So, things have been rough for me for a while. Abuse, bullying, stalking, mental illness. It's one of those nights that are really common that I can't sleep because my head is turned on to danger, that my heart is pounding and I got tunnel vision. Man, the temptation to add a few more scars to the collection on my body. What sparked this tonight was when I was going home from the movies with my family on the train I noticed some people who knew me and I knew, not in a good way, previously mentioned stalkers. So they were glaring down at me and I was with my fifty something mother and my disabled sister and I was scared, I was so scared they would do something when we got off the train, do something to my family, my heart was pounding and my mind racing. But, nothing did happen, we got home alright and now, I'm set on and no way to shut off, I doubt I will tonight. Okay, so let me put all this into context, two years ago, I was the victim of a hate crime, due to my sexuality. So that left me... anxious. And I'm rambling. But this group, consisted of the youngest brother of the guy who assaulted me and well, his whole family has got a grudge against me.