay over. She wanted to make sure he wasn't in an accident or anything. It was really no big deal.

She was about to go to the closet at the end of the room when she heard Luca's words. He called her beautiful. It shouldn't have sounded so odd but Drew was surprised by it. She turned to face him only to realise he was quite close to her. "Okay, how drunk are you?" She asked with a small chuckle. That was the only thing she could peg this behaviour on.

But then he caressed the back of her head, pulled her close, and tilted her head up. She was looking directly at him and she knew what he eas about to do yet she didn't move. She couldn't. She was still stunned. Her heart was racing, pounding in her chest. Before she knew it, his lips were pressed against hers. Part of Drew had remembered when she had wanted this back in high school and feeling it now felt... well it was indescribable.

But the fact that it was happening now, when so much had gone wrong — not to mention he was drunk — the kiss was a wake up call and it forced her to pull away.

"We shouldn't be doing this," she said softly, taking a step away. Her lips were tingling but she did her best to ignore it. He probably wouldn't even remember this in the morning. His inroxicated state could be the only explanation for his behaviour. Right?

"You're drunk and it's all kinds of wrong," she said, chuckling nervously before she turned, trying to avoid meeting his gaze.
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[sunflower fairy]

Wasn't it a good thing he asked? With so many girls being taken advantage of, Luca was insistent on confirming that this was something Drew actually wanted to do.. So, her response only served to further confuse him. "I don't know," Luca laughed nervously, attempting to cover up his insecurity. "I just wanted to make sure you hadn't changed your mind," Luca added, his hand moving up to scratch an imaginary itch on his upper arm.

This is what she wanted. But Luca couldn't comprehend why Drew was being so fucking weird about it! It only made his struggle with accepting their decision more difficult. Maybe he should tell her this is a bad idea.. Or maybe he could run back to the living room and find an excuse as to why he couldn't go through with any of this.

But he kissed her anyways. It was a bittersweet feeling, and Luca tried to conceal his desperation to prove himself. And yet Drew pulled away. She claimed that what they were doing wasn't right and it frustrates Luca. How could she change her mind so quickly? Had he done something wrong? "I -- I don't understand," Luca stammered. "I thought this is what you wanted," he bellowed, trying his best to hide the hurt he felt.

He could still taste the bitter coffee on his lips and he despairingly wished it away. "I'm not that drunk," Luca retorted, defensively. He was unsure of who exactly he was trying to convince. "Wrong?" Luca whispered. "Drew.." But he was too battered to continue. So he stood there, in silence, trying to grasp an understanding of their current situation. He'd never been rejected before. And despite Luca's best efforts, he still managed to fail and he couldn't bear it. He felt unwanted.

"Maybe I should just go."
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[winnie]

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Drew was so incredibly confused. What could have possibly made him think that she had wanted this? Okay perhaps when they were back in high school she would have wanted it but this was years later. She didn't feel that way. Heck, she had already made it clear that she was mad at him for having left without saying anything.

"I never said that," she said softly, turning back around to look at him with a frazzled expression. "I mean why else would you do it if not because you're drunk?" She asked him, the confusion written on her face plain as day. It was okay, it was a slip up. He probably wouldn't even remember it but he seemed confused too, and she didn't get why.

"Look, Luca," she continued, seeing that he seemed stumped. Almost like he failed something. "I don't mean wrong like... i just..." she had no clue how to explain it. She didn't mean it was wrong because he didn't want it but rather because he was drunk. But how could she explain that without insinuating that she had wanted it, because she hadn't. Not explicitly at least.

"Look, just please don't leave because of it," she told him softly. "I don't want you driving like this and not so late at night. We can... we can just forget it ever happened. That's all." She didn't really what else to say about it. She still couldn't understand why he seemed so lost.
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[sunflower fairy]

Yeah, she didn't directly said it but it seemed she had made it pretty clear through other means. Or at least, that's what Luca had been thinking. Perhaps assumptions would be both of their downfalls as they seemed to be causing an abundance of pain. Overall, Luca had felt completely and utterly stupid. He had somehow tricked himself into believing that Drew wanted him. But that seemed like a fucking joke now. Why would she want him anyways?

"I know, I just.. I don't know," his voice was just above a whisper. Luca's hands retreated into his pockets, seeking the warmth of Drew's face. He chuckled at her question, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "I don't know that you'd like my answer," Luca confessed, inching away from the short brunette. He had done a lot of shit he regretted when he was drunk.. But this was a different type of regret.

The pain in Luca's chest was unexplained, though he couldn't bring himself to look over at Drew. "No, I get it, Drew. Not really the 'right guy' type," Luca said somberly, referencing their earlier conversation. He forced the smallest of smiles, if only to try and persuade Drew against pitying him. He didn't need that, not from her.

