High Seas and Short People [Private]

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The first shout was lost in the flurry of movement and noise on deck as everyone secured the rigging...or didn't, as the case was. They didn't want any wind in their sails pushing them about. They rolled up the sail and tied down the lines and then went about securing the cargo hold and making sure nothing was damaged or messy. Her second shout, though, caught their attention and they all froze. Durok, who was trying to avoid a panic or too many questions rolled his eyes and hopped bodily off the forecastle, landing at the foot of the stairs leading up, and pulled open the door to the below-decks just as she was coming up the stairs.

Basically, she'd be screaming, racing down the hall and up the stairs, only to find the door torn open by the massive orc and his imposing shadow falling on her, silhouetting him like some sort of behemoth made of nightmares and rage. However, he raised a hand in front of her and gave a simple command, gentle but firm. "Quiet, Miss Bertie." He waited for some manner of quiet, and was even poised to grab her if she fell or lost her balance or any such thing (he figured out too lte that jumping out in front of an incensed, land-lubbing gnome as she raced up stairs may not have been the best course), then said "Carrn is getting Haseel, boy who fell during storm. He is okay, and no shark gon' bother him, see?"
 
The sudden orc shadow looming over her caused her to jump, stiff as a board, as all of her hair stood up on end-- well, it would have if her luscious dark locks were not still clamped tightly in curlers. As it was, the rollers only clanked and clacked against themselves at her jump and her arm hairs had to pick up the slack. Bertie slammed a hand against her chest as if to restart her heart.

"Gracious me! You--"

"Quiet, Miss Bertie," the orc requested. Thorberta moved her hand from where it clutched her tunic to her mouth. Wide eyes regarded the orc, as clueless the second he stopped explaining things as they had been before he'd even started. What?!? The dwarf was performing a rescue mission with a harness? And... whatever else he'd jumped down with. And she'd seen a shark! It had been right there! Right with him!

"But--but I saw the fin!" Thorberta exclaimed, careful to keep her voice to a harsh whisper. Well, as much of a whisper as gnomes can muster and that's not saying very much. Suffice it to say, she at least was not shouting. "A shark fin! In the water with him! How can you be so sure it won't get him? I SAW it!"
 
He had indeed startled her, but Durok refused to let it bother him too much. He simply waited for her to settle, then she began whispering rapidly at him. Once again, he raised a hand and said "Aye. Mayhaps there be sharks. But look me face, Miss Bertie. Would Durok lie?" He paused, giving her a moment to scan his face. Yes, it was brutish and powerful, with jagged tusks sticking up from his bottom lip and a turned up nose that gave him a piggish appearance. Yes it was covered in scars. Yes, one of his eyes was a completely different color and shape (the iris was slitted, like cats). His ears were pointed and his brow was furrowed in a permanent scowl. All that was true. He was an orc, obviously, no doubt about it...but his expression was honest and true, and in the few days they'd been aboard together Bertie had never seen him be unfair, unjustly angry, or dishonest. Despite the vicious, intimidating expression, he still had an air of respectability and integrity rarely found in these days.

After a few moments of silence, Durok then continued to speak. "Durok telling true, miss. Carrn is fine. No shark gon' mess with him." A slight smile lightened his features, and he said "Asides, you've known Carrn a bit now. Do think shark mean enough to take Carrn down? Dwarf'd punch the shark in nose and send it scurr'yin away. He done did that once you know. Twenty, twenty-five footer blue tip, hungry and all teeth, rushed him while fixin' the hull one day. Carrn drew back and wailed it on snoot, and shark done did spin tail and run." He then reached out and patted the tiny woman on the head, and said "Now, you done get finished yer beauty rest, and come see captain. We need all hands now, and he got a few jobs for you and you'se fancy quill."
 
To be true, Bertie knew from her experiences with her characters that if someone ever asked to be trusted in the way Durok asked her if she could trust him, they were likely to be quite untrustworthy. Sir Hildifrons never, ever trusted anyone who insisted they weren't liars. But what could the orc gain by being false? Nothing that the authoress could think of. She had no jewels to steal, no fortune he might benefit from, nothing to tempt him like the villains in her book. Oh well, she supposed she could trust him.

