Your Relationship Experience!

[Surrender To Hope]

I like to classify those lapses in judgment(two times), before my current relationship, trial runs because they gave me a chance to see whether or the individuals involved were interested in something meaningful or just a wham bam. It was the latter.

Now I'm with someone that desires something meaningful. By no means are we ready for marriage, we may never be and that's quite fine.

 

[Celestial Scorpio]

Ahahaha yeah... i wouldn't say I am experienced but I have experienced relationships.

I had a few non serious online relationships between the ages of 14-17 because well I wasn't out and I was not about to awkwardly ask guys if they were gay or interested in person.

I found someone online when I was 17 and they lived in my city. We dated for maybe three month's and met in person a few times. It wasn't really serious. After that I stayed single and once I turned 18 I had a few flings. Tried dating one or two guys but let's face it. I attract assholes for some odd reason.

Then after graduating I dated one guy. (Class of 2014) I quickly fell for him but well alas he was a douche, broke my heart and for months would come in and out randomly.

I dated somebody online in July last year. It was an ok relationship but it ended poorly. The person lied about their identity, said they lived in Japan, come to find out they live in a city 40 minutes away. Stalked me. Shit was scary. From then on I refuse to date online until I have gotten to know them, skyped with them and know they are being honest.

I have stayed single because I am only 19. I have priorities and love isn't one. I have a long time to meet someone. Although I have met someone who I'd like to date but well he lives in a different state, doesn't do long distance and I am sure he only see's me as a close friend. He is the only online exception since we have been friends for months.

Well I think I covered everything. In all honesty it's ok to not date or to be a virgin. I regret having sex because well I value it more now. Take your time and live life. Someone will come eventually.

 

[Shadon Xarian]

Some of ya have quite the stories. My tale isn't the most fun or dramatic, but still a tale non the less.

The closest to dating I've been in was back in elementary. Became friends with her when I was in first grade and she was in kindergarten , and been friends since. Although sometime in the middle of elementary, we both liked eachother, EVERYBODY knew it >.> (Her little brother and his friends were obnoxious about it) But at around middle school things started to change, what happened was she grew up faster than me (Fun fact, biologically, women grow up faster than men, or in other words, start puberty before men) So she's growing up, I'm still... Well me XD So our interest started to become different. So we took a loooooooong break from eachother (As in just sorta quit hanging out for a while) and 3 or so years ago we met up and were like "What the hell? Why did we quit? XD" So we got to talking, relived our quite hilarious childhood but then from that point we realized something (Or at least I did) our futures don't co-exist, our interest are completely different, we're just too different in all the right places to actually be together. And so we decided "Yeeeaaahhhh, let's just stay friends XP" (There was this stupid time where this song got me pumped and I thought "Alright, lets ask her out ^^" It was stupid of me, but happened regardless. She tried doing that thing to reject me easy so like 3 paragraphs later (She's an oddly fast typer) I was like "Guuurrrlll, I am the ONE guy in the world you don't have to explain yourself to XD I was being stupid XP"

I'm the kinda guy that likes to be friends first for a while, then become besties, and from besties, see if it gets further. If it doesn't, cool! We're still besties ^^ If it does, cool! You're mine now >:D And if something happens to where we break up, then no biggie, we'll still be besties ^^ (I like to think that I can't be broken up with on bad terms, and I'll try mah hardest not to be)

Now I have had my crushes and people I've basically rejected. And a few of those crushes are friends even to this day... But they're kinda taken >.< One of them is SUPER nice though not exactly sure how compatible we are (And we're not besties, we didn't hang out outside of class) and the other one... Well that's a story for another day XD (As in never, it's not bad/juvenile, but is a little chaotic to put into words, and I kinda wanna be vague just in case one of them somehow stops by o.o)

Now granted I'm not trying to find "The one" the first time, but i'm not the kinda person to treat dating like a game so i'm gonna try to make my first date "The one" the best I can. (Weather that elementary school "Dating" was actual dating or not is super debatable XD Personally, I'm not sure if I consider dating at that age "Actual" dating. If you do consider that dating, then I guess I'll try to make my second date "The one", but you get me point :D

 

[Surrender To Hope]

Pharaoh Shadon, I loved reading this.

 

[Slade]

I didn't date in highschool. I was the scary kid who came from the Ghetto and moved into the typical suburban neighborhood. I didn't make many friends and I had my own issues to deal with, frankly I wasn't ready for a relationship.

