When Booty Calls (Pirate RP)

[Digi-Guy]

Captain Lawfrey sat on the bowsprit of this ship. Well, technically he reclined on the bowsprit. Ok if we are getting specific here, he reclined on a sofa that was mounted on the bowsprit. He was sleeping there quite contentedly. His snoring was loud, louder than sound of the sound of the boat plowing through the open waters. Even louder than the winds that carried their junky ship. The ships name as The Shoddy Corsair. It got its name because…well it was made by shoddy craftsmen drunk on shoddy rum. The only reason it was still functional was because of the dedicated shipwright that was constantly repairing the vessel. Hooks the Quarter Master slowly walked out unto the bow of the ship.

"Yes…that lazy sack of lard is sound asleep! Now I will kill him and take the ship as my own" thought the murderous pirate as he got close to the slumbering captain.

"ZzzzzzzzzHookssucksatlifezzzzzzzzzz." Snored the captain.

"Huh?" Hooks said quietly

"ZzzzzzzHookssmellslikeoldsogggyfishtacoszzzzzzzz"

"Captain? Are you awake?" asked Hooks. There was silence. So Hooks took out his infamous hooks and raised his arms up to strike.

"Zzzzzzzzhowdoeshooksevenwalkwithoutdyingfromstupidityzzzzzz" again snored the captain
.
"What? Did you just? I'm gonna! Gaw just die!" yelled Hooks as he drove his hands down to strike at the captain. Unfortunately for Hooks, at that time Lawfrey spun the sofa on its swivel and knocked Hooks off the ship. "GAH!" Hooks yelled as he fell.

"Who in the what now?" Said the Captain scratching his head and looking around for who had yelled.

"Ugh….captain….we're coming into port soon. Land is in sight…" Hooks said from below. The quarter master managed to stick one of hooks into the side of ship, saving himself from a cold swim.

"Hooks! What in the blazes are you doing down there?"

"Nothing sir…I was just….looking for my uh…..pet hermit crab" Lied the man hanging on the side of the boat.

"Oh that was your pet? Well, he tasted great!" Said the fat man in the chair.

"You ate Scuttles?" Cried Hooks?

"Yup. I'll be in my cabin should you need me." Said the captain as he waddled off the bowsprit.

"Scuttles…*sniffle*"

After Hooks shed a tear or two for his lost hermit crab, he climbed up the side of the ship and hopped onto the deck. He straightened his coat and collar. Had to look somewhat presentable to his motley crew of scallywags!

"OY! FIRST MATE! FRONT AND CENTER! And where is that bloody music women? Is she passed out again?" Yelled Hooks quite obnoxiously.

 

[Trignome]

"Gaw just die!...GAH!" Serkan glanced up just in time to see the quarter master launch himself overboard. What a strange guy.

Sighing, the man returned to his task of looping the excess sails' line for storage. Lately, with all the crew's drunken attempts to bungee jump off of the ship's masts, the braided ropes that were used to secure the sails were worn down by the repeated abuse. Serkan had complained to the captain, and of course it hadn't gotten him anything but a conciliatory mug of rum.

Feeling the planks beneath his feet trembling, Serkan nodded his head curtly. "Captain Lardy." The big fat walrus valiant captain of the Shoddy Corsair passed the first mate, no doubt to continue his nap in the rat-hole Captain's cabin. The unmistakable crunch of punctured wood sounded from just behind Serkan. He turned around.

"OY! FIRST MATE! FRONT AND CENTER!" Hooks stood on the main deck, his coat and collar impeccably tidy, also strangely dry, for a man who'd just gone for a mid-day swim. "And where is that bloody music woman? Is she passed out again?" The quarter master continued to shout his words as loudly as possible. Serkan cleared his throat.

"Coat-rack, I'm right here." From his distant vantage point of 5 feet, Serkan thought he could detect a faint trace of tears on Hooks' face. Nah. That's probably rum.

Scratching the stubble on his chin, the first mate gave a nonchalant shrug in response to the quarter master's questions. "I dunno where Cabbage is. Hopefully tunin' that harp of hers." Deciding this was the perfect opportunity to pitch his request, Serkan hoisted the loops of line in his hand. "Say, I was meanin' to ask: when are we buyin' new line? This is all that's left in our storage, and I had to secure the sails with dental floss today."