And then she couldn't help the vivid imaginations that overtook her when Durok recounted a tale with Carrn and a shark. Thorberta also couldn't help thinking that slugging a shark was one step away from batting a cannon ball. What a tough, old dwarf the shipwright must be! Yes, he could handle a shark. Whatever that dwarf was up to in the sea, he would frighten away any sharks that might find his harness a tasty morsel.

"You said the captain would like to see me?" she asked, her curiosity piqued. "I cannot imagine why he would need my pen, but I am always delighted to help! Is he in his cabin now? Yes? Excellent. I'll just be on my way, then!" Curlers still planted firmly in her hair, Thorberta rushed straight on to the captain's quarters to inquire what he might need her for.
 
When she rushed into the captain's quarters he let out a sharp yip and jumped, spinning in place and knocking over his armor stand with his thick, muscular tail. He'd been getting several books off of a shelf next to his desk, and they all toppled to the floor. When he saw the diminutive authoress he sighed in relief, then began to pick up his books. As he did so, he spoke.

"Ah, Miss Bertie! Fine job bailing out your room by the way." If he minded at all that she was dressed in her sleeping clothes and had curlers in her hair, he didn't show it. He'd heard her terrified screeching and figured she'd simply been a bit too excited to pay attention. "Now, I take it you're well rested? I have a rather big job for you." He hefted the journals onto his desk and took a seat, not even bothering to pick up his armor stand and rearrange the pieces of armor that had gone rumbling all over the floor.
 
At the captain's praises, Thorberta beamed and chuckled to herself, highly flattered and embarrassed at the same time to receive recognition for such a tedious task. Though, she had to admit, it did prove somewhat that she knew what she was doing. And if she knew what she was doing, then she obviously could look people, especially sailors, straight in the eye and tell them she wrote romances on the high seas. Her characters always bailed out lots of water. Sometimes for no reason at all. That was the trick with sailing adventures. When in doubt, have them bail water. Why, she'd barely gone two days before getting flooded with the nasty stuff!

But that was neither here nor there. The captain obviously had a task in mind for her and she wouldn't hesitate to state it might have something to do with those journals in his hand. "Quite rested, thank you, Captain. At least, as rested as one can be with the ship tossing and turning as it did last night. Wasn't that a horrid storm? I shall have to write about it in my next book!" Clasping her hands together in front of her, Bertie padded over to the desk and stepped up on tip-toe, not even bothering to pull the beautifully runged chair over to sit upon. "What is this job that requires my quill and ink pot, Captain? I am most intrigued!"
 
"Now, as the most literate and well-read among this crew, I need you to assist in double-checking our supplies. Suris and Loose-fist are below decks taking stock, but some of the crates have been busted open and damaged, some of our supplies have been compromised, and I need you to take these journals and catalog everything that is missing or unusable." He went on to explain which journal held which information, and gave her three of the books, and then said "I have some work to do making minor repairs around here, otherwise I'd handle it myself. Can I trust you with this, Miss Bertie?"
 
The big, powdery ball of self-confidence and pride --which had been swelling into an enormous size above her head-- poofed in an instant. Specks and pieces of her courage fluttered before her eyes and scattered around her bare toes. Of course, neither the ball nor the explosion could actually be seen, but as an authoress, Bertie had long ago learned to see such cartoonish happenings and incorporate those imageries into her books. Large eyes widened even more so as the captain continued to talk, then just about popped out of her head when he handed the journals to her!

What! Her? She could only fail in such a task! Bring utter ruin upon them all! This was real life and not one of her fantasies where she could scribble with a flick of her wrist, and then so-and-so did what was needed and saved everybody. She had to do it all herself! Oh no, if this was a big task, she would mess it all up! She was already forgetting everything he'd said about which book was which and what he wanted her to do with them!

