Why Torsty hates Britain and Japan

[Blind Hemingway]

So by now, we all know our little Viking friend hates Japan and Britain. However, none of us have ever tried to figure this out until now.

Here's the reasons why:

Number One Island nations. Vikings automatically hate islands and try conquering them.

Number Two: Off the Coast of Eurasia, flanking opposite sides of the continent. Again Vikings hate islands.

Number Three: Both nations are kind of stand-offish from their neighborhood international organizations: Great Britain is distant from the EU, while Japan is distant from ASEAN. Thus both need to be sacked just like Christian monasteries.

Number Four: Lapdogs of the Western foreign policies, I mean let's face it Japan's military is just American and the British really don't seem to do much these days but still has a pretty strong military...Both of which makes these islands hard to sack, therefore making him one unhappy Viking.

 

[Hydronine]

I love this!

 

[Fel of the Eternal Forest]

When you say sack, you really mean rape. That's what vikings really do, to hell with all the loot.

 

[Darkness]

Hoooooly shiiiit.

 

[Karsikan the Berzerker]

well know they rape the women and take the stuff. leaving them with nothing but naked pregnant bitches.

 

[Torsty]

Number Three: Both nations are kind of stand-offish from their neighborhood international organizations: Great Britain is distant from the EU, while Japan is distant from ASEAN. Thus both need to be sacked just like Christian monasteries.

This part doesn't add up as sooner or later Norway and Lichtenstein will be the only countries left outside the EU in Europe. Everything else is pretty much correct.

 

[Krang]

Aerial suppression, Viking style. Spray with beer gas until they're too drunk to shoot straight.

Invade.

Some might think this is a waste of beer, but what better way to combine beer and combat, top two on a Viking's To Do?

 

[Asmodeus]

the British really don't seem to do much these days

There is SO much wrong with this comment.

 

[Fel of the Eternal Forest]

This thread NEEDS MOAR RAPE

 

[Ochalla]

Come on we know the real reason is TEA!

 

[Torsty]

I like tea.

 

[Hydronine]

THEY MAKE EVIL TEA?!

 

[Ochalla]

*gasp* How can you even SAY that! Tea is the most wonderful and pure substance on this planet. The Way of Tea does not allow for "evil". It is tea!

 

[Tain]

What if the tea is evil by way of the person drinking said tea?

 

[Blind Hemingway]

As Fel put it, Tort and his Viking bands can no longer easily rape. This is why he hates these nations. And the worst thing that can happen in Britain is like a drive by argument, so that also makes him mad because it's not enough good old fashioned butt kicking.

 

[Necella]

This thread NEEDS MOAR RAPE

 

[Myrnodyn]

I'm sure Necella would be too eager to start it off...

 

[Blind Hemingway]

I think she's the only person here that could kick Tort's Viking butt...

 

[Krang]

 

[Torsty]

>=(

Stop with the VIKINGS RAPE LOLZ!1" stigma!
FFFFFFFFFFF, YOUR ANCESTORS PROBABLY RAPED AS MUCH AS MINE! GOTHS, ROMANS, GREEKS, SPARTANS, TURKS, EGYPTIANS, MONGOLS AND WHAT ELSE! U KNOW, OTHER EUROPEANS/ASIANS/AFRICANS?

OH RIGHT LOLZ!! U GUISES BE AMERICANS! GOD BLESS!NO WAIT! UR ANCESTURZ WUSN'T! LULZ!

Unless you're like redmangurlface Ampoule.