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LOL~ Okay, okay~ In my high school there was an Asian chick who was known to masterbate in the boy's bathroom. I myself have never seen it happen, only that she exists, because I've met her. Never asked her about the rumors, though.
One day, I was in the side of the building where I have never had classes before. I asked my friend where the the girl's bathroom was, he pointed in a generic direction, and because I really needed to go badly, I went into the first bathroom I saw and headed straight for the potty.
When I came out of the stall, there was a guy standing in front of an upright urinal peeing into it. He turned around and was like 'OMG, you are that girl, aren't you?'.
I bolted out of there, and on the way out, I saw 2 girls that had been standing across from the bathroom looking at me and giggling T-T
Til this day, I am still embarrassed about that day XD
-Edit-: P.S. I went to high school in the US XD So... Not everyone was Asian hahaha~~
I think every day of my life turns out into some kind of absolutely ridiculous embarrassment.
If you were nearly as clumsy as me, you'd understand. XD
But the first thing always comes to mind, is an elementary school memory. We often played dodgeball. I loved it because it involved high-speed running and acrobatic dodging. Unfortunately though, on this particular turn I launched an awesome kick that gave me enough time to run to second and decide to steal third, momentarily distracted by the fact that the opponent at the third base was my crush at the time. He caught the ball and started to run back to his plate at the same time I was reaching it. He came from the other side trying to tag me, but I hit the plate first, sliding. He came at me so fast with the ball that he managed to somersault over my back and we landed in a tangled mess. The teacher was like, "Uhh....Safe!?" But I was so embarrassed.
The whole class started laughing and I just laughed along, but I can still feel the heat in my cheeks! Haha!
There was also that time in middle school when I was supposed to climb the stage to get my spelling bee medal and managed to trip over the carpeting they'd set up. The stage was actually a bunch of high-rise large wooden-table-style things put together to make a platform. So when I tripped, I pulled the carpet along with my foot, causing one of the stage squares to move backwards, creating a gap between that one and next one. So when I took the next step to steady myself, I ended up falling through the gap, taking the carpet with me.
I'd have to say my most embarrassing moment was this time I was 16 during the summer. I had gone swimming with some friends at a beach. While out in the water, the very cliche happened and my trunks got lost. It happens... and I was even scrawnier then than I am now... anyway, they must have washed away by the current because I could NOT find them anywhere.
Luckily, my friend with a permit to drive was nice enough to volunteer to drive himself back home and get me a new pair to use so I could leave. We weren't exactly close by where we lived so he was gone for a good 40 minutes, while I did my best to avoid everyone possible and keep myself deep in the water with only my head sticking out. Thankfully he wasn't an asshole and ditched me, he came back, slid me the trunks under the water and we promptly left. I never want to be that embarrassed again.
My most embarrassing moment I can think of was I got into a fight with my German teacher in the middle of class... It was about what day it was too >.<
She was gone for one day, and we had a project due the next day. Only my internal clock was thrown off somehow so I was thinking I still had another day to get it done. I hadn't started it at all because I was 'brain dead' on an idea. We had to make a monster and label all the parts of the body in German.
Well when she came back, she told us it was due at the end of class. And being how I was back one day mentally, I raised my hand and said it was yesterday's date. The argument lasted for like 10 minutes before she finally convinced me the real date.
Oh God I was so embarrassed. Everyone was whispering and giggling at me as I hastily drew up a monster and label all the parts. I'm sure my face was red from it all too. That happened only last year.
OK … this goes way, way, way back to 7th grade. Really deep-seated stuff.
Not really, actually, compared to what other people have posted! O_O Glad we can all laugh about it now!
Anyway, we did poetry recitation presentations in class. I recited Maya Angelou's famous "Still I Rise", which, in my defense, was assigned to me. It went pretty well until I reached the awkward verse:
Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?
I was like 13 and not exactly what you could call confident in my sexuality. Especially because my crush was sitting in the front row staring at me. I managed the first line all right – "Does my sexiness upset you?" I proclaimed to the class, not a little uncomfortably, but still maintaining a performing aura, keeping my voice relatively steady.
My crush interjected loudly, "No."
I don't think I've ever been so mortified. I stuttered out the next word, "Do-Does," and then just kind of froze staring at him in front of the entire class. The teacher was glaring at him but I just wanted to melt into the earth and be gone. To my credit I did read the poem to the very end, including those next touchy lines, which were extremely disconcerting in light of what had just happened, but ... I haven't ever really gotten over that!