But for some reason, her hands accepted the leather-bound books. Not only that, but her arms then brought them to her chest and strange words flew from her lips unbidden. "Why, of course I can, Captain! I'd be delighted to help with such a simple task." And then before she could protest and force her body into submission, it pivoted on her heel and marched her straight out the door! Her lips trembled and her brow knitted together as a whimper escaped from the back of her throat. Her whimpering turned into sniffles, and her sniffles turned into blubbering, and by the time her feet had carried her below deck into the storage compartment, tears as big as her fists rolled down her cheeks and splashed onto the book covers.

"But-but-bu-but I caaaaaaaaan't," Bertie sobbed. "I don-don-don't want toooooooooooo! I just want t-t-t-to sleeeeeeeep!"

The gnome stood there a good solid minute simply bawling her eyes out before she could get a grip on herself. Gradually, the wails turned into shuddery breaths and those in turn became hiccups. Thorberta rubbed her eyes with her fist and looked about her at the mountain of boxes and burlap sacks. One sack had slammed into a box corner and a huge gash ripped across its tummy, spilling its guts of rice onto the planks. That was one less bag of rice they could use. Bertie gasped for another good breath and set the journals down on the first crate her size to catalogue that.

Then by some miracle, she began to do just as she ought.
 
Sheng's very visible relief may have been lost on her, but he seemed quite thankful and said as much most quickly. But then she was quickly off, leaving the captain in his slightly-amiss office, and he quickly began to prepare. He replaced his armor upon its stand with his bare hands, preserving his magical strength as much as possible, then broke out his spell-book for a few quick recoveries of the intricacies of the necessary spells. Once done, he strode out on deck and made his way to the very center of the ship, where several of Carrn's more proficient apprentices had gathered. They began rattling off the locations of damaged hull and broken line, of cracked porthole and torn mast, and Sheng made note on a board with paper clipped to it.

What followed was almost two full hours of rapidly-flashing lizard feet as Sheng darted about, using minor cantrips and prepared spells to restore minor damages. The more complicated pieces would require Carrn's expert aid, but Sheng was in no way unable to patch things up. Once done, he moved about, helping to perform even more minor repairs that called not for magic but for the moving of cargo and lumber.

Meanwhile, Durok kept the boat in place with a skeleton crew that rushed about the rapidly-repairing seafarers, keeping undamaged sails and rudder in line so they did not venture far from where they had deposited a humanoid cargo in search of a lost crewman.

Below decks, no one noticed Bertie's sobs, so loud and arduous was their labor. But when she moved into light and caught the attention of a rather young mariner who had some kinship with the darker folk from across the sea, he moved to her and she'd recognize him from one evening in the galley as Suris. Close behind was Loose-fist, and the two pulled the young gnomish lady into their work.

It was difficult work, but she'd find time and time again that her work proved most valuable, especially when Suris stooped to grab a mop bucket and slop up as much of that contaminated and sea-soaked rice, and only a quick word from her would stop him from pouring it into uncontaminated sacks. Her sharp eyes saw a washed-in octopus among the stores that she'd recognize as poisonous from her few studies of actual sea-life. At that point, Shushanuu was fetched and he promptly tossed it out an open port-hole with his mop handle. And several other times in that afternoon and evening did her practical and occasionally obscure knowledge prove actually useful among the crewmembers she worked with. Towards the end of the evening, she'd find herself receiving many an appreciative nod and light pat on the shoulder (or head for those crew that towered far above her), and they were indeed light and familiar due to the quickly spread fact that Bertie was not hardened to the punches and smacks appropriate among sailors.

Then, exhausted, those working the repairs and stocks retired, since no work could be done properly by night or torch-light…
 
Somewhere between rescuing the workers from the toxic tentacles and discovering that the mint-infused oats were not, in fact, moldy, Thorberta found herself accepted fully as part of the crew. The gnome didn't know quite what to make of this sensation, feeling both above the crew in that she was a passenger and not a sailor, yet also wanting to be seen as a valuable member in their little family. For, family they were whether she would like it or not. They cared for each other, they laughed with each other, they fought together, and ate together. Bertie decided she rather liked the fact that they were a family.

