Overcoming Ignorance

[VerbalAbuse]

So like I'm not sure if any of you know this, but I was raised Conservative Baptist Christian by a racist, bible-beating mother, and a slightly better in those respects, yet slightly worse in all others father. I had known since I started school that racism was wrong. I always hated when my parents would say racial slurs and things. That was inherent, and only took learning about Martin Luther King Jr. and having a Hispanic best friend. However, I had been raised to hate anything that could be considered "queer" in any sense - atheists, gays, trans* folk, et cetera. I held these ingrained ideals to heart up until about Sophomore year in High School. Yes, for 15 years, I was a hateful fucking bastard that despised anything that wasn't like what I was taught.

I'd punch myself in the face.

So, sophomore year I achieve my first foray into acceptance. I had a best friend named Scott - a gay boy in my grade. He became my friend simply because of how accepting he was of me, and in turn, I learned to accept him. This guy became my bro, but sadly moved away my Junior year.

In comes the current love of my life. Shy, insecure, and devastated by social interaction. He was her at the time. I always thought she was cute. I instantly struck up a friendship with her because she seemed nice - on the eyes, ears, and in a conversation. A wonderful person.

Junior year. I'd done something severely stupid over the Summer that I'm not at liberty to divulge, but I just wanted to get my life started again. My closer friends were a communist patriot, a pair of gamers, and my current best friend, a strapping young black man by the name of Derrick Watson. A bit of a delinquent, but not as bad as I had been. Daft, but not stupid. He was always accepting of everything, from my poor choice, to my sense of music and humor. I got him into dancing, and he got into it more than I did.

On December 14th of last year, my current love told me she'd left her previous love and asked if I'd have her. Overcome with joy, I said yes. We had our first kiss at a culture festival on the 19th.

Now, late Junior year. He confessed to me that he was transgender. I was apparently one of if not the first he came out to. I accepted him with open arms. He had taught me a lot about acceptance, and I wasn't going to turn my back on him now. I had become what I had hated in the past - an androgynous, self-sexualizing young man in love with a boy. That's not even taking into account the fact that I'd bend Robert Downey Jr. over a table, but that's just because wow have you seen him

So there's no reason why people can't be accepting. There's no reason why someone can't become more than what they were raised to be. I'm more than my parents ever could add up to, and my mother will know when I have proposed to my boyfriend in June of 2015, that I might as well be gay, and I don't care if she accepts it or not, because I don't need her. All I need is my love and my true friends - the ones who won't question my acceptance. The one's who ask only once; "Are you okay with that?" and let it go when I say that I am.

Any of you have any extraordinary stories about rising from ignorance?

 

[Kooriryu]

At some point or another you may have used this familiar phrase - Blood is thicker than water. The context in which we use it is to describe the meaning that blood-related families are more important than anyone else. R' Richard Pustelniak, congregational leader for the Jewish community called House of Living Stones writes about this phrase. "This phrase has completely lost its original, covenant-related, meaning…The original meaning is, "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb," or, "My relationship with those to whom I am joined in covenant is to be considered of more value than the relationship with a brother with whom I may have shared the womb."

via http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermon...-pilgrim-sermon-on-blood-of-christ-133449.asp

 

[VerbalAbuse]

Absolutely glorious quotation. I take it more as meaning that I shouldn't have to earn my own family's love, only my friends, although there may be other, deeper interpretations.

 

[Zen]

I love this talk and if I can, I would love to read the book.

 

[LogicfromLogic]

I have one, though I am not sure how well I can tell it without sounding a bit dramatic or something but here it is.

I grew up in a rather ignorant god loving family, which I was constantly taken away by the state from. It was a weird situation, but I learned that to be my life. They were constantly fighting, and their bigotry was fierce. I started out as a 'she' because I was too afraid to come out to my family about being transgender. I knew that I was different at a young age; I was five when I realized that I hated being called girl. So, I stayed silent about it. Until my biological family found out about it when I was ten and sent me away with a church in hopes to change me in their views. I was rejected by the church, and fell on the streets. I was about twelve at the time, and I met a friend (this site ironically shared this bright young crazy fellow, but I will not speak his name here). We had a lot in common; he was a foster child, transgender, like me, and no family. At least not one that he could make himself proud of. We bummed around the streets like we owned the place, but we took different paths. He chose to run from his troubles and never face those who held prejudice against him, I did. He had a daughter, and he said that she didn't need the family's hate. Made enough sense but he was still running from the problems that would always be with him.

