What's the Deal with Jealousy?

[MaryGold]

Jealousy is indeed an ugly thing, but it's also really painful and sad. It feels more like that to me since I bottle it up. So it comes and goes in different issues, friends, family and more. So, how do you resolve the issue of your own jealous emotions? Do you immediately confront the subject/s or try to resolve it on your own? What are your methods?

 

[Ardent]

I don't get jealous easily, but when I do, I tend to just rationalize it and distract myself. Then after a while I'll forget about it.

If it comes up in conversation I might honestly say what I feel. Other than that, I don't really do anything or expect the other person to do anything about it. I know it's all in my head.

I might actively try to get to know the person I'm jealous over, because often times it's just the "unknown" that triggers those feelings for me. And I don't want to shun someone else or form a negative opinion of them without even giving them a chance.

 

[Kitti]

Jealousy or envy?
If we mean jealousy and being afraid of losing something (or usually more likely, someone) I don't usually feel in reaction to something they or someone else is doing and more negatively toward myself for being "not enough" in whatever way has come to mind to torment me. It's not always easy but I've found that the best thing to do for me is just ask for the positive reassurance that I need. "I don't feel very [pretty/smart/etc.] right now :(" when I need it, which is mercifully not too often.

As for envy, I can sometimes be bitten by the green fairy but it helps me to: a) if we're friendly, remind myself that I want good things for them and be happy about things going well for them instead of feeling negative or b) try to focus on what hard work they did to get that. It's not perfect, sometimes it seems like some people are just blessed, but there's usually something to be happy for whoever it is. If not, eh, better to just try to focus on something else.