As the last crate of pickles was checked off in the journal, Thorberta stashed her pen in her pocket and hurried out of the belly of the ship amidst the claps and clamours of the shipmates. By the time she made it back to the captain's quarters to return his books, she was practically beaming. What a good exercise this proved to be for repairing her confidence as well as their vessel! Bertie told the captain so and thanked him on behalf of the crew for all of their hard work in making sure the ship wouldn't collapse and leave her sputtering and splashing in the horrid, unpleasant water below.

Back in her haven of a bedchamber at last, the gnome crawled under the covers with a very satisfied sigh and curled up to sleep. Only... her mind would not let her drift off to the pleasant land of dreams. Carrn! He was still missing last time she heard. His gruff voice had been absent from the shouts on board all day and that felt all wrong, all so very wrong! Was he still in the water below? Had he drowned after all? Tossing back her covers, Bertie crawled to the porthole above her bed on her knees and forced it open. Sticking her head out, she squinted her eyes and peered down at the murky waves lapping against the ship. It was silly to think she'd be able to spot him after a full day down there. He had probably drifted off to Port Hulooga on the other side of the ocean by now.
 
Sheng's reply was a hearty, genuine laugh as he collapsed into his chair to go over the route and the lists that Bertie had put together. Unlike the rest of the crew, he had another hour or so of candle-lit work to accomplish, and the gnome's parting humor was most appreciated. She did seem so concerned about the ship failing so utterly, and he avoided mentioning that the majority of ship-failures had to do with minor irreparable damage that left them stranded until all were dead. In fact, it was quire rare for a ship to be entirely destroyed, and they only rapidly capsized in the most dire of circumstances. None of that mattered though, and he bid Bertie an amiable good-night and asked her to make sure the door latched on her way out.