Luca heaved a sigh, considering Drew's words. "I don't think I can forget," he glowered, trailing a finger across his lips. It was ironic, as it was just a couple of hours prior that Drew was declaring she couldn't forget what Luca had done. What did she want from him? "What's the plan then?" Luca replied, humoring Drew's request for him to stay.
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[winnie]

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This whole thing couldn't be going south when they had just begun to rehash things from their past. They'd managed to work out most of the things they had problems with -- well, mainly Drew had the problem -- so she couldn't understand why things were taking a turn all of a sudden. It was all fine... till the kiss. What had it even meant exactly? He said he thought she wanted it so did he think that was what she invited him over for? And if so, what prompted him to agree to it? Like earlier in the night, Drew had many questions, it was just that these questions were much different than the ones she held before.

"Don't say that," she said softly when he called himself not the 'right guy' type. "If my feelings for you in the past meant anything to you then you know that's not true." She was finally acknowledging that out loud, since the time they met that night. It had been insinuated a bit, but now she was referencing it directly. She would never really think he wasn't the 'right guy' type. It was just that when she wanted him, he hadn't been available, and she had moved on since then. The situation was being grossly misread.

"Just... stay the night. Sober up. And we can talk about it in the morning if you still want to," she told him, crossing her arms as she looked up at him. She was prompted by her inner thoughts not to meet his gaze but she defied those thoughts and looked at him directly. She wanted him to know she was serious when she said that there was nothing about him that was wrong. The situation was just really complicated and delicate, and it didn't make things easier that he was under the influence of alcohol.

"If you don't feel comfortable staying over that's fine too, I can call you a cab or something," she offered as an alternative, if the problem was her. "I just don't want you to drive tonight. I don't want anything happening to you." She'd never forgive herself if she allowed him drive like this, not just slightly intoxicated, but with his emotions clearly running high... it was a recipe for disaster. She wouldn't allow anything to happen to him on her watch. And they wer eonly just starting to reconnect.
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[sunflower fairy]

He didn't like this feeling. He still couldn't understand what Drew was trying to say and he felt cold being so far away from her. But Luca had done this exact same thing to her, but it was likely more painful. He had merely brushed off her confession and distanced himself from her. There was no closure for her and Luca felt like an even bigger jackass realizing how that must have hurt her.

Everything was starting to feel suffocating.. Drew's room, the distance between them, his clothes felt like they were trying to strangle him. "It's different now and you know that," Luca responded harshly, disregarding her attempt to comfort him. He'd never been the right guy and he was a fucking fool for thinking he could pretend to be. His place belonged in the arms of different women each night, women who would forget his name and eventually his existence. He was just a fucking on people's memories; he was a bad decision.

Perhaps he naively convinced himself this was what Drew wanted as an excuse to go through with his desires. Of course it didn't make sense that Drew was coming onto him, but it was enough to get Luca to act. He glanced over at Drew, continuing to mentally gloss over her words, and found that she was gazing at him with a rather fierce look in her eye. He didn't feel drunk, but he'd pretend it influenced him if that was what helped Drew. When he had leaned in, he was only thinking about Drew, about how he failed her. If at all, alcohol had little to do with his rash decision.

Why did she care? If her intentions hadn't been physical and she was obviously upset at Luca, why did she even fucking care what happened to him? But his energy to argue was gone, replaced by something more grim. "No, I wouldn't even have a place to go," Luca attempted to joke, refusing her coffee for a cab. He thought more about her proposal, but the longer he thought the harder it seemed to allow himself to stay. "I'll stay," he declared. It felt like he had just willingly thrown himself at his impending doom. "I'll stay," he repeated, as if to solidify his decision.
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[winnie]

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Drew bit down on her lip as she watched Luca. Part of her wanted to continue thinking that this was all the alcohol but didn't alcohol usually make a person's secrrts come out? So regardless of whether this was the alcohol or not, she could tell something was up. Because if he was drunk, he was telking the truth. If he wasn't drunk, he wouldn't be acting like this unless it was the truth. It made her wonder just what was going on inside his head. It made her wonder what really happened all those years ago and why he'd left.

She was still glad to hear him decide to stay in the end. The last thing she wanted was for him to get into an accident or something. "Thank you," she said softly, fiddling with a stray string from her dress absently because she tended to fiddle with things when she was nervous or frustrated — in this case it was a bit of both. "I know we had a falling out before and for a while I kind of resented you for it, but that never meant i stopped caring, Luca."

Bot knowing what else to say, Drew headed to the nearby closet to rummage around for a spare blanket and pillows. Once she found what she needed, she set them down on the bed and grabbed what she needed for herself on the couch before heading out of the room and setting those aside. She could just change out there. It looked like Luca needed a good night's rest.