HAHAHA oh god, I was at that curious stage in my preteen years. Found my first bit of porn on new ground and decided this was a great idea to watch it at the library. (They had screen covers for privacy reasons) So put on the head phones, turned up the volume and click the link. The woman next to me gives me a weird smile, I smile back and roll my eyes. She vanishes and I take off my head phones to look around. Turns out she could hear what I thought only I could hear.
That's the funniest one off the top of my head. Good old childhood.
It was back when I got my tongue pierced. I was in this really busy tattoo shop and they told me afterwards I couldn't have dairy products. So the foxmaiden thinks to self what about biscuits I love biscuits....They are made with milk. So without thinking I said overly loud to my friend is bread dairy...She burst out laughing along with everyone in the parlor... And I stood there stupidly yelling "What's so funny...I don't get it. Seriously is bread dairy." Everyone got a giggle till a old lady yelled back its a Carb! I felt like a ditzy...
I was just about to go swimming in my friend's back yard. That's all cool and junk but my crush, Kody Woods, and his twin brother Kyle were swimming to. So I wanted to mentally prep myself for what may happen in that pool. So, while the others were outside sitting by the pool waiting on me, I was in the bathroom hyperventilating in the mirror. Typical Ili.
After I think I got myself straightened out, I took a deepDEEP breath and walked out of the bathroom and into the living that leads to the back door. That's all fine and dandy...until I heard something on TV. Turns out, Music Choice was set on 'Oldies' and all I heard was the steady guitar of Michael Jackson's 'Beat It.' All hell broke loose from there. You cant keep Iliana from her MJ, so I jumped on top of the couch, whipped out an air guitar and started SHREDDING MAD LICKS. The riff stopped, only so Michael could sing. AND SING I DID. I brought out the air mic and...
"THEY TOLD YOU DON'T YOU EVER COME AROUND HERE! DON'T WANNA SEE YOUR FACE YOU BETTAH DISAPPEAR! THERE'S FIRE IN THEIR EYES,
BUT THEIR WORDS ARE REALLY CLEAR, SO BEAT IT...JUST BEAT IT."
I hit all of the notes right, as expected, and the singing continued. Until I heard this tap-tap-tap-tap sound. My assumption? The song was being remixed. So...
"REEEEEMIIIIIX!" Iliana went AT it! Until the taps became off beat, and I was confused. The sound was coming from behind me, and when I turned around, yep: Kody Woods is tapping through the window at me, laughing his ass off. I was in mid-strum on my air guitar when he did. *sigh* I've never been the same in his eyes. Damn my inner Michael.
I have said "I am a stegosaurus" for no good resaaon, other than my friend and I were quoting various videos. As it turns out, my voice was louder than I'd hoped. The teacher responded with "No, you are silly person, now get on with your work."
Oh god, I have to pick which one I want to tell...
Ok, here we go.
This happened while I was on my first date with my now-boyfriend of seven months.
I was was pissed off and upset about my family and about a close friend who had royally pissed me off when I realized that I was going to spend the night over at my friend's and then realized that she had work in the morning- therefore, I couldn't be staying at her house, could I?
"Oh, don't worry, you're spending the night at Andrew's." She responded. Her then boyfriend.
I made some hasty question of the fact that she trusted us alone together- girls don't trust me with their boyfriends often.
She said it was fine, as long as I kept calm.
By the end of the night, Andrew and I were chilling with Justin and I asked for a beer.
And then another....
and then another.
He said he kept giving me drinks because he wanted to see when I'd stop slamming them down.
He figured out not to give me alcohol anymore after I bit him seven times- severely, leaving marks- because in my drunken state, I thought he was going to try to cal me down, and I was hyper. I then stripped down to just my underwear and ran around his entire house- his mother slept through this.
It took him and my now boyfriend to wrestle me back into the room, and then Andrew found out that Justin managed to keep me calm, he decided at that point that Justin was staying over to deal with me.
In the morning, dealing with a small buzz, and hyped up on past-sex energy from the night before, I snuck into Andrew's room, meaning to say good morning, but as I poked him, I croaked out "We had sex".
I thought i was mortified.
Then he shot up and stared at me before looking like he had seen a ghost and muttered. "Stevie's gonna fucking kill me"
It took me an hour to explain that I didn't have sex with him, and then five hours later, Justin found us laughing our asses off about it.
So in summary:
Got drunk, attacked friend's boyfrend, had to have a guy stay in the room with me because I wouldn't calm the hell down, or would attack the boyfriend, ended up having sex when sobered up, then the next morning- accidentally spilled the beans and the girl's boyfriend misunderstood and thought we had sex.
To this day, Andrew keeps me around as someone he counts on to keep things interesting.