So exhausted was the crew that the ship was quite silent. Normally, there was at least a few boisterous fellows filling the surrounding sea with quiet songs or gentle music, or sending their laughter to dance with the dolphins and the swells. But not so tonight. There was a kind, peaceful silence about the Bourbon Buzzard as all retired save the few needed to keep the ship from crashing or from leaving their missing crew far behind. In fact, of all on board the ship, only that handful were awake when a pair of figures arrived.

~~~

He didn't dare go further than thirty feet below the surface, as this far out the depths were FAR below and who knew what kind of beasts lurked down in those deeps. One small pod of dolphins got uppity and tried to assault him, but he batted them away easily enough. He was just out of range of the storm's effects on the waters at this depth, so he was able to move quickly through the water, following their own path using a combination of intuition, luck, and his own personal brand of pseudo-magical assistance.

Everything was secured in his pack, which was strapped tightly to the odd harness he'd fitted himself with. Minor enchantments made it shift slightly to fit better and it would NEVER come off unless he spoke a specific command in Common, which was impossible underwater and in his particular… situation. Still, he kept moving, hoping he'd find some sign. He filtered out all the other life: the fishes, the sea-birds stranded on the waves, the blue whale that got one good, echolocated look at him and fled for deeper water, and even a pair of humanoid figures that fled deeper as well...but he sensed no fear in their movements, so fear was perhaps not the right word.

But then, finally, he got a scent. His eyes dilated heavily and his slitted nostrils flared, and his fins propelled him on faster and faster, until finally he caught sight of the form with his powerful senses. The boy was bleeding and only the storm had kept other sea creatures from approaching and pulling him down deeper. He'd managed to hold onto something floating that had gone over with him, and he recognized it as he drew closer of a closed-tight-and-mostly-empty barrel. That wouldn't last much longer, Carrn was sure, so this certainly was some divine-blessed luck here. He shot surface-ward and breached next to the boy, giving him such a fright that Carrn heard a high-pitched scream barely drowned out by the thunder. But then Carrn was Carrn once again, and the boy's hysterics turned into complete confusion, and Carrn grabbed hold of the barrel and pulled the boy close so he could whisper in his ear.

It took five minutes. Carrn was surprised at how quickly and easily it had been, but clearly this next generation was less aggressively bigoted and fearful, so the boy slipped the ring on his middle finger, lashed himself to Carrn's harness, and they were off. The ring let the boy breathe and see underwater somewhat, so he acted as the navigator, using the compass, which Sheng had modified to always point in the direction of the ship. It had taken almost four hours to catch up to the boy, and now they were headed back and would make good time...hopefully.

Unfortunately, the boat had inevitably drifted off farther than intended, so they did not arrive until exceptionally late in the evening, and when Carrn surfaced and gave the boy his first breath of crisp, ocean air for the first time in almost half a day, he almost cried out...but Carrn's words urged him to silence. Instead, he simply waited, watching in awe as Carrn shifted once again in the inky darkness, and the young sailor watched fins turn to bulky arms and muscled legs. Soon, he was astride an equally strange creature that began to clamber up the side of the ship. Carrn huffed and hissed and wheezed while the youth clung to his harness and the great, black fin jutting up from the base of Carrn's neck, and soon they made their way over the edge of the railing and landed in a sopping wet sprawl on the deck of their beloved ship. Carrn wasted no time shifting into his dwarven form and unhooking the harness and pulling away from the boy, who was trying to untie himself from the many straps and buckles that had kept him from sliding away or grating the insides of his thighs to bloody meat.

What Carrn did not know was that he'd came up the side of the ship right next to Bertie's chambers. He'd arrived before she stuck her nose to the port-hole, but she'd catch a momentary glimpse of a hulking shape with some sort of a rider go sliding past her vantage point. It looked akin to the silhouette of a shark, but with great arms and legs instead of small fins, but the towering dorsal fin looked sharp enough to slice through the hull and the tail thick and powerful enough to knock over a building. The rider seemed to be hunched over and clutching a long sword (though that was , in reality, just a smaller fin sticking up from the base of the creature's tail and hips), but by the time she was able to respond Carrn was already on board and laying on the deck in his normal form.
 
What in the world was that?! Sharks didn't have legs, did they? Or did they actually have legs to go kicking around the ocean? But what about the fins she'd seen on other sharks in the aquarium attraction at the fair? Or were those abnormalities and this the real thing? Whatever this was. Wait, ARMS?! Sharks could CLIMB UP SHIPS?!?!? Heaven forbid! They were all going to die! Die from shark bite on board a ship! How absurd! How utterly foreign and unheard of! But, of course an authoress like herself deserved to die in an unprecedented, uncanny manner. What else was she good for?

Or was she dreaming? Possibly, possibly. Bertie couldn't remember falling over sideways and crashing onto her bed in a dead sleep, but then is one ever aware of such a thing? All she knew was that something scaled up the ship's side with someone kind of dangling off of it in the same harness thing she'd seen... No, it couldn't be the same contraption Carrn had strapped around him when she'd seen him jump overboard earlier today. Or could it be that this shark had eaten Carrn and taken it for itself and this was a horrid, horrible dream! Yes, yes that had to be it.

Her thoughts flew so rapidly around her brain, zinging here and zipping there, that this conclusion was reached even before the shark-monster-thing had climbed half-way up the ship. Thorberta raised pudgy fists to her eyes, rubbed them furiously, and opened them in an owl-like stare. This whole process took just as long as her panicked thoughts had, and by the time the floating specks in her vision subsided, there was no animal nor person strapped to it. No harness. No Carrn. Just an empty, solitary night.

Phew!

This time, the gnome did tumble sideways upon her bed; her head barely touched the pillow before her cabin erupted in well-earned snores. She would ask about Carrn in the morning. Or have her sleep interrupted again by some other emergency. Whatever happened first. But seeing as she was currently dead to the world, Bertie really didn't much care.
 
When on deck, the guard on watch turned slightly and saw them both, giving a sharp, confused cry of alarm. His spear came up, but Carrn just glared and the other newcomer grinned sheepishly and returned to watch duty, breathing a sigh of relief. Carrn then reached down and hefted the youth to his feet, and helped him undo the harness. The dwarf draped it over his arm, took the compass and ring back, and pushed the boy towards the captain's quarters.

They both strode inside, and a light flared to life inside the large room at the back of the Bourbon Buzzard.

