Why You Shouldn't Fuck With Scottish People

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Grumpy, Mar 15, 2010.

  1. [​IMG]

    Just saying...
  2. Because it's too mean to mess with dyslexic english version of hicks?
  3. He kicked a burning terrorist? Thats just cruel!
  4. No, it would have been cruel if he put the fire out, then kicked the terrorist in the balls, then lit him back up again.
  5. If he wasn't drunk and/or stoned out his face at the time, he probably would have.
  6. That poooooooooor terrorist.
  7. Prior pulled back and licked the blood off his lips, growling to himself as he wiped the stain clean. Matthew and Ferrara both glared at him while Matthew's neck regenerated. He winced as it sealed shut, scowling at the vampire.

    "That's real strong stuff," he chuckled and wiped his mouth. "And an infinite supply. No way I'm letting this go. It feeds me and the Master so much!" he raised an eyebrow at Matthew. He and Ferrara were tied to two chairs, Ferrara glaring at the vampire while Matthew just kept his eyes rolled. "How are you not changing? With your blood, you'd be the ultimate vampire."

    Matt smirked. "My magic lets me regenerate from anything, and vampirism damages cells - "

    "If by 'damage' you mean 'improve,'" Prior corrected.

    "My point is, my cells can't be changed without me changing them back," he repeated. "If you want me as some sort of...super weapon, better tools than you have tried."

    "Tools?!" Prior grabbed the immortal's neck and lifted him - and the chair he was strapped to - up into the air.

    Matthew just chuckled. "Yeah. Tool to your Master. Tool to Lorentz. When was the last time you ever did anything for yourself? I mean, would you keep us alive if not following that psycho's orders?"

    "Matthew?" Ferrara turned to raise an eyebrow at him.

    "I mean, you can't kill me, and Ferrara's hardly worth it, but you get my point," he went on. "What fun is it just sitting here? I've been locked up many times, and I gotta tell you, every time I broke out, I didn't hang around in the prison walls. Besides, we caught you in the first place, wouldn't you rather put some distance between yourself and the only people that know you exist?"

    Prior snarled, then turned and stalked out the door. Ferrara looked at Matthew and started tugging at the twist ties he had around his wrists. "I can't believe that actually worked."

    "You said it would," Matt replied. He grunted as he broke his hand, slipping it out of his binds and cracking the bones back in place.

    "Well, Prior's cruel and sadistic, but he was never known for being particularly bright," the director replied. "Didn't appreciate the liberties you took with it, though."


    In the radio station's DJ booth Karin Krauser flicked a few switches. She boosted the power to the tower and began broadcasting a high-decibel signal in a sub-audible range humans couldn't hear but vamps could. The only problem was that radio waves weren't audible , even to vampires. Thankfully, Sam wasn't the only one who knew how to jury-rig a machine. Karin knew that a point contact diode could be made with two simple metals. The radio tower was already one metal; she had Crossfire out on the tower itself attaching another, less conductive one to it, so that their radio frequency could be changed to audible sound.

    "How are you doing out there?" Karin asked.

    "High ground isn't a big comfort against creatures with a jump that's practically flight," the marksman replied from outside. "Almost set, though."

    "We won't be subjected to the low-frequency sound, will we?" Ruth asked Karin as she guarded the door.

    "We'll feel a little nauseated afterwards, but our ears won't be ringing like the vampires'," she replied. She was stopped by the sharp crack of an axe striking the door behind them. Ruth raised her gun and fired.

    "Hey!" They recognized the voice and stepped back as Erika kicked her way in, swinging her axe and resting it on her shoulder. "The fuck are you shootin' at me for?"

    "We thought you might be a vampire."

    "Who uses an axe?" she chuckled. Immediately her eyes alighted on the radio equipment and brightened up. "Ooh! We going to do some DJ-ing? Make this a kick-ass rave! Woo-woo!"

    "We're going to bust the vampires' eardrums," Ruth explained.

    She pumped her face. "Yeah, bitches! What're we going to do for Lorentz?"

    "He's here?"

    "Heading towards the radio tower," she nodded.

    Karin tapped her ear communicator. "Cross - "

    "Yeah, I know."


    Natalia walked through the streets with Jill and Raven on either flank. The vampires weren't running rampant everywhere in the streets like the blood puppets did. They were a little more intelligent, lurking in the shadows and waiting for an opportune moment to strike. Unfortunately, many of them could feel the presence of Natalia's power, and were perhaps smart enough to avoid it, while probably also being tempted by the amount of energy she possessed.