Then freshmen year of college happened and I started sleeping around, doing irresponsible things and such. My first few attempts at relationships ended in disaster with a lot of crying to friends and drinking a lot. I found out that if you're generally aimless in life it reflects in your attitude and how you act in romantic relationships. I focused on certain goals: transferred to a more respectable school, focused more on my career and generally didn't care about anything else. Things fell into place and I found a stable girl who could handle my eccentric and moody ass and helped keep me on my path whenever I strayed. She was always supportive of me and was a big positive in my life. I knew I had come pretty far because when we broke up, I didn't go crying to friends and drinking endlessly. I talked to a few friends calmly and took a walk to think about things. Though one time I tried to use one friend as a rebound, it was a shitty weak moment and I've always regretted. I'm happy she shot me down and called me out on it.

After that I just kept focused on my work and school and what was important. I slept around a few times but nothing extreme. A year later I started something with a girl who has been my friend for years, we're still together and its probably the healthiest relationship I've ever had, romantic or otherwise. I'm having coffee with her Father tomorrow and we'll most likely talk theology (he's a pastor).

The only advice I can really give is to never look for a relationship, you'll end up miserable or super clingy. Focus on yourself first and foremost.

 

[Shadon Xarian]

I like to classify those lapses in judgment(two times), before my current relationship, trial runs because they gave me a chance to see whether or the individuals involved were interested in something meaningful or just a wham bam. It was the latter.

Now I'm with someone that desires something meaningful. By no means are we ready for marriage, we may never be and that's quite fine.

Soo what do you classify in those lapses of judgement?


And if you don't mind revealing, what were those trial runs? O.o

Pharaoh Shadon, I loved reading this.

So did I :D I read it like 5 times before finally posting it XP (Though that coulda been trips down memory lane)

 

[RoranHawkins]

I have only dated once (and still am) and I got to know her through roleplaying on the roleplayerguild.

 

[Surrender To Hope]

Pharaoh Shadon,

I would classify them as my own stupidity to realize some people can't change unless they want to.

The trial runs involved dating two guys, arguably different in every aspect but having the same flaw in common: wanting to control everything of which included me. I call them trial ones because I had to weed through some very dark times(trying to change myself to please, etc) to see my worth and maintain the good relationship I have now.

 

[Shadon Xarian]

@Surrender To Hope
(For future reference, just saying someones name isn't actually tagging them, you gotta place an "@" at the beginning and then say their name. So like
@forum-member


So you dated two guys at the same time and made it a competition of sorts, the prize being you? Or you just simply date two guys, 1 at a time to get experience, and then go out with the guy you truly wanted to when you feel like you've gained enough experience from the other 2?

(I swear you're cutting off your sentences RIGHT before I get the point, Like your classification explaination sounds like a riddle to me XD)

 

[Surrender To Hope]

@Pharaoh Shadon

I dated two guys, at different times. The idea of dating two guys at once is not something I would consider or remotely do. It wasn't like a game when I dated them to get experience. I did so thinking something meaningful would come out of it. Isn't that why some people date? Whether casual or not. As for the person I'm with, it was a while before we got in a relationship. It didn't happen from me getting enough experience from the other two either. It was more like having an understanding what happened with those other two wouldn't happen again.

 

[Razilin]

<----Happily married.

 

[Shadon Xarian]

@Pharaoh Shadon

I dated two guys, at different times. The idea of dating two guys at once is not something I would consider or remotely do. It wasn't like a game when I dated them to get experience. I did so thinking something meaningful would come out of it. Isn't that why some people date? Whether casual or not. As for the person I'm with, it was a while before we got in a relationship. It didn't happen from me getting enough experience from the other two either. It was more like having an understanding what happened with those other two wouldn't happen again.

Then i'm kinda lost XP
First you said
"trial runs because they gave me a chance to see whether or the individuals involved were interested in something meaningful or just a wham bam."
So I wonder what those trials consist of, so I ask.
Then you say the trials were two people you dated before the guy you're with now, Which sounds you go through a few people as trial runs first, and then go for the guy you truly wanted.
See where my confusion comes from? XD


I think you meant trails are just test for your dates to see if they are in it for a real relationship or "Wham bam" (Like what you said... I think) But what I was curious about is, what are those trials that you put your dates through?

 

[Surrender To Hope]

@Pharaoh Shadon
You are thinking too much into it lol to where you are confusing yourself.

 

[Shadon Xarian]

@Pharaoh Shadon
You are thinking too much into it lol to where you are confusing yourself.

I guess so XP