~~~

The next day was a surprise. When the crew rose to find their missing member asleep in his bunk and Carrn's sonorous snores echoing about, they gave a cry of relief and pleasure. They slapped the boy on the back and got him to the galley, where they had a rousing celebration of his return. When asked what happened, the youth explained that he remembered little, only that he'd clung to a piece of debris, Carrn had shown up, and used some magic to get them back. They accepted it as truth, since most of them had seen what the Captain could accomplish with his magic the previous day, and many had met wizards, clerics, and other spellcasters that could accomplish these things easily. The boy was not expected to return to duty that day, and he used that day to rest and contemplate the truth of his rescue.

Carrn was also not expected to return to work just yet, but he woke up and jumped on the deck and started barking orders immediately. Durok let out a cry of happiness and pulled the dwarf into a tight embrace, lifting the far smaller humanoid clear off the deck while those on board stared in awe, but Durok cared little. He placed the Dwarf down...then launched into a gruff explanation of how hard it was to control these louts without Carrn there to head-butt them in the knees. The two shared another chuckle, but the moment passed quickly and now both were shouting, getting the crew to work once again.

Durok got them sailing for their next port immediately, while Carrn got a detail together to work on the harder and more complicated repairs that Sheng couldn't fix without him.
 
Thorberta woke bright and cheery the next morning, her dream from the night before only a mere tingling in the back of her mind. Though it was relatively early for her to get out of bed, the gnome soon discovered upon stumbling out of her bedchambers that it was not actually that early at all. The majority of the crew had already dined and rushed off to start their day's work in the amount of time it had taken her to unpin her hair [Funny, she couldn't remember putting in her curlers last night] and ease into a pair of faded trousers and a light, long-sleeved blouse and vest. Her notepad slipped snuggly into a side pocket of the vest and her pen tucked behind her ear. Off she scurried to the galley, just in time to sneak out a bowl and mug for the scrapings of the pot before the cook whisked it away. Bertie flashed him a grateful smile, certain that the glint in the corner of his hard eye meant he'd taken his time about cleaning up from the morning rush just for her.

Once she filled her tummy with food, Bertie deposited her dishes in the tub with the others and hurried topside to begin her inquiries for the day:

Sharks.

Chiefly, what they looked like and if any of the crew ever experienced a shark bite. Or an attack. Or if they'd ever had nightmares about sharks having arms and legs and climbing up ship ladders to eat unsuspecting crew members. Whether the latter was possible or not, the authoress was quite determined to make such a character a villain in her next Hildifrons adventure novel. Hence her need for information.

After wading through a few plausible stories, a few not so plausible stories, and a few outrageous-even-Bertie-couldn't-believe-them stories, she ran into Carrn. The gnome politely waited for him to cease his bellowing before interrogating him, even though it took him a good few minutes to realize she was there and wanting to speak to him.

"I'm sorry to trouble you..." Thorberta began as soon as she'd wrested his attention. Immediately, though, she bit her lip and took back her words in a more frank approach. "Well, actually, I'm not sorry at all to bother you. I have a few questions about sharks, you see, and after swimming around yesterday, I am pretty sure you have the answers I am looking for!"
 
She was asking around about sharks, which wasn't a particularly odd thing to do. In fact, some of the crew were surprised it had taken this long, and had practiced tales about sharks that were meant to terrify her, but instead they seemed to just make her pen rattle faster and her expression grow more intrigued.

One detailed an account about a shark big enough to swallow a boat whole. One told of sharks that swam through sand as easily as water and ate people lazy enough to camp on the beach. She heard of half-shark people like mermaids but carnivorous, who would throw harpoons and pull people into the water. She heard accounts of mundane shark attacks in shallow waters, and what it was like to be on a rowboat in the midst of the ocean with nothing but sharks for company.

Most of the tales were fake, some were true. Some of the true ones were told in such a way as to make them unbelievable, but were still true. In all, she had plenty of accounts of fantastic shark-related tails, but little else. When she walked up to Carrn and got his attention, he turned to eye her curiously. For some reason, he'd expected more of a reaction from her when she learned that he'd returned, and felt a moment of disappointment that he quickly buried under dwarven platitudes about being stoic and in control and how ridiculous that was.