Coming back into the room, Drew looked around and then back at Luca. "I think that's it," she thought aloud. "Do you need anything else?" She asked him curiously. "Something to eat maybe? Or do you just want to crash?" She was exhausted herself so she would head to bed pretty soon. Seeing her bed, she was so tempted to just pass out right now but if he was hungry then she could whip up something quick.
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[sunflower fairy]

His stomach churned at the idea of staying, but Luca couldn't run away every time something went rotten. He was still determined to prove himself, and running away the first time did little to solve his problems. But he could barely look at his old friend without wanting to slap himself. Everything he did seemed to cause an even bigger drift to settle between them. Luca resented himself, just as much as Drew probably had. What was he thinking?! Kissing Drew was a mistake, he knew that, and yet he was disappointed that she hadn't let him.

Her "thank you" felt like Drew had just spit on his face. It was like the last nail of his coffin of self-destruction and resentment. But ultimately, Luca had felt utterly defeated. He nodded, despite Drew's words failing to relieve any of the gloom he felt. It was a melancholy feeling, to be tended to and cared for by someone who denied his advances. "Apparently I still cared, too," Luca quipped, attempting to make light of their situation. He didn't want to be engulfed by his negativity.

Luca watched as Drew shifted in and out of the room. Trying to push his shame away, Luca dropped onto Drew's bed. He watched the ceiling as he allowed his mind to wander to taboo thoughts: his family. Despite how much he hated to admit it, he missed them. Especially Eliza, his "long lost sister". She was the product of his father's affair with another secretary or some shit, but his father never claimed her. But Luca reached out to Eliza and her mom, and a weird friendship was born. He loved her. So, when she was diagnosed with some disease with a name he couldn't pronounce, the little amount of sanity he had was lost. He abandoned Eliza. And he hated himself for it.

The aching in his heart was interrupted by Drew's reappearance. He wondered if he could trick her into believing that he hadn't remembered any of this tomorrow. It'd save him a lot of explaining. "I'm fine," he curtly responded, sitting himself up. "Think I need a break from causing chaos," he continued. Despite the dark undertone, Luca tried his best to keep his voice light and playful. He gestured to the spot on the bed next to him, inviting Drew to sit down. He then suddenly realized that not sleeping together meant.. they couldn't sleep together. So, Luca quickly stood up.

"I'll just be in the living room, if you need me."
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[winnie]

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Drew could tell that Luca wasn't really fine. Something was really bothering him and for some reason, that really bothered her. He looked like he was holding onto a number of different emotions and it wouldn't be long befre he exploded. She knew a little something about that with all she held in after her parents died and the rough patch with what she thought was a good relationship. Her gried over her parents had led her down a toxic path though in a different way than most would believe. It wasn't as if she started drinking her sorrows away or anything. She just made the same mistake over and over by fooling herself into staying with a horrible guy because she feared she wouldn't get any better.

But Drew had her brother to talk some sense into her. She had her grandmother to allow her to share her grief and her feelings and by puring herself out, she had managed to get back on track. She got better. She knew that this was all Luca needed to help him get back on track because it seemed like even he felt that he needed it. She just had a feeling he didn't realise he could do that as yet. And Drew wanted to help.

When Luca invited her to sit down, she assumed it was to sit and talk so she sat down but as soon as she did, he got up. "Oh," she said softly. "I intended for you to sleep here," she told him, gesturing to the bee. "I think your legs would just dangle over the edge of the couch and that can't be comfortable," she told him with a small chuckle, trying to lighten the mood a little.

After a small moment of hesitation, Drew spoke again. "Do you want to talk?" She asked him softly, patting the bed for him to sit just like he had moments ago. "No arguments or judgement, I swear," she added with a small smile before continuing. "Just... I'm just here to listen if you want to vent or just... let stuff out." She knew he had a lot of pent ip feelings and it was better it got out now than later. Besides, he knew he could trust her. She didn't have to remind him. It was up to him to decide what he wanted to do, ultimately.
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[sunflower fairy]

He needed to get over himself. This night wasn't about it. It was about reuniting with Drew, mending old wounds, and moving on. But as the night went on, that goal seemed more and more impossible. Kissing Drew brought back long repressed feelings, and new feelings he hadn't realized he had. She meant something, and his time apart had proved that. Her presence was something Luca sought after in others, but he never found the person to replace her. He had hoped that tonight would ignite an old passion that was long forgotten about. Luca was tired of being alone.

Yeah, he had intended to be spending the night in Drew's bed, as well.. But that seemed too weird to do now, even if it was by himself. "No, it's your bed, I insist," Luca countered, awkwardly looking down at Drew. He felt alienated, as weird as that sounded. He felt like a spectacle for Drew to look at and pity, which made looking at her unbearable. Was it too much to ask just not to exist for a few minutes? It'd give him time to collect his thoughts and stop acting like a jackass.

