"The Cast List": The Movie! The Thread! The RP! The TERROR!

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(Refer to http://www.iwakuroleplay.com/showthread.php?t=14845 for your roles and, uh... enjoy? Some roles on the second page. Oh, and feel free to steal roles.)


It was a dark and windy night that morning, and the books on the library shelves rustled in an unseen wind. Strange noises issued from the back room, but that was fairly normal for this place. Asmodeus walked out of the basement, carrying a stack of romance novels, their grimy pages stuck together by the ravages of... uh... time. We'll just say time. On the windowsill, a seemingly innocent cat licked himself, contemplating the time and how many licks it would take to burrow into the bank vault at the local branch.

"Damn these romance novels! If I wasn't so busy cleaning and organizing them," proclaimed Asmo, gesticulating wildly for no reason in particular, "I could be encouraging the denizens of this world to find their paths and become more evolved and cultured beings on a true journey! Instead, I have to clean up after that damn Gossip Columnist."

The other two library keepers looked up from their pursuits, Tegan refusing to speak as she was trying to figure out just what a scone was and how to make it seek gainful employment and Jack Shade, who was trying to remember just how he had gotten to work in the first place, looking at him in a cool, collected manner.

"Why don't you just ban her from the library?"

"She's the chief of the intergalatic police. Do you have any idea what are in those files of mine that she could use in her column?"

"Gay affairs with that former cop who doesn't want to unholster his gun anymore?" Tegan chimed in, finally giving up on the scones.

"Meow," said the seemingly innocent cat.

"You be silent, feline vagabond. Haven't you anywhere else to be?" Asmo snarled, then tossed the romance novels onto the ground. "There must be something to be done about this mess that will actually make this pile of drivel worth reading! Let alone repeatedly sterilizing."

 
I like this.
-Chucks thread to the floor.-
ANOTHER. >:C
 
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This is an oddly accurate depiction of my personal life... *Shakes Revision* WHO ARE YOUR INFORMANTS?! WHOSE COCK DID YOU SUCK?!


I WANT NAMES!!!! *pistol whips, dawg*
 
The awesome of this thread made me time all over myself.
 
Malkuthe was busily pondering his place in the world. It was a good past time, and far more entertaining than the boring task of actually having to iron wrinkles into his skinny jeans. Frowning at the strange clouds forming in the sky, Malk leaned against the outer wall of the bookstore. So many books inside, but Malk knew well that today was the day that Paorou and Zypher usually made their trips to the store and wanted to stay well out of their way.

Still, he pondered the great adventures to be found within. He was not much more than a willing pawn in the universe's game, but the universe had decided not to play this afternoon and was contemplating a nap. Leaving Malk decidedly without a play mate.

Meanwhile, across town, school was letting out. Miru and Staci skipped down the sidewalk, holding hands, their other hands occupied with their new video game console. Little did the school children know that the next few mashes of the buttons would split open dimensions and unleash the horrors that resided within. Buttons were mashed.

A dark chuckle filled the air as dark clouds formed in an ominous procession across the already cloudy sky. So really, it wasn't that noticeable unless you'd already been paying attention to the sky. Fortunately, someone was.

Tribs, the Master of Dolls, frowned as he looked up to the sky. His nemesis, Kehvarl, a dragon of immense and ancient coding skill inherited from the very gods of the internet, lifted his head.

"It might rain," he spoke, then yawned and went back to his current project.

"You fool!" Tribs shouted, throwing his hands up and knocking several dolls off of their perches. "Oh no!" He spent the next several minutes righting the dolls and straightening their wigs before turning to Kehvarl.

"What was I saying? Oh, yes. Fool. You. Right. YOU FOOL! Have you no idea what has happened?"

"The atmosphere has become sufficiently saturated to precipitate precipitation?"

"...I hate you."

 
​BUTTON MASHING. O ^O MASH ALLLLLL THE BUTTONS.
 
Except the control pad. The control pad is sacred. +A+
 
MORE. MOAR. MOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR