Which character trait should everyone have?

[Hatsune Candy]

Honesty.

Honesty to tell people how bad things are and the integrity to not hide it for fear of hurting them.

Sometimes people need a helping hand to get back on their feet. Altruism is another good one if people didn't abuse it. Same with tolerance.

Wait, hold on, the more I think about it, the less I understand. How could you abuse altruism? I guess if you were only helping people for the sake of an award that could be considered abuse. But then it wouldn't really be altruism, because even through you'd be doing selfless acts, it would be for selfish reasons, and that's just not very altruistic at all.

If any of these traits good be abused, it's honesty. Far too often have I seen it used as a way to be unnecessarily cruel. You know what they say, the truth hurts, ignorance is bliss, etcetera, etcetera. Whether or not honesty is a good thing is very situational, whereas that's not the case with altruism or tolerance.

 

[Windsong]

Wait, hold on, the more I think about it, the less I understand. How could you abuse altruism? I guess if you were only helping people for the sake of an award that could be considered abuse. But then it wouldn't really be altruism, because even through you'd be doing selfless acts, it would be for selfish reasons, and that's just not very altruistic at all.

If any of these traits good be abused, it's honesty. Far too often have I seen it used as a way to be unnecessarily cruel. You know what they say, the truth hurts, ignorance is bliss, etcetera, etcetera.

People abusing your altruism. Not you abusing it.

The truth does hurt and I'd be far happier knowing less than I do. It's why media doesn't tell you everything. Pretty sure any good trait can be abused in some form though. You know what they say..

"The road to ruin is paved with good intentions."

 

[Hatsune Candy]

People abusing your altruism. Not you abusing it.

The truth does hurt and I'd be far happier knowing less than I do. It's why media doesn't tell you everything. Pretty sure any good trait can be abused in some form though. You know what they say..

"The road to ruin is paved with good intentions."

Ah, I see, that makes much more sense. People do tend to take advantage of others' kindness. But, ya know, I'm not gullible, I can tell when people are taking advantage of me and I'm not one to let that slide.

 

[Kagayours]

And thats exactly why a great majority of ppl arent capable of critical thinking, in my honest (keyword, honest) opinion. White lies and half-truths are the reason todays world is as fucked up as it is. Sometimes you need to have a thick skin and handle the truth. It can be unpleasant, but its worth it. Lies only lead to more lies.

Hmm... but if that's your reasoning... then wouldn't tolerance be the most important?

Kestrel's point was that people need half-truths and white lies -- and you said it's bad that people can't handle the truth, but that doesn't mean that being honest in-and-of-itself creates a problem: it's people not being able to handle other people's honesty that would be the problem.

If everyone were totally honest with each other, but some people couldn't handle the truths that other people said about them, and retaliated with their honest emotions (despite how ugly some of those emotions might be)... then it isn't the lack of honesty that's the problem. It's people's inability to tolerate all that honesty that's the problem.

It's totally possible for someone to be brutally honest with everyone around them and still not be able to handle receiving the same treatment. It would be hypocritical of them, sure, but hypocrites certainly exist. And in that case, everyone being honest wouldn't exactly fix the issue of people not having thick skins.

 

[LogicfromLogic]

Tolerance and while it wasn't up there, compassion.

 

[Marchosias]

Hmm... but if that's your reasoning... then wouldn't tolerance be the most important?

Kestrel's point was that people need half-truths and white lies -- and you said it's bad that people can't handle the truth, but that doesn't mean that being honest in-and-of-itself creates a problem: it's people not being able to handle other people's honesty that would be the problem.

If everyone were totally honest with each other, but some people couldn't handle the truths that other people said about them, and retaliated with their honest emotions (despite how ugly some of those emotions might be)... then it isn't the lack of honesty that's the problem. It's people's inability to tolerate all that honesty that's the problem.

It's totally possible for someone to be brutally honest with everyone around them and still not be able to handle receiving the same treatment. It would be hypocritical of them, sure, but hypocrites certainly exist. And in that case, everyone being honest wouldn't exactly fix the issue of people not having thick skins.

Wel yes. Honesty and thick skin go hand-in-hand. So yes, I guess tolerance plays a part. But I stil think honesty has to come first in that line-up. I think I'l put it this way; tolerance w/o honesty is a weaknes and a liability, since dis-honest people wil easily exploit your tolerance. Tolerance complementing honesty is strength. And agreed, honesty w/o tolerance is hipocrisy. They are inter-conected, but honesty does rank higher.

But I disagree with your point that being honest wont fix the thin-skin issue. It wil, its a simple matter of conditioning. Unless they want to be upset all the time over shit not worth it, ppl wuld have to grow thicker skins. Basicly thats what I say, vhen someone dont like my directness, and is ofended/upset/butt-hurt. I say "no ofence, but you might want to learn to deal vith the truth" or something along those lines. Truth can hurt, but the more time you hear it, the more used to it you get, and the less it hurts. Mental conditioning. Just like physical conditioning, taking repeated blows to any part of your body gets that part tougher, and you feel less and less pain vhen hit there, until eventualy you dont feel anything at all. Same principle.

 

[Kagayours]

But I disagree with your point that being honest wont fix the thin-skin issue. It wil, its a simple matter of conditioning. Unless they want to be upset all the time over shit not worth it, ppl wuld have to grow thicker skins. Basicly thats what I say, vhen someone dont like my directness, and is ofended/upset/butt-hurt. I say "no ofence, but you might want to learn to deal vith the truth" or something along those lines. Truth can hurt, but the more time you hear it, the more used to it you get, and the less it hurts. Mental conditioning. Just like physical conditioning, taking repeated blows to any part of your body gets that part tougher, and you feel less and less pain vhen hit there, until eventualy you dont feel anything at all. Same principle.