Talk? No, he just wanted to fucking sleep and forget about this night. "Yeah, of course," Luca lied, with a smile. He knew he wasn't going to be judged, Drew never judged him. Despite all his fuck ups, the brunette remained there for him. He was unsure if this was due to loyalty or pity, either way, Luca was grateful for her kindness. He eyed the spot next to Drew, suspiciously, attempting to decide whether or not it was a good idea to sit down.

"What would I even vent about?" Luca questioned, hoping that Drew would somehow have an answer for him. He slowly made his way back to the bed, before seating himself. It felt like a mini victory, to be sitting so close to Drew. "I'm sure you have some burning questions for me.. How about you get the ball rolling for me, hm? Ask me something, yeah? I'll try to be as honest as possible, I promise," Luca guaranteed, flashing an award-winning smile.

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[winnie]

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Drew watched as Luca agreed and then proceeded to sit down on the bed. That made her more comfortable so instead of sitting still and sturdy, she allowed herself to relax a bit and she crossed her legs, lenaing back against the pillows as she looked at him.

"You could vent about anythhing. That's what venting is," she told him with a small smile. "Whatever's on your mind that you feel like you need to get off your chest or out of your mind," she explaines further. The fact that he asked her though made her feel like maybe there was a lot more to vent about than he let on — or that she assumed.

Hearing him tell her to ask him something, Drew took a couple of moments to think. What could she ask him? It wasn't like she was some certified therapist or anything. She was there to listen but the last thing she wanted to do was ask the wrong questions that might dampen their relationship again.

Nevertheless, she came up with something. "Alright," she said, nodding a little as she tried to come up with something.

"Umm... okay. What prompted you to leave town?" She asked him. This was partially to satiate her curiosity but she also knew that was where this all began to maybe figuring out that might help him feel better or clear things up a bit.
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[sunflower fairy]

It didn't feel right, sitting next to Drew and pretending what he had done didn't occur. It seemed that Drew had long moved on but Luca was still struggling with his recovery. And at the same time, he didn't want to acknowledge his stupidity .. What was the right thing to do? He assumed Drew was just attempting to spare him of further embarrassment and tension.. Luca wanted this friendship to work but was that really possible if they ignored every mishap they experienced?

Okay, so he had realized it was a possibility that Drew would ask him this question. But he was desperately hoping their early conversation would have satisfied her need to know why he left. "Haven't we talked about this already?" Luca responded, nervously. Although, his earlier answer did not include a lot of truth. It felt like a lot of pressure to go from ignoring one bad thing Luca did to talking about another of his bad things. Was it too much to ask Drew just to drop the subject of him leaving? But he promised to be honest, and he didn't want to break his first promise with Drew. "I had no reason to stay."

"Everything was just going to shit and I couldn't -- I didn't -- want to handle it. This particular incident, I got really fucking drunk.. And I fucked up. Got arrested. I didn't hurt anyone or anything, but it was enough for my parents to kick me out," Luca confessed, reluctantly. Burying his memories of that night had been a priority of his for 6 years.. And one night with Drew caused all of it to come crashing down. "It's not like I could go to you anymore. And no one else gave a shit about me so I left."

Misplaced resentment was one of Luca's specialties.. And it was currently aimed at Drew for making him feel obligated to discuss his past. "Not the story you were looking for, huh?" he continued, bitterness evident in his voice.

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[winnie]

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Drew looked at Luca and nodded. "We have," she agreed when he asked that they had spoken about this already. "But I know you weren't entirely truthful. Or, rather, you failed to own up to a few things so it wasn't the entire truth," she pointed out to him, crossing her arms as she leaned back against the pillows and looked at him. He clearly was trying to avoid the subject which made her wonder just what it was that made him leave.

Hearing his words though, made her feel better because she knew he was sticking to his word — he was being honest. That was all she had wanted really. There were very rarely any times that Drew would judge a person, especially luca who was basically her best friend. That hadn't changed even now, despite having been apart for so long and not on talking terms.

So his parents had kicked him out. She hadn't known that. She always wondered why his parents never said anythhing about where luca was or even mentioned him that much. When they were younger, she went over to their place a lot considering her parents were their friends. but to think that tose people kicked out their son? She knew he may have fucked up but she still couldn't imagine that they'd kicknhim out. At that point he needed help, not abandonment.

"I wasn't looking for any kind of story, Luca," she told him with a soft tone after he had spoken. "I only wanted to hear what actually happened because unless I know that I feel helpless. I wouldn't know how else to help and it was killing me because I knew something was up," she continued, pulling her legs close to her chest and hugging her knees. She rested her chin on her arm and looked at him. "I wish you would have come to me though," she said after a short paise. "Even with everything that happened, there's never be a time where I'd push you away."
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