But then she asked him about sharks, insinuated that he knew something about them, and an observant person would be able to see the subtle shift in his posture and expression. His eyes narrowed slightly and one hand clenched into a fist, and the other started to move up towards her. The instinctual defensive response to grab her, drive a fist into her throat, and throw her overboard welled up before he again realized that it was a ridiculous notion. Even if she DID know, she wasn't a hunter, and couldn't harm him if she tried. So, instead of grabbing her by the neck he instead pointed off to the side, out of the way of the bustle, and said "Fine, lass, you can ask your questions over there. Meet me there in five minutes." he then turned away and started bellowing away, giving last minute instructions and putting one of the others in charge while he was off. As he walked backwards towards the far corner of the deck, half-obscured by the thick ladder and wedged-open door leading below decks, he was shouting about how much he was going to hurt all aboard if anything wasn't done properly.

Then he was there and he rounded on her and said "So, what questions have you got, birdie?"
 
It had never occurred to the gnome to be surprised to see the shipwright. Durok had practically promised her she would see him again, and sooner rather than later. He'd even let slip that Carrn had had an encounter with one of the massive predators [sharks were predators, weren't they?] and survived to tell the tale. From that moment on, she had decided to believe the orc and not worry about the dwarf swimming around in the big, blue sea with his strange contraption... that is until she'd witnessed that strange phenomenon last night with the quadruped shark.

Now, of all the crew members, Thorberta had expected Carrn to be the most animated and most informative about sharks. Well, not exactly animated-- as the gruff dwarf never seemed to have any other expression besides "I'm going to bite your head off, I just haven't decided when"-- but eager to educate her on yet another sea-faring topic that she obviously had no clue about. The fact that his countenance changed from biting off heads sometime in the future to probably biting off heads in the nearer future only succeeded in baffling her. It also drew her curiosity. Carrn knew something about sharks. He'd punched one. He swam in an ocean full of them without fear. He was the only crew member to insist they go somewhere privately for their interview. The others had dropped whatever they were doing and pulled out as many ridiculous and terrifying tales as possible. They only pretended to listen to her questions as they were more interested in telling her their stories than answering anything she put forth.

Carrn, who had laughed at her romantical tales and took her seriously in her suggestion to bat incoming cannon balls with hammers, now acted like she had breeched a sacred topic. He actually wanted to hear and perhaps answer her questions. How intriguing!

And so it was with a clearly quizzical anticipation that Thorberta scurried over to the proposed corner of the ship when her five minutes of waiting were up. Pen and paper poised, large eyes widening by the second in her eagerness, the short, stubby gnome craned her neck as high as it would go in an attempt to meet the eyes of the shipwright-- who, in comparison, was only mildly taller than herself physically but his presence made him seem at least twice as tall.

"I want to know if some sharks have legs," she exclaimed at once, completely unabashedly. After all, this may be her only chance to get some real answers! "And if they can climb up ships. Durok told me you once punched a shark in the nose. Was that in the water or out of the water? Do most sharks have fins? And teeth? What colours are they generally? Have you ever seen a shark with limbs?"
 
The questions came bafflingly quickly. He had learned to expect that from her though, but he was in far less of a mood to pick through her questions and answer them one at a time. Her questions only put him more on edge as she asked about limbs and whether or not he'd punched the shark in or out of the water. The answer to all of those questions was yes (save the color one). But he wasn't about to just jump in and tell her that. And if she already knew, he had to pick out exactly what she knew, but tact was not Carrn's strong-point.

So, he decided to do the best that he could and give her the information without actually implicating himself. He let her pause for a moment, catch her breath, and then started to speak. "The answers to your questions are, in order, yes, yes, in the water, yes, yes, lots, and yes." he glanced out at the open ocean over the railing, and said "Lots of strange things are out there, lass. And I've seen my share." He turned to look back at her, still curious and a bit more hostile than he should have been, and then said "But any shark that can walk up onto this boat isn't going to. Has no reason to. And even if a shark DID happen to walk up onto it, you wouldn't have to worry about it. Magical beasts have more important things to worry about than a single ship wandering the ocean. Now, any other questions, lass?"
 
