You and I {lxngdon & Marygold}

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

It had only been two weeks since Autumn had been discharged from the hospital and two days since she had been attending school. And already she felt like going home. She was quickly reminded why she hated school, well, she had never forgotten, but being there only made her more annoyed with her surroundings. If that was even possible for her to feel more irritated with the place.

She hated the itchy uniform, she hated most of the students seeing how most of them toddled around like idiots and she hated half of the school staff too. It was unfair to hold any hostility toward them, but at the very least she didn't take it out on them. If she could have had it her way, she never would have returned, but her mother literally dragged her out the door to go.

And in the two days, she had been there, she skipped half of her classes. Audy was no idiot, she studied dubiously to excel beyond what they had taught in those classes so it wouldn't matter. But when her father found it he was more than a little upset with her. So, she spent the whole day in school and constantly reminded herself that she wasn't there to socialize but to learn.

It honestly didn't help much and somehow, she had been able to make a friend or two. Though, to be fair, she had known them prior before she had been submitted into the hospital because she had joined their club, the newspaper club. Now that she was back, they officially hang out more.

Yet, she was curious as to who actually read the school newspaper.

"What do you want to do after school ends?" Asked Mia, her fellow club member, and close friend.

The girls were sitting in the open courtyard during the break because Autumn hated the cafeteria. And she preferred a quieter area, one where there weren't too many people around to bother her. Not that anyone would.

From a distance she watched her older sister move across the yard to join a couple of her friends and Autumn couldn't help but snort a little. She held nothing foul against Shona, but she was probably the worst older sister ever considering she ignored her younger sister's existence whenever in public. If their mother knew she would murder her, but Audy wasn't a tattletale and she didn't care too much anyway.

"I don't know, get something real to eat?" She shrugged, looking out and watching more and more group of students passing by.
​

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

"Honestly, Mrs MacAleese is such a fucking cunt ..."

Spencer wasn't really listening to his best friend Charlotte Grayson as they made their way through the outdoor courtyards of their school, Melbourne Grammar. Grammar school meant snobby rich kids, and Spencer was currently scoping out one of those snobby rich kids -- Roman Arvard, high school jock who Spencer was ninety-nine percent sure was gay, leaning against the wall opposite them, looking hot as usual. Instead of listening to Charlotte plot their art teacher's demise, Spencer was plotting his own plan to seduce the model-like jock, though he also had his eyes on one of the theatre girls. He was a bit of a whore.

"Spence, you're not even listening," whined Charlotte, tugging on Spencer's hand until the very tall boy looked down at his very short best friend. Charlotte was very pretty, with lightly tanned skin, bouncing black curls and the perfect figure that was only accentuated by the fact that she was five-one. She was gorgeous, yet, she was one of the handful of girls in their friendship group Spencer hadn't slept with, as that was like incest to him.

He slept around but he wasn't a player or a fuckboy. Rather, he had a mutual understanding with all the people he slept with, which was that it was casual and didn't mean anything. And that had worked out fine for him.

"I am listening. You're going to lock Mrs Mac in the supply closet and fill it with mustard gas. You sound like Hitler."

"I am not -- oh my God."

Spencer tore his eyes away from Roman yet again to look down at Charlotte with concern. He followed her incredulous gaze to ... oh.

"Autumn?"

Evidently flabbergasted, Spencer marched right up to his ex-best friend and frowned down at her, Charlotte trotting behind him. "I thought you moved," he said in a mostly confused but also slightly hurt voice. Autumn, one of the first people he had ever gotten close to, had disappeared out of nowhere and that had wrecked Spencer. ​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

If she had seen Spencer before he was too close to avoid, she would have left. But she had her side turned to him when he approached with Charlotte trailing behind him. And she had no idea what she was supposed to say at all. She had disappeared on mostly everyone but her family. If she could have, she would have kept it from them too.

Her mother was more suffocating than ever since she returned and her father just as distant. Shona was still a bitch and her brother, the one she was closest to was off in college. The only people she had been able to truly hang around with was Mia and Micheal since her return.

Though Spencer, her best friend, ex-best friend, should have been at the top of that list, he wasn't.

