HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, NICK GRIFFIN!

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Grumpy, Mar 9, 2010.

  1. Natalia smiled at her friends and sipped her soda. Throughout the night she'd been bombarded by lecherous thoughts. Looking into Raven's head, it was nice to see something pure. "So..." she said carefully. "Any chance you could show me how to dance? I've never learned."

    Beside Natalia's head a smoky mist curled and formed into a little childlike man with pointed ears. He grinned at them, unseen by the three women enjoying their night out.

    "Fun and free be you three; girls playing at womanhood, dipping toes into the pool where not you should." He chuckled to himself and drifted to Raven, resting her head on her cleavage. "Your heart beats fast for the man with dark past. If no other excitement ahead, ye'll surely find it alone in your bed."

    He cackled again and drifted off, floating to get a look at all three of them, arms behind his head and little foot kicking lazily. "But woe with boredom is this little Puck! Against Flame and Stone, I'll see thee try thy luck! A test of sorts, for plans have I, for all of you when against evil you decry. Survive this, I think you will. But if ye not make haste, much blood thy will spill."

    ---

    MARCH 27, 2017
    HYDE PARK
    LONDON, ENGLAND

    The Puck materialized in the middle of Hyde Park, looking at each tree and blade of grass thoughtfully. Finally, he came upon the perfect evergreen tree and clapped his hands. He rubbed his palms together until a light began to form between them, and when he opened them a tiny flame appeared. He released it and it floated into the tree, where it promptly began burning it, the fire digging deep into the tree's core. The Puck then touched down onto the ground, walking upon the surface of the Earth for the first time in centuries. He raised his size 4 shoe and slammed it onto the soil sending a pulse of magic through it.

    The tree continued to burn, the fire reaching the core of the tree and spreading through its branches from the inside. It made dozens of sharp cracking sounds, an orange light cutting through the bark. The tree then burst open, turning to charcoal and ash almost instantly and leaving a forty-foot tall man-shaped fire in its wake. Its arms went past its knees, and its head was featureless fire with two glowing white eyes. It was pure fire, no solid form to speak of.

    The ground in front of where Puck had stepped split open, shaking like an earthquake. It set car alarms off all over the place. Then a huge piece lifted up. The area around it broke out of the ground in two arms, the spring grass covering the outer edges. Eventually a giant stone creature emerged, lacking any sort of face or head, and while it was shorter than the Fire Elemental at thirty feet, it was nearly twelve feet wide at the shoulders.

    "Spirit of Flame and Heart of Stone," The Puck addressed the titans, "ageless spirits from time alone. Welcome back to the mortal coil, to challenge magi three as their mystic foil. Elemental avatars, strike my friends, push them far!"

    The Elementals turned and started walking toward London proper. The fire elemental passed over a tree, setting it on fire as it went, while the earth elemental flattened a park bench with its stone foot.

    "If they fail, many bleed and many burn," he let out a devilish cackle. "But if they win, shalt be my turn."
     
  2. To be honest, when I saw this thread on the index, I thought it was wishing a belated birthday to Nick Crenshaw.

    I am now disappointed. Good job, Grumpster.
     
  3. WHO THE HELL'S NICK CRENSHAW.

    I COULD LOOK HIM UP ON WIKIPEDIA, BUT I'M TOO DRUNK LAZY.
     
  4. I'm amused now.
     
  5. who is the fat fucker?
     
  6. MEET NICK GRIFFIN, WMD.

    LEADER OF THE BRITISH NAZI NATIONAL PARTY, A NOTEABLE HOLOCAUST DENIER, ANTI-JEWISH, ANTI-MUSLIM, ANTI-BLACK, ANTI-ANYONE NOT BRITISH, AND ALL-ROUND MASSIVE COCKSUCKER.

    It was also his birthday recently.

    AND HE SHOULD THROW HIMSELF OFF THE NEAREST TALL BUILDING.

    PREFERABLY ONTO SOMETHING SHARP.
     
  7. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
     
  8. Grumpy, I always maintain that I never found a sober Scot when I was in Faslane.
     
  9. YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!9!!!!!
     
  10. *Joins TK*

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

    DIE NICK Crenshaw GRIFFIN