Girls, Girls, Girls

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Temet Nosce, Mar 31, 2015.

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  1. Let me get this out of the way - I love chasing girls. It doesn't even really matter if I get the girl at the end. I just figure that any teenage boy in the prime of his life has a moral responsibility to act irresponsibly and chase skirts, and I follow that moral creed to the best of my abilities.

    But to the part where I'm asking for advice. Basically, in a few months, I'm graduating. Which is fantastic since I'm pretty tired of the town I grew up in.

    But there is this girl that's about a year younger than me that I'm interested in. Shes an old sophomore, I'm a young senior. She's going to still be in high school when I graduate and move a pretty considerable distance. I'd be able to drop by on weekends and holidays most likely however.

    I've told myself multiple times that it isn't worth it, and I'm going to go crazy if there are hundreds of single ladies I can't flirt with but I would like to know Iwaku's opinion. I'm not a cheater, that type of stuff has really messed up my family and is the reason for a lot of trust issues.

    Should I go for this girl and let the dice fall where they may, or pull back the reigns and just force myself to sit out the next few months single?

    I feel bad because I already kind of broke her heart before because I started crushing on her pretty bad, and I forced myself to pull back and that kind of left her in an awkward position since she had mutual feelings. But the more we start talking again, the old feelings resurface and I can't help but have feelings for her again. I'm not going to say it's "love", since I'm not some idiot struggling with his first crush but we do definitely have chemistry. I'm just conflicted if I really want to restart things with her so late in the game.
  2. If you both like each other and want to go out together than I say give it a shot.
    Yes the distance might be a bit rough, but this isn't internet only long distance.
    You said yourself that you'd be able stop by on the weekends, which is plenty of time.
    And there are many online relationships where physical meet ups are insanely rare and they still work wonders.

    Like all relationships, there's a chance it might not work.
    But that is honestly something you're not going to know for sure until you try.
    And as long as you both remain decent and understanding to one another, any potential break-up shouldn't hurt that much.
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  3. We regret the choices we never made...go after her I say and see what happens.
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  4. Sit out the next few months. Unless you really think you can make the distance thing work.

    I'm biased on this because my past LDR didn't work out at all, but yeah. I've learned that if you dwell on someone who's miles away, you kind of miss out on life. I mean, you did say you'd be going back into town on weekends, but then you'd be missing potential parties, or even opportunities to hand with newfound friends.

    But anyways, that's my advice. Do with it what you will, good sir.
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  5. Moreso than distance, I think a consideration needs to be made that you'll be dating a high-schooler in college. That won't just be a physical distance, but distance in so, so many other ways. You're going to grow and change and experience so many things in so many ways she won't, most likely either you'll drift apart or you'll feel estranged from your college environment.

    It's your life, but I'd think pretty hard on that one.
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  6. I agree with Kestrel here.

    There is a level of emotional maturity that a large majority of high-schoolers aren't going to have in comparison to college-level or working adults. As you grow and expand beyond your own horizons of life as a high-schooler and prepare to enter into the real world (whatever the hell that is), she won't be able to follow you until she gets there.

    I admit to you I have seen this fail much more often than I have seen it work. I have limited anecdotes to pull from, but I've never seen it work.

    If you still want to try, of course, that's your own decision. But communication is going to be very, very important for you to actively stay a part of her life and for her to continue to be a part of yours even when you're not there with her. If that's something you're willing to do, sit her down and talk it out with her as best you can so that you can minimize the chance of either of you having a misunderstanding.

    Whatever you decide, best of luck. <3
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  7. Well, I've decided to just stay good friends with her and not pursue anything further. Partly due to the advice given here and partly due to how the last week has gone.

    Thanks to everyone that posted though!
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  8. Glad you found the solution that works best for you. :)
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