My Little toasty died...

[Maddeline]

My good friend Logan died yesterday...he was a sweet boy. Very smart, smarter than me.

I was showering when my parents came up the stairs and told me, it's the first time they've been together since the divorce...

Logan went home on January 26th and blew his brains out, no one knows why...he didn't leave a note or anything, he just went home and committed suicide after having a good conversation with me that morning at school...his Xbox was on, and his dad was asleep in the otherroom with earmittons on...his mom discovered him an hour or so later...
He was a brilliant boy and I am going to greatly miss him...

If enough people are interested, there is a donation site set up to help pay for his funeral costs...

Edit: this is the link. 100% of the proceeds go towards the American foundation for suicide prevention: http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.personalCampaign&participantID=723051

 

[Space Cowboy]

I'm so sorry to hear that.

You, his friends and family, have my deepest condolences.

 

[Maddeline]

Thank you...it means a lot :(

 

[Rare]

Hey when you talked to him, did he seem alright? He must of been going to a tough time in his life.

Do you know why he would kill his self?

Sorry, if I am going too deep, I just want to help you out. Since, he is your friend and you were the last person that he talked to.

 

[Thought Manifest]

I can tell you from experience that it's really easy to miss the signs that someone is suicidal, especially on the day they've decided to take their own lives. My older brother committed suicide when I was fifteen, and on the day he died, we all thought he was having a good day. We knew he was suicidal. Just a week before, he'd checked out of a place where he'd gone because he'd been trying to get help for it. The day he died, he was pleasant and seemed upbeat. We thought things were looking up for him. I think he'd really just made his peace with his decision and was giving us one last, pleasant memory of him.

I'm so sorry that you've lost your friend, and I hope you'll be alright. If you need to talk one-on-one about it at all, I'm here for you. Our experiences may not be exactly the same, but the pain of loss isn't entirely unique to only exact situations and exact circumstances.

 

[Kestrel]

My condolences. I wish you and the family strength for the times ahead.

I can only echo @Thought Manifest in terms of signs, but would like to add to urge you not to feel guilt. I don't know your situation, but those close to a person often blame their selves for their lack of action or awareness. From your story, if your friend had that conversation with you I believe they don't attribute any of their depression to your actions. So should you burden a sense of guilt, please try to consider this, and that your friend tried to shelter you; which can only be considered to be an act of love.

Unlike certain others, I'd like to advice against digging for reasons. Especially so recently after your loss. It's important to achieve stability before undertaking such a thing, if you'd consider such a thing at all. Why is a question that is often difficult or even impossible to comprehend the answer to.

 

[Maddeline]

It's okay if you all ask- as far as we know, he was only depressed from lack of companionship :(

But I really appreciate the condolences, I mean that

 

[Maddeline]

The donation is at twenty one hundred

 

[Esthalia]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss and my thoughts will remain with you and his family.

 

[Santario]

I lost my mother to suicide. It will be one year on the 25th of February. I too can confirm that you cannot always tell when it is going to happen especially on the day they are set to do it. My mother in particular was laughing and telling jokes talking about how she wanted to get back into her plants again and about how much she was loving life again. I was on the phone with her while she was in the act, but of course I had no idea she was swallowing doses of pills. Her last words to me were "Honey I'm really tired now and need a nap. I love you, never forget that." Part of me should have guessed because my mom has always been suicidal all of her life, but it just goes to show that you cannot always know.

You and those affected have my deepest condolences and of course if you need someone to talk to please feel free to pm me. Just know you can not harbor any guilt in you because if they are truly committed there is such a slim chance to stop it.

 

[Maddeline]

We found out with some private information that he had been switched to a new anti-depressant but didn't want to be stuck at the hospital for a few weeks of observation...I no longer feel like a bad friend now that I can blame a medicine and not myself for letting Toasty die :(

 

[Maddeline]

We lined his casket with his favorite DnD dice. His head was deflated and they had everything behind his cheek bone covered in a sheet

 

[Santario]

I am sure he would have like that.