Why Torsty hates Britain and Japan

Blind Hemingway

A former executive or something.
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So by now, we all know our little Viking friend hates Japan and Britain. However, none of us have ever tried to figure this out until now.

Here's the reasons why:

Number One Island nations. Vikings automatically hate islands and try conquering them.

Number Two: Off the Coast of Eurasia, flanking opposite sides of the continent. Again Vikings hate islands.

Number Three: Both nations are kind of stand-offish from their neighborhood international organizations: Great Britain is distant from the EU, while Japan is distant from ASEAN. Thus both need to be sacked just like Christian monasteries.

Number Four: Lapdogs of the Western foreign policies, I mean let's face it Japan's military is just American and the British really don't seem to do much these days but still has a pretty strong military...Both of which makes these islands hard to sack, therefore making him one unhappy Viking.
 

Hydronine

The Murrstress
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I love this!
 
F

Fel of the Eternal Forest

Guest
When you say sack, you really mean rape. That's what vikings really do, to hell with all the loot.
 
K

Karsikan the Berzerker

Guest
well know they rape the women and take the stuff. leaving them with nothing but naked pregnant bitches.
 

Torsty

Super Peace Busters Always Together, Forever!
Number Three: Both nations are kind of stand-offish from their neighborhood international organizations: Great Britain is distant from the EU, while Japan is distant from ASEAN. Thus both need to be sacked just like Christian monasteries.
This part doesn't add up as sooner or later Norway and Lichtenstein will be the only countries left outside the EU in Europe. Everything else is pretty much correct.
 
K

Krang

Guest
Aerial suppression, Viking style. Spray with beer gas until they're too drunk to shoot straight.

Invade.

Some might think this is a waste of beer, but what better way to combine beer and combat, top two on a Viking's To Do?
 

Hydronine

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THEY MAKE EVIL TEA?!
 
O

Ochalla

Guest
*gasp* How can you even SAY that! Tea is the most wonderful and pure substance on this planet. The Way of Tea does not allow for "evil". It is tea!
 
T

Tain

Guest
What if the tea is evil by way of the person drinking said tea?
 

Blind Hemingway

A former executive or something.
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,
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Slow As Molasses
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NEVER
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Adept, Douche
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Primarily Prefer Female
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Surrealism, Surreal Horror (Think Tim Burton), Steampunk, Sci-Fi Fantasy, Spaghetti Westerns, Mercenaries, Dieselpunk, Cyberpunk, Historical fantasies
As Fel put it, Tort and his Viking bands can no longer easily rape. This is why he hates these nations. And the worst thing that can happen in Britain is like a drive by argument, so that also makes him mad because it's not enough good old fashioned butt kicking.
 

Blind Hemingway

A former executive or something.
Original poster
Invitation Status
,
Posting Speed
Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
NEVER
Writing Levels
Adept, Douche
Preferred Character Gender
Primarily Prefer Female
Genres
Surrealism, Surreal Horror (Think Tim Burton), Steampunk, Sci-Fi Fantasy, Spaghetti Westerns, Mercenaries, Dieselpunk, Cyberpunk, Historical fantasies
I think she's the only person here that could kick Tort's Viking butt...
 

Torsty

Super Peace Busters Always Together, Forever!
>=(

Stop with the VIKINGS RAPE LOLZ!1" stigma!
FFFFFFFFFFF, YOUR ANCESTORS PROBABLY RAPED AS MUCH AS MINE! GOTHS, ROMANS, GREEKS, SPARTANS, TURKS, EGYPTIANS, MONGOLS AND WHAT ELSE! U KNOW, OTHER EUROPEANS/ASIANS/AFRICANS?

OH RIGHT LOLZ!! U GUISES BE AMERICANS! GOD BLESS!NO WAIT! UR ANCESTURZ WUSN'T! LULZ!

Unless you're like redmangurlface Ampoule.