He waved the rope in front of Hooks. "What's gonna happen if we git cavities?"

 

[Digi-Guy]

Hooks raised an eyebrow at Serkan. He was right, they were in desperate need of ropes. The crews bungi antics and taken its toll on the ropes, and poor Teegans knee caps. Poor sods legs couldn't quite handle the wiplash bit of the bungi jump. But the cavity part? Nonsense! His crew was quite hygienic.

"Listen, Serkan. Our crews teeth are..." Hooks started to say, but the sight of one his crew walking by gnawing on what appeared to be half a shoe stole his words. "Sorry, our crewman take fine care..." Hooks was again stopped when one his sailors on the port side of the ship yawned. It wasn't the yawn that threw him off. No, it was the peculiar green fog that seemed the be emanating from the mans gaping whole that was his mouth. "Ugh...as I was saying...their teeth are...SON OF DOUBLE CROSSIN BELGIUM BAR WENCH!?" The next sight to throw him off his sentence was one that he could hardly be blamed for. For the ships swabbie, a crusty old sea dog by the name of Mr. Sticky, was walking toward Hooks with what was either a demented and twisted snarl that could scare the skin right off a narwhal, or it was Mr. Stickys attempt at a smile. Hooks hoped it was the former. It was common knowledge that if Mr. Sticky was smiling, it usually wasn't something delightful. The worst part was having to see inside of Mr. Stickys mouth. For inside the maw of Mr. Sticky was not teeth, but rather shards of bone, glass, and few corks. If a rainbow had ugly step sister, it lived inside of Mr. Stickys mouth. The most putrid and rancid of colors dwelt within those flapping lips. Rancid and putrid.

"Oi iyz gerna deuw dah fing fer aawl dergh laydeez" croaked Mr. Sticky as he proceeded to gyrate his body in such a way that it looked like it was painful for him to do.

"Mr. Sticky, stop that at once, now get your slimy self out of my sight!" Orderd Hooks as he turned his head away in utter disgust. The rickety old man mumbled something under his breath...his very foul breath, and shuffled away. "Right Serkan. I hid some of the money from the last raid from the captain. Once we dock I will entrust it to you. You are to first and foremost by the entire crew new dental care products. Then you may buy ropes for the ship. Do not buy booze. We have enough booze on the ship right now to drown a whole village of Irishman." Hooks said racistly. Hooks stepped past the first mate and walked a few paces. he stopped and spun around to face his first mate. "And I am not a coat rack!" the quarter master said sternly. Once again he turned around and walked away. But he stopped again and this time yelled out "Cabbage! Where are you? I swear if I find you face down in the rum again I am not giving you mouth to mouth again!" Hooks shouted rather loudly.

 

[SunsetBumpkin]

Through the grates of the deck that lead down to the bottom, the strong odor of Rum swiveled its way up above. "Cabbage!" echoed through patches of daisies reaching up from behind to Kale. She turned around with a crooked smile as she leaped through the meadow. "Oy there purty noises. Are you calling me for-" A rough patch of the sea caused some empty bottles of rum to crash down on to Kale's head as she kicked her feet up, eyes wide open. Where's thee daisies?! Poor Kale thought. She looked down to the empty bottles as the whole area just stunk of liquor, she took her smooth hands and wiped the drool that trickled down her face or it was rum that never made it down her throat; she couldn't tell. A few steps ahead of her were stairs but instead she leaned against the barrel to close her eyes again. "Cabbage!" She heard again. So Kale took a deep breath and shouted; "I'm right here gosh be dang nabit!"
Kale brushed off her pants as she picked up her harp and headed towards the stairs. The whole way to she cursed every step she took hoping she would break a leg so she could go back to her field of daises. Her boots thudded against the stairs as she pushed a grate up that turned out to be behind the crew, she peeked her fiery red head out as her piercing blue eyes glanced at the captain.
"Aye, what yee want? Don't yer tell me it's another dang song.... I know yer love me voice!" The unfortunate soul mouthed.
Sometimes it was funnier to just let her think she could be heard. But Kale shortly slumped over half ass'd with her legs still on the stairs and her body just resting above. Her harp rested next to her and looked like it has been beaten across someone's head, the smell of rum grew stronger as the breeze whisked it past everyone.

 

[Digi-Guy]

"HARUMPH!" Harumphed Hooks in anger. "Well, looky here everyone! Apparently our illustrious whimsically inclined music lady has donned it appropriate to just lay down. Never mind all the chores that need doin! Never mind the fact that Teagens knee caps popped out and Witch can't seem to put them back in quite right." As if on cue, a blood curdling scream followed by a delighted cackle sounded from the med bay. "Ahem, well since Kale thinks it's okay to lay down, why don't we all just lay down together? Hmm? Yes, I think we all will. Every one lay down. That's right, forget all the important work there is to be done. Forget about the lively hood of everyone on this vessel and just lay down." Hooks said as he layed flat on his back. "DO IT! Everyone lie down right now. That means you too Serkan. Surely you don't have any pressing matters because we all don't have to pull our own weight anymore! Huzzah! We will all grow fat like the good Captain Lawfrey!" Hooks said sarcastically. After a few minutes passed, and more then one crew member fell asleep. Hooks stood up and walked right up to Kale.

"I told you yesterday that since Teegen can't climb right now because of his near fatal injury." Another scream and cackle came from the med bay. "So I need you in the crows nest! So get up there and if you see anything give a shout." Hooks said barely holding his laughter. The poor women couldn't speak. So putting her in the crows nest sounded entirely too hilarious to not do. The thought of her frantically waiving her arms and screaming in total silence was something he would cherish for years to come.

Lawfrey walked out of the cabin into the scene of everyone lying on the ground. He walked to the center mast, stepping over and on a few of the people as he did. He picked up a half eaten muffin he must have left there earlier and walked back into his cabin with out saying a single word to any one.

"Well quit lying about get back to work!" Yelled Hooks.

 

[Trignome]

Through Hooks' entire hygienic lecture, Serkan had nodded along after every sentence, completely in agreement with what the quarter master was trying to say. Yes, the crew's teeth are disgusting. The crewmen take fine care of their mackerel-breath. And of course, their teeth are sons of double crossing bar wenches. Serkan stopped nodding after the last sentence.

It wasn't so much that he disagreed with what Hooks had said; it was the fact that the fast approaching Mr. Sticky was smiling. Or had he just gotten his face unstuck from a grid iron? Whatever the reason for the swabbie's apparent glee, Serkan wasn't entirely sure he wanted to share in the happiness.

Besides, one must always be considerate of another's personal space, and he, not wanting to seem rude, decided to take a few steps back. And then a few more. Even at a polite distance, Serkan could still see Mr. Sticky's contorted expression if he leaned forward and squinted really hard. It seems the swabbie had gotten a new cork fixture where his upper right canine should have been. Dark brown, with a nice, polished touch. It goes well with the unidentifiable slime streaks on his face. Before Serkan could compliment Mr. Sticky on being a wonderfully coordinated abomination, the swabbie began writhing about, obviously in great pain.

Serkan waved over to the grimy thing. "Don't die, Sir Gluey. Your swabbing services are still needed!" His words of reassurance worked their magic, as Mr. Sticky's erratic movements suddenly stopped. Lowering his head in obvious gratitude, the swabbie muttered something under his breath and then shuffled away. As Serkan casually ran back to his spot next to the quarter master, he smiled and lowered his head as well, muttering, "You're welcome."

Hooks turned to address him again. At the 'Irishman' comment, Serkan frowned concernedly. So that's what they'd been saving the liquor for? The captain had a bone to pick with some obscure, Irish village. Ah, but if Captain Lawfrey wanted a bone, he could always pull one from the swabbie's mouth...

A shrill scream startled Serkan from his deeply philosophical ponderings about dental structures.

Looking about in confusion, the first mate was met with a strange sight: the mermaid was slowly being devoured in the gapping maws of a grate-beast; half the crew was sprawled on the main deck, while the other half was currentlly sprawling themselves out on the main deck; the quarter master's face was turning a vibrant shade of purple. Another blood-curdling scream pierced through the latter part of Hooks' nonsensical ranting. Shoot, this ship is haunted. Serkan calmly proceeded to faint in a very manly way: face first.

"Well quit lying about, get back to work!"

The comforting yell of a neurotic quarter master reached Serkan just as he had finished binding the monstrous, cork dentures with mackerel-flavored dental floss. With the grate beast now properly vanquished, the first mate dusted his hands matter-of-factly and sat up, now fully awake. Not wanting to appear lazy or under-tasked, Serkan quickly stood and glanced in the direction the bowsprit was pointing. A faint, hazy mass was looming steadily larger in the distance. He turned and shouted over at Hooks. "Coat rack, we're fast approaching land."

 

[EchoRun]

"Oh, did that hurt?" Maria, or Witch, as she had been appropriately dubbed by the crew, asked the patient in front of her. Any ordinary doctor probably wouldn't have been grinning as much as she was. It was a grin of pure joy, and a few missing teeth. You could tell that she was delighted by this man's pain.

"Kneecaps are quite fun, don't you think, Mr....?" Well, whatever his name was. She wasn't too concerned with names anyway. For whatever reason, he wasn't answering her questions anymore. He was obviously still conscious, though, because he was whimpering and screaming when she would mess with his knees.

"Quit your bellyachin' Tiberious," She says, still grinning, taking a wild guess at his name. "What, I suppose you want me to relocate your knee?" She saw Tim-or-whatever-his-name-was give a slight nod and she sighed. "How dull..."

"Alright," Witch says, picking up a piece of leather off a nearby table and handing it to Thomas. "Bite this." There weren't necessarily a lot of teeth for him to ruin, but she figured it would help. Taking his leg, she said,"Don't worry, this'll only hurt a lot"

The resulting scream of pain from relocating his knee was absolutely splendid. She gave a joyful laugh and practically skipped over to the door. "Lucky you! You need to stay here for a while so you can recover!" She heard him groan in answer. "Yeah, I'd say a week or two before you can leave, maybe even longer! Next time you'll think before you try bungee jumping off the mast." She opens the door. "I'm going to see if this ship has any ice. Stay here." She slams the door behind her when she leaves.

 

[SunsetBumpkin]

Kale's was rudely awoken once again by the Captain, at first she opened her mouth to back talk but before anything was "said" a liquor bubble came blowing out. The flowery aroma of the bubble floated up above in front of Kale's face which made her sway, then the bubble made it's way to the Captain's face; "So I need you in the crows nest! So get up there and if you see anything give a shout." after he spoke the aquatic fishy bubble popped in his face. The droplets it released mainly fell to the ground like rusty diamonds as the rest may have accidentally found it's way onto the Captain. Kale let out a crackled laugh that actually just sounded like someone gasping for air.
She pulled her dead weight out from the grate and managed to stand up with a few close calls of falling back to the ground. The drunken Kale danced her way to the Crows Nest as if she was dancing with the dead but not paying attention she smacked into the pole. This angered her as she threw her fists at it and screamed, then taking a few steps back she leaped up heading towards the Crow's Nest. There was a strong breeze today is her hair flowed like a blood soaked banshee with her red coloring. Kale did not mind being high above as this just meant she could doze off and return to her field of daises and she begun to lean back. It's such a nice day today... She thought.

 

[Digi-Guy]

"Coat rack, we're fast approaching land."

"Ahoy Mates! Give ear to me. No, you dolt not you actual ear. Ugh, look likely! Take in sails! Serkan get to the helm! Kale, keep a weather eye open! Slight to starboard then keep her steady! Witch, fetch my spyglass and then bring me the list of medical supplies you need to buy! Make ready to drop anchor! Aloft the riggings sailors. Haulers, get the cargo from the bilge and stand the ready! No one is to step foot on land until I say! Put ye backs into it and step lively! Commanded the quarter master.
"And Serkan, I am not a coat rack!" added Hooks

Little did anyone know, but there was a large barrel between them and port. The contents of which were most dubious in nature. The only one who would be able to see it was Kale. If the ship continued on its course it would smash into the large barrel.

The captain waddled out onto the deck with a small bag in hand. He glanced casually at the crew hustling about. One of the crew ran into the large man and bounced backwards. If Lawfrey even noticed, he certainly did not show it. He continued his slow and steady pace until he was on the port side of the deck. Once he was at the rail he started to throw out pieces of bread. "C'mere me birdies! Good ol Cap'n got some yummies fer yer achin bellys!" cooed the rotund man. Soon a whole flock of seagulls were swooping in and gobbling up bread. One of the seagulls flew over Serkan and left a nice white present on his right shoulder. Another seagull thought that Witch's hair would make a nice nest. A particularly brave seagull made a dive for Hooks hat. It grabbed it and started to fly off with it. It did not get far. Hooks pulled out his pistol and shot it dead. It and the hate dropped to the deck with a satisfying thud. "Cursed winged weasel" Grunted Hooks as he picked up his hat and placed it on his head. However, he failed to notice the blood soaked feathers that were now stuck to the side of his hat.

 

[EchoRun]

Witch runs back into the med bay to grab her list, taking a quill and tacking 'dental floss' to the bottom of it: All the floss she had in stock seemed to have gone missing overnight, which was unbelievable considering the fact that the floss had remained largely untouched for who knows how long. She waves to Toronto before leaving again, this time armed with her list. Now what else did he want? She asks herself. Besides the list, of course. She passes the Captain, who was throwing bread overboard for the seagulls. She saw the spyglass tucked into his belt.

"Ohhhh..." Now she remembered. Rather than just ask the Captain, who seemed to be very focused on the birds, she took a hold of the spyglass and pulled. It didn't budge. She pulled again, this time harder. It moved a little, but not much. "Alright..." She took a hold of the spyglass with both hands now, and pulled back with as much strength as she could muster. This time it came loose, unlike she had expected, and sent her tumbling back. Witch stood up and promptly dusted herself off and picked up the spyglass she had worked so hard to get. At some point during this, a seagull had come to nest in her hair, which she didn't mind. Or maybe she just didn't notice it as she ambled over to Fish Hooks. "Here ya go!" She says as she proudly holds the spyglass out to him.

 

[Trignome]

Following the quarter master's orders, Serkan dashed to the helm and gripped the wheel firmly, waiting for instruction. Slightly to starboard. Serkan pulled to the right, feeling the ship groan like a mammoth whale in a fish cannery. Or, more aptly, like the Captain when the rum barrels were empty. Holding the position steady, the first mate relaxed his grip and glanced back at Hooks, who was once again denying the truth of his own existence.

"I am not a coat rack!" The quarter master shouted out towards the helm. Serkan sighed in exasperation. Having an identity crisis as a pirate must be tough. Just at this moment, the captain lumbered out from his cabin with a small bag in his hand; the first mate nodded in approval when he noticed. Now, Captain Lardy has much more integrity in that aspect. Look at how confidently he's embracing his identity as a gargantuan warthog. Raising his hand slightly, Serkan wiped a tear away and smiled nostalgically. The captain was growing out so fast; why, just yesterday, it seemed his girth was only twice the width of the ship's foremast. And now he was only 1 ton away from earning his classification as a dwarf planet.

Lost in his old memories of last Tuesday, Serkan didn't notice the seagull. Not until a white feather floated down and balanced, impossibly, on his right shoulder. He reached a hand across to brush the nice little present off before looking up at the seagull that was circling above the helm.It cawed in greeting and dropped another white gift, this one a bit more liquid than the last, onto the first mate's upturned face. Waving genially to his new friend, Serkan drew his revolver out from its holster and returned the seagull's kind gesture with his own little gift.

Bending down to pick up the bird, Serkan wiped off the remaining bits of the bird's present from his face and stood quickly, steadying the wheel. Turning around to look at the commotion on deck, he wondered what he should do with the seagull, before noticing that the quarter master's hat had bloody feathers stuck to it. He shouted out to Hooks before chucking his friend at the man. "Oi, Coat rack! Feed this to your hat!"

 

[Digi-Guy]

"Ah yes, thank you Witch. Oh...there's a..." Hooks was attempting to to notify her of the bird nesting in her hair, but the seagull seemed to be staring daggers at him. Hooks stared back as hard as he could. It was a starring battle. One whose intensity could not be questioned, Man vs bird. The black beady eyes were like windows into the birds soul. He could see hate and and a general disregard for where it dropped is fecal excrement. Hooks matched the hate with his own. The fowl could see the amount of birds that Hooks had killed and eaten in his life time. The seagull knew that given the chance, Hooks would kill it and eat it too. Hooks raised an eyebrow, so did the seagull. The pure force of wills being exerted was rather substantial. Neither one giving an inch. Hooks took his spyglass and and zoomed in on the birds eye. The fowls natural telescope like eyes zoomed in on his eye through the other end if the spy glass. The two opponents stared into each others very souls, each one as dark as the others. When it seemed like the death stare match would never end, a bird carcass hit Hooks in the head an knocked him to the deck. Screaming curses that would make any sailor proud, he fumbled with dead gull trying to throw it away from him. After a short wrestling match, he chucked the dead bird over the side of the ship. Hooks turned back to the death gull. Was it smiling at him? Their stare feud was far from over. There would be another day.

"Who in the bloody blazes of grandmas goose eggs threw that!?" Hooks yelled. But no one answered him. All the while the ominous barrel floated closer to impact with the ship.

 

[SunsetBumpkin]

Looking down from the Crow's Nest, Kale noticed birds flocking around on the deck. She begun to wail her arms screaming, "It's be comin'! The Lord of Birds! We gon' be end up as rotten fish!" Of course there may happen to be no such thing as a Lord of Birds, Kale believed it to be true. She ran in circles around the pole despite the fact she had limited space. My harp! Looking around, she spotted her harp was still on the ground. To grab a mate's attention she begun to flap her arms like a bird and move her body in an up n' down motion. Kale begun to have a psychological break down... Upon giving up, she turned just enough to actually spot something worth reporting about. A barrel was floating in the water and was coming close to the ship. "Ay Mates! We got something here!" She attempted to shout as she jumped up and down excited it may be more booze.
Kale swayed her arms in the air towards the sky like she was trying to summon rain. Then she saw land in the distance causing her to put down her arms. Land made her believe she was safe for now and that maybe she will see the monkey bandits once more. Her mood took a complete one-eighty as she was in a panic to a calm happy-go-lucky maiden. The thoughts left her mind seeing land, then her harp came to mind. My Harp! Glancing back down at it, she decided she will play music once the stepped foot on land instead. It was too much work for her to get down and play this very second unless she was told to.

 

[Crono]

Old Stubb had been sleeping though most of the usual on deck madness, until... He heard them, he felt them. "Seagulls," he muttered as he left the grasp of a liquor- induced coma. He got up, grabbed his rifle, and ran up stairs at a breakneck speed. After 15 minutes he arrived to see that the battle was underway. He turned and shot down approaching air support. He then looked to the deck and saw one of the little devils laying eggs in Which's brain while holding poor Hooks under some dark spell. As he fired at the beast before it spread Hooks was attacked by a... ZOMBIE SEAGULL?! Lucky for Hooks both of his hands were boring old hooks so he struck it down without much struggle, for him. Stubb was about to relax before he saw it. Feathers. Feathers of crimson red. They stuck out of Hooks's hat. Eyes narrowing he called out the child of Satan "So, we meet again El Diablo Gullbladder." He dropped his rifle and unsheathed his cutlass,"Your shape- shifting powers can not save you now." With that he jumped at the hat of pure evil screaming his feared battle cry "BAZINGAAA!"

 

[EchoRun]

Witch looked at Hooks, confused, her head slightly tilted. Amazingly enough, the bird on her head stayed there, either by magic or the bird's will to continue it's intense stare down with the wannabe captain. "What?" She asked. But before he could answer, she head a loud bang, and the seagull flew out of her hair, flying halfway across the deck before landing with a loud thud on the shoddy deck, apparently dead. At the same time, another dead bird attacked Hooks, but that didn't matter at the moment because OH MY GOFF WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BIRD ON MY HEAD?!

"FREDERICK!" She shouted, running over to the now still bird. "PEGGY YOU KILLED STEVEN!" She yelled, now cradling it and glaring at the deranged seagull murderer. "HOW COULD YOU?!" She stroked the gull's head now, and began whispering words of comfort to it.

"It's okay Picasso maybe I can make you better..." She whispered to it. "I'm not ready to let you go yet..." Witch began rocking back and forth, stroking the bird's head. You'd think she'd just lost some life-long pet turtle or something. Suddenly, she stood up and retreated to the med bay to see if she could do anything for Michaelangelo.

 

[Trignome]

"Who in the bloody blazes of grandmas goose eggs threw that!?" Hooks yelled, clearly enraged that his hat was being over-fed.

Serkan bent down to tie his invisible shoelaces, which was such a difficult task that he had to concentrate very hard at making the ninja-bunny run around the ghost tree. Thus, he was unable to tell the quarter master that it was he who had thrown the seagull. Finally, after much exhausting effort, Serkan stood up and proudly inspected his neatly un-tied, laceless shoes. And, oh coincidentally, Hooks was no longer asking about the Seagullist Perpetrator. The Seagullist Perpetrator Serkan smiled and turned back to the wheel, which he suddenly realized had gradually steered the ship steeply to port. He grasped the wheel, and jerked it back as gently as possible. The ship tilted at a moderate, 45 degree angle that surely no one would notice. Unless they were hit with a rolling rum barrel. But that wouldn't do much damage; most of the rum barrels are empty.

Serkan turned back around to face the main deck, calling out to the other crew members, "Steady there, mates, I'm settin' the ship." He paused, scratching his stubble as he viewed the haphazard barrels and line all piled along the starboard of the ship. It appeared to the first mate that the spaghetti of rope and barrels had a few...very human-looking limbs sticking out of the mess as some sort of animated garnish. "Curse those seagulls! They been at it again!"

Shaking his head in exasperation at the mass havoc the seagulls had wreck on the deck, Serkan calmly resumed his position at the wheel.

 

[Digi-Guy]

Hooks sighed and looked up to the sky. From his good vantage point, Hooks got a nice view of the sky. He also saw a frantically waving mute woman. Hooks laughed as he watched the musically inclined lady swing her arms wildly, desperately trying to convey a message. "Wait....is she actually seeing something?" Hooks thoughts were violently interrupted by the sound of.....bazinga.

"Not again..." Hooks said as he rolled to his feet, pulling his Hooks from his belt loops. It was too late. His hat, his favorite hat had been slain by Stubb. "STUBB! You blasted fool!? You got scurvy in your brain again? That was my HAT! BAH! When we get to port I expect you to buy me a now hat! You just can't ruin my hats like that!" grumbled Hooks as he made his way to port side.

The quarter master looked at Witch coddling a dead bird. Despite that, that still was not the most disturbing thing he had ever seen Witch do. Hooks was convinced that he had once seen her summon the devil himself. In which she proceeded to spank the demon till it died....or perhaps that was when Witch had given him to much opium when removing a bullet from his side. She often over prescribed drugs to the crew.

Peering over the side to see what Kale was freaking out about, Hooks spied to giant barrel. Hooks eyes widened as he realized what type of barrel that was. "HARD TO STARBOARD SIDE!" Yelled Hooks in a panic as he held tightly to the rail. The first mate proved why he was the first mate, He cranked the wheel hard pitching the boat into a sharp turn. Some of the crew fell to the deck, others were able to hang on.

"Come about port side and weigh anchor! Fishers get the net, we got something to bring on board!" The fishers grabbed their net with the help of Mr. Sticky, well, Mr. sticky was actually just stuck to the net, but he added nice weight to the net as they cast it out into the water. The barrel stuck to the old slimy coot as they pulled the barrel onto the ship. Soon the whole crew was surrounding the barrel, eager for it's contents. "Step aside!" Ordered Hooks as he waded through the crowd.

Hooks used his meat hook to pull a few planks off the barrel. Inside was a body. Hooks had some crew members pull out the body, the dead body of man. The man had clearly starved to death. "This is an escape barrel. Some sailors use them as a last ditch effort to survive. This poor sod was in there for weeks. Heyo, what's this?" Hooks asked as he pulled a large parchment from the barrel. He unrolled it revealing a DUM DUM DUUUUMMMMM. Treasure map. Cliche, right? The quarter master examined it for a moment, then rolled it up and stuffed it in his jacket.

"Crew. This map is written in Gibberish. I only know one person in the world who can read Gibberish. And she is in port. Serkan, get us into port. Pull up that anchor and lets get movin!" Said Hooks. The quarter master waited till they came into port. Once they were tied on, the crew assembled for instructions. "Alright listen up scally wags. Serkan, Witch, and Stubb you three will head into town and gather supplies. We need dental hygiene products, ropes, medical supplies and ammunition. Serkan you are entrusted with this money." Barked Hooks as he gave the money to Serkan. "Oh and uh, DON'T BUY ANYMORE RUM! WE HAVE ENOUGH! Kale ans Volkan, your with me. We are gonna see if this map is any good to us. The rest of you lot unload our sell-able cargo and accompany the Captain to the market. Please do not let him buy more rum. We seriously have a lot of it right now." Volkan was the espionage, thieving expert, and bonified assassin of the crew. He was shifty fellow who always wore a dark cloak and black half mask. He was as skilled with his mind as he was his dagger. Volkans quick thinking had saved the crew many times. Volkan had also put the crew in just as many bad situations with his kleptomania.

 

[Crono]

With Gullbladder's hat form defeated, Stubb tossed the tatters into the wind laughing ",at last! The demon is dead!" He laughed so hard that he didn't notice Hooks yelling until the last minute."HARD TO STARBOARD SIDE!" The sudden movement of the ship surprised him and he fell with his mouth open. As he hit the deck a wight blob fell into his mouth and in horror he gazed up at the sky and there he was. Sure, he was looking directly at the sun and it was only for a split second but he was absolutely certain that he saw the Red Gull. He shouted a dramatic NOOOOOO into the sky but it came out more like a sick whale moaning, due to demonic poo filling his mouth. As the barrel was hoisted up and opened he had the job of scraping Mr. Sticky off it so he didn't hear much of the conversation. What he heard was "map, gibberish , Stubb, buy ,and rum" at which he completely forgot about the demon escaping, jumped out the boat, and swam to the nearby port. Where he then leaned on his peg- hand and waited for the slowpoke younglings to come, cursing silently as he saw that the ship was already tied on. As he waited, he noticed two strange looking men having a rather heated debate. However it was in a lingo that he didn't understand. Utter gibberish. The men themselves were even weirder, one had a large mushroom growing out his ear and the other had no teeth, at all.

 

[EchoRun]

Witch emerged from the med bay shortly after the barrel was recovered from the water. She was still carrying the seagull, but unfortunately, there was nothing to do for it. While this hit her hard, she perked up when she saw they had almost reached port. " Oh, that's good." Once they were docked, she took a plank from the escape barrel and laid the bird on it, covering it with a cloth before casting it off into the ocean. "Bye Francesco!" She shouted to it, waving it off. "You will be missed." She turns around, wiping away the tears slowly rolling down her cheeks, and returns to the crew, not noticing the sharks ' fins surrounding the makeshift bird-raft.

While Hooks was talking, Witch was busy looking around. The port was fairly busy, and there were more people there than usual. Besides the crew, mushroom-ear man, and toothless, there was also a man with a obnoxiously large blue and red feather coming out of his hat and another person carrying two lizards on their shoulders. And she felt like she recognized the man with the mushroom in his ear, though she couldn't remember from where. Was it...? No... Maybe that one time at... That's not it either... No I got it: it was that one time in Spain with that incident with the bull and the teapot. Good times...

As soon as they were dismissed she snapped out of her thought bubble and met with Stubb and Serkan. "So we need to get whatever it was he said (she honestly couldn't say she knew) and rum, right?" After all, why wouldn't they get rum? It was basically traditional that they get rum every time they went to port. "Is that all?"

 

[Trignome]

dental hygiene products, ropes, medical supplies, ammunition, and don't buy rum...dental hygiene products, ropes, medical supplies, ammunition, and don't buy rum. Serkan nodded to himself, as he ran the shopping list through his mind twice. This wouldn't be such a difficult task, the first mate thought, as he waited for Witch and Stubbs to prepare for their duties. Stubbs was, strangely enough, very wet after walking down from the ship's ramp. He was also strangely fascinated by a fungal man and a gummy man gibbering at each other. There was a nearby, reptilian couple walking their pet human, as well as a man wearing a very well-fed hat, judging by the colorful feathers that protruded from the leather. Serkan scratched his head bemusedly. Are all hats carnivorous?

Witch, on the other hand, was currently feeding the sharks; and after a tearful farewell to her fishy friends, she walked over to where Serkan and Stubbs were standing. "So we need to get whatever it was he said and rum, right?...is that all?"

Serkan sighed in exasperation. "No...we're not buyin' rum; there's only 'nough money for basic supplies." He paused, considering the bat-crazy pair he'd been grouped with. "I mean, we can't buy rum. But Coat-rack never said we couldn't steal any." There. That should keep them preoccupied long enough so I can get all the supplies ready. The moral implications of what he was asking his crewmates to do failed to bother him in the slightest; after all, the local police surely wouldn't mind keeping his two companions in a holding cell for a few hours. "So yes. If you want rum, you'll hafta...borrow it from the folks here."

With that suggestion, Serkan turned and headed for the port town's general store, already trying to decide if he'd get the mackerel or sardine flavored floss.
Perhaps he'll buy both.