"No, I didn't move." Autumn uttered after a silent moment of thought which felt like a jumbled rush in her head, but in reality, it was a little less than thirty seconds. Slyly, she took a step or two back. "I only went on a vacation of the sorts.'

She glanced at Mia who stood at her side, the other girl raised an eyebrow at her.

"A very long vacation." Her voice was firm as if that explained all.​

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

"A very long vacation," Spencer repeated in a whisper.

He chuckled, but it was a humourless sound. In fact, he sounded offended, which was how he felt. He felt betrayed -- she had left, without telling him. Sure, they had been growing apart beforehand, but still, Spencer would think that anyone with common decency would have told their childhood best friend before they moved.

"Well, shit, Autumn. Where'd you go? I'm sure you had a mighty fine vacation --"

"Spence," said Charlotte warningly. Spencer's voice was rising in pitch and lowering in volume, meaning he didn't understand, or he was getting pissed off. Really, it was a combination of the both. He was scowling down at Autumn with shaking hands.

"What ever happened to telling each other everything? I thought we were friends, Autumn. Fuck, I --"

"Spence!" Charlotte was scowling and shaking her head. "Don't. You'll say some things you'll regret later on."​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

Autumn folded her arms tightly over her chest, narrowing her arms slightly. She wasn't angry, what right had she to be? In her mind, there were plenty of reasons, but she remained calm watching and listening to him. In truth, she did feel sorry for disappearing the way she had, almost suffocatingly so, but she had her reasons. She always did.

"Look, I'm sorry." She breathed trying not to sound so defensive. So far, she was failing miserably. "I didn't think you'd actually miss me all that much." That was half true. "I had so much going on at the time I never got around to telling you." She shrugged her shoulders.

She averted her eyes from his, it was relatively easy with him being so tall. So, she looked straight ahead.​

"Anyway, you had - you have plenty of other friends. I'm sure they gave you lots of company."

"Autumn, that's ..." Mia began, looking unsure if she should intervene.

"What? I'm not wrong."

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r​

Her words hit Spencer like a ton of bricks and he actually stumbled back a little at the accusation that he wouldn't miss her. Of course he would miss her! What, did years and years and years of childhood memories mean nothing to her now?

"I ..." For once, Spencer was at a loss for words.

Then his frown was replaced with a deep scowl.

"Fuck you."

"Spencer!"

Spencer ignored Charlotte completely and scowled at Autumn. "It's not my fucking fault that we grew apart -- it's not my fault you couldn't handle me having other friends. And I did miss you. I missed you like crazy. But you didn't miss me, I guess."

And with that, Spencer turned on his heel and stalked away.

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

Autumn frowned in the direction he had left in, she supposed she could have gone after him. But she was unsure if that was a wise idea. In telling him she had missed him meant telling him everything else. And it was such a tangled mess that she wanted to bury there was no point. At least, that was what she told herself.

Anyway, he seemed just fine before spotting her. No doubt he would be okay afterward too. Right? Hell, she was upset too, maybe because some of his words held truth. And that annoyed her.

"You should go after him." She told Charlotte, "Make sure he's okay or something."

"Maybe you should go after him," Mia suggested almost sharply.

Autumn shook her head, her red curls moving with her head movement. "No, that's a very, er, bad idea."

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r​

It was Thursday, meaning that four days had passed since Spencer had learned Autumn was back. He shared five out of his six classes with her, which made him both angry and sad, since he could never escape the fact that he had lost his best friend.

It was the last period of the day and Spencer sat in art, which was easily his best subject. He leaned back in his chair and tried to ignore Autumn's presence as the teacher explained the project.

"Alright, for the next two weeks, you will be working with a partner in creating one painting, showing your different art styles in one theme. I've already picked your partners."

The class groaned.

"Quiet. Okay, Charlotte and Bridget, Laura and Harry, Spencer and Autumn ..."

Spencer sat up straight and glared at the teacher as she read off the rest of the pairings. He was tempted to argue, but Miss Rennick ignored his scowls and told the class to get to work.

Spencer kicked his chair, rose to his feet and angrily sat down beside Autumn. He hated this.

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

"I'm not that happy either, asshole," Whispered Autumn, more to herself than Spencer who now sat at her side. Her eyes slanted slightly so that she was almost glaring, but not quite. She wasn't going to put on on a full scowl like Spencer.

