B
Brainess
Guest
Original poster
I have been asked to do a Petrarchan sonnet and a lyric poem but I'm very very terrible at poetry (all those rhyming and meters blah!). I just finished making it and I'm not confident so I need help before I give it over...
Sonnet
???
Somewhere deep, dark, and cold, I cower
Somewhere deep, dark and cold, she follows
She whispers and laughs; her voice echoes
I hide and run, but I have no enough power
The words she throws are sweets and flowers
Yet they pierce you as painful as arrows
You've always been with me, high and low
But I wish you be sweep away like an ember
I wish to end this and be drowned in silence
But we're ribbons; we're each other's bane
We're puppets; we speak what you speak
We're different but share the same appearance
I stare at my own reflection in pain
As I muffle my own cries and shrieks
Lyric poem
The sea (I love)?/???
Here I stand in the sea shore to watch the sun set
I see the sea and the sky together
Like how the stars appear every night to gather
I wish we could have the time be reset
So we could capture everything in a cassette
Before everything flies like a feather
I close my eyes and feel the wind in my face
It reminds me of your soft caress
That always makes my heart race
The warmth of the sea reminds me of your embrace
That always makes me feel safe
I open my eyes to see the sun gone
Just like when you said we were done
The sting of the sea reminds me of my heartache
When I am awake
And know you are gone
I'm in 9th grade. If you were my English teacher, what would you give me out of 10? 1 - very bad to 10 - perfect
Sonnet
???
Somewhere deep, dark, and cold, I cower
Somewhere deep, dark and cold, she follows
She whispers and laughs; her voice echoes
I hide and run, but I have no enough power
The words she throws are sweets and flowers
Yet they pierce you as painful as arrows
You've always been with me, high and low
But I wish you be sweep away like an ember
I wish to end this and be drowned in silence
But we're ribbons; we're each other's bane
We're puppets; we speak what you speak
We're different but share the same appearance
I stare at my own reflection in pain
As I muffle my own cries and shrieks
Lyric poem
The sea (I love)?/???
Here I stand in the sea shore to watch the sun set
I see the sea and the sky together
Like how the stars appear every night to gather
I wish we could have the time be reset
So we could capture everything in a cassette
Before everything flies like a feather
I close my eyes and feel the wind in my face
It reminds me of your soft caress
That always makes my heart race
The warmth of the sea reminds me of your embrace
That always makes me feel safe
I open my eyes to see the sun gone
Just like when you said we were done
The sting of the sea reminds me of my heartache
When I am awake
And know you are gone
I'm in 9th grade. If you were my English teacher, what would you give me out of 10? 1 - very bad to 10 - perfect