    As such, this time she had to hunt them out, a prospect she didn't particularly enjoy. She teleported them to a rooftop where two vampires were lurking. She whipped her hand at one and threw it against one of the corners, ripping at its shoulder and breaking several bones. While this vampire healed back from the strike the other one jumped at Jill. She blocked his fangs with her arm guards, screaming before quickly recovering herself. She rolled and the vampire let go, only to get shocked by Raven. As it convulsed its flesh started to burn. During this, Raven pulled out a small stone disk with a needle of metal. It spun, forming a brilliant light and burning the vampire to a crisp.

    "What the hell was that?!" Jill demanded.

    "Sun dial," Raven explained. "Ever since I started working alongside Hushcobb over the Sanguinaar, I've been exposed to the monsters they've got locked up. Figured if we were dealing with a vamp breakout, I should use the one anti-vampire weapon my grandfather had out within reach."

    "RAAAA!" The other vampire lunged for them, only to spontaneously explode, with every drop of blood somehow avoiding them.

    "Or you could do that," Natalia added, putting her arm down.

    "Natalia! That was...savage!" Jill said. She looked around her at the gore smeared on the rooftop with obvious disgust.

    "Their souls are already damned. If anything, I was quick," she replied heartlessly. She shook her head and crossed her arms. "I'm sorry. This is the second time this has happened. I can't help feeling that I'm putting these people in danger. And I'm getting tired of all this."

    "They're Hushcobb," Raven supplanted. "They're used to danger."

    "Not on this level. It's becoming increasingly obvious this is over their heads. This place is a target as long as..." She stopped and looked up and to the right.

    "Natalia?" The two moved closer to her, but she paid them no heed, instead pointing to the radio tower.

    "Lorentz is going to make a big strike," she said. "Erika's over there."


    Lorentz landed on top of the radio tower, his feet magnetically held to the steel structure as he looked down at Crossfire and levitated two of his bits of bone-shaped armor together. A spark shot between them, building like a deadly Lincoln's Ladder towards the marksman. Cross waited until the last moment before jumping off, flipping in midair, and using his gun to send a wooden stake straight into Lorentz's skull.

    He grabbed the structure again and looked up at the ragdoll body. "Sorry, Sam. I got first shot."

    But as Lorentz started to fall his arm suddenly twisted and his hand grabbed the structure. The rest of his body hung limp but his other arm jerked up, moving like it was on unseen marionette strings. He grabbed the stake in his head and ripped it out, and once he did so the three-inch deep hole in his skull began slowly regenerating. Lorentz blinked and looked at the bloody stake in his hand, then down at Crossfire.

    "Did you just kill me?" he asked.

    "Thought I did."

    The demonic sadist smiled. "Well, it looks like I've got some powerful friends, then, doesn't it gun-boy? Don't much appreciate the supervision, but I'll take the save." He dropped the stake and raised his hand high. "Let's bring on the noise."

    He flashed himself in a dramatic pose, and the radio tower ripped apart. It twisted and bent, sparking all the while with electricity. The tower was split in four, each point facing the cardinal directions, and four major locations in Hushcobb. A blue-white discharge shook the entire thing, sending huge bolts of plasma in four directions. One blast tore into one of the apartment complexes. Another hit the radio station itself, the DJ room thankfully evacuated before it could be blown to smithereens. The third hit the town hall, tearing a big hole in it.

    The fourth was sent at the jail, where it would break through the top and render the Inversion Lockup completely unsalvageable.

    Or it would have, if Natalia hadn't intervened.

    Natalia teleported in front of the jail and then jumped forward. Then again. And again and again and again, rising with each burst higher up. The plasma followed her path up.

    Lorentz got a brief look at her before she teleported past him. He felt a powerful gust of wind and was pushed upwards. He turned to see Natalia hovering above him, her white coat fluttering in the air, making her look like some kind of mad angel. She pointed at Lorentz. Or rather, behind him. His own railgun blast was reflected back at him, arcing up and into him. Wearing metal armor, he acted as a perfect conductor, until those plates bent and blew apart in glowing red shards.

    He stared at Natalia in shock as he fell, his spasming jaw mouthing one word: "Twice?"

    He fell to the earth, but as soon as Natalia and Crossfire got down to him, he was already healing.

    "That's the second time he's done that," Crossfire acknowledged. "He's got a powerful healer helping him somehow."

    "Emily," Natalia concluded darkly. Suddenly EISU gave off an alert. "Can you take care of him? I have to go somewhere else."

    "Go for it. I see Sam running his way here."

    She was already gone.
  8. What if he put the terrorist out, nursed the terrorist back to health, raped the terrorist, lit him on fire, put him out, kicked him in the balls, lit him on fire again and shoved a grenade up his ass and then choked him to death?

    That way, it would fit both definitions.
  9. Hee~
  10. *Kicks Myrnodyn in the balls for being a literal bastard*
  11. I like this thread!
  12. Weird...