Art wasn't her best subject, nor was it her worst. She did decent enough to pass at an average which was just fine with her considering how she doubted it would ever be of benefit in her future. Though, it was annoying when she had to work with someone else. Yet alone that someone being Spencer Goldman.

She wasn't trying to be mean, but she couldn't help but get defensive. By now, she also wasn't sure how to approach him or if she even wanted to. She had been watching him, when he was around, which was often, and deducted that he was well liked by many, popular. Unlike herself.

"You're good at art, we could probably be done before the two week due date."

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r​

Spencer forced himself to look at her. He couldn't understand why, after all the years he had shared with her, they were hating each other now. What the hell had happened between them?

And why the hell did it affect him so much? It clearly didn't affect her. No, Autumn didn't give a shit about Spencer. If she did, she would have at least told him she was going away, instead of disappearing and then expecting everything to be fine and dandy when she got back.

"Whatever," he said tersely, opening his sketchbook and flicking through the pages. Spencer's art style was realistic -- his pages featured sketches of roses, foxes, animals, and people. He had drawn a picture of Kylie Jenner so realistic it looked like he had pasted a photo onto the pages.

"What do you want to do?" he asked Autumn, since this was a collaborative piece. He opened to a new page and wrote PARTNER ASSIGNMENT W/ AUTUMN as a heading, ready to take notes.

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

Autumn watched him flip through the pages of his sketchbook, her eyes wandering to his drawings. He always was good at art and he seemed to have gotten even better over the time she was gone. There was really no denying his skill and she wouldn't dream of doing so. She knew where compliment was due and his work would and should receive plenty.

"I don't know, you're the art whiz. What do you think is a good idea?" She asked, folding her arms and setting them on her desk.

She truly did value his opinion despite being on unhappy terms with him. "Maybe something broad with lots of room to work with." She added in a soft mumble, her gaze moving to his face.

"Any ideas?"

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

Spencer licked his lips and turned to a page that consisted of sketches of angels. They were all female, and generally naked, with their long hair covering the essentials and their wings furled out. Most of them were sad, crying into their arms with cuts and bruises all over their otherwise perfect bodies.

"If one of us draws a good angel and the other a bad angel, we can put a shit ton of contrast in there and it'll look fantastic," he said. His voice was losing that dead tone and instead being replaced with some degree of excitement. He loved art so much.

"I can do either but it depends on your art style." He knew nothing about Autumn's art style. He barely knew anything about Autumn anymore.

"And I can do the detailing in the face and fingers and shit if you can't."​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

"Well, in that case, you might as well paint both angels." Autumn was joking of course, but there was no doubt she'd let him do the detailing. His work was perfect and she wasn't good with the little things that made a big difference either.

She brought up her fingers to her lips, staring at the the drawings of the broken angels and swallowed hard. She looked away and sighed deeply through her nose. They were extraordinarily drawn, but she didn't want to look at them.

"I'll do the bad angel and you can have the good." She told him, tapping her finger against her lower lip gently.

"You'll have to do the detailing in the face, I think that only be it." She added, briskly and continued to tap her lip.

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

Spencer nodded and licked his lips. He opened his school laptop and Googled 'angels' for inspiration, as he did with all his other drawings. He flickered through the images and took notes on the things he liked, such as the detailing in the wings, and the shade of hair.

"Maybe they can be facing one another," he murmured, gesturing to an image of two angels, lifted in the sky by their beautiful wings, facing one another with divine sunshine washing over their faces.

"And my good angel can have a dark, nighttime background and yours can have a daytime background." The idea was exciting to him. "So then we can have contrast in the background, too. Contrast is important."

Brainstorming like this with Autumn almost allowed Spencer to feel like it was childhood again, when he and Audy would stay up into the early hours of the morning and talk about nonsense. Share ideas, dreams. He missed that. He missed the closeness they had once shared.​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

"Yeah, they can also, I don't know, be a reflection to the other?" Autumn straightened her back, becoming eager herself the more he talked about it. She flipped open her notebook to a blank page and grabbed her pencil from her desk to jot down quick notes on all they had decided.

It was strange how easily she was able to become comfortable beside him, with him. At the same time, it wasn't. Spencer had been the one person she was closest to, had felt the most comfortable and happy with. And now, despite them holding some unpleasant feelings toward one another, she was still able to relax. It was natural for her, but she'd be ready to be defensive again at any time.

