Welcome to the Mental Help Hotline

Delnoir

A Relic of a Bygone Era
Original poster
LURKER MEMBER
FOLKLORE MEMBER
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press - no one will answer.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on line.

If you have amnesia press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

If you are Paorou, leave a message telling us how you got this number so we can keep you from finding it again.
 
Fuck this hot line, I hate using phones anyways. I have autism, so it's all good.
 
9999999999999999999


What am I doing again?
 
*presses 8* ... uh..... hmmmm..

what? name? O_o... *silence*

*hangs up*
 
Hello, this is Parou. Yeah. Some wanker posted this number on the net.

Okay. Will keep in touch. Thank you.
 
THEY DIDNT STEAL IT

I DRANK IT WHILE I WAS DECIDING WHAT NUMBER TO PICK :D
 
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_D9h1xM0_0"]YouTube- Die fantastischen Vier-Die da[/ame]

So it turns out Chaos suffers from wearing outdated Hip Hop outfits.
 
*Hangs up* goddamn being manic depressive... Nobody got love for us. *Listens to emu music*
 
*Cuddles the phone*
 
There's nothing there for rageaholic, sex addicts, or Despotic Tyrants.

What am I supposed to do?
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person