Thorberta's pen scribbled madly across the page as disjointed thoughts popped in here and there. His strange manner, the words he actually spoke, the knowing look in his eye, all of it added up into his answers. Carrn had a connection with sharks. It was obvious. He had to. It was the only way to explain everything. Perhaps he protected their secrets? He obviously knew a lot more than he was telling. She could feel it in the way he tight-lipped and gave her straight answers. Yes, yes, yes, yes. No embellishments, no tales, no questions of his own. And when he did say anything more, it was to correct her fears [which were probably written all over her wrinkled forehead] and not in relation to what she really wanted to know. Then the puzzle pieces began fitting in together.

Her pen dropped as her mouth gaped open.

It was obvious.

So unbelievably obvious.

Why hadn't she picked up on it before? The real answer. She'd seen it. She'd heard it. Carrn practically screamed it in his gruff manner. There was no other answer to explain his behaviour right now! Her astute observations never led her astray! Large eyes widened in an owl-like stare towards the shipwright.

"You had a shark lover!" the authoress accused before she could stop herself. Okay, she really needed to write this love story.
 
She was actually spot on. In fact, the shark he'd punched had been his lover, disguised in his own shark form and trying to scare Carrn. They'd gone their separate ways almost two decades ago. Still, the sudden accusation, spoken quite loudly and with as much confidence as she could muster, had him taken aback, and before he could get defensive, he was just startled. The accusation was so strange and absurd and unexpected, that he skipped straight over defensive and went straight to amused, and gave a long, drawn out bark of laughter. His chuckle fit lasted several seconds, which was several seconds longer than she'd ever seen him really laugh.

When his fit finally ended, he straightened up and reached out to elbow her in the arm that had been so affectionately claimed as the "Carrn only spot" and said "Yer an absolute delight, Birdie, you know that?" He never did deny the accusation, however, and continued by saying "But I have to get back to work. You keep spinnin' yer tales, lass, and if'n you have any more questions about sharks, you skip these louts and come straight to me."
 
For the rest of the day, Bertie couldn't get the sound of the dwarf's ringing laughter out of her head. It had been so completely unexpected, first of all. And second of all, for some reason it pleased her greatly that she-- and only she as far as she was aware of-- could elicit such a response from the bellowing, mostly cranky male. It delighted her and sent tingles down to her toes every time it rolled through her head like the waves. Thorberta needed to find the right words to describe it. Her next male lead needed a laugh like that. Gruff, but genuine. Belly-rumbling. Loud and obnoxious, but powerful enough to billow the sails.

She also happened to find herself smiling at nothing in particular quite a bit for the second reason mentioned earlier.

First, she needed to get Carrn's laugh on paper. Then she could worry about coming up with more questions to pester him with later. After all, he hadn't denied her accusation. How did one fall in love with a shark?

Bertie sat hunched over her writing pad on her bed, feet dangling over the side as they mindlessly bopped back and forth against the frame. Periodically she looked up to peer out the porthole for inspiration, but she did not leave her perch until her stomach growled and reminded her that the brain always works best after a proper meal. And so down she hopped, notepad stuffed into her vest pocket and pen balanced behind her ear, and trotted off to the galley to join the crew for a bite to eat.

---

Meal time was singularly uneventful despite the fact that many of the crew members felt the need to peer over her shoulder to see if their story made it into her notebook. A couple even offered new tales, to which Bertie shockingly declined to listen to. Her eyes were fixed on none other than Carrn.

How did one fall in love with a shark? And most importantly of all, how did a shark fall in love with him? She was bound and determined to find out and shuffled off to the captain's quarters soon after lunch. Who better to pry into Carrn's personal affairs than the reptilian gentleman?

"I'm sure you have heard about my interviewing earlier today," she began, cornering the captain at his desk. The gnome propped her notebook on the desk and stood up on tiptoe to be proper writing-length away. "Now, someone mentioned something very interesting about sharks and I figure you, of all people, are a reliable source. Can I trust you, Captain?" Bertie slipped her pen from behind her ear and licked the tip, her wide eyes completely serious and as demanding as she could look.
 
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