Whelp, the hiatus is over.

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For the last few months I have been really, really suffering from y depression. My poor apartment suffered for it, I just got around to cleaning it again. My weight has dropped from 184 to 154 due to lack of eating, and I have slept far more than I should have while not at work, out with friends, etc. I made up every single excuse not to go out. I put a distance between people and myself.

Well, I finally snapped out of it. For the first time in a while I have been able to really smile, and I've realized something; life is full of hard obstacles. Depression is a horrible thing to suffer from ad it is really, really hard to pull yourself out of it. It makes you feel so low and alone; at least that's how it made me feel. But I realized that the word around me was bustling with kind, loving people who are willing to listen when you need it. Halloween I lost my phone, and I was in a full panic because I thought that I would never find it ever again. I didn't care about the numbers or not being able to call people, what I cared the most about was the important information that I had on it and a picture I had. It was very last picture I had of my grandmother. I'd practically given up finding it. Strangers reached out and helped me to find it again, it really helped me to realize that I wasn't alone.

I never want to feel like that again, ever. But I got around to thinking; what about everyone else feeling the same way I feel? I can't imagine it. Maybe that makes me sound arrogant or something, but I hate the thought of another being suffering like that. So, I wanted to make a post to tell you how much you matter. While you might feel like hell, alone and really hurting, know that what you do, who you are, matters. You are a beautiful soul, and have great potential. Whatever mistakes, they help build you into a better person. If I had a penny for every single mistake I have made in my life, I'd be a rich man. I'd not take any of it back, because I'm not a bad person. You are not a bad person; people make mistakes in their lives and that is how life is meant to be. You make a mistake and you learn from it, keep moving and don't give up.

Don't stop being you, and don't let that voice tell you that you aren't deserving of happiness, because you are.

I know this seems like a wishy washy post, and it is. I'll freely take the beatings for the feelings, but I decided that I wanted to turn my hardship into a good thing; I don't want people to not hear that they matter, because they do. You do.

Space Cowboy

You’re gonna carry that weight.
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I suffer from dysthymia and depression sucks really, really bad. I hear you, bruh, on all of that. And I'm so glad you were able to pull yourself out of your funk. Only recently was I able to pull myself out of my latest funk (that lasted several months). I burned a few bridges inadverantly and hurt a good number of people as well, but I'm trying again. That's what matters.

Thank you for posting this, and I hope you keep doing better and keep kicking more ass.

And to others reading, what was said above, I stamp with 100% approval. You matter. You matter so much. And you can do it! You've done it before, and if you haven't, you're going to do it. I know you can. I know you will. We both do. Everyone does.

You're awesome. Never forget that. <3


Original poster
Glad you made it out too Seiji. Depression is a bitch to deal with, and a lot of people underestimate how hard it really is. But always, always remember that there are people here willing to listen, and you are worth happiness.
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Original poster
Posted something on a roleplay that I wanted people to read, it relates to this, though I adjusted it to fit a talking post instead of a roleplay.

There is only one you in this world, Melody. Only one; people share qualities like eyes, hair, skin, physical things. But they will never match you. And because of this, it makes you unique to the world, giving you the chance to work wonders. You matter more than you know and give yourself credit for. For if it is one thing that you always need remembered is that you are smart, compassionate and a beautiful soul; don't give that up, and don't forget it. You can make a difference in someone's life, by just talking to someone, you have made an impact on someone else. And that means something big.
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