These weren't the good old days anymore. And she knew that long before she went away.

"They could be the same angel, but reflecting one another's opposite. Or something like that." She suggested, wanting to contribute more to the idea. Her gaze wandered to the image of the two angels facing each other on the computer screen.

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

"Ooh, good idea," Spencer murmured, noting that down. "Mine should have blonde hair and a white dress and white wings and yours should have black hair, black wings and a dark dress. You know, to accurately represent the opposites of the two of them." Spencer was growing far too interested in the lore of their drawing.

If he forgot what had gone down between them, it was almost easy for Spencer to forget everything and pretend this was the past. To pretend that he and Autumn were still the best of friends and they had never grown apart. Sure, Spencer had a lot of friends now and Charlotte meant the world to him, but Autumn was different. Autumn had seen him through his highs and lows, his good times and his bad times.

Once upon a time, Autumn had meant the world to him, too. But that was in the past now, and that saddened him.

He was finished taking notes so Spencer got out a box of coloured pencils and began to make small swatches to find the right shade of gold he wanted for his angel's hair. He licked his lips and looked up at Autumn out of the corner of his eye.

"How have you been?" he asked softly. "Really." He knew they weren't the best of friends anymore but that didn't mean he didn't still care about her.​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

How had she been? Sincerely? Horrible, absolutely horrible. And him only asking made her want to break down and burst into tears. To tell him everything like she had used to, it had always made her feel better. He had always made her feel better.

But things weren't that simple anymore and she wouldn't cru in the middle of class. Besides the thought of it being completely and utterly mortifying, her parents would take it as an episode if they heard.

"I've been doing fine," She lied, her voice taking a quiet note. The redhead had originally drawing head outlines for practice, but now she was unconsciously scribbling on her paper.

Of course she was fine. She had to be, otherwise she'd still be locked away in that hospital. So she had to be okay. Because she was not going back.

"I've just ... I've been doing okay.' She bit her thumb's nail. Nail-biting, a habit she couldn't seem to ever break.

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

Just like he had always done when they were children, Spencer took her hand and moved her thumb away from her mouth so she couldn't bite her nails. It wasn't a romantic gesture, but rather just a tender one, and he set her hand down on the table beside his collection of pencils.

"Stephanie got into law school." Stephanie, Spencer's older sister, who had always wanted to be a lawyer and had frequently talked about her career goals to Spencer and Autumn when they were kids. It was the most mundane thing in the world to talk about, but it made Spencer think they could still be best friends, in primary school, dreaming of their futures.

"And Samantha's doing biomedical science." Another of Spencer's older sisters. "My dad got promoted to the head surgeon at the Royal Children's Hospital."​

 

[MaryGold]

A U T U M N
​

"That's wonderful," Autumn managed to genuinely smile at the news he had just shared. It was more than a little nice to hear about other people's wins an accomplishments. Even more so when they were people she were fond of. And she was very fond of of the Goldman's, they were practically a second family to her.

She found them all to be a comfort, and loved to stay at their house, mostly when things were unbearable at her own home. Hearing about them was nice, pleasurable, even. She missed them, she missed him.

Autumn balled her hand onto a fist to prevent herself from biting her nails any further. She glanced at her notes quietly and sighed.

"Spencer," She looked back to the boy and whispered."I am sorry for not telling you about my leaving. And for the way I acted earlier, I was just ... I dunno." She shrugged her shoulders. Honestly, she supposed it didn't even matter anymore.

 

[lxngdon]

s p e n c e r
​

Spencer licked his lips to prevent himself from crying. As a child, he had never thought he'd lose his best friend. He had thought that he and Autumn would grow up and still be best friends. Their kids would grow up and be best friend themselves. She would be there for everything.

But they had grown apart. And he didn't understand why.

He reached over and squeezed her hand reassuringly. "I can understand why you didn't tell me," he said, truthfully. "We grew apart. That's just a fact."

A sad, miserable, heartbreaking fact, but a fact all the same.

"But ..." He wiped a single tear off his cheek. "I mean, if you're willing to come over for dinner and try and repatch things I'd love to do that."​