Talking to the Game

[Minibit]

Do you talk to your games or game characters (excluding multiplayer chat) as you play? Do you trash talk the bosses, or urge your healer to hurry up?

Share your frantic, entertaining, and silly game talk!



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When my Pokemon are confused I get WAAAY bipolar. It's like:
Sparky is confused!
"Okay Sparky you got this. His hp is down, we've got the rainstorm, I just need a thunderbolt. Come on Sparky, I believe in you, you got this boy, if you can do this I'll totally buy you a massag-"
Sparky hurt itself in it's confusion!
"YOU RETARDED LITTLE USELESS PIECE OF SHIT. YOU GET ONE MORE SHOT, MISTER, ONE SHOT, AND THEN IM CALLING ROSIE OUT AND YOU CAN SIT BACK AND WATCH A WALKING FUCKING FLOWER BLOSSOM TEACH YOUR PATHETIC ASS HOW TO BATTLE!"

 

[Kylulu]

I talk to… at all my games. Recently played Shadow of the Colossus for the first time, which made some pretty hilarious commentary.

"Oh, you're a tiny colossu-aaaah!! No! Bad! Stop tackling me! God dammit, let me stand up! Gah, okay. Safe-ish here. What do we do now, Wander?"

"…That thing is massive! Wait, what's it… oh shit! Move Wander! Mooooooove! …Dammit. That hurt. Okay, let's not get too close to the massive stomping feet."

"Aggro? Aggro! Fucking horse, get over here!"

Mario Kart/Party are ones where I shout at the computer players a lot, while simultaneously encouraging the characters I'm controlling. It feels like it helps.

 

[Santario]

Oh gods do I ever talk at/yell at my video games.

Mincraft: "No go away creeper. No bad! Bad creeper JUST DIE ALREADY"
Skyrim: "AHAHAHAHA Look he walked right into me still doesn't see me. Stupid moron...-Assassinate- Bwahahaha"
Thief: "Okay if I sit right here he wont see me...Wait...Why is he...shit...Now I have to kill him."
"Come on you stupid lock I have like two MoFoing seconds to get through this damn door before that prick sees me UNLOCK ALREADY"

Theres more...Lots more and normally a lot more cursing and or smashing my face into my bed.

 

[MurderDeathKill]

I rarely talk to my games, and when I do, it's almost always "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!" This is especially common in Ninja Gaiden games on higher difficulties and Dark Souls.

 

[Fijoli]

Mario games

"I would rather cut myself and bleed out all over the concrete than to play this mario level one more time."

~sacrifices yoshi to save mario~ "ITS NOT YOU YOSHI, ITS MEEEEE"

"WAH TAH, HOOOYY YAH!! OOOOO WAH TAH" ~runs all the way through a level~


Harvest moon

"No damit you milked that cow aldready"

~ is fishing, reels in a boot, repeats this 5 times ~ are you kidding me, Poseidon? you had ONE JOB!!

~hacks away instead of harvesting the crop~ "NUUUUUUUU! I'm sorry eggplant. duck tape WHERE'S THE DUCT TAPE" T^T


Animal Crossing

~gets yelled at for being late~ "pshh story of my life."

~isn't popular enough~ "story of my life"

~cheats with codes to get everything in the game~ Suck it!!! HAHA


Skyrim

~guy stands in my way and tells me he took at arrow to the knee~ I'mma stick my arrow up your ass if you don't move.

~runs out of stamina~ "shouldn't have ate that sweet roll"

~jumps down mountain running from troll~ "Fuck" ~is smacked off mountain by troll~ "jkfba;fbaosfhga;fhga;egahf"


Left4dead

a slew unsavory vocabulary and psycho-talk I will leave to your imaginations :D

"Zombies can jump Booooiii!







​

 

[Laggy Lagiacrus]

Pokemon
"Come on, get in the ball you piece of- YES! YES! THANK ARCEUS!"
Alternatively...
"One click... two click... Three clicks... OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE."

Animal Crossing
"Remind me why I planted so many trees. Oh, right, money."
"God damn it, where the hell did [villager] get to?"

Megaman
"[Incoherent string of profanities]"

 

[Levusti]

There are only ever three words I say to my game.

"Oh my God."

But anyone knows how well/badly it's going by the rate I say them.

If I am about to die or am being chased like by zombies in Left 4 Dead, it's usually like, "Ohmigawdohmidgawdohmigawdohmigawd."

If I do something great is, "Ohhh. My. Gawwwww-awwwwwwd~"

 

[MattyIce]

I talk to all of my games, even though none of them can hear me. It's really bad when I'm playing a sports game and am yelling out strategy...although I do that with shooters. I typically will talk about whatever events are going on in the game world, such as wandering as an alchemist in skyrim picking up supplies "ooh, what's this...I need more of that...why am I so darn poor..." or playing Fallout and screaming at super mutants/ghouls/deathclaws to not hurt me and I'm really sorry to have encroached on their territory...they have yet to listen to me...