Yes, Im alive. They saved me if you will. DONT panic. Im fine. No I dont want to talk about it, but thank you. Im doing the best that I can to just write this much. Thanks to Ocha and Cor Cor Ive got the will to come back. Ive been scared to and have stayed away from anyone and everyone I thought I might hurt. Being gone it seems has done more harm then good and so I was fucked either way it seems. So... *big deep breath* Im okay... I want to cry but I wont. I want to puke but Im not.. I just want to say that I do remember what its like to have a family here and well Im sorry if in my darkness I lost everything that was still right infront of me. Thank you for taking me back and if I need to be chewed on and forced to eat dust bunnies or someones socks I better have some ketchup ok. So thanks all and yes Im back.