Why Everyone Wants to Have Sex with Vampires

Earlly one morning there is this guy that that walks up to me and looks at me because all though that I am a vampire I know how things work.

With so how many people look's at what you are and see's that you are different. I am a smart child but I am only 18 years old, I born in a small town called forks. Well a made up town. I had got up one morning and relize that I was in a differnet world that most people when it is sunny I cant go out side because of what I am, if I step a foot in the sun I will be notice because I sparkle. What is the way to get out of this world is it because the vampires are different or is it because I am a vampire.
 
I know what they mean. I spend my evenings awake and never go outside during the day either. Everyone assumes we all live during the day, but they just don't understand that some of us can't. Some of us burn up in the sun, and some of us have such shining complexions that we blind others. It's not like I go around biting and eating people all the time. These movies make us real vampires look bad.
 
*Drunkenly stumbles in*

What the fuck is this whiny emo crap, you were given the gift of nearly limitless power and immortality and you bitch about it? Stop being a fucking pansy! You're not some fragile little human anymore, you are a fucking hunter in the night. These multitudes of human cattle are nothing but food, and a few might make a good playtoy until they inevitably get worn out or break if you're too rough with them. Jesus H Tittyfucking Christ when did they start embracing people before their balls dropped.
 
Bah this 5 year fad is annoying, I think I'll just stick to concrete awesome thank ya. *grabs the stuff that's been around for the last 15 years.*
 
Vampires are overused, since Twilight came out. It's the sappy vampires now, and no one wants to remember the ones that were in movies before Twilight. But on a side note, some of them can be sexy and well... if you like dark vampires, that's why. -Shrugs.- Just sayin'.
 
Nosferatu will bite all of you fakers necks off!

The day will come....
The day will come....