I understand your point about growing thick skins, but being honest has nothing to do with it. People learning to tolerate that sort of thing isn't dependent on them being honest.

You could say it depends on other people being honest, but any individual can be completely dishonest and surrounded by honest people, and learn to tolerate the things they say about them... but that won't make them any more honest. And being honest won't make them any more tolerant.

 

[Marchosias]

Wel sure, it wont make them any more honest, but it wil help them develop thicker skins. :P Thats a start, hehe. Being honest comes later, after they stop being so damn sensitive!

 

[Brovo]

Honesty and tolerance without altruism is a toothless wolf howling at the moon. Be as honest and as tolerant as you wish: If you aren't altruistic, your words are entirely meaningless. Perhaps, worse still, destructive, as it is possible to desire equity over equality (tolerance), or the pursuit of an ideological position that is otherwise destructive to the rest of society (honesty).

 

[ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ]

I put honesty, but really, why isn't patience on the list? I think that's a trait that everyone should have, and there's a severe lack of it from pretty much everyone anymore.

 

[Hatsune Candy]

Tolerance and while it wasn't up there, compassion.

But... But... Altruism encompasses compassion...

I put honesty, but really, why isn't patience on the list? I think that's a trait that everyone should have, and there's a severe lack of it from pretty much everyone anymore.

Patience isn't up there for two reasons:

1) It's too similar to tolerance
2) As I said, this is for my statistics class; I was only allow to put three options, no more, no less.

 

[LogicfromLogic]

But... But... Altruism encompasses compassion...

I wasn't sure what that meant to be all honest and I was too damn lazy to look it up.

 

[Brovo]

I wasn't sure what that meant to be all honest and I was too damn lazy to look it up.

Altruism is about giving to others without any sort of selfish thought involved. Charity organizations such as Doctors Without Borders are examples of altruism in a nutshell: Give to, and care about, others, without a hint of self-interest in mind.

Which is why my vote went to altruism when I spent a minute thinking about the three choices. If you don't have an inherent desire to wish and do good upon the world, I will have to question your every motive behind your every action--even if it's for otherwise good qualities like tolerance and honesty. The evil we should worry most about rarely desires to kick puppies, it's usually derived from the self-righteous who want the puppy to live--but only in whatever way they deem is acceptable, rather than having an inherent desire to see the puppy live to its fullest.

 

[LogicfromLogic]

Altruism is about giving to others without any sort of selfish thought involved. Charity organizations such as Doctors Without Borders are examples of altruism in a nutshell: Give to, and care about, others, without a hint of self-interest in mind.

Which is why my vote went to altruism when I spent a minute thinking about the three choices. If you don't have an inherent desire to wish and do good upon the world, I will have to question your every motive behind your every action--even if it's for otherwise good qualities like tolerance and honesty. The evil we should worry most about rarely desires to kick puppies, it's usually derived from the self-righteous who want the puppy to live--but only in whatever way they deem is acceptable, rather than having an inherent desire to see the puppy live to its fullest.

Very well said.

 

[Nemaisare]

I voted altruism.

My initial reaction answer was tolerance, because it's a very good thing to have others accepting of others. But that also leaves room for simply letting things happen. Things that might not be so great. You can put up with a lot if you're tolerant, and that's not always a good idea.

And honesty, while it is generally more acceptable than lying, can have its own consequences. Transparency is nice for the general public for the most part, but honesty does not mean speaking only truth, it also means being willing to share your true opinions. And there are a lot of people with a lot of horrible opinions that are being a little too open and honest about their thoughts right now. When honesty combines with anger, things ignite, fast.

Altruism can lead to its own problems, I'm sure, maybe stagnation? Or overly competitive helpfulness? Attempts to be good to others that backfire? But it seems a little less likely to cause damage if everyone's got it.

 

[Roose Hurro]

I voted Tolerance.

Originally I was going to say Honesty, because that is vitally important.
We need to work on true and honest information to thrive, and as a result we need honest individuals.

However, how can we ever be expected to move forward if we cannot work together in the first place?
And that's where Tolerance comes into the picture.

And I have to ask... How can we ever expect to work together if we are not honest with each other? So, I voted Honesty. Because, without Honesty, the other two cannot "truly" exist.

 

[Nemaisare]

I'm pretty sure that each of these traits is fully capable of existing without the others. They aren't mutually exclusive, but neither are they necessarily inclusive. I can be honest without having good intentions. I could be honest simply because I don't care to lie, or I have been brought up not to, whether or not I believe it is my moral imperative to speak the truth does not depend on my willingness to tolerate other people or my desire to do good for others. I might be mostly motivated by my desire to not get caught in a lie.

Tolerance can be as simple as apathy. Which requires neither honesty nor altruism.

And altruism does not need someone to be honest or tolerant to attempt it. The most homophobic, racist, sexist person could still manage to do something good for someone else without expecting reparation. They might have a limited choice, but that doesn't mean the good deed is less good. And telling the truth doesn't really enter into the act of doing something kind.

It's really only the best of all these traits that requires a combination of all of them, not just two. And probably a whole lot of other traits that aren't included in the poll.

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

And I have to ask... How can we ever expect to work together if we are not honest with each other? So, I voted Honesty. Because, without Honesty, the other two cannot "truly" exist.

People tend to defend a lack of honesty with stuff like 'white lies'.

So they may not always give accurate info (which is a HUGE problem, but we are being forced to pick only one characteristic here) but the intention to work together would still be present.
While Honesty, by itself would simply mean everyone's honest about hating everyone else and wanting them to die.