I turned and faced by over religious hateful family. They refuse to acknowledge me, some even said that I had died. 'Shot myself because I could not see 'God's light'. That is a joke I'll never forget. But when I turned off the streets and headed home when I was seventeen, I faced my biological mother. I told her that I do not care that she does not see me as her son, and if I won't be her daughter I'll be dead. I stood up for myself after running. That must have changed her because now, while she still talks to the congress of baboons that like to occasionally call themselves a family, I know that I can't be taken down by them ever again.

One day I had the gall to ask why they thought that what I am would lead me down a path to 'hell', 'burning' and 'jail'? And you know what they said? Because their god has written it to be a sin and that I am abomination. They told me that I wasn't right in the head and have started treating my like I am retarded. That answered my question however; their hatred is an incurable disease that I refuse to leak into my bones. I have faced sheer ignorance from the community around me (including my so called bisexual older sister, which that in itself is hilarious) and my family, and quite a bit from my friends.

The best way to deal with ignorance is to either ignore it, or laugh at it.

 

[CrashAriMP5N2O]

I'm assuming the 3rd option actually states "The blessing of those who gave you [life] are a convenience, not a necessity." I feel it's more wholesome and realistic than simply stating that "We are greater than our blood." The life we are given by being born into this world is a gift to us. How we lead our lives is our gift in return. Now we all come from different environments and upbringing, and thus have an impact on us. However, choice is never taken away from us, even when it seems that isn't so. You will be exposed to many things in life as you grow up and you will come to question why things work the way they do and it is then you can reflect upon yourself and consider how you can integrate your experiences into your identity, and thus be quite different from how your initial upbringing and environment influence you in the beginning.

 

[Minibit]

I was also raised Christian, I 'accepted Jesus' at a young age because of fear of going to hell, and used to cry myself to sleep over the same fears of my atheist father doing so.

I quit the church in my teens and it am now an agnostic glbt ally. I try to see religion as something that helps people stay moral , and have no problem so long as they don't force their antiquated, racial, anti-feminist, fearmongering views on others.

Trouble is 'evangelism' or the sharing of your belief in attempts to convert others, is a big part of Christianity, and because of the eternal-punishment fearmongering, they honestly believe they're doing you a favour.

When I have kids, I want them to examine all religions as well as atheism and agnosticism objectively. I refuse to fear people into anything. Above all I just want my kids to uphold the basic morals of treating everyone with respect, regardless of class, colour , belief, or sexual preference. If they can find a religion that they can practice while doing that, I'll be ok with it

I wish I was raised with religion as a choice and not a moral default, and I hope as our society becomes more accepting and inclusive, that more people will be

 

[CrashAriMP5N2O]

Trouble is 'evangelism' or the sharing of your belief in attempts to convert others, is a big part of Christianity, and because of the eternal-punishment fearmongering, they honestly believe they're doing you a favour.

I agree with you there. It's a shame though because as a Catholic, there are great things associated with nurturing one's spirituality. I also keep an open mind towards those of other faiths as well as those who do not have them. I think the different religions are just different avenues of expressing one's spirituality. I agree with the teaching of my religion but I am not a zealot or in another time and place, I wouldn't resort to being a Crusader. I am especially pleased with institutions who do not go out of their way to try to coerce people into joining their faith. Like all other things in the world, practitioners of religion have their flaws and they end up manifesting into some shameful products (i.e. extremists). Still there is the sincere aspect that make for the wholesomeness of life. That is what it is to be human.

 

[Lady Sabine]

I was actually raised by very tolerant and understanding family. I have a lot of respect for people who are able to overcome bigotry and hatred- mostly because I've never had to test myself. There isn't a single group of people (excluding, maybe, Parisians) who I have any sort of prejudice towards, and sometimes I wonder if I'm really tolerant, or if I just haven't ever had a real taste of hate. You'd be hard pressed to name a minority I didn't spend time around as a kid, or at least learn about from my parents in a factual way... I never really had a chance to dislike people, since I understood that one day I'd be expected to interact with them like a civilized human being.
I suppose being raised atheist might have helped with this, but from what I've seen, more people use religion as an excuse for bigotry than as a cause. I wish more parents would raise their children as free citizens of the world instead of slaves to tradition. :c