Are you awake, son? Good. I'm Doctor Emmdee. There was an accident. Your face got cut off. One of your friends managed to get it on ice, but it was too far gone to reattach it by the time you got to the hospital. But there's good news! Even two years ago this would have doomed to live as a freak, enduring the horrified stares of adults and the screams of children anywhere you went, but several Hollywood actors have generously donated their likenesses to be used as faces for people who had accidents like yours.
Not to put too much pressure on you, but you need to hurry, if you want the surgery. The schedule fills up quickly this time of year. Right now the options we have are Steve Buscemi and Bruce Spence. I've got pictures here, I'll just leave them here with you and come back in a few minutes to hear your decision.
Steve Buscemi:
Bruce Spence:
Not to put too much pressure on you, but you need to hurry, if you want the surgery. The schedule fills up quickly this time of year. Right now the options we have are Steve Buscemi and Bruce Spence. I've got pictures here, I'll just leave them here with you and come back in a few minutes to hear your decision.
Steve Buscemi:
Bruce Spence:
You need a new face. The faces available are Steve Buscemi and Bruce Spence. Why? Because they're the best at having funny faces. Whose face would you rather have?
